The air was a touch too chill for lost gloves. Cramped as the fast food joint was, Haruhi was happy to be inside a warm place. Families squeezed themselves inside the small eatery, eager to advantage of holiday pricing before evening fell. The chipped tables and boisterous guests were hardly scenic, but they reminded Haruhi of the holidays and consequently of her mother. She could feel a bittersweet smile forming on her face.

The group of teenage girls crowded around the window alerted Haruhi of their presence. Within moments, Kaoru was sliding easily into the booth beside her. She told them showing up at a KFC in a limousine would draw to much attention. Rich bastards.

"Tamaki finally got you to dress more like a girl, huh?" He asked, brushing his dark hair to the side.

She shifted, crossing her legs. Since she'd begun her first year of University her clothes had gradually become more feminine. The choice was not stylistic, but rather a direct consequence of no longer needing to conceal her gender. Although still nothing like the frills and lace her Father and Tamaki had so often dreamed of, it was hardly a standardized boy's uniform. Baby blue plaid pants and a white t-shirt with a paw print on it hung loosely over a sky-blue thermal. Her hair was still short, but she was wearing two white barrettes.

She shifted and toyed with the napkin on the table. Did she really look that different?

"So Haruhi, how have things been with Ta-ma-ki?" Kaoru asked in a singsong voice, fluttering his eyelashes a few times for dramatic effect. "Has he finally made a move?"

The brunette could feel her face flush. What should she tell him? How much information was too much? Kaoru had once harbored feelings for her-maybe even still. Wouldn't it be insensitive to talk about that sort of thing with him? (Who was she kidding? Not like there was much to talk about.)

"I'm not really sure what you mean," she answered cautiously. "Things are the same for us."

Kaoru smiled and Haruhi felt surprised by how natural it looked on him.

"Well you better tell him to hurry up..." A familiar laugh forced Haruhi to turn her head. "Or I might finally have to make my move!" Hikaru interjected, taking his place beside his brother.

"Ah, Kaoru-oh, and Kyouya-senpai!" She stumbled over the suffix. The years she spent with him in high school still ingrained in her mind.

"Haruhi," Kyouya nodded in acknowledgement, "Hikaru."

The both was quickly becoming less comfortable with each additional party member. Haruhi felt squished and they were still short the centerpiece.

"So, how have your holidays been, Haruhi? I'm sure there's some type of commoner-festival coming up any day now, correct?" Haruhi was glad for the simple conversation.

"Mine have been good so far. I'm going to spend New Year's with my Father, and of course I'm going to be giving gifts to everyone soon! They're just simple things, but I hope you'll enjoy them."

"And what about Christmas Eve?" Kyouya wasn't usually one to prod. He usually did his own research. Haruhi glanced down.

"You don't want to become a Christmas Cake, you know!" Hikaru blurted, laughing heartily.

"Hikaru!" Kaoru snapped.

Haruhi hardly had enough time to become offended or embarrassed, she was to overcome by nostalgia.

"Did someone say cake?" Haruhi knew who it was even though the voice was a couple notches deeper. "Hi everybody! Hey, Haru-chan, did you miss me? I haven't seen you since before your entrance exam. I bet you did great, didn't you? Hey, are you guys going to order cake?"

Mori appeared behind him—could Haruhi really refer to Honey-senpai as a man? He was definitely taller than he was in highschool-definitely taller than Haruhi—but still the shortest of her boys. He made up for it with boundless enthusiasm.

"What kind of cake were you going to order?" Honey repeated.

Mori squeezed his large frame next to Kyouya, and Haruhi wondered briefly if they were deliberately not sitting next to her. Honey opted for Mori's lap, and even given the lack of space and smaller frame, they looked ridiculous.

"Haru-chan, Haru-chan!" Honey complained loudly, attracting the attention of several other patrons. He continued on, oblivious. "I got my ear pierced, you know!" Honey tucked his hair behind his ear and leaned across the table to show her the small stud. "I thought it was gonna hurt, but then Takashi said he would do it first if it would make me feel better. Then he held my hand the whole time—and now we match!" Haruhi hadn't even noticed. She glanced to Mori's ear.

"Wow, that looks really good on you two." She smiled warmly.

"Ah! Sorry for leaving you waiting Haruhi—I had to—" The blond stopped abruptly and observed everyone seated.

"What's wrong with Tamaki?" Kaoru whispered.

There was a sudden explosion of energy and tears that rivaled even Honey's exuberance.

"Ohhhh—it's like the whole family's together again!"

Tamaki flung himself dramatically across the table and encircled his arms around Kyouya.

"Oh Mommy, I haven't seen you in so, so, so long!"

Tamaki proceeded to gush over each former-Host Club member individually, asking questions like when did you grow so tall, and did you miss me, did you miss me, and why don't you ever visit?

"Oh Mommy, you're so terrible! Abandoning me for your business and leaving me to raise our only daughter all alone!" He threw his hand over his forehead.

Haruhi shouldered his touch away. "Tamaki, I'm not your daughter. I already have a father." He hadn't said things like that in a long time.

"Hey tono, don't you think it's a bit disturbing that you're still calling Haruhi your daughter?" Hikaru asked.

"It is is a bit incestuous." Kyouya inclined his head.

"Yeah, and incest isn't funny, Tamaki," Kaoru said solemnly, resisting the urge to laugh. "Even as a joke."

"Incest?" Tamaki screeched indignantly. His fists knocked the table and anyone not already openly staring turned their heads. "But I—Haruhi?"

He stared at her with pleading eyes. She shrugged. The rest of the club reacted similarly.

"Kyouya? Honey? Mori?" Tamaki's eyes flickered between them.

"Don't you think we're passed that now?" A low voice rumbled.

Mori and Honey had long moved on to University with everyone else not far behind. It was strange without the Host Club to look forward to, but Haruhi was slowly adjusting to her new life, her new apartment, and her new—well—whatever Tamaki was supposed to be to her.

Tamaki shrugged into the booth beside her, squeezing everyone together and almost pushing Mori out of of the other side. A few years ago he might have begun wailing and moping, but Honey wasn't the only one who had done some growing up.

"So Haruhi, this is a real commoner diner? Everything is so tiny and cramped—and no one is dressed up at all!" Tamaki exclaimed excitedly, glancing around like a child in a candy store.

"Not to mention we've been here for practically ten minutes, and a waiter has yet to ask us if we wanted rinks," Hikaru complained dryly.

"Hikaru!" Kaoru whispered, "Don't say insensitive things like that. Businesses like this probably can't afford to hire enough people so that everyone has their own waiter! You're going to offend Haruhi!"

Haruhi rolled her eyes. She supposed there would always be things the Host Club wouldn't be able to understand.

"Do we get to wash our own dishes?" Tamaki asked, nearly bouncing in his seat, and for a moment Haruhi wasn't sure if he was patronizing her or not.

"Of course not. There is no waiter. You have to stand in line and place your order."

After several embarrassing attempts where various former Host Club members attempted to order various expensive things that were obviously not on the menu, Haruhi shushed them and ordered them all "Christmas Chicken" specials.

Honey waved his hand in front of Tamaki's face. "Hey, Tamaki, Tamaki! Did you see my ear? Mori and I had our ears pierced!"

Tamaki stared in awe. Haruhi wondered briefly if Honey repeated the story to everyone he came in contact with.

"That's so cool you guys! Did it hurt? When did this happen? Are you guys gonna get tattoos too?!"

Tamaki was easily roped in, eyes glittering, imagining the two with cool haircuts and motorcycles to match.

"So you guys are official now, right?" Hikaru asked offhandedly.

"Yes." Mori had already spoken more than usual.

"Official?" Tamaki tilted his head. He was always the last one to figure things out. "Officially what?"

"I can't believe he didn't notice." Kaoru whispered to his twin.

"Well we all know how long it took him to figure out Haruhi's gender." Kyouya commented.

"Not to mention the fact that he liked her," Hikaru continued.

"I mean, even you noticed before he did," Kaoru chuckled.

"You guys—don't talk about me like I'm not here—I can hear you! What do you mean official? And it didn't take me that long to figure out that Haruhi was a girl! I knew she was cute right from the beginning!"

Haruhi felt the urge to hide in the ladies room.

"Aw, you're making her blush." Hikaru teased.

"What's official? Honey, Mori? What's going on!?"

"What Mori said but you were obviously too dense to understand, was that perhaps it is like you said those many years ago, and some of us are indeed the homo side characters."

"Ho..mo...side characters?" Tamaki repeated slowly, dumbfounded.

Exasperated, Honey decided to explain it once and for all. "It's like with you and Haru-chan!"

Tamaki's face remained blank.

"Tamaki, it's like this!"

Then Honey-senpai did the unthinkable, craned his neck upwards and kissed Mori, quick and chaste. There was such a sense of ease—like he'd been doing it for years. Haruhi glanced away just in time to catch Tamaki's face slowly coloring red.

Tamaki gaped, wide eyed. "But Mori! When I asked you if you ever thought about kissing Honey you said no! Now you and Mori are...Haruhi and I aren't like that!" Tamaki shouted, slamming his hands down onto the table and standing. The plasticware shook. He was blushing furiously at the mere implication.

"I will go test the commoner restroom!" Tamaki announced, barreling toward the bathroom in the far corner of the restaurant.

Several customers threw them dirty looks and grumbled about all the commotion. Haruhi swallowed thickly and idly twiddled her thumbs. She could feel five sets of eyes watching her every move.

"Haru-chan, I thought that you and Tamaki were…" Honey started cautiously.

Mori silenced him. "Mitsukuni."

Kyouya tried to smooth the situation over. "Haruhi, Tamaki can be rather slow at times."

"Kyouya, I heard you business is doing well." Haruhi blurted suddenly, desperate for a topic change.

The conversation sailed smoothly for a few minutes, the six of them exchanging stories about their new lives—too many projects and simpler worries and Haruhi getting a new part-time job.

"And then I said—that's not my boyfriend—he's my brother!"

The table burst into laughter, and Haruhi laughed too, for a moment forgetting that Tamaki still hadn't reappeared. The silence that settled was broken by Kyouya. Mori and Honey senpai were forced to move so he could leave the booth.

"I'm going to excuse myself for a moment Haruhi, perhaps I can convince Tamaki to return the table. I'm sure this isn't even necessary to say, but he can be very melodramatic at times."

Kyouya headed toward the bathrooms, and the table was draped in an eerie silence.

"Um, Haruhi—I know this is kinda personal, but how exactly are you and tono doing?" A tentative voice asked.

Haruhi glanced up, it was Kaoru, of course. It's easier without Kyouya's daunting gaze.

"I'm not really sure myself. He seems to still think of me as his daughter."

It was beginning to drive her crazy. They were living together! A peck on the forehead, a warm embrace, but then afterwards always a smile, and then, "I can do that you know, because I'm your father!"

Except he really wasn't her father.

"I think tono is just shy!" Honey offered; smile warm.

Haruhi wanted to think so too.

"Maybe you should just be the boy again."

Someone said—and no one was quite sure who had said it until the they remembered that Mori was still there.

"The boy...?" Haruhi asked for clarification.

Didn't Tamaki want her to be more like a girl? Wearing stupid skirts and barrettes, all so that Tamaki would think of her as something other than a daughter, and now Mori was telling her to go back to how she'd been in high school?

"Well, tono is more like a girl than you are Haruhi," Hikaru said with a shrug.

"He means personality-wise!" Kaoru amended, throwing his older brother a bothered look.

Haruhi considered it. She agreed that there was definitely a possibility, but then, if they were wrong—she'd feel so stupid.

"Maybe you should ask him if he wants to go out tomorrow night!" Honey suggested. "Couples always go out on Christmas Eve!"

Hikaru raised a brow. "But don't the boys usually ask girls that sort of thing?"

"See that's what I mean! I think tono is just so girly in his head that he doesn't—"

"Tamaki!" Kaoru interrupted.

They all turned at once.

"Tamaki." Kyouya said pointedly, staring at him.

"But, Mommy," Kyouya gave him a sharp look.

"Oh Honey, Mori! I hope you aren't mad at me!" Tears seemed to appear instantaneously, waterfalls cascading to the floor.

"I don't think it's gross or anything like that I just was surprised and confused and I really didn't mean any harm! Please don't hate me now!"

Before Tamaki could apologize any further, a staff member appeared at their table.

"I apologize, but I'm going to have to ask you all to leave the premises. We've had several complaints."

The next day was difficult for Tamaki, emotions running rampant. If Mori had lied that day back in Ouran—that he really did think about kissing Honey—and now Honey and Mori were like that, then did it mean that he and Haruhi would end up like that too?

Wasn't wanting to kiss your daughter and show affection normal? Every father loved his daughter!

"It's natural to want to kiss and hug them and be around them all the time!"

Tamaki exclaimed suddenly, sounds reverberating off of white walls in an empty apartment. Who was he trying to convince? The more Tamaki thought about the situation—and he thought about it a lot—the more worried he became.

He pondered on it as he did the dishes. It wasn't so normal to think of your daughter constantly, was it? He placed a saucepan in the dishwasher with a loud clatter. Shouldn't a father think of other things as well? He didn't think of Kyouya or anyone else even half as much. He sighed and turned off the water. Nothing could distract him.

He paced around the house chewing on his bottom lip. What was he supposed to do when Haruhi returned? It wasn't as though he could just go to the other side of the house like he could with his grandmother back at his own home.

Despite his great insistence that he could buy them something much larger and fancier, Haruhi had settled on a meager two bedroom apartment. In her eyes, struggling to pay a monthly bill and scrounge up her last bit of yen to go grocery shopping—it was part of being a young adult.

After circling the small living room a few more times, he decided to spend some time with the calendar, crossing off the days that had passed so far. He had little else to do without Haruhi around to scold him or tell him what to do.

He mumbled to himself as he drew a thick black line through each day with a permanent marker. He reached December 24th.

"Confession!?"

Directly under the small 24, written in perfect lettering, was a single word: Confession.' Had Haruhi done something wrong? Was going to turn herself into the authorities? Or was it that kind of confession? Tamaki wasn't sure which was worse.

And the twenty-fourth, wasn't that Christmas Eve? It had to be a romantic confession. His little Haruhi was going to confess her feelings to someone! To whom? Tamaki left tracks in the carpet as he wracked his brain. Haruhi had not mentioned any boys. Was she keeping it a secret? Was Haruhi in love with the kind of guy no father could ever approve of?

What if it was an older man she'd met at University? A liberal with crazy ideals or a foreigner who didn't shave and wanted to whisk Haruhi away to America with promises of fancy tuna and foreign food!

"These are purely paternal thoughts!"

Besides, this could be anyone that Haruhi was going to confess to tomorrow! What if it was a teacher who had seduced his innocent daughter? Promises to boost her grade and Haruhi really did care about her grades an awful lot.

His daughter would never stoop so low!

But what if she'd been worried and overworked? What if she had no choice and was being taken advantage of but she was too afraid to ask for help because he was threatening her friends and the only family she had left?!

His eyes bulged as he stared at the tiny print. But then again, it did say confession, and that kind of thing was usually voluntary.

It hardly settled his stomach. Haruhi had no idea what was best for her! Whoever it was had probably lied to Haruhi and now she had the wrong idea about him, that he was nice and sweet when really he was just a filthy scoundrel, probably involved with the Yakuza or some other vagabonds, and any minute he was going to pull up outside in his motorcycle with a bunch of tattoos and—

"No daughter of mine is getting involved with the Yakuza!"

"Who's getting involved with the Yakuza?"

Tamaki screeched in terror, flinging himself across the room and tripping over his own legs before flailing silently and falling behind the couch.

"Please don't!" He cowered, covering his face. "I can pay you off!"

"Tamaki?"

A violet eye cracked open slowly. "Haruhi?"

"Who else would just be waltzing into our apartment?" She arched an eyebrow and shook her head.

"I'm so glad you're safe!"

Tamaki was on his feet in an instant, wrapping his arms around Haruhi and pulling her against him.

She blushed. "Of course I'm safe. What's wrong with you?" She asked, words muffled against his chest.

"I just worry for you! Getting involved with foreigners and Yakuza, and you know—I heard America has it's own sort of Yakuza, except they call them the—"

Haruhi took a step back. She gave him a long, hard look. "Are you sure you're not sick?"

"Of course!" Tamaki could feel himself sweating. "I'm in a perfectly normal and healthy condition!"

"Why on earth would I be involved with the Yakuza, or foreigners, for that matter?"

His face matched a cherry. He couldn't tell her that he'd seen what was written on the calendar. That he knew her secret. It was probably something very personal that she wasn't ready to speak about and that's why she hadn't yet told him herself. She might even consider it an invasion of privacy. But then, it was on the calendar in the living room, plain as day.

"Haruhi, I know that you're at that age where you're becoming interested in romance, and well, I just wanted you to know…" The words stuck in his throat. "That whoever you choose, I'd just like to meet them first. It's my duty as your father to make sure that this man is good enough for my little girl!"

Haruhi held a strange expression. "Right."

Haruhi looked hurt, and as she headed towards her bedroom Tamaki felt distinctly guilty. What had he done wrong? Was he too overprotective?

Wouldn't it be unfair? To want Haruhi all to himself? To want to see her every day and make her a bento before she leaves for University. He even entertained thoughts of her having his children.

Children?! His grandchildren, of course, because Haruhi is his daughter. Not children like he and Haruhi would be having children together because he definitely didn't wonder whether or not they'd get her big brown eyes or his blond hair!

"I'm sick, aren't I?" He wondered out loud, flopping himself face-down onto the carpet.

He stared at his cellphone a few feet away on the coffee table. It was high time he phoned a friend for help. Someone who was already an expert in the field of impure thoughts and incestuous feelings, and yet, someone who wouldn't ridicule him.

Kaoru!

Tamaki sluggishly pulled himself across the carpet until he could reach the little device. There was a keychain with a teddy bear dangling from the top. The phone rang six times before connecting to voicemail. The second time he calls, it doesn't ring at all.

Of all the times for Hikaru to ignore him, why now? After a few hours of puttering around the house and very, very awkward dinner between him and Haruhi he'd finally decided that enough was enough. It was obviously affecting his relationship with Haruhi—so something needed to be done.

And of course Kaoru still wasn't answering his phone!

This time it was actually important. Thinking of Haruhi in that sort of way...her pretty brown eyes, and that lovely smile, and the way her breasts were so small and cute and perky...

He scrambled to redial the numbers.

"Hi, this is Kaoru. I'm not here right now but you can leave a message—"

"He won't call you back!"

"Hikaru, shut up!"

The voicemail cut off and was followed by a tone. Tamaki glanced at the clock. It was nearing eleven in the evening. Perhaps Kaoru had already gone to bed for the night? But then, Kaoru had always been a night person, and it wasn't as if he was some sort of old man.

Tamaki dialed again. Please answer, please answer, please answer, please—

"...Hello! Tamaki?" a strained voice answered, and the blond found himself caught quite off guard.

Why did Kaoru sound so uncomfortable? Had Kyouya woken him up for this? Was he going to be angry? It didn't matter. There was no time for rationalizing. He could be jeopardizing his relationship with his only daughter!

"Listen, I was thinking about Mori and Honey and how one time back in Ouran I asked Mori if he thought about kissing Honey and he said no, but then I realized that I was a father so it was okay, but now that I know that Mori did think about kissing Honey and now that Mori and Honey are like that, I was thinking that it would make me and Haruhi like that! And then I was thinking some more and I started thinking some, some—"

It was now or never.

"Some less than platonic things about her!" Tamaki blurted.

Tamaki felt lighter and heavier simultaneously. While he had finally said it out loud and gotten it off his chest, verbalizing it made his feeling that much more real. Silence greeted him. Was Kaoru disgusted?

"Well I thought I'd call you because I know that you and Hikaru are like that."

Kaoru huffs. "That's hardly the same!"

Anger erupted on the other side of the line. Well of course Tamaki knew that stuff was only for show, but he had never been one hundred percent sure.

"It's close enough, right?"

There was the whole sleeping in the same bed thing. Tamaki opted not to say the last bit. Kaoru sounded angry enough as it was. He seemed to be running on a short fuse.

"What do you want, tono?" Kaoru asked, exasperated.

"How should I know? Can't you just tell me what to do or give me some advice? I mean, one minute Haruhi is my young, innocent daughter, and the next minute I'm having impure thoughts about her! I mean, I know I'm not related to her by blood, but a father's bond needs knows no bounds. Isn't it just all so wrong?"

"No, I don't think it's wrong. It's not as though Haruhi is actually your daughter. Remember?"

"But the only other reason I could be thinking such things is if I had some kind of romantic feelings for her. Could you imagine? Me and Haruhi?"

"What's so weird about that?"

Tamaki retreated into his own thoughts again. Speaking out loud was for his own benefit.

"You don't think it's possible that maybe it's been this way all along, do you?" Tamaki mumbled.

How could he have been so confused? What did Haruhi think? Had she known? For how long? Always? Was she disgusted?

"Do you think that I should confess?"

That was a terrifying thought. No time for such impractical things as love and like, that's probably what she'd say. There was a long silence where Tamaki was unsure if Kaoru has disconnected the call.

"But you know, what if she doesn't like me? Or even worse, she thinks I'm disgusting. She thinks of me like a father, and I've turned out to be just as bad as the rest of them!"

"If I hang up, you should call her. It's a sign?"

Tamaki was puzzled. "What?"

Click.

Tamaki was suddenly struck with one distinct urge: to run and tell Haruhi that she was right; she doesn't need two fathers, so can Tamaki please, please, be her boyfriend instead?