This is...I'm not quite sure really. A parody of anything that comes into my brain. Though if anyone has any suggestions those would be appreciated. :) Hope the inspiration keeps coming!
I own nothing Avatar related. Cameron, Airbender, or otherwise.
"Man, this will be the first time we'll all be together in over a year!" Katara exclaimed to her brother and his girlfriend as they were walking through Ba Sing Se.
"Meh, I don't see why we always have to meet at the tea shop though. Why doesn't anyone ever come visit the Southern Tribe? It's not even that cold anymore with global warming and stuff!" Sokka complained, stretching his arms.
The trio were walking briskly down a less inhabited area of the city, relishing the bright sun beating on their backs after a long and crowded ferry ride. ("I'd take the Serpent's Pass any day," Suki commented.) They had almost forgotten the feel of Earth Kingdom boats, more like a boulder shoving violently through water rather than a streamlined Water Tribe ship.
The Kyoshi warrior only made a small laugh as they passed by a couple of empty stalls, some containing radishes and others containing opera masks. "Well, Iroh's tea is definitely more welcoming than your stewed sea prunes."
"Hey!" the Water Tribe siblings voiced in unison. Just as they were about to spout how amazingly delicious and squishy and tender and succulent their self-caught sea veggies were, a group of shadows descended over them, landing squarely on the dirt path, encircling the teens.
"Katara and Sokka of the Water Tribe, and Suki of the Kyoshi Warriors," said one of the shadows, dressed in only black with a bright yellow mask set against his face.
"And who are you guys?" Katara addressed suspiciously, instinctively going into a waterbending stance. But another one of the figures, this one in a green mask, quickly grabbed her wrists and bound them with rope.
"Hey—!" Sokka withdrew his boomerang, but not fast enough; a red mask dodged elegantly underneath his slash, tripped the man, and proceeded to bind him as well.
Suki swiftly lept back before any of the figures could make a grab for her. She snapped out a golden fan tucked in her belt and jumped forward. Dodging underneath one man's sword and blocking another man's spear, she spun and jabbed at two jugulars, sending two of the masked figures to the ground. But Suki was outnumbered; they overpowered her and threw her next to their line of bodies.
"What do you guys want?" Suki shouted vehemently, wriggling against her binds.
"We…" a shadow came forward as the rest parted into opposite lines, "Are the Spirit Brigade!" The man the trio correctly guessed as the leader because of his multi-colored mask swung his arm into the air, pointing passionately at the sun that bathed him in a halo of light. The rest of the group arranged themselves in the order of the rainbow and adapted similar vigorous poses, accenting the leader.
The masked attackers held their positions for a couple of seconds before Sokka broke the silence: "Oh, so you guys basically work with the Blue Spirit."
The leader jumped out of his trance and lashed back, "No! Not the Blue Spirit! We are…"
This time the whole band shouted, "the Spirit Brigade!"
A small cough was made off-camera but everyone heard it.
"Um…sorry, never heard of you guys." Katara looked at them dubiously.
"That's because we're a brand-new, new-and-improved, can't-believe-it's-not-butter rebel force, THE SPIRIT BRIGADE!" The leader thought that the third time would be the charm, but he was met with badly suppressed snickers.
"Quiet you peace-loving fools!" shouted a purple mask, stepping out of the line to address the youngsters. "The Blue Spirit's opera mask has always been a symbol of defiance and radicalism. In times of war, he fought for the Avatar and for peace. And now that there is peace, we're going to topple this meek government to the ground and return the Fire Nation to its formal glory, led by the genius Lee Min—!"
Her fiery speech was quickly shut down by Lee Min, who slapped her upside the head. "How many times do I have to tell you, don't give out my real name, you lemur-brain!" The purple mask apologized profusely and retreated back to her place in line, sniffling. "Now, we all know that you three are good friends with the Fire Lord—"
"—um not really," Sokka interjected, "He always tells me how he'll roast me alive if I make one more joke, which by the way, are actually pretty funny but he's got a koala-otter shoved too far up his—" He yelped as one of the figures jabbed him in the belly. Suki did her best to face-palm with her palms tied up.
"So we are going to kidnap you three in order to draw him out. There's no way we can take him down now with the Dragon of the West and the Avatar in one place."
"Just you wait," Katara bit out, "when I get out of these bonds I'm going to freeze you all to a ceiling, and when Aang finds you, he will Avatar-state you so hard that your children will feel the spirits before they've even been conceived—" The yellow-mask whipped out a rag and quickly gagged the Water Tribe native, making her only weapons the daggers piercing out of her eyes.
"Does she always get this feisty?" Lee Min asked the other two, and they gave him looks saying you have no idea.
"Leader," an orange-mask called out, "do we really need to bring all of them? They look kind of heavy."
"Hey! It's all muscle weight! I have a BMI of 21!" Suki responded, affronted.
The Leader ignored her as he rubbed his plastic mask-mustache, mulling over his subordinate's point. "Hmm, that is true. Having so many hostages will only slow us down. And one is as good as three." He put his arms on his waist in a manner showing that he made a decision and that all should marvel at it and said, "Alright we'll take the woman who doesn't talk as much!"
"Wait no, don't you dare touch Suki!" Sokka tried to bite the kidnapper who was grabbing Suki but ended up rolling over into an awkward position, his body bent like a lizard-worm.
"Mmf, mmf!" the waterbender let out as loudly as she could, trying to hop back onto her feet from her prone position.
"Hey, let's think about this for a second. I've already been kidnapped already, and I ended up managing to escape from the Boiling Rock. The others won't think too much of me being taken again because they know I have a penchant for becoming more badass out of nowhere and will kick all of your butts into the desert."
Sokka looked like he was about to mention how he was the one who came up with the way out of the volcanic island, but he had been jabbed in soft places enough times that afternoon.
"That's true, I remember during guard duty over there I saw her leap, like 50 feet into the air and, like, kick a man triple her size into the wall," threw in the orange-mask in support.
The Leader nodded in agreement. "Alright, we'll take the male then." The largest of the group picked up Sokka and tossed him over his shoulder like a sleeping bag, leaving an apologetic Suki giving her boyfriend a I know you've put on makeup and fought in a dress before so I know you'll be okay look. A flash of fear glinted across Katara's eyes as she watched her brother get hauled way, but it was quickly replaced by surprise as she felt someone grab her by her hood.
"Yah, might as well take the angry one to sell later. We could probably fetch a large amount for her on the slave market. She looks like the type," the leader stated.
"And the last one?" one of the figures asked.
"Hmm, I guess just hit her over the head. Hopefully she'll get amnesia and will forget my name. You know how random that illness is. And it'll show the Fire Lord that we're serious." Nobody could see behind the pink-and-lime-green mask, but everybody could tell that the Leader was making a very serious look at the moment.
The white-mask nodded. He picked up a nearby Earth-Kingdom-approved stone and clobbered Suki over the head with it. The woman struggled to keep her eyes open as her vision swam. The figures of Katara and Sokka began to blur as the Spirit Brigade melted into the shadows. Then, everything went dark.
I read somewhere that kidnapped-Katara-turned-slave is a very popular plot? Not too sure what I'll do with that yet but I'm working on it. :)
Comments, critiques, whatever's on your mind is always loved!
