A/N: This started out as the one and only chapter for Down At the Tavern. Then I realized that it would be a lot of fun to share just why Arthur thinks Merlin is a tavern regular, all evidence to the contrary (or so we think). Planning ahead for the next stretch of that fic I realized that this one-shot no longer fits in with the plot. It will still be posted in a very much revised form, probably scattered throughout multiple chapters staring Ch. 17, but I thought I would post the original for any who were interested.

For any who came to this before reading Down at the Tavern, there's really no spoilers that you couldn't have guessed yourself. If you like this please feel free to check out the other fic.

And now on with the show!

It had started out as a normal day –

"Rise and Shine!"

"Merlin!"

– but then his favorite manservant had disappeared, again, and since all swords were needed in the field due to a large magical beast that had been roaming the area Arthur was forced to ride patrol… with Gwaine… alone.

"I swear I'm going to kill that man!"

"Can't have that can we? I won a bet with him. He has to pay up first!"

Arthur palms his face into his hand. "Gwaine, will you shut up."

"Of course … m'lord."

Arthur raises his head and turns around to glare at the knight only for Gwaine to start laughing.

"And just what is so funny Sir Knight?"

The amused knight merely pantomimes leaving an imprint of rein and buckle across his face. Arthur reddens in embarrassment and anger.

"Oh shut up, will you!"

For the next minute and a half – Arthur is counting – they ride in silence.

Then a loud crack and an unnaturally painful sounding shriek sends both of them reaching for their blades. They slide off their mounts and with a whispered 'whoa' ground-tie the animals.

With only the quite whisper of their boots against the ground they stalk forward. A gap in the ground gives away the location of a ravine and they flank it; coming in from either side as the narrow gully is only a few hundred yards in length.

Slowly they creep forward towards the presumed location of the scream. Carefully they check every wrinkle in the rock until they stand face to face again.

"They're around here somewhere. It's the only place to hide."

They turn back to back and are just about to search again when a low moan catches their ears.

"Quick over there!"

They slink towards the cliff face. Nothing.

Gwaine sighs. "Well if that's all." Flopping against the stone cliff he lets out a squeak of his own when he falls straight through the thick ivy tearing a chuck down in the process.

"Arthur."

"You've made a fool out of yourself again Gwaine?" the King chuckles.

"You're not going to like this."

The serious tone immediately sobers the King. He steps through the curtain of leaves and groans.

Sunlight filters through a large, and obviously recent hole in the ceiling of the cave. Caught in the dusty light is the, apparently dead, black-furred beast they'd been hunting. And caught between it's wing and a large piece of rubble is his least favorite manservant, Merlin.
The cocky idiot has his eyes open and seems to be fairly alert as Gwaine and Arthur dig him out and as soon as he's free, he cringes away from the knowing look in Gwaine's eye and the furious one in Arthur's.

"Just what do you think you are doing out here?"

His friend winces and then his lips rise in a lopsided grin. "Well, uh, you see-" His eyes widen and Arthur stifles a grin of his own behind his anger as Merlin tries and fails to come up with an explanation " uh. . . . I don't supposed you'd believe I'm at the tavern right now?"

Later when the beast is disposed of, the extra patrols recalled and Merlin treated he quietly knocks on his King's door.

"You don't have to knock Merlin."

Sheepishly, he slips in.

"You called for me Sire."

"Enough with the titles Merlin. I get enough of that in court."

"Yes Arthur."

His friend is quietly subdued as if he doesn't quite know if he's going to get a reprimand or not. To be fair, Arthur's not sure himself.

"How can you be so stupid sometimes?"

". . . ?"

"I presume that if I went down to The Rising Sun none of the staff would recognize you?"

"Uh…"

Merlin doesn't know what to say. There's no evidence that Arthur is even close to the truth and yet…

"Are you risking your life every time Gaius tells me you're 'down at the tavern?'"

So what do you think?