"Campbell, what are your plans during your run in the NHL?"
"Saunders, what's your secret to your ability?"
"What do you like the most about being in high school knowing NHL has a seat waiting for you?"
All the questions, the comments... They were all too much for him. He was scared. He felt his lungs begin to get smaller and smaller and all he could do was be alone. He took a step back and slammed the door in the reporters' faces. As panic took over him, he began to pace around the locker room, looking for something to set him at ease. Looking down at his hand, Cam felt it again. That urge to hurt again, to feel pain because he could at least control it.
He sat down and grabbed his sharp ice skate. As tears began to well up in his eyes, he pressed it hard onto his hand, feeling it go through the wrap, then his skin. He flinched, clenching his eyes shut, and in that split second, he felt something else. Pathetic. Weak. Spineless. The lump in his throat is too big for him now. He tossed the skate to the side and lets himself sob.
Knowing the rest of the team had gotten all their stuff and are probably on the way to the bus right now, Cam cried even harder. He was alone so he could really let it out. At least, for that very moment.
He heard the door burst open and shut quickly, but he didn't even bother looking up.
"Kid, all those people are out there for you! Come on, man! get some glory while you can!" The voice he heard was Owen's.
Cam lifted his head up and looked at him. Owen frowned and furrowed his brow.
"Is it them?" he asked, motioning to the door. Cam nodded as tears fell down his cheeks. "Want me to get rid of em?"
"P-please...?"
Owen sighed and turned toward the door, opening it.
"Sorry guys. Superstar's under the weather. You're all gonna have to beat it."
"But wait, we have more questions."
"Here's one. Why are you all still here?" Owen snapped. They all then mumbled and walked away.
Owen shut the door and locked it. Since he drove there, he texted Dallas to go on ahead and have the bus leave. He knew he'd be here with him for a while. He pulled up one of the folding chairs and took a seat.
"Ok, superstar. What's your deal?" he asked. Cam could only look away in embarrassment. "Come on... Tell Owen what's wrong."
He smirked, it was kind of his catchphrase. But Cam still stayed quiet. His smile faded.
"Look, if you don't wanna talk..." he started, beginning to stand up. It was then when Cam looked at him, pain and hurt in his eyes.
"P-please don't leave me." he merely whimpered. "I have no one to talk to. I'm scared. I'm lonely."
Owen sighed. "Alright, alright, puppy dog."
Owen didn't exactly know what it was that made him want to help the poor kid. Normally, when someone cries around him, sometimes even girls, it gets awkward and he decides to leave the person be. But with Cam, he didn't know. Maybe it was a teammate thing... Yeah, that was it.
"What's the deal?"
"First... don't call me puppy dog. Ever. And two... I don't know what my deal is. I've just been upset for these past few weeks and I can't seem to figure out why." he looked up at Owen to see if he were even still sitting there. To his surprise, he was in full listen mode.
"Well... What do you think it is?" he asked.
"Um... I've been trying to not make it be the problem, but no matter how hard I try, everything always comes back to hockey. "
"Ok, so don't play hockey." he stated bluntly.
"You mean quit? Are you nuts?! Hockey has been my life for years! Not only that, Dallas would probably beat the PISS out of me."
"Dallas isn't touching anyone, Cam." he said, sounding a little more protective than he meant to. "If it makes you that upset, quit."
Cam eyed Owen suspiciously. He knew what he was trying to do. "Wow, Owen."
"….Huh?"
"Oh, cut the bullshit. I know what you're getting at! You don't want me here! Anything to get a higher spot on the team, right? You know, I actually trusted you. But you're just what everyone-"
Before Cam could finish, Owen got up and stormed out the door without a word.
'Shit.' Cam thought. There goes his only chance at being at least a little happier today. He couldn't let him get away though; Owen was also his ride home. He grabbed his stuff and ran after him.
"Wait!" he shouted as Owen got to his car. "Owen, wait! I'm sorry!"
His pleads fell on deaf ears as Owen got into the car, and swiftly drove off.
Cam sighed and sat down on the curb nearby. He wasn't crying, but he felt something wet on his face. He wiped it away, but then he felt another. Then another. Then another. He looked up and saw gray clouds brewing.
"Fucking perfect." he says to himself.
In only 5 minutes, it was pouring rain and all he could do was sit there and take it. Suddenly, a car pulled up in front of him. The car window rolled down and Owen's face showed.
"Get in." he said.
Cam gratefully packed his things in the back seat and sat in the front. "Thanks."
"Yeah whatever." he said rather coldly.
Owen was pissed, it was obvious. But Cam knew he had every right to be. Though he'd never admit it to save his own life, Owen's feelings were hurt. About 5 minutes into the drive, Cam spoke up.
"Look... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said all that." he said, looking down.
"Yeah, no kidding." he said.
"I just don't find a lot of people that care about me. People at Degrassi, the team... Dallas. Then once I find someone that does I push him away. I'm so stupid."
Owen sighed. "Maybe you are. But hey, after all the shit you heard about me, I probably wouldn't trust me either." he said. "What exactly have you heard...?"
"Well.. something about tossing people through doors and... raping some Indian girl."
Owen's face began to turn red. While he quickly flashed back to what happened with Adam, he didn't even know that people said he had actually raped Alli.
"Wow..." he started. "Don't believe anything you hear. I mean, yeah I'll admit to the first one, but I never raped anyone. I didn't even try either. I offered to pay, she accepted. Then she declined after going ALL the way to my locker and back. Sure I got pissed, but I wasn't going to fucking rape her."
Cam sighed. "Guess people at Degrassi don't like letting things go."
"Psh, understatement of the year." he said. "That place is a death trap."
And Cam, for the first time that day, smiled a little.
"So... do you think I should quit?"
"If it's what you want, then do so. Trust me, I'll keep the heat off you if anyone else gives you any. I don't want you hurting yourself anymore."
Cam nodded. "Thanks."
And then it hit him. His eyes widened. "Wait... What?"
"Cam, we all know." he said, looking at him. "I guess I'm the only one that gives enough of a shit about you to say something about it."
Cam looked down in shame. He bit his lip hard and fought the tears that threatened to fall. Owen, seeing this, shook his head.
"No nono. None of that here." But that only made Cam more upset. "Look, kid. Cry all you want. It's not gonna make anything better for you. And cutting yourself damn sure won't either. All this 'hockey's been my life' is just some bullshit front so people will accept you. Well guess what? It's time for you to start thinking about you and what makes YOU happy. You don't need everyone's approval if it's going to make you cry all the time. And if people don't like it, well fuck them. It's your life, not theirs, and you can do whatever pleases you with YOUR life. You're only gonna have it for so long."
Cam took a second to take all of that in. And after wiping his eyes, he realized that Owen was right. He's basically hated his life since he came to Degrassi for that stupid scholarship. While he didn't HAVE to go home after quitting, he figured he'd think about that along the road later.
They finally arrived at the billet home and Owen walked the smaller athlete to the front door.
"Take care, kiddo." he said, walking off as Cam walked inside. About halfway through the lawn, he heard the door open again.
"Did you forget something, little guy?" he asked.
Cam walked up to him and wrapped his arms tightly around his waist. Owen was taken WAY off guard.
Cam sniffled. "Thank you..." he said. "You're a good guy, Owen."
And Owen wrapped an arm around him as well.
