Girl Talk

Harmony looked up from her magazine. The blue thing, the one that killed Fred was staring at her from the other side of the desk. Harmony stared back. After about ten seconds she said, "Can I help you?"

"I'm trying to understand your function."

"I'm Angel's personal assistant. I answer his calls, bring him blood, make his appointments. I keep his life running smooth."

"You have sworn fealty to him?"

"If that's what I think it is, no. I'm an employee, not a minion. That means I get to punch out at the end of the day. And I get paid." Harmony moved restlessly in her chair. "Even when he's out of the office and I'm here trying to get some quiet time for myself. Shouldn't you be with Wesley?"

Illyria tilted her head slightly, studying Harmony. 'Wesley is occupied and I need to know more about this world. I must observe its various creatures and their lives. Information is power."

"Well, my life ended when I was in high school. But I know a lot about that. High school."

Illyria looked dubious. "You were a child then? Are children of any importance?"

"I wasn't a child. I was a teenager. It's different. There's a whole lot of difference. It was complicated, my life; I was in the best circle, the one everybody looked up to. It was very stressful at times. I mean, just choosing an outfit every morning could take an hour and two or three phone calls"

Illyria looked down to her own body covering. "I see elaborate outer garments worn by many in this building. They would not be suitable for fighting, only serving to hobble the bearer."

"Well, it's not all about battles in this...realm; you may have noticed that, too. If you're going to live here, you better start thinking about clothes." Harmony gave a theatrical sigh, "Obviously, you're serious about this questions stuff and aren't going to let me alone. The phones are already on message mode, so we might as well go to the break room and I'll have a cup of blood and tell you about things."

When they got there and settled at a table Harmony launched into a description of high school life. How she was a trend-setter and decided for the whole of the school, especially in her senior year, what was "cool" and what wasn't.

(There was a small digression from the story as Harmony answered Illyria's question as to what "cool" meant. After a few frustrating minutes Harmony said in a closing-the-subject voice, "It's like being queen and you decide what people wear. You don't get to behead them or anything if they don't wear the right things, but you get to make fun of them. And not talk to them."

"They are banished from your court? From the inner circle?"

"Exactly!")

Harmony continued, "Me and my best friend, Cordelia, held everything, well, everything that mattered, together. Like what the theme of the school dances would be and when she'd be crowned at them. And we'd coordinate our dresses and shoes. Then Cordelia sort of went crazy and started dating Xander Harris, and I had to take up even more responsibility. It was such a shame that she wasted all that time on him. I really think it affected her fashion sense. You should ask Wesley about Cordy; he knew her." Harmony was quiet for a few seconds. "Though that's probably not a good idea, with him being so sad about Fred. Cordelia's dead, too."

"I can not see that this trivial power jockeying is of any use," Illyria said while Harmony stopped to take a drink from her cup of warm blood.

"If you're king of the world, like you used to be, it probably wouldn't be. I mean, what would you care? But ordinary people have to fight for status all the time. Like here, at Wolfram & Hart, all the girls hate me because I'm the boss' secretary. That's something they want to be. Everyday is a war zone."

"The shell I exist in, Fred, she did not feel that way about you. I do not sense any residue of antagonism."

Harmony leaned forward in enthusiasm. "Oh, Fred and me were totally almost friends. We went out for drinks after work. Well, not all the time, but twice."

"And this would form a bond? You would be allies, then? In my world this would mean less than nothing. Kinship, blood oaths, a common foe, those are the things that are binding."

"Uh-huh. Fred and I had a few margaritas and went out shopping, pretty much the same diff. God, I really miss her. I mean, I guess it's great for you, being here and all, even though Angel tells me the whole kingdom thing is dust, but Fred was nice, you know." Harmony gestured with her hands to encompass a large amount of "nice".

"No," said Illyria, "I do not see you and I forming any alliance similar to the one you had with the shell. I sense deep memories and feelings Fred had for Wesley and Angel and Charles but for you, I can draw on nothing."

"That's kind of funny, really. Funny, strange; not funny, ha, ha, 'cause we really had fun together, shopping."

They sat in silence for a full minute.

Then Harmony said, "So I was telling you about high school. It was great and all and I had big plans for afterward. Maybe a fashion career or something in France." She looked at Illyria, hesitated, then said, "That's another place. Even farther away then New York." Illyria nodded slightly. "But nothing like that happen, after high school, 'cause there was this big fight at graduation and I got bitten. By some boy who always had a crush on me."

"Crush?"

"He liked me. He worked after school at his family's ice cream place and he always gave me free cones, if his father wasn't there."

"Did he see this as a gift to you? To make you a half-breed with eternal life?"

"I don't think so. I mean, he probably didn't think about me that much, just himself. That's what boys do. He would think that now we'd hook up or something 'cause we were both vampires. But he must have gotten staked, because by the time I came to, you know, back from the dead, he wasn't around. Like I'd have time for him even if he was my sire!"

"He was not worthy to mate with?"

"Oh, please! He was a sophomore. And a dork." Harmony glanced at the wall clock and gave a little squeal. "I've got to get back to my desk. Angel likes me to be there when he is. He never knows what he's supposed to do, or see next. So, bye and maybe we can do this again."

The next day Harmony was at her desk when Illyria approached, carrying a small black paper bag. She reached over the counter to place in front of Harmony saying, "I have searched the box of the shell's, Fred's, belongings that Wesley has in his rooms. I wished to familiarize myself with her. Wesley is devoted to her, even now; I wished to know why." She stopped and seemed to be thinking.

"Uh-huh," Harmony said, uncertainly.

Illyria focused on her again. "These articles were in the box. Perhaps they would have meaning to you. Wesley tells me that females here crave them."

Harmony took the bag, saying, "It's from 'Sephora', the place Fred and me went after we had our drinks. We tried on all kinds of stuff." She looked inside it. "Oh, wow, this is all the lipstick and polish she bought. I helped her pick out the colors. She probably never got a chance..."

Illyria said, "They are yours. Wesley has no objection. You helped to break the boredom of my day with your chatter. Like an amusing toy." Illyria then turned sharply and stalked away.

Harmony spilled out the contents of the bag and picked through them. Then her mouth formed a small frown as she realized that the colors were all wrong for her. They were for a brunette. Oh, rats! . But wait! She was going to live forever; she might get tired of being a blonde someday. You never know. She put everything back in the bag and tucked it away in her purse. She spent the rest of the day daydreaming off and on about how she'd look in a really super brown wig.