Kitty Kanda
Komui gives Kanda an experimental drug that turns him into a cat. Hilarity ensues.
"Kanda. You've been doing missions non-stop lately." Komui spoke up after calling the samurai exorcist to his office. "I've called you here to ask you to take a break."
Kanda snorted. "I don't need a break. Just give me the next assignment."
Komui sighed and nodded. He held out a file. "Here, look this over." He paused and suddenly offered Kanda some tea. "Here, have some tea. It should help you relax."
Kanda eyed the cup suspiciously but decided even Komui wouldn't drug his tea. He accepted it and took a long drink from it. He took the file from Komui, flipping it open and looking it over. It seemed like a fairly simple mission, he didn't understand why Komui was giving him so much grief over resting. Sure, he hadn't slept in over 36 hours but that was nothing he couldn't handle. He looked up at Komui. "I'll be ready in an hour."
Komui handed him another cup of tea. "Drink this and then go get ready."
Kanda accepted the cup without suspicion. Komui hadn't drugged his last cup of tea. Why should he worry about this one? He gulped it down and winced. It had a strange after taste. He glanced at Komui but he was already being hassled to complete more paperwork. He didn't notice the sly grin Komui flashed when he saw Kanda's cup was indeed empty. He shooed him away, still talking to Reever and giving him excuses as to why he shouldn't work. Kanda left without a worry, assuming he would soon be on his mission and this incident would be behind him.
15 minutes later…
"Gah!" Lavi pointed at Kanda, who had shrunk in size and had suddenly gained a pair of cat ears and a cat's tail. "Wha-wha-what the hell?"
"What's the mat…ter?" Allen began, happening to pass by. He paused and leaned back to get a better look only to trail off when he was what Lavi was pointing at. "Komui. He definitely has something to do with this, doesn't he?" They both darkened at this thought.
Lavi approached Kanda, who looked up at him. "Ya know, he's kinda cute like this…"
"Don't even think about it." Allen shook his head, backing up. "He's still Kanda, no matter what he looks like. He'll kill you when he returns back to normal, if you try anything now."
"Th-that's true…" Lavi agreed, reaching a hand out to Kanda.
Kanda the cat glared at him and turned away, snubbing the redhead. Lavi hesitantly began to rub his head. "His…His hair is soft." Lavi gasped in wonder. Kanda sat there for a minute before he began to purr. Lavi kneeled down and began to rub lower, touching his neck. Kanda purred louder. Lavi moved down but suddenly a hand reached out and grabbed his hand away.
"What are you doing?" Allen hissed, looking pissed. "Stop that!"
"Why? 're ya jealous?" Lavi teased.
"Because it's not right!" Allen snapped. "Even if he looks like this, he's still Kanda! Don't patronize him! It's humiliating."
"Humiliating?" Lavi laughed, trying to pull his hand away. "How is it humiliating? Cats like…"
Allen flung his hand away, "He's not a cat! He's Kanda! He's your best friend! Would you treat your best friend the way you are now? Would you like it if he treated you this way?"
Lavi stared at Allen in shock. Slowly his words sunk in. He looked at Kanda the cat, who was staring curiously at them both. Shame and guilt hit him hard. He'd been on the wrong end of Komui's experiments more than once and he hated feeling like a freak. Worse still was the treatment. Allen was right; he couldn't treat Kanda in such a disrespectful way. Allen patted his shoulder and Lavi looked up at him. Allen smiled at him. "It's fine. Just remember this feeling. I hated it when you all made fun of me when Komui turned me into a piglet. I can imagine how Kanda's feeling right now."
"We—I never made fun of ya, Allen!" Lavi protested.
"It felt like it when you kept treating me like a pig. It felt horrible afterwards, waking up with all those memories." Allen smiled at him. "It's fine now. I don't mind. I just don't want to be on Kanda's bad side, ne?"
Lavi smiled warily. "Yeah, that'd be bad."
"Meow." Kanda looked up at them expectantly.
Allen looked down at him. "I think he's hungry. If you're hungry, follow me, Kanda." Allen turned and began heading for the door. Amazingly, Kanda followed him. Weirdly enough, he was walking on his hands and knees. Allen looked back and sighed. He turned and walked back to Kanda. He picked the cat-like exorcist up, cradling him in his arms like a child. "I'm not doing this to patronize you, Kanda. I just don't want to hear about how your hands and knees hurt when you turn back."
Lavi chuckled as he watched the two leave. Allen really did look after Kanda. Moreover, for all of Kanda's hostility, his cat version seemed to like Allen. After staring at him for a minute, he began rubbing his head against Allen's neck and purring. It was an adorable sight. Lavi wondered vaguely why Kanda always acted as if he hated Allen when he actually didn't.
Allen cradled Kanda in his arms, trying to ignore him as he nuzzled his neck. It really was a distracting feeling. Lavi was right, though. Kanda's hair did feel soft. Allen tried to hide his flushing cheeks, thinking instead of the glaring Kanda. The effect was immediate. The warm, fuzzy feeling that kitty Kanda had on him dissipating. He didn't have the normal irritation toward Kanda, but he still felt wary. Kanda purred in his ear and continued rubbing his head against Allen's neck. Lenalee walked toward them, chatting with Johnny and Reever. They hadn't spotted him yet. He quickly ducked into a nearby corridor. He could just hear the teasing now and Kanda would kill him before either of them could live it down. He waited until they passed by before quietly sneaking out. He again headed for the cafeteria.
"Allen?" Allen cringed as he heard Lenalee call out to him. Slowly, he turned around, Kanda still in his arms.
Lenalee, Reever and Johnny were all staring at him. Kanda continued nuzzling him, purring. "Um, Komui." Allen gave by way of explanation. He noticed Johnny and Reever shudder and suddenly felt sorry for the two of them. "I was just…going to the cafeteria. Kanda, I think he's hungry."
"I see." Lenalee nodded, staring at Kanda. Kanda, as though feeling eyes upon him, stopped rubbing Allen's neck to eye the three of them curiously. After a moment, he smiled at them. He actually smiled. Then Kanda looked up at Allen. "Meow." He batted a curled hand at Allen's face. "Meow."
"I know, I know." Allen sighed, turning. "You're hungry. I get it. Let's go see if we can give you something to eat. I'm sure Jerry can whip something up that you'll like."
"Meow."
Allen continued on his way, still talking to kitty Kanda. "Yes, yes. We're moving now. See? We're almost to the cafeteria."
"I didn't know Allen-kun was so close to Kanda-san." Johnny commented.
Reever watched them go and shrugged. "Well, that's none of our business. Right now, what's most important is finding your brother, Lenalee. Do you have any idea where he could be?"
Lenalee shook her head, sweat dropping. "Sorry. I have no idea where Nii-san is. Did you check the cafeteria yet?"
In the cafeteria, Allen tried to dodge questions by heading for the kitchen. He managed to get inside without anyone stopping him. He looked around for Jerry. There! There he was, preparing some food, talking to—Komui! Allen's expression darkened and he felt Kanda tense in his arms in reaction to his darkening mood. Allen stomped over to Komui and grabbed his shoulder, whirling him around. He pointed to Kanda who was hissing in his arms. "Change him back. Now."
"Al-Allen-kun. Wha-what a surprise." Komui stuttered. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
Allen held Kanda out to Komui, the former trying to attack the later. "Are you sure about that? Change him back. Now."
"I-I-I can't. Believe me, if I could, I would. However, it's an experiment on time. I don't know when it will wear off." Komui replied.
Allen glared at him but returned kitty Kanda to his arms, cradling him like a child again. Ignoring Komui, he turned to Jerry. "Jerry, could I use some cream? Or something good for cats? I hear regular milk isn't good for cats so…"
"Oh, don't worry about that, Allen-kun!" Komui laughed. "He can still eat normal food. He just acts like a cat. No harm done!"
Allen held out Kanda toward Komui again. Kanda tried to scratch him, hissing angrily. "I think he disagrees." Komui cringed away.
Jerry cut in. "Of course you can get some milk or cream for your friend, Allen-kun! Take as much as you need! Would you like me to fix you anything?"
Allen thought for a moment before nodding. "Yeah, a small lunch. Twenty-five meat pies, dry curry, ma-po tofu and a large helping of beef stew." Allen began, listing his 'small' lunch. "And for dessert, vanilla pudding and thirty dango." He finished. "Oh, and some sushi. Just a little bit."
"Sushi. Are you sure?" Jerry asked, surprised. Allen didn't usually eat sushi.
"Yeah. I think Kanda might like sushi." Allen replied. Kanda was back to rubbing Allen's neck and purring. He stopped for a moment to look up at Allen.
"Meow."
Allen turned away and headed for the fridge. "I'm getting some cream for Kanda now." Allen told them, opening it with one hand, carefully balancing Kanda in his other arm.
"Okay." Jerry watched as Allen set the cream on the counter. He closed the refrigerator door and began rummaging around in the cabinets. He went through several cabinets before he found a small, shallow bowl. He poured some cream in the bowl and set Kanda on the counter in front of the bowl. Kanda sat on his knees and leaned over the bowl, lapping it up with his tongue. Allen sighed and flopped on the ground.
"Allen? I can bring your food outside if you'd rather wait…" Began Jerry but Allen shook his head.
"No, we'll eat in here. If we try to eat out there, we'll never get any peace." He exhaled, leaning back. "I'll try to stay out of your way. Sorry to intrude."
Kanda placed his hands on either side of the bowl, trying to lick the last of the cream up. The bowl tilted and some cream splashed over the cat-like exorcist. Allen got to his feet in an instant. He picked up kitty Kanda and lifted him off the counter. He found a towel and quickly began wiping down Kanda's clothes. Kanda, on the other hand, was licking his hands clean. He looked almost sexy, licking like that. The other people in the kitchen watched in fascination. Allen ignored his licking, though, still cleaning up the exorcist.
Allen had finished cleaning Kanda up as much as he could by the time Jerry finished their food seven minutes later. He placed the sushi in front of Kanda who began eating it with gusto. Allen turned to his own meal and began eating it with just as much zest. He'd glance over at Kanda occasionally. Kanda finished first and yawned widely, curling up on the counter and going to sleep. Allen continued eating his meal until he was polishing off the last ten dango. He walked over to Kanda and shook the cat-like exorcist slightly. Kanda stretched and yawned widely, blinking at Allen. Allen poured him some more cream in the small, shallow bowl again. He was leaning on the counter, finishing off the last three dango when Kanda spilled the bowl again—all over Allen this time. Allen jumped back in surprise as cold cream splashed on his chest and pants, slipping on the cream that spilt on the floor. He landed on his rear and Kanda jumped down.
Kanda crawled over to where Allen was and began licking his clothes. Allen tried to push away kitty Kanda, giggling as he brushed against one of his ticklish spots on his sides. However, he insistently continued pushing against Allen's hands, licking his chest and slowly moving down. When Kanda made to lick his pants, Allen had had enough. He picked up the cat exorcist and stormed out of the kitchen, passing Reever on his way out. He heard the man give a shout, something along the lines of 'I've found you Supervisor' as he continued on his way. Kitty Kanda was content with snuggling in Allen's chest and purring. Poor Allen, on the other hand, was having a hard time trying not to be upset with the cat-like exorcist. He carried Kanda through the cafeteria and through the hallways until he reached his room. He threw his door open and stormed inside, heading for the bathroom. "You made a mess of both our clothes, Kanda." Allen sighed, not bothering to close the door. "Looks like I'm going to have to rinse you off in your clothes before you can take a bath."
Kanda was not happy being placed in the bathtub. He was even more unhappy when Allen turned the water on. He actually hissed when Allen began trying to rinse him down. He tried to claw at Allen, attempting to latch onto his arm and climb out of the bathtub. Allen pushed him back into the tub and continued rinsing him off until his clothes were no longer stained with cream. He then shut the water off and stood, turning around. "You can take your clothes off and bathe now." Allen called over his shoulder, stepping out of the bathroom.
Kanda watched him go, soaking wet. He regarded his soggy clothes and his soaking wet hair. He shook his head, sending water flying in every direction. Satisfied, he pulled the cold, clingy cloth off his body. He shook his whole body again and began licking his arm, lapping up the water. Like a cat, he didn't seem to get the concept of bathing with water. However, Allen wasn't about to watch him bathe and he certainly wasn't going to stop from licking himself "clean." After ten minutes, Allen came back into the bathroom. He was no longer wearing his vest or his tie string around his neck. Instead, his shirt was unbuttoned and hung loosely open around him. He picked up Kanda and carried him out of the bathroom. He'd shut the door at some point and a set of small clothes were placed on the bed. Allen placed Kanda on the bed, next to the clothes. "Get dressed in these. I borrowed them from Bookman. They should fit. Now, stay here. I'll be out soon enough."
Allen turned, shedding his shirt as he did so. For the first time, Kanda got a good look at Allen's bare back. Surprisingly, there was a faint but large burn scar across his back, at a downward angle diagonal from left to right. Kitty Kanda stared at his back in fascination. Allen tossed his shirt in a pile by the door of the bathroom. He walked into the bathroom and shut the door. Moments later, he cracked it open and dropped his pants in the pile, along with Kanda's soggy clothes. He again shut the door and there was a click. Kitty Kanda looked around, his eyes settling on the clothes. He dressed himself, feeling slightly cold. The clothes clung a bit to his still damp skin but this was more tolerable than the soggy wet clothes that he'd had trouble taking off. The water turned on in the bathroom and for a moment, the sound held kitty Kanda's attention. Then he was looking around again, in search of some new form of entertainment. Finding none, he curled up in a ball and went to sleep on the bed.
10 minutes later...
When Allen exited the bathroom still drying his hair with a towel, he was only slightly surprised to find Kanda curled up, asleep on his bed. Kanda shivered and Allen walked over to his closet. He pulled down a light blanket from the top shelf in his closet and unfurled it, draping it over the small cat. He sat on the bed, staring at his sleeping form several minutes. Sighing, Allen looked around. There was laundry to do. Both his clothes and Kanda's clothes had to be washed. He gathered up the clothes and with one last look at the sleeping form of the sleeping child-like form of his former rival, he walked to the door and opened it. He stepped out and shut the door firmly behind him. He hoped Kanda couldn't open doors. It would be terrible looking for him if the cat-like exorcist became lost in the Black Order. Heading for the washroom, Allen pondered how strange life could be.
Two and a half hours later...
When kitty Kanda awoke, it was dark outside. He yawned and stretched, arching his back the way most cats do. He looked around the room passively. Something felt off to him. He jumped down from the bed and crawled over to the bathroom door. He stretched out a hand to scratch the door, intending on calling his new "owner" only to jump in surprise when the door creaked open. It was dark inside the bathroom and there was no presence inside it. He looked around the room. He was alone. Trapped in this room alone. He began to cry like a cat, looking around for any sign of help. The door to the room opened and a familiar head popped in. "So this is where you've been hiding~!" Kitty Kanda backed up a couple paces, wary of the figure.
Allen returned to his room later than he expected. It had taken longer to wash the cream stains out of his uniform than he expected. Unlike Kanda's small clothes, his larger clothes were covered in the cream. Moreover, it had time to set in his clothes whereas he'd rinsed Kanda's clothes immediately. He was tired of scrubbing his clothes clean. Now he carried the wet clothes back to his room to hang up to dry in his room. He really wanted to go to sleep and pretend this day never happened. He opened the door to his room and turned on the light. The wet clothes in his arms dropped to the floor. Kanda was nowhere in sight. He ran to the bathroom and then to the closet. No luck. He was gone.
With Lavi and Kanda
Lavi, on the other hand, was trying to dress Kanda in a lolicon outfit. Kanda was resisting his efforts as best as he could. He swiped and batted at Lavi's face, scratched and bit his arms and hands. It was no use, however. The exorcist was bigger and stronger than he was. Lavi quickly undressed Kanda and was slipping a skirt on him when Kanda began to meow in protest. He tried to get away and almost succeeded several times. Lavi only grabbed him and picked him up again, trying to dress him up in a French maid outfit. Kanda continued to meow in protest. The door was flung open several moments later and Lavi was sent flying with a powerful kick.
"YOU IDIOT APPRENTICE!" Bookman cried. "What are you doing? You were supposed to be in the library, helping me research an hour ago!"
"Meow. Meow." Kanda cried in protest, batting at the clothes forced on him with his curled hand.
"What is this?" Bookman pointed at the scantily clad cat-like exorcist. "I heard from Allen he'd shrunk in size when he asked to borrow some of my clothes. How did that become this?"
"Meow. Meow." Kanda cried pitifully. "Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow."
"Kanda? Kanda, where are you?" a familiar voice called, proceeding the running footsteps heading their way. "Kanda!"
"Meow, meow!" Kanda cried. "Meow! Meow!"
"Kanda?" Allen appeared in the doorway, panting and clothes disheveled. He had broken out in a sweat and his hair was completely mussed up. "Kanda?" He walked over to the exorcist and leaned down, picking him up. "What in the world are you wearing?" He looked up in confusion, looking first from Bookman then to Lavi.
Bookman glared at Lavi. "I have no idea what's going on. I came to fetch my idiot apprentice and this is what I found."
Allen cradled Kanda in his arms, hugging him to his chest protectively as though he were his child. "Lavi?"
Lavi flinched at the tone Allen used. He could hear the disappointment, accusation, and outrage in the other's voice. He looked away, not ready to admit he was wrong. "Meow. Meow." Kanda called, clinging to Allen.
"I know. I'll get you out of these clothes now." Allen told him. He turned to Bookman. "I hate to ask but can I borrow another set of clothes? I don't know what happened to the last set."
Bookman nodded, not taking his eyes off Lavi. "Sure, in the closet."
"Thanks." Allen immediately began undressing Kanda, throwing the garter belt and the garters in the air. He squeezed the skirt off Kanda and pulled off the stockings, causing a run in one when he yanked a little too hard. He handed Kanda a pair of Bookman's pants, allowing him to put them on himself. He handed him a shirt next. Once Kanda was fully dressed again, he stretched in a cat-like away and looked up expectantly at Allen.
"Meow." He told Allen. "Meow."
Allen chuckled and reached down, picking up Kanda. "Are you hungry again? You're in luck. I was just thinking of getting some dinner myself."
Kanda nuzzled his chest and purred softly, snuggling in Allen's arms. Allen carried him out of the room, smiling softly. There was softness in his eyes Lavi had never seen before. Lavi looked down at the ground where the clothes were scattered and then back up at Allen's retreating form as he left the room. To his immense surprise, Kanda stretched his neck and licked Allen's cheek. Allen blushed and laughed softly. "You're very welcome. And thank you."
About half an hour later...
After having a light meal with kitty Kanda, Allen was returning to his room when a thought occurred to him. Perhaps Kanda would like to sleep in his own room tonight. He paused, not certain whether he should return to his own room or go to Kanda's room. Kanda yawned widely in his arms and snuggled down his arms. Allen decided he would drop Kanda off in his own room. He would be more comfortable in his own room, after all. He turned and walked back to the hallway that turned into the area where Kanda's room was. Allen had only been there once, with Lenalee, when Kanda had caught a cold. He came across the room and sighed in relief. He still knew the way.
Kanda looked up expectantly at Allen at the sight of his room. Allen smiled down at the cat-like exorcist. "Don't worry; you're going to sleep here tonight. It'll be more comfortable being in your own room, ne?" Kanda just snuggled down in his arms and meowed. Allen took this as a 'go ahead' to open the door. He opened the door and walked into the dark room. He flipped on the light and blinked as the brightness blinded him for a moment. He looked around, his first time being in Kanda's room. He'd stood outside while Lenalee visited him, afraid that his rival's condition would worsen if they started fighting. Kanda stretched in his arms and jumped down, crawling around the room. He looked around and yawned, jumping up on the bed. He curled up in a ball and lay there, watching Allen through half-closed eyes.
Once Allen assumed that Kanda was properly settled, he took one last look around. He turned around and headed for the door. "Meow! Meow, meow." A startled meow caught him off guard and Allen whirled around. Kanda was sitting up on the bed, clearly upset about something.
"What's wrong? What's the matter?"
"Meow. Meow." Kanda responded. Allen sighed and walked over to the cat. He sat on the bed and Kanda climbed on his lap. He looked down at the cat-like exorcist, who was busy trying to nudge his hand. He lifted his hand and Kanda rubbed his hand with his head. Allen hesitantly began to pet him, stopping just before his neck. "You want me to pet you? Are you sure?" Kanda just purred in response.
Allen pet Kanda until his eyes drifted closed. He picked up the cat and placed him towards the head of the bed. He looked in Kanda's closet and found a small, thin blanket. He took it out and draped it over him. Kanda looked up and then closed his eyes. When Allen turned and began heading for the door, the protesting cat stopped him yet again. Allen turned to Kanda, who was sitting up again and looking panicked. A thought dawned on him and he returned to the bed. "Do you want me to stay with you? Is that it? You don't want me to leave."
"Meow." Kanda replied, placing a curled hand on Allen's leg as though trying to tell him to stay.
"Well, where am I going to sleep? I don't mind staying if you want me to but…" Kanda tapped his chest, trying to push him back. "You want me to sleep on the bed. Where will you sleep then?" Kanda gave him a look that clearly said he was an idiot. "You want me to sleep on the bed with you? Are you sure?"
"Meow."
Allen regarded Kanda but he was already curling up on the pillow. Allen sighed and removed his boots. It looked like it was going to be a long night. He scooted to the very edge of the bed, letting Kanda have his position closest to the door, and lay down. He stared at the ceiling for a moment before turning his head. Kanda was staring at him. He snorted and wrapped the blanket around the small exorcist before lying down again. He lay there, staring at Kanda, waiting for the cat to go to sleep. Kanda just stared back at him. Allen's eyelids began to feel heavy and he thought it would be okay to rest his eyes, just for a moment. He closed them, falling asleep seconds later. Kanda watched him for a couple more minutes before getting up. He walked over to the sleeping exorcist and nuzzled his arms, making a place for him to sleep. Warmer than under the blanket, the content cat went to sleep.
