I am diligently tying the last knot on my snare when an arrow shoots past me and lands inches from my right hand.
I whip around and glare at my hunting partner.
"Not funny." I mutter, but I can't stay irritated for long, because she's laughing. She is so beautiful when she laughs.
Even when Katniss's laughter subsides, her amusement is still visible.
"You should have seen your face!" She remarks happily. I roll my eyes at her.
"Oh Catnip, what did I ever do to you?" I ask.
She smiles brightly at me and starts walking in the direction of the next snare.
This is the only time she ever smiles. Out here, in the woods, with me.
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As I head to the Hob to trade some rabbit skin to trade for some soap for my mother, I notice my friend Thom in the alley making out with some girl. I consider calling his name, just to irritate him. That's when I notice, it's not just some girl. It's Katniss.
My mind instantly goes blank.
I blink a couple of times, willing this to be a hallucination. But no, Thom is pressing Katniss up against a wall and kissing her neck, as she moans. This couldn't be happening. Thom isn't a guy that would take advantage of a girl, but Katniss wasn't interested in romantic relationships. Right? I have to stop him. I have to protect Katniss. I have already taken a couple steps towards them when I hear Thom's husky voice.
"Is this okay?"
And then Katniss's breathless melodic voice.
"Oh! This is more than okay, Thom!"
Then she giggles. Giggles! My heart clenches uncomfortably. Katniss never giggles in front of me. Laughs at my expense? Definitely. Giggles? Never.
That's when I realize, Katniss probably doesn't want me to help her. She doesn't need me. I want to punch the brick wall.
I walk away before either of them notices me.
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If I thought it couldn't get any worse. I was wrong.
I am at my locker at school, when I overhear two girls from Katniss's grade talking.
"Did you hear about Katniss and Thom?"
"Who's Thom?"
"The extremely good-looking guy from two grades up? Gale's friend?"
"Oh, him?"
"Yeah, apparently he and and Katniss were making out in the alley yesterday, Lina Paltrow saw them."
"No way!"
"Katniss is so lucky."
"I know..."
Their words are like daggers twisting in my heart. I try to convince myself that Katniss will eventually get over Thom and realize she belongs to me. That I love her.
I've known that I loved her for a long time now. There have been plenty of times that I could have admitted my feelings. Her insistence on her refusal to love caused me to bide my time and trap my feelings for her within. I just didn't want to lose the secure friendship we had. I thought she would eventually refute her reservations to love, and fall in love. With me. Her hunting partner. Her best friend. If only I hadn't been such a coward and told her sooner...
Later that day, when I'm changing in the guys' locker room for gym, I overhear another conversation.
"Thom lucked out."
"She's hot!"
"And did you see that ass?"
Then,
"Do you think Hawthorne is jealous?"
-laughter-
I takes all of my self control not to slam my locker door in frustration.
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The next day, Katniss shows up late and breathless to our rock to hunt.
"I'm so sorry I'm late, Gale! I overslept." She doubles over panting.
I try not to seem irked but I can't help it.
"Had too much fun with Thom last night?" I inquire angrily.
"So what if I was? Why are you so upset anyways? It's not like showing up a few minutes late is a big deal." Katniss is annoyed.
The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them.
"I don't think Thom is right for you."
Katniss's mouth falls open.
"I'm sorry Gale, but you're not my father, and you're not my brother. I don't care if you don't think Thom's right for me. I can make my own decisions. Besides, you've been with plenty of girls yourself. I've never liked any of them, but I keep my opinions to myself. I heard you take a new girl to the slag heap every week. Think of that, before you tell me you disapprove of my boyfriend."
She huffs impatiently.
"I think I'll hunt by myself today. Don't bother looking for me."
I gape at her back as she walks away.
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That evening, I lie on my bed and stare at the crack in the ceiling and wallow in my sorrows. What did Katniss see in Thom that I couldn't offer? We had been best friends for five whole years. How can she just throw our friendship away for some other guy she barely even knows?
Her words replay in my head over and over.
"You've been with plenty of girls yourself. I've never liked any of them, but I keep my opinions to myself."
"I heard you take a new girl to the slag heap every week."
"But you see, Catnip, I only hung out with those girls to make you jealous!" I mutter under my breath.
I violently flip over onto my stomach a sink my face deep into my pillow wishing that everything would just go away.
I lie like this for what seems like an eternity when I hear the door to my room quietly creaking open. The firm but hesitant footsteps tell me it is my mother. She stands next to my bed for a moment before sitting down on the edge. She soothingly strokes my back, and to my surprise, calms me down.
Eventually, I sit up. My mother immediately wraps her arms around me.
"Look Gale," She says softly. "I know you don't often tell me what is bothering you, but I want you to know that I will always listen."
I open my mouth, and suddenly everything is pouring out. My love for Katniss, how she started dating Thom, how jealous I am, how I can't do anything about it, how unfair it all is.
My mother listens quietly, nodding occasionally, signaling that she is paying attention. When I finish, her arms squeeze me a little tighter and she kisses my cheek.
"It seems to me, dear son, that you love this girl very much." She remarks eventually.
"I do mother, really." I answer, sighing sadly.
"My father told me once that if a relationship is meant to be, there will be an opportunity for it to happen. You just have to patiently wait for it, and when it comes, you take it." I nod dutifully.
"Of course, mother."
"I love you, Gale, no matter what happens." She kisses my forehead and quietly walks out of the room closing the door behind her.
I fall easily into a dreamless sleep.
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My mother's continuous insisting eventually convinces me to suck up my pride and apologize to Katniss.
As I walk purposefully towards her house, a path that I had not taken in the past two weeks, I cannot help but realize exactly how much I had missed my Catnip during this time.
I imagine her throwing her perfectly toned arms around me as she forgave me for my selfishness after I apologized. How she would promise that nothing would ever drive us apart again. Of course she would forgive me. We were best friends. We were inseparable.
As I near her house, I notice two figures in the front porch, locked in a passionate embrace. After taking a few more steps, I freeze. The figures are Thom and Katniss. The freezing tendrils of jealousy grips my heart. I am shaking.
What does it matter? I tell myself. I should just go up to them and ask if I could talk to Katniss in private. I have let Thom drive us apart long enough.
I take a few steps towards them, when I freeze again. I hear Catnip's voice.
"Oh, Thom!"
She never uses that voice with me.
"You're so sweet and compassionate. You know, I trust you more than anyone!"
What?! How about me? Her hunting partner. Her best friend.
She lets out a contented sigh.
"I love you, Thom-"
No... No. No. No. No. No.
"-of course I will marry you!"
I run away as fast and far as I can. It is only when I am deep in the woods, no idea where I am, when I slide to the base of a tree trunk and start to cry silent tears of agony.
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When I return home the following morning covered in leaves and my eyes red and swollen, my mother hugs me tightly but does not comment about my disheveled state.
She does not bother me about apologizing to Katniss again.
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The news of the engagement spreads like wildfire throughout the gossipy district.
To my annoyance I was smothered with sympathetic glances wherever I went. I tried not to openly display my irritation at this. Eventually I realized that I was embarrassed about the fact that I could have just about any girl in the District except the one I was in love with.
I did not appreciate how everyone treated me like I was extremely fragile and would disintegrate into smithereens at the slightest provocation.
To my surprise, the baker was one of my sympathizers.
"I'm sorry Gale," He had said compassionately. "I know how difficult this must be for you."
I had snatched the loaf of bread he was offering in exchange for the two squirrels I brought him, and walked away without answering.
As if.
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As I am exiting the Hob one night after a particularly difficult day of haggling, I run right into none other than Katniss Everdeen.
Saying it was awkward would be an understatement.
"Gale! I haven't seen you in a while..." She says unsteadily after a long period of silence. I give an uncommitted grunt.
"I've missed you." She tries again.
I push past her and start walking through the dark street in the direction of my house.
I ignore her as she calls after me.
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I am at the market, buying some salt to preserve some meat for the upcoming winter, when I overhear two merchant girls gossiping.
"Did you hear?"
"Hear what?"
"The Katniss girl dumped Thom."
"No way!"
"I know! They were engaged and everything!"
"She didn't deserve him anyways."
But I already wasn't listening. My thoughts were racing.
Katniss dumped Thom.
She dumped him!
That's my Catnip.
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I am retrieving a rabbit from one of my snares, when I hear a twig snap. I practically fly five feet in the air.
I whip my head around, and see Katniss. She is standing a small distance away from me, and gazing at me hesitantly and apologetically.
"Look Gale," she says quietly, "I know we haven't talked much lately, and I've been, quite frankly, a heartless bitch and a terrible friend this past month." She sighs.
"I have really missed you, Gale. I know I don't deserve it, but I was hoping you could forgive me." Her hopeful expression is so endearing, I can barely stand it.
We are enveloped in silence again.
"Why did you break up with him?" I inquire eventually.
"I realized I was in love with someone else." She answers quietly.
"And who would that be?" I ask gruffly, looking at her expectantly.
She bites her lip nervously. I'm about to ask what's wrong, when she kisses me.
It's a deep, passionate kiss that makes my heart pound and head spin. My arms ensnare her as we pour our hearts and souls and desires into our frantic and hungry kisses.
When we eventually, reluctantly, are forced break apart in order to breathe, we are still locked in our tight embrace. I don't think I will ever want to let her go.
Her stormy grey eyes filled with love tell me she doesn't either.
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