*I got this Idea from 40 ways to tick off the marauders on Youtube.

*I do not own Harry Potter.

Snape's Cousin Visit of DOOM!

Take's place after Snape gets hung upside down and proceeds to call Lily a Mudblood, after she tries to help him.

Severus Snape was hiding in an alcove near the owlery furiously writing to his female cousin Jess for advice.

Dear Jess,

Hi! Um...how should I say this? Your cousin (me) is a complete idiot. I...was being picked on by the marauders again. They hung me upside down, and well I was wearing my old clothes. My Father had burned my new ones I got last year and well I didn't have the time or money to replace them yet. So it was very humiliating. Lily came to my defense when I got down. But I was so ashamed she had seen me like that, and that I needed to be defended in the first place by the girl I love...I mean I should be defending her! In any case I was stupid and called her a mudblood. I didn't mean it, but she won't let me explain! Could you give me advice? I mean...I really miss her. She's my only friend other then you of course. I...I...I just don't know what to do.

Your idiot cousin,

Severus Snape

Severus rolled up the parchment and quickly located an Owl that was up to flying his message to Jess in the states. That done he holed up in the library looking at potion books. Surprizingly the next day the Headmaster Dumbledore sent a message via owl to Severus that said:

Dear Severus Snape,

I would like to talk to you after breakfast at 8 o'clock.

Sincerely,

Headmaster Dumbledore

PS I like peppermint patties.

After breakfast Severus walked slowly to the Headmaster's office, slowly because this way he avoided Jame's and his friends, plus he would arrive on time. And so after scowling at the gargoyal and hissing out peppermint patties. He arrived in the office and was waved to a seat.

"Lemon Drop?" Albus asked

"No thank-you, Headmaster." he declined.

"Well I suppose you are wondering what I called you here for?" the headmaster asked his eyes twinkling like mad.

Severus opted to stay silent and raised an eyebrow and inclined his head slightly. Albus chuckled.

"I see you will be a great teacher one day. Well to proceed...I received an owl from your cousin Jess. She has asked to transfer to Hogwarts and take her Owls and Newt testing here. Our rune and arithmancy program can't be beat, and she wants to go into those particular fields. It is rare that a student transfers so late in the year, but she assures me that if you were to show her around she would be sure to adapt quickly to the new atmosphere. So provided you agree to show her around, I will allow her to transfer." Finished Dumbledore.

"Yes!"shouted Severus. He didn't know for sure what she was up to, but it would be great just to have someone to talk to. Someone who understood him. Someone who would always have his back, no matter what.

The headmaster's eyes twinkled like a disco ball on top speed. "Jess Prince. If you would come here please." he called. A woman with long black striaght hair and pale skin and coal black eyes enter from a side door.

"Severus!" she called at the same time he yelled "Jess!" and the two cousins hugged.

"Well, I see that you two getting along won't be a problem. Miss Jess we will have to sort you into a house at lunch time. So until then, why don't you two catch up?"

Severus nodded and smiling a real smile since Lily had stopped being his friend lead Jess out of the headmaster's office.

"Jess I can't believe your here!"

"Well I've been planning it ever since you told me about those jerks. And I wanted to meet this girl that decided you were special enough to stay friends with you even after you ended up in different houses. When I got your letter yesterday I was already halfway here. So I just stepped it up a little. Now I do believe I will end up in Gryffindor, so don't be mad. It'll work out for the best."

"You've a got a plan." he accused.

Jess smiled up at him impishly, "Of course I do! And you will help me. I just need to meet these marauders you've told me so much about and hopefully I can dig up some dirt on them."

"You sure you won't end up in Slytherin? That is awfully cunning of you."

"I'm only cunning when it comes to protecting my favorite people. And you are the only one on that list so far. I'm also loyal to a fault so the real danger is me ending up in Hufflepuff. Then again I did come here on practically a whim. So that is Gryffindorish."

"You also planned it all out. That is a trait of Ravenclaw. So really you could end up in any of the houses."

"To true. So cross your fingers and hope I get into Gryffindor. That is where I need to be to do the most...damage to those marauders who dared to harm my family. And don't you dare say they didn't harm you Severus! They are keeping everyone away from you! I bet anyone who wanted to be friends with you (aside from Lily) was pranked or bullied into staying away! Well do you think otherwise?"

"No. You are right. The only reason they didn't bother Lily is because James likes her." Severus said sadly.

"Well cheer up. Your about to get even. However unlike their pranks ours will be harmless. No need to sink to their level."

"Right." Severus gave Jess a quick hug and showed her how to navigate the castle and trick staircases and doors. He also introduced her to the ghosts. Finally it was lunch time and Jess fallowed Severus into the great hall and sat beside him. They were at the end of the table away from the other Slytherins who looked curiously at Jess, but declined to get to know her as she was by Severus who they deemed was making a mockery out of them by being friends with a mudblood and getting beat up regularly by Gryffindors. They caught the eye of the marauders as well, but because the headmaster was there they decided to pin Snape down after lunch for questioning. Plus they needed to get back to him for that mudblood comment he made about Lily. Towards the end of lunch the Headmaster stood and commanded the attention of the students.

"Attention, everyone. Before we go on about our day I wanted to annouce that we have a new student. She is transferring into sixth year. Her name is Jess Prince. My dear if you would be so kind as to join me up here?"

Jess stood and gave Severus a hug, before joining the headmaster. 'Definitely a Slytherin.' The Marauders thought. Dumbledore motioned McGonagall to bring out the stool and sorting hat. Jess sat on the stool and the hat barely touched her head when it roared "GRYFFINDOR!". Jess took of the hat genitally and handed it to McGonagall blew a kiss to Severus who was loudly cheering for his cousin along with a slight smattering from the Gryffindor table. The Marauders where shocked. Jess sat down by Lily who she had seen a picture of from Severus and offered her hand saying, "Hi! I'm Jess Prince, but you already know that. I hope we can be good friends!"

"Sure!" Lily smiled, "Hey how do you know Severus? He was cheering pretty loudly for you, even though you were a Gryffindor."

"Of course he was! We are cousins. I lived in America, though for most of my life. Severus is my only family, and I am his. He explained the housing system to me, and well we discussed where I might end up. He was very understanding when I asked what if I ended up in Gryffindor? He said so what? A lion and a snake can be friends he knew that from first hand experience. I asked him who his friend was and he said it didn't matter, she hates him now. But they were friends for little over five years so I don't have to worry. Plus family looks out for family."

Lily looked a little sad that Severus thought she hated him. Then again she hasn't talk to him since he called her a mudblood. She thought it would be safer for him, if their friendship ended after all he was in the Dark Lord's most loyal house. He could get killed.

"That's nice, that he said that. Oh! How rude of me I'm Lily Evens. And these guys are James, Remus, Sirius, and Peter." Lily pointed at each of the marauders and Jess shook their hands in turn. She grinned when she got a reading. So a Stag, a werewolf, a grim, and a rat. This will be fun. "Nice to meet you! I hope we will be good friends!" She was smiling so disarmingly that the marauders gulped and said, "Sure. Love to."

They then left the lunch room. "Well see you all later! I don't have my scheldule yet and Headmaster Dumbledore gave Severus the day off to help me find my way around!" Jess spoke quickly and bubbly, bouncing a little as she walked. "Plus we have to go to Diagon Alley. I need to get my school supplies."

Lily smiled at the other girl and said, "Well have fun with your cousin. Oh the password for our common room is Imdugud."

Jess nodded and repeated the word to show Lily she got it. Then Severus came up to the group.

"Jess! I got the list of books you need from Professor Dumbledore. We can use the floo in hi office to go to Diagon Alley." Severus smiled broadly. The Marauders were quite taken aback, they didn't know Severus could smile. Lily had tensed but relaxed when she saw how happy Severus was about his cousin being here. Jess and Severus surprised everyone again when, Jess gave a whoop a jumped wrapping her arms around Severus's neck and her legs around his waist. Severus laughing spun her around a few times, before setting her down and holding her hand led her away. Jess gave a quick wave to the others and away they went.

I don't think I ever saw Severus as happy as that. He must really love his cousin. Lily thought.

The marauders however were nervous when they saw the great comradeship between the two cousins. Something told them, that is Jess knew or found out about the trouble they had caused Severus they were in serious trouble.

How very right they were.

*Okay this is only going to be two chapters. Possible three. I'm not going to say what Jess and Severus did and got and talked about in Diagon Alley. Jess is a kind of seer, but she is still a regular witch. Her only special power is that when she has skin contact with someone, like a handshake, she can tell if they can become an animal or shapeshift. She won't tell however. She just uses that info to her best interest. In this case getting even with those who hurt her cousin. Please Review!