It was utterly pathetic.
Really, there was no other word to describe it.
It was pathetic.
He was pathetic.
What kind of low down piece of scum does something like this?
What kind of best friend, what kind of man, hurts someone in this way?
Six years.
Six years he had been in love with her.
Six years his best friend had been in love with her.
So why on earth did he himself, think that he could suddenly take that away in a single night?
That his feelings of annoyance, grudging admiration and that self-same disbelief could suddenly change into something else?
Into something more?
He didn't even know how it happened.
All it took was one look.
A single look over the top of a Transfiguration textbook one day in class.
Where bright emerald met stormy gray.
And he didn't know if it was because it was the first time since he had met her that he had looked at her so straight in the eye
Or if it was just because
That he suddenly felt himself falling.
Falling and falling and falling with no end anywhere in sight.
Into a void so deep and endless that he was completely and utterly swallowed up
Thrust into a darkness so dark that it was light.
But he felt himself fall.
Harder than ever before.
And as he fell
Twisting and turning
He knew two things.
Only two.
That he loved her.
Completely and irrevocably.
And that she could never, never, never be his.
Ever.
So as the days changed into weeks and the weeks into months and the months into years
He never said a word.
Not a single word.
It was pathetic, really.
Pathetic in many senses.
In that he was in love with his best friend's love
And in that he never had the courage,
That he, Sirius Black,
Never had the courage to say a single word.
Not a single word.
And for that, he knew
He was pathetic.
----
*Sighhhhh* I reallyyyy need to lay off these Lily/Sirius fics. :P But they're just too addicting, lol.
As always, PLEASE read and review! :D You all make my day. :)
-Fanta-Faerie
