Goodbye Brother

Part I: Letters and Promises

[Sirius]

-x-


Sirius could barely contain his excitement as the tawny barn owl flew closer and closer to his window, clutching a white envelope in its' talons.

"Reg!" he shouted with excitement, his heart beating a million miles a minute. "Reg get over here!"

He could hear his brother's frantic footsteps bounding up the stairs, and the disgruntled mutterings of their house-elves, Kreacher and Malicia. Reg had probably knocked something over again in his haste to get to Sirius' room.

The owl was coming closer, and Sirius threw open his bedroom windows to give it safe passage into his room. He didn't want anything stopping him from getting his Hogwarts letter, not even his stupid creaky windows.

Behind him, Sirius heard his door swing open and the unmistakable huffing and puffing of his brother. He didn't bother turning around and waited for Reg to join him by the window. From the corner of his eye, Sirius could see Reg looking at the window and back at him, probably puzzled and confused.

"What's going on Siri?"

Sirius didn't reply, and instead pointed at the barn owl, which had just crossed the threshold of their gates.

"Wow! Is that your Hogwarts letter?" Sirius didn't even have time to reply to him, because as soon as Regulus stopped speaking the owl dropped the envelope in its talons on Sirius' lap and perched itself on the windowsill. "Can I open it?"

"No way! You're getting your own one next year," Sirius replied, annoyed that his brother would even bother asking. But his annoyance quickly faded and no sooner had he reached for the owl to pet it, it flew away in a hurry.

"It doesn't look as cool as I thought it would," Regulus whispered.

"I don't care, it's brilliant!" Sirius brushed his fingers on top of the parchment envelope and wondered how the heck Hogwarts knew the exact location of his bedroom. He turned it over and a deep red seal was embossed with the Hogwarts seal. "Reg isn't this so exciting?"

Behind him, Regulus shrugged but Sirius was too busy ripping the envelope open and dropping the contents of it onto the floor, kneeling down to gather the letter and other bits of loose parchment. One of them had a booklist, another had a list for a recommended set of robes and stuff to buy. The third, and the heaviest, was a letter.

Sirius didn't bother reading it in too much detail, he had heard more than enough about Hogwarts from his cousins to be able to know what to do, where to go, and what to expect. He'd always known he was supposed to go to Hogwarts, but it wasn't until he'd held the envelope in his hands that he knew, for sure, that he was going.

Beside him, Regulus sat on the floor and crossed his legs. He grabbed the bits of parchment and, unlike Sirius, read through each bit of parchment thoroughly. His eyebrows furrowed from concentrating so hard.

"Merlin! You'll have to buy a lot of books, and robes too."

"Yeah and I have to buy a wand too! It says I can have a pet, and I think having a pet owl would be kind of cool, I could send letters to you and my friends," Sirius looked down at his knees sadly. He didn't really have friends, Reg was the only one, and so were Cissy and Andy - their cousins. "Well, when I get friends that is."

"Do you think you'll be in Slytherin like Cissy and Andy?" Reg asked as he sat on the floor next to his brother, looking at the letter and pieces of parchment sadly.

Up until that point, Sirius hadn't really thought about which house he was going to be in. He just wanted to go to Hogwarts. But his brother's question bothered him. Not because it was offensive or anything, but because he wasn't really sure which house he would be in.

He knew his mother and father, and probably the rest of their family too, would be disappointed if he wasn't in Slytherin; but he had also always liked the sound of Gryffindor, where dwelled the brave at heart. He didn't know if he was brave enough to be one, but he wanted to be. He'd heard his cousin Andy talking about how cool some of the Hufflepuffs could be too, and Sirius didn't quite mind the sound of being one of them either.

He wanted to go to Hogwarts to be away from his family, but if he was in Slytherin, he'd only be surrounded by them and their family friends. He didn't have that much of a problem with them, but he had a feeling that some of them weren't as nice as their family said they were.

Besides, being in Slytherin would mean he'd have to see his cousin Bella all the time, and he didn't really like the idea of that. Especially after he'd seen her kick their house-elf Mal down the stairs for forgetting to iron her clothes during the Christmas holidays.

"I dunno Reg, maybe."

Reg nodded, his eyebrows knitted together, "Mamma and Papa will be mad if you aren't."

"I know, but I don't get to choose, it's all up to the hat isn't it?" He didn't really know if you had any choice on which house to get into, but Sirius figured that no matter what he could blame the hat.

Sirius folded the pieces of parchment back up into neat squares and shoved them back into the now torn envelope, reminding himself to give it to his parents when they came home from some meeting they were having. They were always off somewhere or other, having meetings with scary looking people who said weird things.

"I can't wait to get out of here Reg," Sirius said as he leaned back on his hands and looked at his ceiling. Bits of gold and silver sparkled from the sunlight, he'd always liked the little stars and galaxies he'd painted up there when he was littler. "It'll be so awesome to see Hogwarts for real, and meet other people, and just get away from here. I hate this stupid place."

Hogwarts wouldn't be like this place at all. It would be full of sunshine, and Quidditch, and proper good food, and best of all it wouldn't have his parents, mean little house elves, or paintings that said awful things to you sometimes.

"I don't think I want you to go to Hogwarts this year," Reg whispered, dropping the parchment on the floor and pulling his knees up close to his chest. He wrapped his arms tight around his knees and rested his head on top. "Can't you just wait until I get my letter next year? So that we can go together?"

"What? Why would I want to do that?"

Reg sniffled as he looked out towards the window, "What if...what if you make new friends. And what if they're so cool, and Hogwarts is so awesome, that you won't want to come back here? What if you forget me?" Sirius felt awful as his brother sniffled and his voice got quieter. "I don't want to be all alone here."

"Don't you ever say that!" Sirius said, nudging his brother's shoulder. "How could I forget you Reg? You're my brother, I won't ever forget you."

"Yeah but you won't see me everyday, and you'll see your friends everyday, so you might forget me."

"Well then fine, I'll write to you every single day and you won't even notice that I'm not here. I'll tell you all about Hogwarts, and my classes, and my friends. And I'll tell you all about Quidditch too. And before you know it, I'll be back for Christmas, and Easter and the summer holidays!"

"B-but I - "

"Come on Reg, we're only going to be apart for now, next year you'll get your letter too and you can come to Hogwarts with me! We can go together and you can meet whoever my new friends will be."

Reg sniffled once more and wiped his nose against the back of his hand, his eyes were a little watery and Sirius wrapped an arm around his brother, "What if the hat puts us in different houses?"

"Reg, even if it does put us in different houses, and even if we play Quidditch against each other, and even if we don't get along every day, that doesn't matter." Sirius shuffled closer to his brother until their shoulders were touching and he wrapped his arm tighter around him, poking him in the rib with his other hand. "Because you're my brother. You'll always be my little brother."

"Do you promise?" Reg whispered, his voice a little bit croaky from crying.

"Yeah, I promise," Sirius replied as he ruffled his brother's hair. "Now come on, stop being such a crybaby, d'you want to go out and play a bit of Quidditch before Mal wakes up?"

Sirius chuckled when his brother jumped up from the floor and ran towards their small backyard, shouting that he would beat him this time.


Author's Note

This will be a short series of one shots centering around how Sirius and Regulus grew apart and eventually embarked on divergent paths in their lives. It is heavily inspired by fanart from the brilliant and talented Alessia Trunfio (you can find her on Instagram and Tumblr)

It certainly won't be a happy sort of story, and we all know where's going. But i always love delving into the reasons why canon moments happened, and what led to different events happening. This one specifically will be how these two brothers' lives diverged so dramatically, and why.

I do hope you enjoy it, and for those reading A Furry Little Problem - I do promise I'll finish it. I just hit a bit of writers block on it and need to step away from it for a little while and get other ideas out before going back and finishing it!

Hope you like it, and don't forget to leave a review, comment, or feedback. Love reading it!

Until next time, Andy xoxo