End of Days
By: Layde3 x3
I actually had another fic by the same name but I took that one down due to lack of motivation and thought. This fic is still in the iffy stages. So bear with me, I'm just trying out an idea and I'm not sure that I will keep it goin cuz I've been hitting major writers block lately. Grrz!
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Fairy tales. When you're small every parent tells their child of a land far far away. In which, a heroine or hero is full of spirit and suffers through massive unjust hardships. In which, the main character possess a noble spirit and undeniable luck which obviously is set up to help them overcome the injustice that they had to endure. There is only one thing that that all fairy tales seem to have in common which is "happily ever after." Of course, I never knew what happily ever after meant. Maybe it meant that the main character lived in peace for the rest of their life, or maybe it meant that they embarked on new exciting adventures or maybe it just meant death. I never knew what happily ever after meant and probably never will. Fairy tales lead children to think that their lives can be like that. Have a happy ending that is; whatever that may be. Fairy tales was the one thing that I never believed in. Not even as a child. It was a nice story but that's all it was; a story.
I have done many horrible things in my short life. I however do not regret any of it. Not any of it. I did it because I had to. It was my duty. I made a choice. The only choice I could have and I will never regret it. There are many people in this world that regret every thing that they do but I am not so fickle to be like that. Everyday when I wake up knowing that my life will not have a happy ending. I have committed to many sins to ever expect happiness. Happiness is not something that I want. Happiness is not something that I need. You may think that I have a very cynical view but to tell the truth I am nothing but a sinner.
I am a spy. A traitor. A assassin. A killer.
That is my profession. I sell my skills to the highest bidder. No job is too horrible or despicable for me. I will do anything that you require as long as you have the money. My reasons are purely selfish. I need money and lots of it. That is why I do these horrible things. I am a sinner in every sense of the word but I do not regret my path. This is the path that I have chosen and I shall not regret it. I know my duty and I will not shy away from it. I will not abandon my family. I will kill, hunt and steal as long I can tell myself that it's for my family. As long as I can tell myself that this is the only way, that this is what I have to do, that this is what I was meant to be. As long as I have that then I can come back to my broken family and smile at them. Smile at them and provide for them. As long as I have that.
That's why I never believed in fairy tales. I knew that no one would come and save me. There would be no fairy godmother or handsome prince to come and save me from the harshness of my life. All I ever had was me and only me. No would save me but myself. It's enough. I'm smart, fast and I've been doing this a long time. In the end all you have is yourself.
I never believed in fairy tales. Perhaps if I did, then maybe I wouldn't be here. With my knees against the cold floor, pain shooting throughout my slim body, bleeding profusely from several places with a gun to the back of my head. Maybe. Just maybe.
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