INTERVAL 01
Digestion - Point of Pie
Fettel Eats And Regurgitates
(Interval 01- Inception- Point of Origin)
First Encounter Action Recon secret operatives are getting briefed on their mission in the shitty 'meeting room', a large monitor is hanged on the wall showing a peculiar scene. Apparently someone is busy making acquaintance with an employee; by the means of his teeth. Said employee must also be dead now judging by how famished the perpetrator seems to be if not only by the amount of blood found on the scene. Additionally, two armed soldiers are standing watch as their boss just chows down, a bottle of BBQ sauce lying next to him.
The members watching the scene were composed of three men and one woman. One of the men present, JaCowSki, was the first to talk:
« Fucker's got quite an appetite….»
The medical and scene-recon expert, a woman named Jin, replied, «He's getting something else out of it.»
«Such as vitamins and nutrients? Would that also give him potassium?»
«No, I was thinking of something more along the lines of him getting his kicks.»
Her teammates waited the "more-than-required" call for a joke, but it never came, which meant she was serious. After moments of listening to Fettel masticate with utmost joy, the Lieutenant Betters finally pressed mute.
«Knew I should have done that when the meeting started, hours ago…. »
Someone coughed. The Lieutenant kept briefing:
«Alright, under direct contact from Arm-a-Scum Technologies Corporation; our mission is to locate, this...», he avoided looking at the man in question, «...cannibalistic maniac, we don't really know exactly the extent of his capabilities-»
Jin interrupted him, «Except for his astonishing devotion to "self-refueling." »
«…right, that, but we do know that he is known to be powerful-»
This time it was JaCowSki's turn to cut him off, «He lifts? Doesn't look like it from here.»
The woman speculated out loud, «I wonder what human flesh tastes like…»
«Something like regret?»
Betters exploded, «Fucking fried chicken, could you all let me finish?! He has supernatural powers coming from his mind, he can do shit with it, it's some scientific crap that I can't comprehend.»
Jin whispered, «No surprise there…»
«Anyway he controls those guys, they're called Replica Soldiers, be aware when dealing with this elite since he commands them with his mind and all so I guess he could fuck around in yours as well, or some more complicated smart crap like that. In other words, you find Fettel you put an end to this nonsense.»
JaCowSki looked at his boss, «Replica Soldiers? Mind control freak AKA cannibalistic dude on the loose? Rated M for mature? See, this shit is why nobody takes us seriously!»
Jin crossed her arms, «No, the reason why we're tagged as useless morons is because we're lead by some incompetent fool who doesn't even know it himself.»
The Lt. confirmed this, «Got that right Jin, what you say is always important to me.»
She suddenly felt the urge to kill the sufficient prick, but instead only asked a question, «How do we find him?»
Betters motioned to the screen, «Arm-a-Scum implanted some transmitter in his left nipple back then.»
JaCowSki lifted a hand to his own chest in some unconscious sympathetic response, «That's convenient…..I think.»
The Lt. then looked Pointman's way, who had been entirely motionless and silent, hiding behind his shades and cloth-mask. «What about you buddy, ready for some ass-kissing, I uh mean kicking?»
JaCowSki scoffed, «Put him in the field? Are you fucking bat-shit crazy having goddamn lost it and is now an asylum case? He just transferred in an hour ago!»
The woman looked at him, «Don't you mean 'week'.»
«No barely just a fuckin' hour ago! I saw him descend from that truck, shoot some targets in the training field for only five minutes and then they gave him one of our outfits; plus he has the right to wear this cloth on his head for some reason while we're not allowed to look as badass.»
Betters waved a hand, «You've seen his training results, his reflexes are totally off the charts. Besides, he's got one hell of a father fucking delicious soup receipt.»
JaCowSki quickly sized him up and down, «Wha…?...whatever, it's your call.»
The Lt. licked his lips, «Damn right it is.»
Pointman didn't give a shit since he just doesn't, he never cared for anything. From his birth forward he never did, even never spoke a word. Some say he doesn't even blink under those black shades of his but that's just rumors.
The camera zoomed in on Fettel's face, becoming clearer as the blurred pixels changed to a more adequate resolution. At the view, Pointman felt something…..
...felt he needed to take a piss. I told you he doesn't give a shit….
Lt. Betters drove Pointman to some dark alleys near some abandoned building deciding that's where he'd drop him off and nowhere else. Pointman could care less, the sooner he left that car and the smell of feces permeating the air the better. So it was no surprise the engine had merely come to an alt that the soldier darted out and vanished at a corner.
His first encounter were planks, easy enough, he destroyed the obstruction like a pro.
When he entered the decrepit building though that's when bizarre things started to occur. At some point he moved around a corner where tiles suddenly decided to quit being held on the walls and performed synchronized suicides. Next a bloodied face flashed before the soldier's eyes; he didn't even so much as flinch and just went on, only to see a shadow ahead.
First he thought JaCowSki was just being an ass, talking to himself and walking like a zombie; exactly like he would do all the time off duty. But Pointman soon realized that JaCowSki couldn't suddenly evaporate into a black cloud of ashes, let alone move a door with his mind, or push supplies off a shelf without touching any of it more so without even being present in the first place.
A low ominous voice then mentioned they hated cookies; he just dismissed it and continued forward.
Soon he got reunited with JaCowSki, whom randomly felt like vandalizing a door with his gunstock shattering the glass, then disappeared just as fast. Pointman made his way around the obstruction and found him again, that is until the guy decided to play it as if they were in a movie and kick that door open….only to realize it only end well in movies. After four hours of cursing plus holding his leg in pain, seeking compassion from a hidden-faced and motionless Pointman; he then opened the door.
Time seemed to slow down, pretty much the same as when Pointman presses the R1 button to…oops, breaking fourth-wall here. In any event, JaCowSki just decided he'd vanish into the same dark ashes as the unknown man from earlier. How nice of him to just fuck off like that while on duty, leave all the recon work to him; well, who cares. Pointman walked through the ashes, checking his neat reflection in the flack of water on his way.
Further ahead laid his second obstacle in the form of a cheap padlock on a door; some words appeared right in front of the soldier ordering him to waste bullets trying to shoot it off but Pointman broke it with his head instead, everything worked out fine still.
Some voice then said, "You were born here, in this place, exactly where you're walking right this instant, no wait now you've gone too far. I know because I was there…..well not really, well yeah but, fuckin' fack just walk to my corpse and never mind what I just mumbled."
He then arrived into the next room where a present had been abandoned there for him. He must've zoned out for long since when he turned around JaCowSki was there, talking, like usual. The dead bloodied man forcefully sitting on the chair was mute of course, holding a box of Oreo on his lap. Betters then told them that Fettel's signal had been picked up on the roof, Pointman was then sent to check it out while the other would just remain behind and take it easy, probably eat the rest of the Oreos; ass.
Going up the stairs, a presence was seen walking by the door but nobody was there when Pointman came out. Being alone brought his sight to the horizon so he was just admiring the beautiful sky when something hit him in the face. Fettel had merely just given him his second gift in the form of a wooden plank. It apparently took him a little while before he came back to reality since the wall behind Paxton was now painted with blood, so he figured the man must have passed the time by snacking on another human, waiting patiently; how kind of him. When Pointman actually moved his head a bit to look across him, Fettel knew it was time to strike F.E.A.R. in the man's heart, or at least in his face.
Kneeling down, he stared at the soldier, «The dead man's name was Chows Hamburger. Ahh, I remember him, but are the memories mine or hers? Or is it that I am reading your mind, or the ones of your squad, or the other squad on that other mission? Hard to say, this gift of mine is not that easily controlled…..»
He licked his fingers as if he was still savoring his last meal, remembering things only he could see while forgetting the one actually taking place before him. Pointman stared, the replica soldiers just remained there motionless, then Fettel suddenly came back from wherever he had gone to in his mind.
«It makes no difference, he deserved to die; they all deserve to die. To just be hunted down like mere preys then devoured to only be ripped to shreds once their memories has been assimilated. Tell me, what kind of BBQ sauce do you prefer?»
Pointman blinked this time, seemed like he hadn't done that in ages, alright he never blinks so that was his first time. Fettel seemed to relentlessly stare at him, then after a while he said nonchalantly; «You're supposed to lose consciousness again so I can mystically disappear so as to pretend this meeting of ours actually never occurred…hell even the blood on the wall behind me will vanish.»
Nothing happened so Fettel hit him in the face with the plank again; blackout.
PM came to for the second time, from slumbers he isn't used to since he never sleeps; he was getting up when Betters came over radio:
«What was that fucked up creepy voice I just heard? …Do you have multiple personalities? Whatever the fuck you're doing, or whatever the hell you are; report back to your team. We lost Fettel's signal again.»
Amateurs or simply ominous? You decide….
Before he completely returned to the now-known-carcass with the probably emptied cookie box, he overheard JaCowSki talking in his back, or more precisely in his face but to his right through a wall.
«What do you think of the new guy?»
Jin kept analyzing the corpse as she spoke, poking the cadaver in his remaining eyeball, «Didn't know you're gay; absolutely no problem with that at least you'll get off my back…..»
«Wha, no, that's not what I meant!»
«Say what you mean then.»
«Doesn't he freak you out?»
«Is he supposed to?»
«Well earlier I found him creepily staring at this corpse, switching aim at it and all; plus I bet he's the one who ate all the damn cookies, the selfish ass.»
She glanced at him, «Yes I'm sure that explains the black powdered remains of Oreos on the side of your mouth. Or perhaps he did eat them all and then you guys just decided to share, both locking mouths; is that what you're trying to tell me?»
«Nno, listen! It's something about the way he looks, he looks strange.»
The medic went back to her investigation, «The day that I will look up to you as a judge of character will be a sad day indeed. Scratch that, stuck here with you, it can't get any shittier.»
«NO, it's about his eyes….»
«You can't even see them….»
«…it's like he sees right through you!»
«Maybe because you're one dimensional.»
«Oh yeh, what does that even mean?»
«Figure it out, genius.»
Pointman had enough of this and decided to make his presence known, making JaCowSki nearly piss himself.
«H-hey, back already!»
Jin pulled some equipment out of her tiny medical bag and motioned to the men, «You two can leave, you're done here, I'm staying to make sure this cadaver gets properly handled.»
«Ha, yeh you do that, you 'handle' him right.»
She felt homicidal again. «One dimensional, keep proving my point; and, as dead as this man is, I bet he has more vigor than you'll ever have.»
«Tssh…..no wait…uhhh…..what…?»
Then out of nowhere a flashback occurred. A guy wearing a white coat was seen talking to himself facing a corner and having spasms; too much cocaine does that.
«I tried to forget….I've tried so hard to forget, but no amount of alcohol, self-administrated drugs or sessions of vigorously hitting my face on the wall would help…..! ...what was I talking about again?»
Author Note: The reason why I put my title and the game's real titles underneath is for people to notice the word-play: since I don't suppose everyone will remember what the real titles were. That way, with something to gauge my titles with, I assume they have more punch than if they were by themselves.
Also in the next chapters I will mainly be using food names for the nameless-unmentioned characters of the game, I thought it would fit thanks to Fettel's cannibalistic nature. Plus, it is completely normal that there are some Intervals missing; it only is because I did not write about them. Instead I favored the SFOD-D squad 'Bonus Mission', which was really enjoyable to write.
Lastly, don't bust my brain with your 'Fuck Everything And Run' cliché, apparently that's all people can come up with and it's an extremely easy one. Hopefully the ones I wrote in this parody will be refreshing to most. I've written the word 'Armacham' five times differently as well, so they're not errors.
