We all make choices. It defines who we are and how people view us. Good or bad, you always have a choice...
But what if one is forced on you?
I begged her to reconsider her choice, but she had been adamant, unaware of how much this hurt me. The fight had been one of the hardest of my entire life. How do you kill one who has taught you all you know? I looked at Kreia, the pain in her eyes shining, knowing I had killed her. Despite this, she told me of the future. How my companions would fair, and even the fate of the Republic itself.
"Tell me Exile, what will your path be?" Kreia asked, even though she already knew the answer. "I will follow Revan's path." I announced. Without fanfare, I had decided my fate in an instant. Yet strangely, I did not feel scared. "Perhaps you had already decided your fate long ago." Looking back up, I met her eyes. It was always amazing how she could read me like a book.
"Rest now Kreia, your time in this place is over."
As I watched her fall, I knew I had lost part of me as well. Almost as if an artery had been severed. Suddenly, I was knocked off my feet as a massive earthquake ravaged Malachor V. I scrambled to my feet as the Academy crumbled into dust right on top of us. To the right of me, I noticed the Ebon Hawk looming at the edge like a life raft. The hatch flew open as Mira screamed at me to get in. Instead of running, I turned to Kreia's body and gingerly picked her up. "Leave her!" Mira shouted as she waved frantically at me to hurry. Scrambling to the Ebon Hawk, I clambered inside just as Atton banked the craft up to avoid a sickly green fireball that was rising up from the planets core, threatening to consume the ship.
I ignored the questioning faces of my friends as I made my way to the cargo hold. As the Hawk leveled out, I sat against the wall, resting Kreia's head in my lap. While I stroked her hair, I looked at her face.
She looked peaceful, almost as if she was asleep, but her chest no longer rose and fell. I leaned my head against bulkhead and revisited memories of our times together...
I remembered listening to her many tales of the past, lessons full of wisdom. I remembered how she lost her hand for me on Peragus. I remembered how she taught me to truly listen through the force. But most of all, I remembered how she always had faith in me, even when I had none in myself.
I'm not exactly sure when I started crying All of the pain I had bottled up over the years was spilling out, but not even the day I was exiled hurt this bad. Kreia had been so much more than a friend during our seemingly hopeless war against an unseen enemy. She had been a mentor, a teacher, maybe even a mother. She had manipulated us from day one, and yet I couldn't hate her.
"Hey Trista."
I hadn't even noticed anyone enter. Turning my body slightly, I looked at her, face etched with worry and concern. I buried my head in her shoulder, releasing all my sorrow. She said nothing, just holding me as I cried. "What have I done?" I managed to choke out. She began stroking my hair as my tears fell. "You did what you had to do."
We always have choices, but we won't always like them.
