After watching the new Star Wars movie, I automatically fell in love with the character Kylo Ren. His angst-y past and secluded personality was exactly what I was looking for. I know that he is a character that has had a tough past, and that he knows he should be Light, yet he feels compelled to be Dark. He is perfect.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy!


All that he wanted to do, more than anything in the world, was to just sleep. Forever, if that was an option. His eyelids felt heavy, and he just didn't want this bliss to end. His head felt like it had been stuffed with cotton balls, and he swore he gained several hundred pounds. He was too tired. How long has it been since I've actually relaxed? Too long. He willed his mind to wander into nothing, the black unknown, however his body had another idea. Out of nowhere, a raging headache pounded against the inside of his over-inflated skull. Ren winced and tried to sit up on whatever he was lying down on, but immediately fell back due to pain that suddenly flared up in his abdomen, face, and shoulder. The pain brought back the memories of Starkiller Base; killing his father, the woods, the snow, the traitor, the girl.

His left eye cracked open to be met with an unfamiliar gray ceiling. That's strange. Ren brought his hand up to his face, remembering the blinding agony that the girl's lightsaber brought as it quickly sliced and melted the flesh around his right eye. The pads of his fingers lightly grazed against the rough material of the bandages that most likely were wrapped unceremoniously around his head. The pathetic medical team probably didn't even sterilize my wounds. The medical practitioners at Starkiller (including the droids) were far from efficient. There was no need for them to be good in the first place. No one dared to even approach the Base, much less attempt an attack on it. Well, before the Resistance infiltrated Starkiller, guns blazing.

Ren brought his hands up to his face and examined them, noting the several bandages around some of his fingers and the palms of his hands. His eye wandered from the extensive bandages from his hands to his arms, which were covered in thick green sleeves that (to his guess) were attached to some sort of robe.

Those imbeciles probably tore apart my suit. Now slightly annoyed, Ren pushed himself up, fully ignoring the pain that was slowly blossoming in his side and shoulder at every movement. Ren noticed that a small blanket was wrapped carefully around his entire body, which was very unusual.

Something is not right here.

Pushing the blanket aside, Ren swung his legs around and set them on the floor. Ren, now sitting up, was able to fully take in his surroundings. He was dressed in a long sleeved green shirt (that had seen some better days) and black pants that barely reached his sock-covered feet/ankles. He was sitting on a small cot that was just big enough to fit his entire body that was pushed back into the corner of a rather small (but not uncomfortably so) room. A cell is a better description he thought as he stared at the force-field entrance that took up the entire far side of the wall.

The last thing that he remembered was watching the girl step onto the Millennium Falcon with stormtrooper in the Wookie's arms. Did I pass out? He did not know. He could not remember anything after that. Was I picked up from a passing ship?

What happened to the Base?

Where am I?

The sound of a force field dropping had Ren on his feet in seconds. It was the girl. The one they called Rey.

"Welcome back Solo," Rey greeted, a hint of sarcasm was evident in her voice, and Ren did not miss it.

"My name is Kylo Ren. Ben Solo is dead," Ren shot back, slowly approaching the girl. Plans of escape ran through his mind with each step he took. To his surprise, the girl did not seem frightened at his advances, which was strange, however he did not show it. He got about three feet away from his cot before an invisible barrier deterred his movements.

"A force field? Are you that frightened of me?" Ren questioned, smirking as he thought of the extraordinary actions the Resistance were taking.

"It's a safety precaution really. Just in case you try to escape. It's protocol," Rey snarkily replied, crossing her arms against her chest. Ren was not fazed by her comment. He paced back and forth within his horribly confined space, only now letting the panic seep into his consciousness. Not now!

"Where am I?" he spat, trying to look past the girl's form to better scope out the place. He did not have such luck however.

"At a Resistance base. That's as detailed as I'm going to be."

Ren's hopes dropped. He was never going to get back to the Order if he was stuck at a Resistance base. He could be anywhere, "What happened? And why exactly am I here?"

The girl took a moment to reply, choosing her words carefully, "We were able to unstabilize your weapon to the point where the sun's energy contained in it exploded the entire planet. However, before the planet was destroyed, a Wookiee of ours was able to pick me and Finn up from the surface. The Wookiee, Chewbacca, and I went back and were able to save you too from the explosion."

Ren looked at her, eyes searching her features to see the lie in her story. Unfortunately, he did not find anything. He drawled, "So you came back for me? Does the little Jakku girl care for the great Kylo Ren so much that she would risk her own life to save that of her enemy?"

"Don't flatter yourself Ben. I only saved you because I was ordered to."

This time, Ren couldn't stop the small display of shock on his face, "By who?" Already he was despising the answer.

"Who do you think?"

Ren let his eyes fall to the floor. His mother. The only one that actually believed that he could "switch to the Light". His hands unconsciously fisted, eliciting pain from several of the wounds under the bandages.

Rey noticed the change in his demeanor. He looked defeated, old almost. Rey let her arms fall to her side as she shifted her weight, now feeling very self conscious. Is this pity? Am I actually pitying this man?

"You're lucky you know," Rey stated, deciding to change subjects, "The wounds that you got were pretty bad. It took a long time before we got those fully closed. The one on your face was probably the worst," Ren looked up at Rey, left eye trying to display his dislike. Rey continued, "I'll tell you one thing, it's going to leave a mean scar." Ren turned his face away. He wasn't so much angry at her, but more at himself. He should have seen it coming. He shouldn't have even been injured. He was taught by that old geezer Skywalker, and then trained by the almighty and all powerful Snoke. Yet he was defeated by a rogue stormtrooper and a girl from Jakku. If Snoke hears about this-.

"Sorry about that by the way," Ren's head shot back up to find that Rey's features had softened slightly , "I didn't exactly mean to hurt you so badly- just to stall you until help came-"

"I don't need your pathetic apologies. I can handle myself just fine" he shot. It was his fault, and now his face will forever bear his failure.

Rey dismissed his retort. She knew he was too proud to accept anything, "We were afraid you might have gotten a cold or even pneumonia on that base due to all of the snow. But we patched you up pretty well."

Ren didn't reply to that. He let himself fall onto the cot and stare at the girl with his good eye. Rey, knowing that he will not respond, added, "Food comes three times a day, and bathroom breaks are to your disposal. You just have to ask one of the guards outside your room."

With that, Rey walked out of the room and signaled the guard to enact the force fields. The doorway closed and Solo was able to walk around freely in his room.

Just before Ren watched her leave, he saw her shout over her shoulder, "The Commander is going to be down shortly!" And with that she left.

Ren let his self control fall as he laid himself on his cot on his side, making sure his back was facing towards the "door". He tried to control his breathing as best as he could, however it was very hard due to the fact that he was still in a confined space. He had always been ashamed of his claustrophobia, and Snoke was just as disappointed as he was. Memories of Snoke trying to help him get over his fear made him shiver. Ren cursed under his breath. I should be grateful that Snoke even tried to help me. I could be in a much worse state. I cannot start being ungrateful just because I am not with my people.

Taking a deep breath, Ren closed his good eye and desperately tried to focus on meditating. It would have been much easier if the lumps in his mattress weren't digging into the charred flesh of his injuries. Ren gritted his teeth and pushed the pain down, just like he had done so many times before.

Kylo Ren. That used to mean something. People feared that name; used to tremble at the very thought of the power that he had. The First Order was his second-coming after he left Skywalker. He lived for the Dark. He had to. Skywalker infused his "Light" into him. That's why he questioned Snoke's (and the Dark side's) power. It was all of Skywalker's fault. That old fool, so ignorant of the power that lay within his grasp. He was more powerful than Skywalker, than anyone, after his training with Snoke. Fools! Don't they understand that the First Order will ultimately rule the universe?

Then why do they still fight?

What is the point?

Because of hope.

Ren laughed, a cold and distant laugh. Hope was a lie. Something to tell the children to get them to stop crying their heads off. Hope was for the weak, and Ren was anything but.

So Ren stayed where he was, refusing to let his fear get the best of him. If the Resistance wanted to torture him for information, they were doing a damn good job of it.

I can do this, he thought, I can get through this. I did it before, I can do it again.


So that was the first chapter. Probably going to be a while before I actually update. Midterms are here and I actually need to study. Leave a comment please! Oh and make sure to follow. There is major whump later, for those who love that kind of stuff (i do lol).