Disclaimer: don't bother. I didn't do it.
A/N: kay, so it's 2:11 a.m., and I can't sleep. So I'm sitting here at my computer writing… this. I have NO idea what it's going to be. I would be working on 'Slytherin Beauty', but I've run out of inspiration for the moment. I mean, I tried to write the next chappie, and wound up killing Lily, SO, that's obviously NOT going to work, is it?
Marauders' NotesPoTiOnS
Padfoot: Stop glaring at me, Prongs! Prongs: I CAN'T believe you just did that! Moony: Really, Padfoot, even for you…Padfoot: It's not like I can help it! I mean, the pure malice in those eyes! The hate! The anger! The NEED to dominate the world!
Prongs: It was a RABBIT! Padfoot: They're EVIL!Moony: Just because of that book…
Prongs: You lit the friggin rabbit on FIRE! Padfoot: It deserved it! Prongs: In front of EVANS! Padfoot: Oh, it's not that bad! She looked like she was HAPPY I set the bloody rabbit on fire… Moony: Then you blamed it on him… Padfoot:sniggers: Oh, yeah… I think she was more upset about me blaming Prongs for hexing those Slytherins… Prongs: I'm going to have a hand print on my face forever! Padfoot: And worship it every day…Moony: She's looking at you, Prongs.
Prongs: What:jumps up:makes complete fool of himself:Evans:looks up to see Prongs looking at her: SOD OFF!
Prongs:smacks Moony: Moony:high-fives Padfoot: Padfoot: That makes it what… seven times today?Prongs:glares evilly: Bunny killer.
Padfoot: THEY'RE EVIL! They have beady little red eyes! And they use their ears as walkie-talkies! And—
Prongs: What's a walkie-talkie?Padfoot: No idea. But didn't it sound cool? Anyway, have you SEEN their insanely long and pointy teeth? They sharpen them when no one's looking, I swear!
Moony: Padfoot? Padfoot: Yeah?Moony: You're deranged.
Padfoot: Thank you. Wanna join my club against rabbits? Moony: …Padfoot: It's called 'S.T.A.B.' or Society To Assassinate Bunnies.
Moony: Prongs is drooling again.
Prongs: Am not:wipes drool off of face:continues to stare at Evans:Padfoot: If you stare at her long enough, maybe she'll slap you again.
Prongs:glares:Evans: do you guys have an extra bezoar?
Prongs: Unnnnnnnnnnnng…….
Evans: Well:glares at Prongs: Padfoot:laughs at Prongs: Moony: Yes… Padfoot, where's the extra bezoar?Padfoot: Oops.
Moony: Oops what? Padfoot: Oops, it's really close to lunch…Moony: That's disgusting.
Evans: Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
Prongs: Unnnnnnnnnng………Padfoot: I think I'm gonna be sick.
Moony:rolls eyes: You've eaten worse before.
Padfoot: Like what?Moony: Remember when Prongs dared you to eat that green thing that had been growing under Wormtail's bed for two months?
Padfoot: Yeah, but that didn't come from the stomach of a goat… Moony: No one KNOWS where it came from… Prongs:seemingly over his case of 'Unnnnngs': What's worse, is he LIKED it! Padfoot:shrugs: It wasn't bad…Moony: You're growing it under your bed now, aren't you?
Padfoot: Maybe.
Moony and Prongs:shudder:
Padfoot: You know what else is evil? BUTTERFLIES!
Evans: YES! Butterflies are evil! One attempted to MURDER me once! But they're not as bad as rabbits… I SWEAR this rabbit came after me with a steak knife…
Padfoot: Yeah! Regulus's pet rabbit stole my wand and hexed me this one time!
Evans and Padfoot:continue to talk about demonic rabbits and butterflies:
Prongs: Unnnnnnnnnnnng… :drools:
Moony: Ummmmmmmmm, ya know, everyone else left…
Padfoot:tosses S.T.A.B. pin to Evans:runs to Great Hall:
TrAnSfIgUrAtIoN
Prongs: Stop humming, Padfoot.
Padfoot: Okay. It's a small world after all…
Moony: Silencio.
Prongs: Thank you, Moony.
Moony: Prongs, Evans is behind you.
Prongs: Not going to fall for it this time, Moony. :smug look:
Moony: No, really, she's standing behind you. Looks like she wants your attention.
Prongs: Not listening.
Moony: Hi Lily.
Prongs:goes pale:turns around:
Moony:does counter-curse for Silencio:
Prongs:turns back around: DAMMIT!
Padfoot:high fives Moony:
McGonagall: Today, we will be doing more animal transfiguration. Turning chairs into rabbits.
Evans and Padfoot: NOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
McGonagall:continues talking:
Evans and Padfoot:hyperventilate:
Padfoot: But Minnie! Rabbits are PURE EVIL!
Evans: Really, professor, I must protest…
McGonagall:continues talking: Now, proceed
Evans:exchanges glance with Padfoot:
Padfoot:gulps:half-heartedly attempts to turn his chair into a rabbit:
Evans:pretends to look like she's trying to turn a chair into a rabbit:
Prongs:turns chair into red-eyed rabbit:
Evans and Padfoot:scream:dive behind McGonagall's desk:
McGonagall: Very good, Potter. Evans, Black, return to your seats!
Evans and Padfoot:glare at McGonagall:
McGonagall: NOW.
Padfoot: Only if you make him turn that murderer back into a chair.
McGonagall:rolls eyes: Potter, turn your rabbit back into a chair.
Prongs:turns rabbit back into chair:
Evans and Padfoot:sigh in relief:return to desks:
Padfoot:tries to turn chair into rabbit: Really, Prongs, how COULD you?
Moony: I can't believe you're terrified of rabbits to that extent.
Padfoot:glares:waves wand:turns chair into Evil Mutant Bunny:screams:
Evans:sees Padfoot's Evil Mutant Bunny:screams louder, if possible:
Both:jump into open cabinet:
Evil Mutant Bunny:green fur, red eyes, dagger-like teeth, insanely long and whip-like tongue, walkie-talkie ears, aka, the TRUE form of rabbits: I am here to dominate the human race and take over the world!
Padfoot: I knew it!
Evans:hyperventilates:
Rest of the class:stares, open-mouthed:
Evil Mutant Bunny:breathes fire:
Rest of class:run for cover:
Evil Mutant Bunny:villainous laughter:
McGonagall:tries to turn Evil Mutant Bunny back into chair:
Evil Mutant Bunny:lights McGonagall's hat on fire:
McGonagall: Bad Evil Mutant Bunny, bad!
Padfoot: Be careful Minnie!
Evil Mutant Bunny: Sod off Black!
Padfoot: It knows my name!
Evans: I have a feeling we're passing our mortal fear of rabbits on to the rest of the class :returns to hyperventilating:
Prongs: I can't believe you were right, Padfoot!
McGonagall: DIE you Evil Mutant Bunny!
Evil Mutant Bunny: BITCH! You just messed up my HAIR:breathes more fire:
Rest of the class: Oh my god we're gonna DIE!
Padfoot: I'm too pretty to die!
Padfoot's fanclub: Heck yes!
Moony: This is not happening. :looks around: Oh god, I'm stuck under a table with some fan club… What's on their jackets? OH GOD, NO!
Padfoot: Whassamatta Moony?
Moony: Besides the obvious? I'm stuck under a table with… MY fan club!
Padfoot: Sucks to be you.
Moony's fanclub:sing-songy voices: Oh, Remus…
Moony:is smothered by crazed girls while McGonagall continues to battle the Evil Mutant Bunny:
Prongs: I'll miss him, truly I will…
Padfoot: Haha!
Prongs: What could POSSIBLY be funny right now? Our teacher is fighting an Evil Mutant Bunny and we might never see Moony again!
Padfoot:snickers: Look around, Prongsie.
Prongs:looks around:sees crazed girls all around him with leather jackets that say 'James Potter Fanclub': OH. DEAR. GOD! Padfoot! Save me!
Padfoot: I'm sorry, Prongs. There's only enough room for me and the love of your life in this cabinet. Tough luck.
Prongs' fanclub:smothers Prongs:
Padfoot: I'll miss him, too. Damn, now all I've got is Wormtail. And he doesn't even HAVE Transfig with us…
Evans: We're all going to die!
Padfoot: Probably. Snog me before we go?
Evans: I'm not that far gone… yet.
Padfoot: Oh well, it was worth a shot.
Evans: Wonder where YOUR fanclub is.
Padfoot: Probably snogging yours under a table.
Evans: Too true, too true. Wonder how McGonagall's doing. :opens cupboard slightly:sees that McGonagall has fled for her life, and Evil Mutant Bunny is laughing maniacally while heading towards their cabinet: SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!
Padfoot: What?
Evans: McGonagall's deserted us, and the Evil Mutant Bunny is headed towards OUR cabinet!
Padfoot: You not serious.
Evans: No, that would be you.
Padfoot: Right…
Evans: We're gonna die! Potter! Save me!Prongs:is being smothered by his fanclub:
Evans: Oh god, our only hope… Evil Mutant Bunny: Muahahahaha! You are at my mercy!Random girl: Anyone know a good charm for an Evil Mutant Bunny?
Rest of the Class: If we did, would we BE under these tables?
Random Girl: It was worth a shot…Prongs:attempts to throw off fanclub:
Moony:is still being smothered: 78 bottles of firewhiskey on the wall, 78 bottles of firewhiskey, take one down, pass it around…
Evil Mutant Bunny: Come out come out where ever you are, my little bunnyphobics…Padfoot: Aw, shit, it's toying with us. In horror movies they ALWAYS fck with the people who are murdered in the goriest ways…
Evans: Thanks Black, I REALLY needed that just now.
Harry: EXPECTO PATRONUM!! Oh, shit, wrong era… Padfoot: Ya know, Lils, he kinda looks like Prongs… only with your eyes…Evans:shudders: Ew.
Harry: OMG, MUM! DAD!Prongs: …
Evans: … Harry: Oh, right, I'll just be… leaving, now… Evil Mutant Bunny: OH little bunnyphobics…Harry: Ooh, I KNEW I had a purpose! See, Mu… Lily, … James, you're gonna create this spell… later… ummmmmmm… oh, right! Evilus Mutante Bunnius PETUNIUS!
Evil Mutant Bunny:sprouts petunias: OMG, I'M SPROUTING PETUNIAS:bursts into flame: OMG, I'M BURSTING INTO FLAME:runs out crying:
Harry: Ummm… yeah, I was NEVER here. Got that?Padfoot:is writing on piece of parchment: Kid that looks like Prongs, only with Evans' eyes was NEVER here… got it!
Prongs: Hey, Evans, ya know what this means? Evans: Oh god, not this again… Prongs: Actually, I was gonna say we might wanna record that spell… Evans: Oh, in that case… Moony:has successfully gotten away from fanclub: Hey Padfoot, don't you think that that kid looked like Prongs and Lily? Padfoot: Yeah… I can just see it now…Evans:is yelling at Prongs: No! It was Mutante, not Mootante!
Prongs: It was bloody Mootante!Padfoot: It's like they were made for each other.
Moony: Yep. Hey, Jo, thanks for making them for each other!JK: No prob Moony, any time.
Padfoot: I can just see all the little Prongsies and Lilies… And Prongs and Lily will grow old together and I'll spoil all there kids rotten, and…JK: Wow, I kinda hate to have to tell him that Harry's their only kid 'cos they die young and he's gonna spend most of his life in Azkaban for it…
Padfoot: What was that, Jo?JK: Nothing, nothing at all…
