Alphabetised
One-shot set during Darillium
That is really offensive!" The Doctor told River, his eyebrows looking more cross than ever. His guitar lay abandoned in his lap with the strap still around his shoulders, and his sonic sunglasses were perched on the bridge of his nose as he peered over them at his wife who lounged in the armchair. "When have I ever done anything stupid or irresponsible?" He continued.
River threw her head back and laughed heartily, only serving to annoy the Doctor even more. He tried to frown at her, but only managed a pout. He hated it. He was the Doctor. He did not pout.
"Oh, sweetie," River chuckled and stood up, adjusting the Doctor's white shirt so it covered her bare legs, "I keep a list. It's alpabetised."
Putting his guitar aside, the Doctor stood up and joined River near their bed where she'd wandered to. "Oh, really?" He challenged. "Let me see this 'list'," he said, crossing his arms.
With a smirk, River went over to her backpack that lay abandoned on the floor from lack of use since they'd gone all domestic. She rummaged through it, pulling out several unuseful items, until she came across what she was looking for. The Doctor watched closely as she stood up, her back to him, then turned around with a piece of yellowing paper on her hands. The corners of it had visibly been folded then straightened out again, and there was an ink stain on the back.
"This is the first page," River stated, "the rest are at my home at the Luna University. I like to keep a little reminder of how irresponsible you are." She threw a casual wink his way and waved the paper in his face.
Annoyed, the Doctor snatched it out of her hands and pushed his sonic glasses up to read it. As his eyes skimmed over the 'A' section (it really was alphabetised), he found himself grumbling to himself. He wasn't that irresponsible, surely!
An hour later, the Doctor found himself sitting across from River in their kitchen, his arms crossed and his shades covering his eyes to hide the fact that he was glaring a hole in the table.
"'Irresponsible'," he scoffed to himself. "Doesn't warrant an alphabetised list..."
River merely smirked at him and lifted her champagne to her red lips.
