I don't think of all the misery but of the beauty that still remains.

-Anne Frank

The Beauty that Remains

As Clark Kent flew past the blurring lights below, he felt as if the whole world was standing still. This feeling used to give him hope that maybe he had the ability to stop time for maybe just a moment and change things that would otherwise be unchangeable. However, tonight he just wanted to be numb and pretend the lights were shooting stars underneath him, and that he lived in a world of isolation far from Earth where he wasn't the world's Kryptonian savior. In this imaginary world, he was1 just an onlooker, merely observing the world around him with no control over its destiny. Tears filled his eyes, but he blinked them back, unwilling to let his grief consume him. He was a victim to his greatest strength and weakness: his love for humanity. For a moment, he blocked out the cries of the world, searching for that one heartbeat that didn't see him as merely Superman, an invincible otherworldly being, but as another human who needed saving. He knew the rhythm of her heart so well because it beat in time with his, making it more unique than any other.

He floated in midair outside her bedroom window. It was open as if she had been waiting for him. Waiting for Superman. But she didn't need saving, not as this particular moment. He did. He landed carefully at the side of her bed, reaching out, needing to be held by her. As he brushed his hand across her cheek, she awoke, smiling sleepily up at him. For a second, everything was alright with the world because she, Lois Lane, was his whole world.

Seeing the pain etched in his face despite the darkness, she pulls him toward her, embracing him. His breath trembles at her neck as silent sobs escape him.

"I couldn't save her," he said quietly, his voice thick with emotion.

"You can't save everybody, Clark. You're not God." she whispered softly, caressing his neck with kisses.

"You don't understand," he continued in a whisper. "I couldn't stop her... I was so close, but I couldn't stop her," he said, closing his eyes.

Lois pulled back, searching his face. When he opened his eyes, the haunted look hidden beneath them made her heart break.

"What happened, Clark?" she asked, grabbing his hands and squeezing gently.

"I was flying over Metropolis when my hearing focused in on someone cocking a gun. I sped over to the direction of the sound, and I saw a lady in her car, crying. She had the gun pointed at her temple."

Clark stopped here, unsure if he could finish telling her what happened. Lois, who had tears in her eyes, squeezed his shoulder sympathetically. Taking a deep break, Clark continued quietly, "Her name was Ella. She had a LuthorCorp badge clipped to her business suit. When she saw me approach her, she smiled sadly and said, 'My life is not worth saving. Go save someone who deserves it. I have worked with Lex, assisting him in destroying the lives of innocent people. I have gone too far to turn back now, and I can't live with the things I've done.' As I walked closer toward her, she held out a large piece of Green Kryptonite, and I immediately felt the weakening effects but fought to remain upright."

"I tried to make her realize that taking her life wasn't the answer, saying 'Everybody makes mistakes. It is not too late to change the path you are on. Just don't do this.' She got out of her car and placed the meteor rock on my chest, draining me of all my strength.

She whispered, 'Tell my family I love them.' I watched helplessly as she put her finger on the trigger and pulled it," he finished, his voice trembling. As he sat there, shaking, his mind recalled each detail, making him feel as if he was reliving it.

Someone heard the gunshot and dialed 911. I accompanied the police as they notified the woman's family. Her husband answered the door, sinking to his knees with grief at the news of his wife's death. His children were so young, Lois. Too young to completely understand what was happening, and as they realized their mom was not coming back, their wails of anguish were too much to bear. The man looked at me with weary eyes, saying "Why couldn't you save her?"

Shame washed over me as I bowed my head and said, "I'm sorry I couldn't stop her... I tried. But don't ever doubt her love for all of you. She told me to tell you how much she loves you. It is not your fault. Her judgment was clouded by some bad decisions she made causing her to fail to see the beauty that was right in front of her."

When he finished speaking, he realized that his whole body was trembling and he collapsed against Lois, feeling both mentally and physically exhausted. He reached up to caress her face, wiping stray tears that remained on her flushed cheeks. God, she was beautiful. She closed her eyes as the sun's rays began to peak through the window. Clark lifted her off the bed and together they floated out the window toward the rising sun. They floated in midair for what seemed like hours, watching the yellow sun cast beautiful shades of orange, pink, and purple all around.

"There is so much beauty in the world; you just have to take the time to look around and really see it." Lois said, her voice barely a whisper.

Clark looked at her and smiled sadly, "I know, Lois. I just wish Ella could have realized that before it was too late."