The Disclaimer: These characters are not mine, they belong to Square and we all know this.
The Story: This is Before/After they fight and defeat Vegnagun. There is slight Tidus/Yuna and some Gippal/Rikku (just like leaning to it), but it's not the main pairing. It's a Aurikku (Auron/Rikku) with a lot of twists and turns. I mean, really. All FFX's had so many loopholes they are just that easy to play with, I think. Minus all the flashbacks, this takes place like a day after defeating Vegnagun. (They really do never rest I suppose.)
Authors Note: If you think Rikku is OOC because she's depressed, come on. We all can't be smiles and giggles, can we? ;) All feedback is welcome. No flames and constructive criticism is very welcome.
"Gullwiiiings! To your stations!!" Brother's loud voice seemed to echo through the entire airship that night, stopping the three female members of the sphere hunting group from heading into bed.
"He couldn't have said anything when we were already on the deck, could he?" Tired, Paine was already in a bitter not-to-be-messed with mood. But, they couldn't just ignore the boss' order, so they headed back to the elevator.
Once the tired trio arrived, Brother crossed his arms over his chest, trying his best to look a good leader. "Tomorrow," he paused to do some weird arm motion, "we fight Vegnagun! Be sure to get sleep. And...if anyone needs me to snuggle with..." He leaned to Yuna before Rikku violently pushed him back.
"You sicko!" She growled and turned around, heading back upstairs.
Yuna glanced to Paine with a questionable look. She had noticed during the course of the evening that Rikku had been acting funny. She was so used to her cheery nature that anything else was foreign. "You think she's ok?" Yuna quietly asked Paine as they walked from the bridge to the hallway.
"Probably not." Paine sighed and placed an hand on her hip. "Then again, with all that's going on, who would be?"
"I suppose you are right." Yuna smiled gently as they waited for the elevator to come back to their floor, Rikku already upstairs. "I'm not used to seeing her like this anymore. Except when I was on my pilgrimage, that is."
"She'll be alright." Paine stepped onto the platform and Yuna just nodded. They had a big day tomorrow and knew she needed as much sleep as she could get. When the two walked upstairs to where the beds were, she noticed that Rikku's was empty.
"Wonder where she is?" Yuna looked around, but only seen the Hypello downstairs.
"She's fine, Yuna." Paine slipped into her bed and turned the bedside light off. Yuna frowned deeply and got into her own bed. She couldn't help but worry about her Al Bhed cousin, hoping that if something was wrong, Rikku would tell her about it.
Instead of heading to the cabin, Rikku went up another level to the deck where she could spend her time writing without anyone knowing. She knew it might look suspicious since she wasn't in bed, and she had two other roommates, but she wasn't too worried about it. Before stepping out onto the deck, she opened a small compartment next to the door with her password. Inside the small space was a leather bound book and pen. She removed them both and headed outside. Since the Celsius was parked, she'd have an easier time writing without the wind blowing the pages of her journal around.
She took a seat behind on of the large lights to give her just enough illumination to see, but not too much to blind her. She opened the book and found the last page she wrote before starting to write.
Well, tomorrow is the big day. We are heading into the Farplane in search of Vegnagun and hopefully we'll defeat it. I wish the stupid thing would have stayed in Bevelle. Why in Spira did it have to go into the Farplane? I'm worried I'm going to think about him tomorrow when we get there. I had asked Shinra if there were only certain parts of the Farplane that you can see memories of people through pyreflies, but he just said, "how do I know? I'm only a kid." Some great help he is.
I'm worried about Gippal, too. I hope he's alright down there. Now that we know what happened to them in the Den of Woe, I'm worried that Shuyin's ghost is more aggressive than what is was those years ago. I want to be worried about Baralai and Nooj too, but I can't get Gippal out of my head. I suppose it was because we went on a date a year back. Nothing happened from it, though. I was in love and it wasn't with him.
I miss him so much it hurts. Every time I think back to our trip two years ago I feel my heart pound in my chest and want to sit on my bed and cry. But, what good would that do? It won't bring him back, I know this. I get angry at Yuna for thinking that she can get Tidus back sometimes. Maybe I'm angry for the fact that he could come back, and I'll be forever stuck without Auron.
Ah, Auron. Two years ago I told you right out in Zanarkand that I was in love with you and I still remember those words you said to me. "Rikku, you are just a child, you don't know love yet." To be honest, I don't think you really meant that.
I also remember back to the night on the airship, the night before we went to fight Sin. You told me you were unsent and had died when you attacked Lady Yunalesca. I was surprised at my self for not caring. I didn't love you any less. I was... I was so sad. I knew after everything was over, you'd be one. First I was going to lose my cousin, then I wasn't. Then I was going to lose you, and my world became a pit of despair. "Don't feel sad for me." You said, "I've been dead ten-years and I'm used to it." Then you chuckled. Hm, just the thought of that gives me shivers.
I do feel sad for you. I miss you. I love you. And these past two years I didn't forget about you like you thought I would. I loved you more. Not too long ago I got a sphere from Rin, which had you in it. I had taken it from Shinra and watch it atleast once a night before I go to bed.
I guess I'm writing this - like all my other entries - like a letter to you incase you do happen to come back. I want you to read it after I tell you everything first. Of course. Well, tomorrow is going to be crazy, so I should go to sleep.
Closing the book gently, Rikku looked into the night sky before standing back up. With a heavy sigh, she went back into the airship, returning the journal to the side compartment, and going down to the cabin.
Just as she was about to lay down on her bed, a small whisper made he jump. "Rikku?" Yuna turned to face her cousin, her face baring a worried expression. "Are you alright?"
"Yeah," Sitting on the bed, Rikku removed her boots before laying down. "I'm just, you know, jittery about tomorrow and all."
"I understand." Yuna paused and Rikku could tell she wanted to say more. Which she did. "You know you can tell me anything, right?" Rikku nodded and smiled.
"I'm not keeping anything from you on purpose, Yuine." Setting her head on her pillow, she looked over at her cousin and sighed. "It's just...hard to talk about right now. I want to concentrate on Vegnagun, ya know?"
"I know." She smiled back and moved her hand across the two beds to pat Rikku's arm. "When this is all over, you'll talk to me?"
"Promise!" Rikku make a salute with her hand and the two laughed before going to sleep.
