It was an evening of feast. A year had passed since the victory at the Black Gate and the lords of Middle Earth had assembled to celebrate the victory. At the big table filled with meats and wine, Eowyn was seated next to her husband. She was seven months pregnant and Faramir had wanted to stay home in Ithilien but she had claimed she was fine and she really wanted to see her friends and most of all her brother who was now King of Rohan and had been four moths married to Lothiriel.
"My love, were he not your brother, I should be very jealous. You have been staring at him since we sat at the table." Faramir said leaning over to kiss his wife's cheek.
"I do not like what I see" she replied with sadness.
"Eowyn, it is not your place to interfere"
"Then whose place is it to do so? They do not look happy. She does not look happy and Eomer has twice disappeared this evening and I think I could spot just who with…"
"My love, not everybody is as fortunate as we are. Their marriage was arranged and they may have other arrangements now. If my cousin does not scold him for … other women, you should not either. "
'Your cousin is obviously pale and unhappy. And she watches him just as closely as I am so she is not indifferent to his endeavors."
"You will not refrain from meddling, will you?" Faramir asked smiling.
"Do you mind if I go exchange seats with your cousin? I want to talk to Eomer and I am sure you would like to speak to Lothiriel. "
"Of course I do not mind, Eowyn, though I will miss you."
"Will you … talk to her? Ask her…"
"I don't know if it is my place to …"
"Faramir, she doesn't have a friend here. She should talk to somebody before she just withers away with sorrow. Yes, she should have a friend in her husband but my little brother seems to be oblivious of that and he just ignores her.'
"All right, love. I will."
….
"I can handle my own wife just fine!" Eomer frowned at his sister who was shamelessly interrogating him about his relations with Lothiriel.
"Handle her? She is not a horse, Eomer. She is a woman!"
"I know she is and I know how to handle women."
"I am sure you do, I have seen you do that to at least two of them tonight. And so did you wife."
"No, she did not. She does not pay attention to my actions. She is the perfect proper lady, she is an amazing diplomat and completely suitable for a Queen."
"Indeed she is. She was raised for it. But she is also a young woman. A beautiful one."
"She is." Eomer replied.
"So why do you go around bedding other women when you have a beautiful, young, willing wife?"
"Willing? Ha!"
"So that is the problem? She is not … willing?"
"Eowyn, these are not matters to be discussed."
"Brother, I too can be a perfect proper lady and a diplomat. But I do not feel the need to do that with you. And I will not cease talking to you about it until you tell me everything. So, is your wife reluctant to bed with you? Is that why you ignore her so?"
"She is not … reluctant. She does her duty … on occasions and I am sure that I will have an heir …'
"You talk of her as if she were a mare!"
"I know it sounds like it. But really I care for her and I respect her and I make sure she lacks nothing."
"She lacks you, brother. She is alone in your country, at your court, with your people and you left her alone in your bed as well. "
"She does not want me there …" Eomer replied in a sad voice.
"I wouldn't want Faramir either if I would see him go off to the sables with other women."
"You think she knows?"
"Of course she knows, Eomer! She is young and she is a lady and she may behave in the most proper way possible but she grew up with brothers just as I grew up with you. She is not oblivious to the needs of men. And she is always watching you …'
"She has never said anything."
"What could she say?"
"She could ask me to stop. She could ask me to her … our bed. She could just once seem like it doesn't make her sick when we do get to …"
Eowyn could see that he was upset about this too.
"Brother, you have been with a number of women. You have always caught the eye of the ladies and I have heard you were rather good at making them happy in that respect. Do you try to make you wife happy when you bed her?"
"Well, she's … different."
"So you do not. You just … mate with her for heirs? That is horrible."
"She does not complain."
"You know, brother, I would have thought you many things, but not stupid. How could she complain when she knows no other way? Was she not a maiden on your wedding night?"
"She was…"
"Then how could she know what to complain about? The only man she has ever known is you, Eomer. And even though she is very learned I doubt anyone took the time to instruct her in these matters. You cannot imagine how horrifying it is for a maiden to be with a man for the first time. It is frightening and embarrassing and painful. "
"She was very quiet ...'
"She still is very quiet. She silently cries alone and you will not go to her.'
"What if she really does not want me?" Eomer looked and his sister and she could see that indeed, the miserable state of his marriage upset him too.
"She really does, Eomer, believe me. And she would seduce you if she knew how. But she thinks you do not want her and then she sees going off with every willing wench. "
" I did not realize she knew … I tried to be discreet."
"Talk to her. Or better yet, seduce her."
"Seduce her?"
"Yes. Make her lay with you because she wants to, not because she has to. I have no doubt in my mind that you know how to do that to a woman."
"But she is … a princess."
Eowyn burst into laughter.
"And you think princesses do not enjoy being kissed? Or touched? Or teased? Do you imagine also that they cannot scream from intense pleasure?"
"Eowyn!" her brother said frowning at her.
"I don't care if this is improper. I am telling you that they can and that the little dark haired cousin of Faramir deserves to look forward to her nights in bed with her husband."
They both became silent as they saw Faramir and Lothiriel approaching.
"My dear, we should retire for the night." Faramir said taking his wife's hand into his and kissing it.
"As you wish, Milord. But I assure you I am not tired." She answered.
"I didn't mean we needed to go to sleep…" the Prince of Ithilien smiled and Eowyn blushed a little but stood up and walked away, her hand still in his.
Lothiriel was left standing beside her husband and when he looked up to her he could see how really sad she was looking at her cousin and his wife walking so close to one another and so obviously happy.
Out of nowhere, Lady Lilith appeared and placing her hand on the king's shoulder said to him:
"Will the King fancy a dance?"
Eomer instantly looked at his wife. She stood still, her face showed nothing but he could notice her nostrils swelling and on closer look he could see she was holding back tears. How could he have been so stupid as not to notice this before? He didn't know if it hurt her pride or her feelings but nonetheless it hurt her and he hated that. She was his Queen after all so he rather roughly removed the lady's hand off him and answered sharply:
"I actually do fancy a dance but with my wife".
Lothiriel looked at him startled and now the other woman's face was almost in tears as she did not expect to be turned away so bluntly. Eomer did not care. He knew Lilith well enough and she had done it to embarrass his wife and he would not have it. Instead, he got up and taking Lothiriel's hand lead her to the dance floor. She followed him silently and danced flawlessly, like any young royal woman would. Yet when he drew her a little closer to him she froze. Normally, he would let her go but now he wanted to see if she was pushing him away because she did not want him or because she wanted him too much and was mad at him. He drew her closer still until she was pressed against him and softly kissed her hair. Her reaction was something he did not expect. She started to shake and he soon realized she was crying. He wanted to let her go but she cling to him. Again, he felt stupid. His sister had been right. Lothiriel was not crying because she did not want him to touch her, she cried because she wished he would. Gently he danced her across the room and into the hallway then picked her up and carried her to their room. She leaned her head on his shoulder and was trying hard to stop her sobbing but she couldn't. He put her down as they entered the room and looked at her face. Her eyes met his for a second, before looking down again. She gathered her breath then said:
"Thank you. I am sorry for my behavior. I shall never burst publicly like that again. Please forgive me."
"Lothiriel…" he started to say but she cut him off
"You can return to the celebration now."
"I don't want to return."
"Oh… "She replied and going to the bed stood beside it, unlacing her dress.
He had never looked at her when she undressed. They had only been with each other three times since they were married and each time he felt as if he were raping her. He never dared to look at her because he knew she didn't want him and was only giving him her body because it was her duty to provide an heir for Rohan. Now he looked at her and the words of his sister were ringing in his head. How horrible must it be for her to do this with a stranger? He went over to her and took her hands in his just as she was about to take off her dress. She looked up at him with surprise and panicked not understanding what she had done wrong.
"Lothi… I am the one who should ask you for forgiveness."
She was overwhelmed. It had been months since somebody had called her that and she felt tears in her eyes again so she closed them. He pulled her dress back up her shoulders but before fastening it he placed a little kiss on her shoulder. She shivered and he picked her up in his arms again causing her eyes to open and look at him with surprise.
"I don't know what you want of me…" she said between sighs.
He put her down and leaned down to kiss her but when his lips touched hers once more he got an unexpected reaction. She violently pushed him away and turned her back to him.
"You would let me bed you but you won't let me kiss you?" he asked and she turned around looking at him with such fury that he took a step back.
"Yes, I would because I have to give you a son and I do not know of any other way to do that… and I do not say anything about your bedding somebody else tonight nor do I complain that I sleep alone; I do not even mind that you want to display affection in public so that it might be believed you actually care for me … but don't pretend to me, that I cannot stand!"
"But I do care for you, Lothi."
She went over to him and raised her arm to slap him but he caught her wrist before she could finish.
"Forgive me "she said suddenly." I do not know what came over me."
"I know what did "He replied calmly." You are angry with me"
"I am not" she answered wiping her tears.
"You will let me kiss you, then?" he asked and he could see her nostrils swell again as they did when his mistress had asked him for a dance.
"Yes. I will."
"Will you also kiss me back?"
"Yes…"
He bent to kiss her but her lips were motionless. He could see she was struggling with herself to kiss him but she would rather slap him. He had thought about talking to her but she was a far better diplomat than him so he decided the only way to get her to tell him all that she felt was to infuriate her until she would explode. So, ignoring her stillness, he took hold of her mouth and when she would not part her lips he bit her lover lip, forcing her to let him in. She was breathing faster and he wasn't sure if it was from passion or fury but the two are always so closely knit together that he did not really care. He wrapped one arm around her waist and took the back of her head into his other hand so that now she was completely in his power. Eventually he felt she really could not go on any more and released from the kiss but not from his tight grip. Her face was flushed and it was obvious she felt like crying. He went for another kiss but she whimpered:
"Please … don't…"
He smiled and loosened the hold he had on her, moving both his arms around her waist and allowing her to get a little away from his body.
"Lothi…"
"Don't call me that!" she shouted. "It's too… informal"
He unfastened the ribbons of her dress and pulled it down from her. She was standing in a satin under dress that revealed all the curves of her body.
" Is this informal enough that I can call you by your pet name?" he asked and even though he did see her raise her arm again, this time he did not catch it and let her slap him.
"I'm… I'm… Milord… I … "she stammered.
"Still not sufficiently informal for you to call me by my first name, Milady?"
"What do you want from me?" she shouted
"This" he replied. "I want you to shout at me, and beat me and deny me your lips and your body."
"Why?" she asked in a trembling voice "Do you want to repudiate me?"
"By Valar, no! I want to be married to you."
"But … you are …"
"Lothi… "He started and this time she had nothing to say about it "we have started this all wrong. I have been a bad husband to you and did not even know it."
"You thought keeping a mistress is … good?" she hissed at him.
He was surprised.
"I'm… I will not … do that anymore. I promise you. "He said and looked at her to see her reaction. He wished to know how she really felt about their being together but did not know how to ask that so he just looked into her eyes. She felt the awkward question in his gaze and tried to answer it.
"I will … I am… you can always … when you want to …"
"Do you want to?" he asked
"Of course I do, it is my…"
"Please do not say 'duty'…"
She swallowed and looked at him. It was her duty. But she also liked it when she felt his skin on hers and when he … She blushed thinking about it. He had always been careful with her, always making sure she was ready for him when he took her and always very gentle. Too gentle … she thought.
"I … like it…" she finally said in such a low voice that he could barely hear her. But he did and he could not remember when he had last been so happy. He went over to her and leaned down to kiss her.
"Don't worry, I will not smother you like before, I was just trying to get you to react then. "He said and gently pressed his lips against hers. And yet again, she surprised him when her tongue intruded between his lips in a rush of passion, making him understand that she also liked being smothered. So he complied with her eagerness and without releasing from the kiss he picked her up and took her to their bed. He removed her satin undergarment and took a step back to look at her naked body. She instinctively covered what she could with her arms. He smiled and nearing her indulged in another kiss. Her hands found their way under his tunic and he realized she had never before touched him. She always allowed him to do whatever he pleased with her body but she never claimed his. It felt good. For the first time he felt like he had a wife. He helped her take all of his clothes off and he smiled when her hand almost caressed his now very erect manhood. She stopped and hoped he would not notice. He did but was not going to make a fuss about it. He could see her gaze turned away from his body yet trying to peak at the lower part of him every so often.
"You can look straight at it, you know" he said smiling
"Oh I … "she blushed looking into his eyes.
He took a few steps back and waited for her to gain the courage to look at him. She finally did and her eyes hungrily inspected his muscular body, resting a while longer on his groin.
"So that is what you stabbed me with on our wedding night" she finally said and he was pleasantly surprised at her indecency.
"It is. That must have been very unpleasant for you. I am sorry." He came back to her and led her to their bed, pulling the covers and lying next to her.
"It wasn't all that unpleasant. It was mostly embarrassment because I did not know what to do and you seemed so … formal"
"I didn't know what to do either …" he confessed
"That I will not believe." She laughed
"I am not lying to you, Lothi. True, I had been with women. But never with a princess…whom I had married."
"I'm sorry I was so stiff…"
"Oh, Lothi, you really should not be the one apologizing for our wedding night. You were completely inexperienced and I chose to ignore that."
"You didn't ignore that. You were very careful with me … I don't think you enjoyed that at all. I don't think you have ever enjoyed bedding me. I'm sorry"
He kissed her softly before whispering into her ear:
"Why don't we stop apologizing to each other and enjoy ourselves?"
She felt a rush of blood to her cheeks.
"I still don't know how to please you, Milord."
"Well" he started while cupping her right breast with his hand and leaning towards it with his lips ready to capture the reddened bud "it would please me if you stopped calling me your lord"
"Oh…"
When his lips touched her skin she gasped. It felt incredibly good but she did not know how to handle the new sensations that swept through her body and she froze. He felt her go stiff in his arms and stopped the sweet torture of her breasts bringing his face up and kissing her lips. That she had become comfortable with and she knew how to respond. Her mouth opened to him and allowed his tongue to explore. Sensations unknown before took hold once more of her body and she had to admit that her breasts longed to feel once more the velvety moisture of his lips. Suddenly she realized that though his mouth was still covering hers his tongue no longer roamed. Again, she was at a loss what to do and as things stood she could not possibly ask him. But evidently she had to do something so after assessing briefly the situation she buried her hands in his golden hair and shyly pushed up her tongue into his mouth. A sound of approval came from him and she smiled. In a swift movement he rolled together with her so now she was over him, her kiss growing bolder. This was all right, she thought. She could follow his lead if he indicated what he wanted. It resembled dancing except that in this she was not supposed to take lessons from anybody else. She giggled at that thought and he trapped her tongue for a moment making her aware that she was not giving her full attention to her current lesson. His hands caressed her back and very slowly made their way down to massage her bottom. She didn't stir or protest and he wasn't even sure if she felt what other parts of him were doing while she was so determined not to let any spot of his mouth unclaimed by hers. He only wished her mouth would be equally eager on other parts of him. But it was too early to ask that of her and he wondered if he would ever dare ask her at all. It was true that by the time they were wed his rank was higher than hers but still he was a warrior of Rohan who came to the throne only because the rightful King, his cousin, had died in battle. Lothiriel was a real princess, born and bred, the kind of a woman he could have never held claim to… He was starting to grow uncomfortable and his hands drew back, resting on her hips. She released his lips and looked into his eyes quizzically. So she was aware of his touches. He could see desire in her green eyes and remembered his sister's words; princesses did like to be touched and teased and they did deserve to be given pleasure. Especially this particular princess who was now his Queen, his wife, his woman.
"Why did you stop?" she asked in a trembling voice. "Did I do something wrong?"
"No, Lothi, you haven't. I have difficulties making love to your title."
She looked at him with surprise; it wasn't what he had said but the phrase 'make love' made her heart jolt.
"You are not making… she swallowed … that to my title but to me." She said and seeing his smile at her reluctance to say that word made her hide her head between his shoulder and neck, inhaling the masculine scent of his skin.
"That?" he asked in mirth and she giggled against his skin still not lifting her curly head but taking hold of his hands and pushing them downwards.
"Yes, Milady" he said playfully while he resumed his ministrations.
"Don't call me that." She said raising herself on her arms and looking into his eyes.
"All right, my love." He replied and delighted in the way she blushed. "May I call you that?"
She nodded and let herself slide down kissing his chest and feeling his wanting manhood pressed against her.
"I want to please you." She whispered. "Show me how".
He cast away the first thought that came through his mind when he heard her. He would not ask her to do that yet. But he could show her that pleasure as he definitely felt no shyness or apprehension about it.
With a swift move he rolled with her and she wiggled a bit to find her place under him. He placed a soft kiss on her lips then whispered in her ear:
"All right, I will show you what I like if you promise to be honest with me about what you like."
" I will" she said even though she had no idea what he meant by that until his mouth started to trail kisses across her body making her sigh and shiver of pleasure. The moment she felt his beard tickle her thighs she gasped and when his hands were encouraging her legs to part she felt rather reluctant to do so. He did not rush her but neither did he let go and eventually she had to give in. The thought that his face was so close to her core made the blood rush to her cheeks and she tried to pull herself up a little but he took hold of her hips and with one move pulled her right into his mouth and his tongue hungrily started to stroke her moist flesh. She screamed in surprise and then moaned loudly, feeling both wonderful and embarrassed, her head wishing he would stop, her body hoping he wouldn't. She was trying hard to be quiet but found it impossible and as his rhythm ascended so did her cries and she tried to bury her mouth in the pillows so she would muffle them. He felt her whole body trembling as her pleasure was growing towards its peak and then she finally reached it screaming out his name while trying to raise herself enough for her hands to push him away.
She collapsed back into the pillows and put her hand over her mouth. He laughed and gathered her into his arms kissing her hair.
"I will never be able to face anybody who was in Meduseld tonight" she said catching her breath.
"Now, now, I'm sure not everybody heard you. Some of the maids are rather old and probably deaf".
She chuckled and looked up at him.
"You deceived me."
"how did I do that?"
"You told me you would show me what your pleasure was and instead you…"
"I … what?" he asked with mirth
"You know what you did."
"Of course I do but I would like to hear you say it."
"You showed me my pleasure instead. Though I have the feeling that my reciprocation of your … actions would bring you enjoyment as well"
He looked at her in surprise.
"I do have three brothers, Eomer, and they are rather shameless. I did hear a lot of … things about the pleasures of men." She explained when she saw the look on his face. "Which does not make me any more able to bring them about…" she continued as the thought that he might want her to reciprocate right then.
He laughed softly and again rolled on top of her so she would understand his real intention.
"Thank you." She whispered into his ear and lifted her knees, locking her ankles around his waist.
This was new to Eomer. A woman honestly thanking him for making love to her … and not any woman but the one he held a duty to make love to. He gently pushed into her and started to move with careful thrusts. Her hands were tracing across his back and as she felt again her pleasure growing she put all modesty aside and said
"I will not break if you take me harder"
He stopped altogether and looked at her. She was red as poppies and avoiding his gaze whimpered
"I'm sorry, I did not mean it like I was complaining … I just …" She swallowed as tears were forming in the corners of her eyes.
He took her hands in his and brought them onto the pillow pinning them down. There was so much desire in his eyes that it almost frightened her. When he plunged into her forcefully she screamed and he could read her contentment. Encouraged by this his rhythm grew and his thrusts earned loud moans of pleasure until finally he felt his release was close and instinctively pulled out of her spilling all over her thighs. Now it was him who hid his face in the pillow and din not dare look at her. He didn't know how he would explain to her why he had pulled out.
"I'm not sure yet if I should be upset or flattered at the fact that you mistook me for one of your mistresses." She said and indeed her voice sounded undecided. So she knew why he had done it …
"Forgive me." He finally said resting his head on his elbow and looking at her." Believe me, I did not mistake you for anybody but I admit it has been a habit for me not to …"
"I can imagine. It would be unwise for the King to have illegitimate children."
"The King will have no other children that those of his beautiful Queen for he will not…" a finger on his lips stopped what he was saying.
"Do not make promises you cannot keep." Lothiriel said and he could see sadness on her face. She was still unsecure of how he felt for her.
Eomer rolled off the bed and went over to one of the big closets taking a towel and returned to his wife who was still on the bed, keeping her eyes closed and visibly fighting back tears. He placed a soft kiss on her knee and said:
"Spread"
She flung her eyelids open and sat up in bed hugging her knees. He smiled at her.
"Again a paradox. You will allow my mouth but not my hands?"
The blood rushed to her cheeks and she reached for the towel. He gave it to her but held her in his gaze as she cleaned herself with obvious embarrassment.
"I don't think you understand how utterly beautiful and desirable you are to me.' He finally spoke.
She looked straight into his eyes with anger. If she could voice it, he knew she would ask him to go away and leave her alone. She would cry, he knew that also. He wanted to reassure her but also wanted her to talk to him. He wanted her to let out all her anger, to be honest with him even if it meant an argument. Again he decided to get her so upset that she would burst so he got up from the bed, put on his leggings and his shirt and left the room. He was counting on the fact that she would not expect him to return thus she would not lock the door. He went back to his room and his heart ached a little knowing how Lothiriel must feel left there naked and alone on the bed but he decided it was for the better as he made a solemn vow to himself it would be the last time he would ever leave her like that.
For the first few seconds she felt relief that he had gone. She wanted him gone so she could have her peace. Yet after that first moment she began to feel alone and desperate. She was cold and she should have put something on but she could not move. She hated him for seducing her the way he had. He should have just claimed his right as her husband and let her be. He didn't need to kiss her the way he did and he definitely did not have to …blood rushed to her cheeks as she could not state even in her mind what his lips and tongue had done to her. Suddenly the thought that he did that to so many others was so unsettling that she started to cry with desperate sobs burying her head in the pillow that smelled so much like him. That moment she hated him with all that she had yet all she wished for was to feel his touch again. Yet when she did it startled her so that she jumped up and screamed. In her fit she did not hear him come back in the room and now that he had caught her so off guard all she could to was hit him. She clenched her fists and pounded desperately his shoulders and his chest. He let her punch him till she was out of breath and when she eventually stopped and lay back into the pillows covering her face with her hands and sobbing uncontrollably he said simply :
"It's all right."
He allowed her to collect herself and remove her hands then handed her a robe which she took without words and getting up wrapped herself in it.
"Please leave" she said in a calm and determined voice.
'I will not. I'm spending the night with you.'
"No." she said but the voice was trembling.
"It is not negotiable.'
"You would not force me. " she said looking angrily into his eyes. That she was sure he would not do.
"True. I did not mean I will make love to you again tonight. Just that I will go to bed with you."
"No.'
"Yes."
"Why?"
"Because we are married and neither of us should be sleeping alone.'
"your not sleeping alone does not necessarily include me" she hissed at him.
"Yes it does. I never lie, Lothiriel. And when I say I will never do that again, I mean it."
She was melting under his gaze but she felt vulnerable and hated it.
"What if I want you to do that again so you would leave me alone?"
Anger flamed up in his amber eyes.
''Do you?" he asked stressing every word.
She looked down. Yes, her aim was to disconcert him. Yet she felt that it was this particular conversation that would set the course of their marriage and she could not get herself to tell him that she wished for him to keep mistresses. She really didn't. But she didn't trust that he would keep his word and be faithful to her.
"Well?" he asked in a very serious voice.
"No" she replied in no more than a whisper.
"Good." His voice was softer now. 'I am relieved to hear that."
"I'd still want you to go now. At least for a little while. Please."
He took her into his arms and kissed her hair. At first she was stiff and then she wrapped her arms around him and cling to him with utter desperation.
"I will never leave you again, Lothi. As long as I am in Edoras you will not be sleeping alone."
That finally did it. She just burst into tears uncontrollably and he felt that at last she was at ease to be honest with him. She allowed him to see how she felt and it made him feel wonderful as he knew her tears were of release and once she will let them all out she would be happy. He caressed her hair and whispered comforting words into her ears until she was calm again and her sobs stopped.
"May I stay now?" he asked and she nodded.
"You can stay but I need a moment." She said letting go of him and disappearing towards the washroom.
