Fred's Quest

Disclaimer: Scooby Doo and all related characters are owned by Hanna-Barbara, Warner Bros., and/or Cartoon Network. All other characters, names, places and incidents are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, events, locals is coincidental.

Chapter One: Love is Shopping with her in mind
May you find comfort in the thought
that sorrow, grief and woe
Are sent into our lives sometimes
to help our souls to grow
For through the depths of sorrow
comes understanding love *

Part One: The Door

He had made this trip many times. He knew each step backwards and forwards but this was the first time he had made the trip with what he carried in the plastic bag. He had tried so many times and failed each time. He had let her down once again last night. Worse, he had let himself down. That couldn't be allowed to happen again. The door he stood in front of was ajar; he wondered if that was carelessness or an invitation? An invitation he hadn't taken advantage of; she wasn't careles?

He had seen her on the beach many times in her bikini that made his blood run hot. She had gently but efficiently snubbed any unwanted advances made by guys on the sand. He even carried a picture of her in that very bikini, hidden away in his wallet. The problem he had was that he didn't know what love was or what she wanted. That was what this trip was about.

With quivering nerves and a sense of impending doom, he reached out a trembling hand to push the door open and Fred Jones entered the bedroom of Daphne Blake.

Part Two: The List

The noise was irritating as well as maddening. Daphne had never used an alarm clock mainly because of that pestering noise. If she had a hammer she'd finish off the noise once and for all but since no hammer presented itself, her hand would have to do.

The exasperating noise ended with a forceful slap. With no mysteries on either horizon, Daphne had hoped for a morning of uninterrupted sleep. Who had turned on her alarm clock? Had some one sneaked into her room while she slept? She shuddered under the thick blankets at the thought.

Those questions were answered when she touched the apple sitting beside the now silent clock. And the note being held down by the apple. She turned on the table lamp and settled under the covers.

"Apple for my favorite teacher." She read, "What is love?" I'd like you to teach me what love means to you."

Daphne wasn't quite sure how to take the note. Fred had always been shy, was this his way of shedding the 'little shy boy' image? Or was he asking about that three letter word? Daphne had never seen herself as a sex ed teacher so some clarification would be necessary. Whichever Fred had in mind, she was happy he had finally taken a step, if a short one.

She was still unhappy about last night. The four of them had gone out to dinner, that wasn't the problem. Daphne sighed, thinking back at what happened when the gang had returned. She had held back, hoping for some time with Fred. They ended up alone; she had puckered her lips, leaning her head in the right angle for a good night kiss...and he'd kissed her on the forehead and opened the door.

And now this note.

Showered and dressed, Daphne entered the dinning area, finding she was the last to appear, "Good morning, everyone." Taking a cup of coffee, she looked at Fred, "Freddie, I need to talk to you."

She led him away, hopefully beyond earshot, "Fred, what did you mean by leaving this in my bedroom?"

"I just want to get to know you, you know, as a person. And who better to do that than you."

"I don't know if I want to do this...we've known each other a long time as friends but to know someone on a deeper level is a whole different ballgame. Love is a four letter word, not a three letter one. You aren't asking about that three letter one, you know, starts with 'S', ends with 'X'?"

"No, of course not, Daph." A silent, uncomfortable moment followed then Fred added nervously, "Well, the thought had crossed my mind...a time or two."

"Forget it, Fred. That isn't happening any time soon. Now that we got that elephant out of the room, you need to know that to love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer. To suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy then is to suffer. But suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down." **

"Too much happiness...got it...I think."

"Love is shopping for her, or me, in this case..."

"Shopping? Oh, no..."

"Then I guess you don't love me. I guess I'll have to go myself." She sounded so downcast.

"I l...lo...I'd love to go shopping for you."

"Good," her eyes twinkled in delight, "Here is a list."

"Shaggy, Scooby, come on. We've got to go shopping." He didn't sound at all enthusiastic about shopping but it was for Daphne.

"You sent Fred shopping?" Velma asked after Fred, Shaggy and Scooby had left.

"Take a look at this." Daphne handed over the note Fred had left in her bedroom.

"Note plus shopping...you didn't...?" Velma smirked.

"I did. If Fred wants to know about love..." Daphne smiled evilly.

"You are so wicked. I wish I'd known, I could use some "supplies" myself."

"Don't worry, I have plenty and you can have whatever Fred brings back. Besides, it's time Fred learned what we girls through for our boy friends."

"Thanks, it's going to be interesting to see how he handles this quest."

Part Three: Commissions

Fred hadn't even looked at the list Daphne had given him until he had gotten into the Mystery Machine, waiting for Shaggy and Scooby while the van warmed up. His eyes bugged out as he skimmed down the items. Did she honestly expect him to fill this listing of personal provisions? From sanitary napkins to bath/shower gel, it appeared she hadn't forgotten a thing. The only plus was the note she left at the bottom as to where the provisions could be found.

Three traffic citations later the van turned into the Coolsville Shopping Center.

-Xxx

As a pharmacy technician Brianna Granger drew a nice salary plus commissions on her sales. She enjoyed the job and she liked all the people she met. Long blond hair with a body like a million dollars, all deposited in the right banks; Brianna knew this and enjoyed the interest shown by her few male customers. She also didn't mind taking advantage of this interest in padding her commission bonus.

She smiled broadly when she noticed two men, one as blond as herself, the other brown haired. The blond headed her way while the other headed for the bakery department. No other customers seemed to be interested in her domain so she quickly opened the top three buttons of her pale silk blouse.

"Good morning, may I help you?" Blondie was understandably nervous and looked bewildered as he ventured down the aisle of the unknown. Not many of her male customers were calm and collected.

"Yaobang dabble." Brianna flashed her brightest smile, a fat paycheck danced in her head as she took the offered paper.

"You are a brave soul coming down this aisle. These for your wife?"

"Nowifegirl friend." Mumbled Fred with no idea what he had just said.

"Does your girlfriend have a favorite brand?"

"Brand? Ihavenoidea." Fred wondered why the building felt so warm.

"We have several different brands, for light days, heavy days, or just in case. I'd suggest these." Brianna dropped four packages into the cart. By the time the list had been filled, the cart was half full.

The purchases paid for, Shaggy joined Fred as they walked out to the van. "Shaggy, what just happened?"

"You tell me. I thought you did great."

Brianna stepped away from the cash register, satisfied with her sale, it was time for a break.

"Everything go okay?" A co-worker asked.

"Fine. Just don't ask Blondie what color my eyes are."

TBC

* Partial poem by Helen Steiner Rice from "Daily Bouquets", Fleming H. Revell Co., 1990.

** Woody Allen, "Love and Death", 1975.