My Iron Woman
Rating: K+
Spoiler: none
Pairings: Leo Valdez/Piper McLean
Summery: "I think I'm gonna name him Bruce." "I'm not naming my child after a man-whore who dresses up as a bat." "Did you just insult Batman?" "Pretty much." "It's okay. He's the hero Gotham deserves, but not the one it needs right now. So we'll - " "Remind me, why did we marry in the first place?" "You needed someone to buy the groceries." Piper and Leo in their 30's!
Credit for picture: Burdge
The chocolate skinned woman tries drying her tangled hair in front of a crooked mirror. The hair drier dies without warning, causing her to scowl and turn around just to see a freckled girl chewing its wire. The girl beams and – as politely as possible – spits the wire, handing it to her mother.
Piper accepts the wire and after struggling for a bit turns it on.
The girl has black hair, darkest hair she's ever seen. Her eyes are big and brown – almost perfect for giving the puppy eyes. Not that Piper minds it though. She's around four and at her best, one foot above Piper's knee.
Hair drier turns off again and Piper's hair is as wet as it can be. And to make it worse, she has to be in her office in about 30 minutes; which is just enough to avoid a crisis or stop certain people from setting the house on fire.
She kneels down to be at the same height as the little girl. "Patricia, did you touch this?" she holds the hair drier up. Patricia nods apologetically. That usually indicates it's broken. Everything Patricia touches dies.
Piper gives up on drying her hair hoping it'll dry out itself. So she kisses Patricia's forehead and opens her closet to pick out an outfit.
But the explosion that shakes the house has the perfect timing. At first the hall is mostly smoke and ash; the mother and daughter exchange a look that means you think there are any survivors?
They don't have to wait long though. A figure rushes from the smoke, but seems unharmed. He sticks his head into the room –it's sticky with sweat and half burned something. He coughs and says "it's good. We're good. Just a- uh- wrong-um- we're good, alright?" in the most assuring tune he can manage.
Piper knits her eyebrows but shrugs and moves on. It Leo's screwed up anything it's gonna show up sooner or later. In this case, it's sooner.
Someone (Something?) rushes in the room in a shady suit. Whatever he's wearing is muffling his screams. He's about half size of Leo, and he doesn't seem to be able to stop running around the room screaming – which of course, is understandable since he's on fire.
Piper picks up a bucket full of water (which you'd be surprised to know was there in the first place. But after getting to know the Valdez family a bit you'll get it) and empties It on the boy; who lets out a sigh of relief, gets on his knees and face plants himself on the ground.
While Leo is checking on the boy –Lucero- Piper glares at him. Leo doesn't look up though, and just helps Lucero up to get on his feet. "The suit is fireproof. Everything was under control. He was just a bit… freaked out." Leo mumbles under his breath. Piper tries to give him the hardest look she has –because really who would dare mess with her son? - But something catches her attention.
"Is that the Iron Man suit? 12-14 size?" Piper asks. Lucero finally gets out of the suit and grins. Father and son's grins are so alike it's almost scary. Though Lucero has her mother's eyes, which are every color ever. His skin tone and curly hair is like his dad's. Except his hair's light brown. He has two crooked teeth in front that are somehow cute when he grins.
"Yep. Handmade and almost ready to use!" Leo high-fives Lucero and Piper's kind of scared to ask "ready to use… for what?" she can't say she's not relived when Patricia jumps and hugs Leo's legs. "Can I be Iron Man too? Pretty please? Please please please…" she asks with enthusiasm.
"B-But you can't be Iron Man! He's a guy… I suppose you could be Iron Woman. If that's even a thing." Lucero says, thoughtfully.
"Nope. Man and woman marry. Super-woman and Super-man. Spider-man and Spider-Woman. I don't wanna marry Lucero!" Patricia wrinkles her nose.
"Not necessarily. Bat-woman's a lesbian and she kicks –um- butt." Leo tries cheering her up.
"Thanks Leo, I'll take it from here." Piper presses her lips together. She can't help but add…
- And none of them marry by the way.
- How would you know that?
- 'cause I read the comics.
- I knew I married you for a reason!
Lucero isn't very happy when his dad plants a kiss on his mom's lips –There are certain things he doesn't want to see his parents doing- But Patricia is delighted.
This doesn't last long. Leo gets a call telling him he's late for work, and Piper remembers she has 10 minutes to get ready for work.
Leo's about to grab whatever shirt that's nearer 'till he sees his wife's hair is still dripping wet. "Are you gonna show up like that?" Piper checks herself in the mirror.
- Oh shit!
- MOM!
- Mommy didn't curse, okay?
- But you did. I heard you!
Lucero comes to her rescue and they start fighting about who gets to eat the last bowl of Froot Loops. The two start running after each other in the almost-free-of-smoke hallway.
Piper sets her attention back to her freaking hair. "You know Beauty Queen, I could fix that." Piper turns around and sees Leo's hands are on fire.
- You're gonna set my hair on fire? Like you did on our honeymoon? I'll pass.
- What? No – I wasn't gonna – will you just let me dry your hair?
- OK.
- Eighty one Mississippi, Eighty two Mississippi, Eighty three-
- Piper.
- Can I open my eyes now?
Thankfully, she opened her eyes to see a perfectly dried and not-burnt-at-all hair. Leo gave a condescending grin. "I've gotta go, catch you later!" Leo shouted while he was halfway in the hallway.
- Leo! Hold on. You're forgetting something!
- What?
- Pants, Leo. Pants…
- Good point!
A/N: Here's why I think Leo and Piper are gonna be endgame: I don't hate Jasper, But after Piper wanted Jason to wish to "be together forever" It felt overly possessive, and honestly childish. I think of those two as a puppy love. Then again it's just my opinion. Leo would love his beauty queen either way. Piper wouldn't have to second guess herself with Leo, like she says she does with Jason. Plus there aren't many people who can put up with Leo's craziness and somehow control him from doing something stupid.
Oh, and the names I used: Patricia and Lucero are Spanish, meaning Noble and light. (In that order)
Did you like it? Should it be multi-chapter or a one-shot? Whatever it is you're thinking feel free to drop a review!
