Summary: It's unfair that Dick had given her everything and the only thing she can give in return is herself.
Notes: Unbeta'd. May be bad writing; haven't done this in a while. Rated T because they're adults and have sex.
everything.
by Pseudonym P
Zatanna finds the Boy Wonder very… endearing.
Robin is shy at first and it's cute, but as time goes on he proves to be as mischievous as he is charming. They click almost instantly, his wordplay making her smile, and she takes it as a challenge to go toe-to-toe with him. He never misses a beat, and it's the ebb and flow of banter that makes her comfortable.
When he hovers closer to her when he says something directed only at her, she turns her head toward him.
She never took Robin as the type to be generous with compliments.
He shoots her a thumbs up during the training sessions she joins or compliments her skill in passing, and she's not unaware of the awed faces he makes when she smoothly pulls off a spell. Either she's really good at hiding how much of a novice she truly is to her craft, or his mask is doing really terrible things to his vision.
In the middle of the battle with Red Tornado, he manages to bound over to her and make a pass at her. She's kind of impressed with his timing, and even if the pick up line was bad, she lets it slide, because she kind of likes him.
He is the first person she cries to.
She felt him a safe distance away since her father had become Doctor Fate, and at first it was putting her on edge, but she came to revel in it, like a mattress you had to break in. He hovered not to near and not too far, so when the time came and she reached for him, he was ready to catch her.
They are fourteen when she first kisses him.
She remembers vividly that his lips were chapped, moisture lost as he tossed and turned in the air, both to attack and defend. His hands curled around her waist, not too low and modestly warm. They're inexperienced, but he takes the time to get to know her mouth—a charming feat.
"Happy new year, Z," he whispers when they pull apart.
She smiles and leans back in, returning the greeting against his lips.
She had always thought that he was simply a giant flirt, but realizes that between him and Wally, that was the speedster's department. After years of knowing Robin—now Nightwing, she reminds herself gently—that it's part of his charisma, the banter and wit and charm.
When he's in casual wear and he takes off his sunglasses to tell her his name and ask her out on a real date, the blue of his eyes and the sincerity of his words compel her to say yes.
He's not her first love, but he is her true love.
In between the League and the Team, they'd called things off. Until, he promised, things had settled down. She got accepted and Wally and Artemis are in college, so there are a bunch of new recruits that need training and Dick is the perfect mentor, if she did say so herself.
They fool around sometimes, because to be perfectly honest, sex with him was amazing, and she still loves him, but committing to a relationship took time she did not have. The stress of being apart when you know you're supposed to be together is something she cannot handle. Having a boyfriend you were forbidden to talk to while he was on an assignment for six months, even magically, didn't exactly constitute a healthy relationship.
But when she catches wind of his nine-month assignment to Prague, she is furious. She is furious at the League, at Batman, at him. She is furious with herself, because Nightwing is in Prague alone, Nightwing is in Prague alone and captured, and she is furious with Batman for putting the mission above his own son.
She calls him out during a League meeting, three days after Nightwing's capture, spitting and angry and demanding to be sent, and if he didn't let her, God damn it, she'd find a way with or without the League's help. Doctor Fate flinches at her words, and it doesn't even faze her.
Batman's eyes narrow in the slightest, and Wonder Woman is assigned, as well, to Nightwing's retrieval.
A month after she brings him back, he comes into her apartment and sets a hot kiss on her mouth.
Zatanna hadn't been touched in a year—the only guy she let in between her legs got himself captured in Prague for a time—but when he pulls away and tells her that they need to talk, she lets him talk.
It's quiet for the longest of moments, before he sighs. "I'm sorry, Z."
She's confused. She watches his face, now free of bruises, as if the kisses she'd lain on them made them vanish. He looked more like himself again, instead of the hollow, tired man she'd carried home.
Dick says nothing but kisses her again, slowly angling his body to lean over her, pushing her down into her couch cushions. He repeats apologies as he kisses her mouth, and she knows he thinks he will say something she will not like.
"What for?" she finally asks, and he tells her.
Her stomach both sinks and floats at the same time, the shock sending her heart pounding against her chest. His blue eyes don't look away from hers, and she swears they are amulets, talismans granted with magic, because she has never felt more alive, more powerful than at this moment.
"Yes, Dick," she whispers finally, hot tears welling up into her eyes and dripping down her face and to her hair. She pulls him down to kiss him. "Yes."
Their relationship is not a typical one.
It's an unspoken rule that they are each other's and no one has said or done anything to disagree, so it stands.
They were friends first, then lovers, then friends-yet-lovers, but all this time they were confidantes, companions. They understood each other through their losses and laughs, and unwittingly became devoted to each other. They knew their aliases (well, she knew their aliases) before their persons, and they built the trust through kisses and words and actions.
Dick Grayson is a rich man. He is an enviable man. He had given her everything she had asked for and everything she didn't. There are secrets he keeps but they are not his, so she doesn't pry. He willingly tells her everything else.
But more than that, he is devoted.
From the mundane everyday life of Chinese take out to life-threatening missions in China, he is there, fighting his own mentor tooth-and-nail in order to be by her side. There are too many instances like Prague for both of them. There are some things he is not willing to give up, he had said when she asked.
He looks her straight in the eye when he'd said it, and she knows why Wally and Artemis left the life they had for the love they'd made.
White fits her well.
She's staring at the dress for the billionth time, and the only thing she can think of is Oh God, will he even like this?
Artemis, who knows her well, scoffs and says, "Dick will love it, Z. Almost as much as he'll love taking it off you."
Raquel and M'gann hoot in the background in their lilac bridesmaids gowns, champagne glasses in hand. Zatanna has the decency to blush, because even though everyone knows they're sleeping together—they're getting married, for God's sakes—she was still raised Catholic.
Bruce comes into her dressing room to place a tender kiss on her forehead. "How are you feeling?"
She smiles at him through the mirror. "Nervous. Excited."
"Happy?" Bruce asks.
"Dick always makes me happy," she says, voice small but honest and sincere. It makes the man who'd treated her like a daughter smile.
But he says something that confuses her. "Dick wanted me to drop off a present."
Her brow crinkles, but when the door opens again her jaw is slack and her eyes well up with tears she know will ruin her make up. But she can't bring herself to care.
"Daddy?"
It's unfair that Dick had given her everything and the only thing she can give in return is herself.
Her make up was ruined instantly, but a quick spell from her father—her father, who she had not seen since she was fourteen years old—sets it back in place, and he wipes his daughter's tear-stained cheeks with his thumbs.
"My darling girl," he says, voice cracking. Everyone leaves the room almost immediately.
She is crying again, tears pouring down her face. "H-How—"
"Dick," he says, and her heart flies at the mention of his name. "I'm so proud of you, Zatanna."
"Daddy," she sobs, clinging unto her father.
"You've chosen a good man," Zatara whispers into her hair, and she cannot control her tears, because they have been waiting and waiting and waiting for this moment, for this dream come true.
Dick knows how much it would mean to her if her father walked her down the aisle.
"I love him so much," she hiccups, overwhelmed with emotion. "I—I love him, Daddy."
Zatara laughs, tears making his own eyes glassy. "I know, sweetheart. I know."
Today is the best day of her life, and she cannot stop crying.
Seeing Dick at the end of the aisle makes her heart want to burst. When her father walks her to her fiancé, he lays a hand on Dick's shoulder.
"Take care of her," is all Zatara says, and Dick nods.
Zatanna takes Dick's hand in hers and launches herself forward, hugging him. "I love you," she sobs, because today is the best day of her life, and she cannot stop crying.
Dick laughs, but it's choked. "I love you, too, Z. With everything in the world."
(It takes a while, because she simply cannot stop crying, but they get married, and Zatanna Zatara-Grayson is officially the happiest woman on this side of the galaxy.)
Unlike cliché honeymoons, they do not sneak off.
They dance and party and eat, and she's granted a dance with her father. He whispers in her ear as they sway how Dick had talked to Fate, how Dick had bargained, how Dick had begged. "He just wanted you to have what you wanted the most," Zatara said, and Zatanna bites her lip to keep her from crying.
"He's good for me, isn't he, Dad?" she says meekly, and her father kisses her forehead.
"There is no better man for you, sweetheart," he says earnestly, and spins her into her new husband's arms.
Her father bids them goodbye with a final embrace, and Dick shakes his hand. Zatara leaves, and Zatanna wants to kiss Dick for making sure that she doesn't see her father put on Fate's helmet again.
So she does.
The day is too much for her, so she takes off her shoes and her dress and slips into old sweats of Dick's in the bathroom of their honeymoon penthouse suite in Maui, slightly nervous about telling Dick that she's really just too cried out for sex tonight.
When she steps into the living room, he's already queued the next season of the show she'd been putting off watching and and prepared Chinese take out along with two tubs of ice cream, because ironically enough, even if it was their wedding, they barely got to eat.
Her eyes well up again and she lunges for him, crushing him in a hug and peppering kisses all over his face. "I love you, Dick Grayson," she breathes, her chest feeling light.
He smiles up at her. "I love you, too, Zatanna Zatara-Grayson."
They hunker down and dive into the take out, eyes glued to the TV. They get through five episodes before she spells the food to not go stale on the table, and they agree to cuddle before sleeping because they're tired, okay, and it was a long day.
"I don't deserve you," Zatanna says after some time, her chin on his chest and her body half on top of him. She can see it on his face, how it strikes him as odd that the thought even crossed her mind, but he does not tell her otherwise. He has always known to let her feel what she wanted to, since her father became Fate, since she yelled at him for getting caught in Prague. He just let her be herself, day in and day out, but hovered not too near and not too far, just close enough to be in reach.
She loves him more than words can say.
Dick brushes her hair out of her face and chuckles lightly. "Me either. And yet here we are." He peers at her, as if he were looking at a rare jewel, and brushes his thumb over her cheek. "I hope you know how happy you make me, Z," he whispers, smiling fondly at her. "I'm so excited for the rest of my life with you."
"Me, too." Her lips curl into a small smile and pushes up a bit to kiss him. "Good night, Dick."
(But when he kisses her goodnight it gets a little heated, and Zatanna doesn't blame anyone when she ends up naked on top of him.)
