Mk. I thought this up while on YouTube one day, when I typed in Akatsuki. I saw this video (explained below XD) and was like 'MAN! I Should make somethin' out of that!'. So I did. WEEE!!! Shot oneshot. XD AND IT HAS DEIDARAAA! SQUEE!
…-cough-…Aaaanywaaay…
When the breaky line thing comes in, a scene starts that I take no credit for. During the scene, there will be itaclic parts. Those are mine. w00t! I got it off a video on YouTube called 'Crack Crew Does It Akasuki Style' Sooo…without further distraction and shit, I preseeent…THE DISCLAIMER!
Disclaimer:……I got nothing.
Wee! Wasn't that fun!?
…-silence-…
….Whatever.
On with the…one-shot thingy! No pairings. Unless you look really, really hard, it might be a little ItaDei-ish. But not really. (It's my first one. Please be nice. But remember, I don't own the idea of the scene, just the idea of the one-shot…does that make sense?)
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Stalking of the Akatsuki
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Huff, huff. Pant. Pant.
….
BAM!
"HEY! Watch where you're going, bastard!"
Once again, our overly-hyperactive blondewas running blindly through the village. Though this time he had run into a certain someone. Take a wild guess.
"Hn."
Naruto huffed, but decided against an argument because he was in a hurry. He quickly side-stepped Sasuke and took a step forward…
..and was caught by the arm.
Naruto huffed once again and turned to meet the curious Sasuke. "What?" he snapped.
"Where are you going in such a hurry, dobe?" Sasuke questioned.
Naruto glared at him slightly before yanking his arm out of the taller boy's grasp and turning away. "To find the Akatsuki."
Sasuke froze. Naruto realized his mistake a split-second too late. Oh shit..
Naruto closed his eyes and waited for a blow….
But it never came.
He opened one eye and turned to see a pair of blazing onyx eyes.
"You're taking me with you."
Naruto blinked. He tried to think up an argument, but got nowhere. So he merely shrugged and turned on his heel to walk down the road with the young Uchiha close behind, deep in thought.
Today is the day I get my revenge, Itachi. Oh yes. I don't care if I have to slap you with pancakes. YOU WILL DDIIIIIEEE!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA-coughcough-HAHAHAHAHA..(etc.,etc.)
Sasuke grinned evily while mentally laughing evily.
Naruto glanced back and saw the eerie smile on Sasuke's face and become utterly creeped-out. He sped up slightly and faced the road, seeing one of the Akatsuki members up ahead: a cloak with red clouds…
But he also noticed the hair…black. And long. Up. In. A. Ponytail.
Ohshitohshitohshitohshitohshitohshit..
Naruto mentally panicked, his little emotions running in frantic circles. Then, he stopped. He had (miraculously) had an idea. He turned towards the left, farther into the trees. Sasuke followed mutely, still grinning like sadistic child molester..thing.
He kept going for a quite a ways, remembering what he had heard Jiraiya say about the whereabouts of the headquarters of Akatsuki. He stopped right outside the trees and scanned the area quickly. He grinned and turned to Sasuke.
"Promise not to go all avenger on me?"
Sasuke snapped out of his maniacal mental rant to see what he was talking about.
A window.
--
"..So, ten bucks it is. I'm not going AAANY lower! I'm gonna have to use most—NO WAIT!..ALL of my ninja skills for this!" Sasori told Itachi, walking through the doorway and into the kitchen. Itachi stared at him for a moment.
"…Yeah…you do that. But I'm not paying you until you show me the goods."
The two boys outside the window, hiding their chakra, blinked. Goods?
Sasori made an impatient huffy noise. "Fine."
Itachi gave him a satisfied look and walked back through the doorway. Sasori stomped and swiped a hand down in a 'Screw You!' fashion once he was out of sight.
The boys blinked again. What the hell was going on?
They watched as Sasori paced the length of the kitchen. Then, he shoved a hand in his pocket (Does Akatsuki have pockets!? O.O) pulled something out.
"DEEEIDAAARAAA! I'VE GOT SOMETHING SHINY FOR YOUUU!!!"
A loud bang was heard. "SHINY!"
Deidara fell threw the doorway and scrambled towards the piece of plastic Sasori was dangling above his head, mumbling things like "Shiny! Where's the shiny? Shiny, shiny, shiny..oooh plastic baggy!.." He reached up for it, still on his knees, but it was raised farther above his head. He fell and hit Sasori.
He stood up and looked at the other man. Or whatever Sasori is. "Oh hi Sasori, didn't see you there!...Yeah..Now let me get this straight..I heard promises of shiny things?"
The boys saw his eyes glint hopefully.
Sasori grinned. "Yeah! I got something I need you to help me with…and I'll pay you in shinys!"
"SHINY!" Deidara lunged for the shiny thing again, but missed.
Sasori's grin turned thoughtful. "Yes…now back to what I was saying…I need you to…ummm…well…there's this new puppet..no that won't work.."
Sasuke and Naruto watched the man mumble to himself as the distracted man, called Deidara, stared at the...whatever it was.
"..Oh! I got one! I need you to make me a bomb to…explode stuff-"
He looked down to see Deidara staring at the shiny thing like it was a magical square that shot out unicorns and bubblegum. (1)
"DEIDARA! Are you even…OH FORGET IT!" Sasori roared. He pulled a long piece of rope out of his pocket, shoved Deidara on the ground, got behind him, and began to wrap the rope around the blonde.
"Hey, this is like that one time at art camp!...Man, that was a fun time!..I was all tied and like…like…WOOOOO!"
Deidara was now fully tied up. He flopped on his side and used his fet to run and spin himself in circle on his side, all the while yelling "WOOOOO!"
Sasori stared at the dizzying mass on the ground that was supposedly Deidara. "What does he EAT in the morning, chocolate-covered sugar cubes?! Meh..anyway…ITACHIIII!!!"
Itachi shuffled through the doorway.
Outside, Sasuke growled. Naruto looked utterly confused at the behavior of Deidara. And mildly creeped out.
"Pay up!" Sasori grinned like a lunatic and held out his hand. Itachi looked over Sasori's shoulder to see Deidara trying to get the piece of plastic Sasori had dropped, that was supposed to be the shiny thing. Itachi looked in his pocket (DO THEY HAVE POCKETS!?!?!?!) and pulled out some money and handed it to Sasori, who skipped happily out of the room.
Itachi watched Deidara for a bit longer before picking him up and slinging the blonde over his shoulder while he was singing 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star'. He walked out of the room.
--
Naruto and Sasuke sat there for a moment in silence. They looked back through the window once again. On the counter, a pink, fuzzy notebook lay open and a pen sat on the left page. On the right page, a small entry was made.
Dear Diary,
Jackpot!
-Itachi
And on that fateful/frightening day, two young shinobi decided to never, ever stalk an Akatsuki again.
--END—
1 – When I was in fifth grade, I sat next to this kid named Justin. We were doing math and we had to figure out the 'magic square' so Justin said "What's so magical about it? It doesn't shoot out pretty ponies and bubble gum!!" XD! Thanks Justin!
Shortness, yes. I sorry. But I tried. That scene with Deidara, Sasori, and Itachi I didn't make up. Nor did I make up that diary entry. Just the extra parts with Sasuke and Naruto.
