"It is just beyond this hill," assured Sesshomaru as he steadily led the way through the trees. "Can you hear it?" He glanced over at Inuyasha who, despite his obvious exhaustion, had kept pace with him throughout the day.

"Yeah," answered Inuyasha quietly. "I can hear it. But what's the point, Sesshomaru? I can still…" Inuyasha trailed off and ducked his head a little when Sesshomaru tried to lock gazes with those unintentionally telling eyes.

"Neither of us have rested in three days. Flowing water is a luxury not to be bypassed." Flowing water truly was a thing to be cherished. It was bound to be less toxic. But more than that, it was the occasional reason to slow down. A reason to force Inuyasha to stop and to breathe. A reason for both of them to escape the thoughts that plagued them with every meaningless step into an unknown direction.

When the calm surface of the river came fully into their sights, Inuyasha made a reluctant noise of acknowledgement. The peaceful break in the forest felt somewhat untainted. The water looked and smelled miraculously clean, lacking the expected overpowering stench of societal waste and neglect. It was as though they had stepped into a portion of their past—into a time where humanity was young and skittish and where vast stretches of land belonged to no one and were freely roamed by demonkind.

"It's…wow. It's kinda like home," breathed Inuyasha while they both stared as though this was some kind of shared delirium. Inuyasha must have been referring to the small human village they had lived in together long before the existence of nuclear warfare. The peaceful camaraderie Sesshomaru had so often observed between Inuyasha and the villagers seemed a mere distant dream now. The air had been free of toxins and the humans had regularly embraced coexistence with former enemies if violence could be avoided. Even Sesshomaru had found peace on the outskirts of their presence. Inuyasha's ability to bring living beings together had always been otherworldly.

Sesshomaru blinked away his visions of the past and returned his attention to the frozen form of Inuyasha standing on the bank just shy of the water's edge. To witness Inuyasha so entranced was a rare and fleeting gift. "Perhaps this area contains traces of spiritual energy," Sesshomaru offered gently.

Inuyasha's childlike, open expression closed and gave way to a dry, humorless chuckle. "You know as well as I do that the spirits don't care for this world anymore. It's been that way for a hundred years. Can't really blame them either."

"Then the bitter earth itself has not entirely forsaken us yet." Sesshomaru grasped Inuyasha's shoulder, coaxing his brother to look at him properly. "Come. How long has it been since the last time we bathed?"

Inuyasha raised a filth-caked brow. "The last time we…" He made a noise of astonishment and shook his head in obvious disbelief. "Sesshomaru, of all the goddamn things." But even as Inuyasha waved his hands at the frivolous notion of sinking any precious time into proper hygiene, an unmistakable smile crept onto the hanyou's face. Inuyasha breathed a long sigh. "It's been damn near forever."

Following the unspoken chore of scenting the area for unwanted company, they both bent to take a long drink before they stripped down to their skin and proceeded to wash their filthy garments in comfortable silence, draping them over a fallen tree once they were at least close to their original colors. When they were finally free to enter the water themselves there was a momentary pause as they faced each other, free to gaze upon the other's unclothed body. It was as though they had not seen each other in months. To truly see someone while vigilance was reserved for whatever disasters lied ahead of them seemed an impossibility now. Sesshomaru would never have been able to prepare himself for a future where he scarcely had the leisure to consciously set all else aside and pause to admire his mate.

Inuyasha was thin. His thick, ashy mane was limp with sweat and grime, but he was strong. And still so full of life after the decades of constant death and despair that weighed so heavily on his half-human heart.

Inuyasha was still the vision he had been over 500 years ago when Sesshomaru had first begun to view him in an intimate light.

Just when it seemed as though neither of them could bring themselves to move and break from this awkward exchange, Inuyasha cleared his throat before tightening his lips and turning to wade into mildly flowing water. Disappointment curled in Sesshomaru's stomach. Perhaps merely boring into Inuyasha with his eyes had not been the most efficient way to initiate a less than strictly conventional bath.

Sesshomaru waded in after him and they lowered themselves in up to their necks in silence, managing to keep an arm's length between them while they began to wash. Wetting his hair, Sesshomaru stared at the space between them with distaste. He found himself wondering how long such a natural space had been developing between them and their actions while they spent their days and nights dodging the battle zones.

Their march of survival had kept them alive. But they were no longer living.

Sesshomaru submerged himself fully in the crisp mountain river, picturing his most recent couplings with Inuyasha. While he recalled the rare nights of pleasure in cramped, small spaces that hid them from sight and from the gentle caress of the moon, he also recalled the unease and rigidity that hung over them while the pleasure distracted them both from watching the outside. When had they simply held each other without cowering like animals or bristling with instinctual protectiveness?

When Sesshomaru emerged and wiped the water from his eyes he caught Inuyasha staring his way. Actually, Inuyasha was a little closer than he had been before, dripping and causing multiple ripples.

Perhaps this detour was making Inuyasha uneasy. Sesshomaru frowned, venturing, "is there something on your mind?"

"No… Not really. I'm done, I guess. With the bath." And with that, Inuyasha began trudging towards the bank, muttering about the nearby sound of frogs.

"Inuyasha, wait. Come here."

"What is it?" Inuyasha turned and made his way back over before Sesshomaru could answer, his eyes shifting and searching. "Something wrong?"

"No." Sesshomaru raised a clawed hand and softened the tone of his voice to avoid further alarming his brother. "For once, all is well."

"Then what, you crazy youkai? You seem weird tonight. Giving me the silent treatment."

Sesshomaru raised a brow. He had thought Inuyasha to be the one giving the silent treatment. Inuyasha must have just sensed that Sesshomaru was in a strange mood and misinterpreted it. "Forgive me. That was not my intention. I was only thinking about you," Sesshomaru admitted.

"Oh yeah?" Inuyasha lowered himself back into the water and inched forward, officially entering Sesshomaru's space. "If you're worried about me or something, I'm fine. I really am. This is actually helping. It was a good idea." Inuyasha grinned, causing Sesshomaru to smile in turn. Inuyasha was trying to reassure him before he even knew the problem.

"Truly, I am grateful for that," began Sesshomaru warmly. "However, my thoughts were entirely selfish. You see, when I suggested we bathe together," Sesshomaru drifted forward until their chests collided and their crouching legs slid together to accommodate the lack of space between their bodies, "I had hoped to do so together." Sesshomaru touched his nose to Inuyasha's cheekbone, softly inhaling the scent of the only mate he would ever have in this lifetime. "I only wanted to feel you against me." He longed to slide his hands across weathered skin and linger there—to feel the life in Inuyasha's body while they were not fighting back-to-back and snarling with crimson-eyed ferocity.

Sesshomaru felt a huff of Inuyasha's breath when the hanyou snorted at his action. "Well…fuck, Sesshomaru," murmured Inuyasha with a strange tone in his voice. "Did a Cupid bite you in the ass while I wasn't looking?" Inuyasha bypassed Sesshomaru's admission with a blatant joke, but his hands were soon grasping at Sesshomaru's waist and chest, finding purchase.

Sesshomaru closed his eyes, his lips brushing along Inuyasha's face and his body radiating with rare, unconcealed emotion. This was not the time to hide his degree of affection. Not when the world was in ruin. Inuyasha needed to know.

Their closeness coaxed a small, content sigh from both of them. After a long moment, Sesshomaru elected to pull back so they could see each other clearly again. But Inuyasha worried his lip, his eyes intense. The hanyou's hands had also fallen back to his sides.

Sesshomaru frowned lightly and took one of those hands, slowly bringing it to touch his shoulder where Inuyasha had marked him as his own with his teeth. "Do you not wish to feel me as well?" he inquired with no small amount of desire in his voice. He was sure Inuyasha did, but something was bothering the hanyou again.

Inuyasha's eyes shone a bit as he stroked Sesshomaru's hand with a thumb, shaking his head. "O'course I do. Christ, I really, really do." There was a barely-there tremor in his voice.

"Then what is the matter?" Concern curled in Sesshomaru's stomach as he tried rubbing soothing circles into his mate's back.

"It's nothing."

"Do not lie to me."

"Seriously. Forget it. Let's just—"

"Inuyasha."

"Damn it, Sesshomaru!" The hanyou's voice broke and his eyelashes glistened. "How can you even do this? How can you still be this way…after everything?"

Sesshomaru stared in utter confusion.

Inuyasha grit his teeth and touched Sesshomaru's cheek lightly with the pads of his fingers. "You won't even… Won't even get upset. Just pay me back, damn you." A tear rolled down the furious hanyou's cheek.

It was then Sesshomaru realized that Inuyasha was not merely touching his face. Inuyasha was touching what was left of it. The disfigured flesh. The permanent scar that claimed the left side of his face, the skin of his neck, shoulder, and arm, and the entire stretch of his back. The aftermath of warfare so toxic, not even youkai could heal properly from it.

"You wish for me to be angry with you?" Sesshomaru asked, feeling a little anger himself towards the notion.

"It was my fault. If I had been paying attention, you wouldn't have used your body to protect me… Sesshomaru, you lost an ear! You can barely see out of that eye! Have you looked at yourself?"

"I have," growled Sesshomaru through clenched teeth. He knew very well what Inuyasha saw. And he knew Inuyasha blamed himself.

Was Inuyasha so guilty that seeking physical comfort from Sesshomaru had become wrong? Or perhaps Sesshomaru's new appearance only filled him with discomfort. Perhaps Sesshomaru was just a constant reminder of what their lives had become and would always be.

Avoiding Inuyasha's eyes now, Sesshomaru took a step backwards, out of Inuyasha's space. Unable to help himself, he gazed at what he could see of the damage. He touched it, pursing his lips. The texture was unnatural. Almost…repulsive.

"…Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru, no." Inuyasha stood up abruptly and moved through the water, straight for Sesshomaru before immediately wrapping him in a full, crushing embrace. Any previous hesitancy was gone. "Don't. That isn't what I meant." The hanyou sighed raggedly and lowered himself back into the water, taking Sesshomaru's face fully into his hands.

This surprised Sesshomaru but he made no move to object.

"You could have died," continued Inuyasha slowly. "You could have left me here by myself. And I almost let that happen. And still, all you do is treat me like…like…"

"The only thing that matters?"

When Inuyasha failed to respond with more than a helpless blink, Sesshomaru pulled the hanyou by the hair and pressed his lips against Inuyasha's, moving them slowly but firmly. That single move seemed to break a dam in Inuyasha's restraint when Inuyasha opened his mouth and pressed beyond those eager lips to find Sesshomaru's tongue. Sesshomaru's hand grasped the back of his mate's neck when Inuyasha kissed him fiercely, unyieldingly—the sort of rough carress that made heat coil in his belly and his breath come heavily. Inuyasha soon abandoned his lips and began to kiss and lick every inch of his face and neck.

Finding his entire body moving with Inuyasha's and the rippling water, Sesshomaru groaned appreciatively at Inuyasha's affectionate ministrations. "You are the only thing," Sesshomaru panted. "You are the reason I have not put an end to myself. And the reason I can still 'be this way.'" And Sesshomaru would always choose death if it meant Inuyasha could live.

"Stop it already," Inuyasha responded breathily. "I get it." He licked a long stroke across Sesshomaru's mating mark, sending a wave of pleasure throughout Sesshomaru's body. "I love you too, idiot."

Sesshomaru grasped Inuyasha's hips, tightening the rhythmic, wet slide of their interlocked bodies. The air filled with mutual, desperate moans as they ground and thrust themselves into each other's abdomen and thighs, fangs clashing as they stole each other's breath again. Their mouths grew sloppy and erratic as their pleasure steadily built.

"Shall I?" breathed Sesshomaru against Inuyasha's lips.

Inuyasha nipped the youkai's bottom lip and slowed their movements a bit, dipping down to flick his tongue over Sesshomaru's nipples. "That mean you're…almost there too?"

Inconceivably aroused by that merciless tongue, Sesshomaru nodded, his golden eyes lidded.

"You just relax." Without warning, Inuyasha reached between their legs and grasped them both, stroking hard and fast and tearing a gasp from Sesshomaru's throat.

Gladly and without a single thought, the youkai allowed himself to be completely taken over by his mate. Sesshomaru wound his arms around Inuyasha's neck and relished in the sensation of heated flesh rubbing swiftly against his own, matching his thrusts. Breathing raggedly, they stiffened against each other with quieted, helpless cries as they both released into Inuyasha's hand beneath the water, riding each other until the moment of their graceless collapse. They sank against each other, their fingers lazily roaming each other's bodies still. Sesshomaru kissed the smooth skin of Inuyasha's chest before Inuyasha nuzzled the scarred flesh of Sesshomaru's neck.

They lingered there for a while, tenderly stroking and whispering, reliving a time that was long past.


Sesshomaru pressed his chest against Inuyasha's back, draping his arm over Inuyasha's waist, as they lied naked in their makeshift bed of leaves. Inuyasha rested his head on Sesshomaru's other arm and placed an appreciative clawed hand over Sesshomaru's.

"Where do we, uh… Where do we go from here, Sesshomaru?" asked Inuyasha while they both tightened their grips on each other and blatantly ignored the angry red glow creeping up into the sky from the horizon. They could both sense the destructive power. It seemed to be coming from all sides this time.

They had known for days that they had managed to place themselves in the crossfire. Their time on earth, their time together, was slipping through their fingers.

It was in these moments that Sesshomaru did fear death. He feared the unknown and the notion of eternity. What if he could not go where Inuyasha would? Perhaps Inuyasha would go where humans went. Or perhaps Sesshomaru had done so much wrong in his life, to the world and to Inuyasha alike, that Sesshomaru would be sent to where no warmth or love would ever reach him again.

"Sesshomaru?"

Sesshomaru kissed the back of Inuyasha's neck and laced their fingers together. Sesshomaru wondered how he had ever been allowed to have something like Inuyasha. And why the gods had decided to take him away so soon. Sesshomaru's chest ached. "For now, we rest," he murmured gently into Inuyasha's hair. "If we are still alive when dawn breaks—we run until the gods see fit to strike us down."


Hello, my loves, it's Icy Doodles. I decided to write this oneshot during the stress of school because I needed those two wonderful idiots. I'm just getting back on the fanfiction horse after a rough time, so please be gentle. J I adore you all and I hope to be back here soon with something longer!

- Doodles