"Well, we did it."

"Yeah. We did." Her soft voice resounded in the dark room. Immense sorrow aged the blonde's voice.

"Just for a moment, can we forget all that's between us? Just stuff it into the closet?"

"Ok." She was wary of the brunette next to her. With the shortage of funds and space, they had to share a room.

"Buffy, I'm sorry. For everything. I. . . . I was jealous of you. Your family, your friends, your life. Mom wasn't around much, and when she was . . . . life wasn't fun. She was a drug addict and an alcoholic. And she was abusive. When I got my powers, I . . . . I fought back. And I killed her. That's when my watcher found me. And she was the mother I had never had, once I was sure I could trust her. I was only fourteen when I became the slayer, fifteen when I met you." Buffy looked at her, her green eyes wide in the dark. She had never known. Faith had never opened up so. "I guess the power went to my head."

"I . . . .I was . . .jealous of you too. The freedom you had. The freedom you enjoyed. I felt so. . . . smothered at times. Like my life wasn't my own."

"Wow, the Mighty Buff comes down from her mountain." That sounded more like Faith, and Buffy found herself becoming defensive.

"Hey! I thought no judging!"

"Sorry. It's just. . . . you were older, more experienced and . . . . I looked up to you. You had everything I had never had."

"And you had the freedom I never had."

"I wanted a loving family."

"I wanted space to just be me. No destiny tying me down."

"I wanted someone who loved me like Angel loved you."

"Yeah, but even then, our relationship was different than it had been. He was my first love, when I was still new enough at slaying to be innocent. Before I lost my virginity. That was horrible."

"The sex?" She was confused.

"No. . . ." She said slowly, unsure of how exactly to explain. "The sex was. . . . .awesome." Faith smiled. "But the result. . . . . . that was horrible. But that's how my life is." She began ticking off points. "Making the squad; someone trying to kill me. Going to the zoo; Xander gets possessed. I fall for some guy; he's a vampire. I save the school dance; I burn down the gym and get booted. But that was in L.A. A long time ago."

"I never knew."

"I could say the same. But if you had asked, shown more interest in listening to me, than annoying me. . . . . At times, I would have traded lives in a heart beat." Faith thought about this in stunned silence. "I wanted us to be friends, Faith. It might have started as a humanitarian ego trip, but once I knew you better, I understood you just needed someone to listen. I guess we all do."

"Well, I'm up for listening. What are you thinking?" "Not to sound self centered, but my life. You were right, in the beginning, it was just me and Merrick, and later on Giles. I was *the one.* Special. Then Kendra showed. Got a little annoying. She was like a Giles clone. Mini Giles. Yet, she had been trained since she was young, and she had never known her family. But she went back to Jamaica, eventually. And it was just me again. But then she came back, to help with Angelus."

"And she died, so I showed up."

"Meanwhile, I sent Angel to hell. But yeah, you showed up, and I tried so hard to like you, but I just couldn't. I had worked so hard to keep my friends, and to keep up in school. I tried to be the best I could be. You might even say perfect, because that's what others expected."

"And then I came, and butted in."

"You were right. I needed you to toe that line, so I didn't have to."

"But I didn't just toe that line, I crossed it. I went way over." She turned on her side so she could see Buffy. "I'm. . . . . I'm sorry about the Angel thing. It's not fair for anyone to steal another's boyfriend, especially a friend. Or a potential friend."

"Life isn't fair. Well, you've listened to me speak my mind, what are you thinking?"

"No, you had a point. Well, you were getting to one. No getting off the hook, B."

She sighed. "I guess the point is, where do I go from here? What am I going to do now? First there was one, and then two. Now, who knows how many there are? For almost eight years, I've lived outside the norm. Now that there are more of us, does that mean I might get a life? Like a normal one?"

"I know where I'm going. Straight back to jail. And I understand redemption. I'm well on the path, but I. . . . "

"You miss slaying."

"I miss everything. Slaying, sex, the way guys get turned on by looking at me. Maximum security sucks, Buffy. Yeah, a roof over your head, three square meals. And I'm top dog. Well, I was. Not sure about now. Which means fights whenever someone needs some extra cash. And the thought that I don't have to stay drives me crazy. Well, I do have to stay, but they couldn't hold me if they tried. I could jump the fence. In the dark, I could elude the guards-"

"But you don't." It was a statement.

"Yeah." She sighed. "I don't. I don't even think about it, not until now. I'll do my time, even if I die in there."

"Don't think that. Maybe Giles could hook something up. Wes broke you out. So it could be considered Council related. Maybe he could get you transferred. Maybe a work/time program. We're not exactly on speaking terms right now, but-"

"You'd do that? For me?"

"We just got to know each other." Buffy smiled in the dark.

"Thanks." They were silent a moment. "Night, Buffy."

"Night, Faith." They settled down and were soon asleep.