Built In My Tool Shed
a/n: if you haven't read the manga yet, this fanfic won't make that much sense because I'm certain that the anime isn't up to the break-up of GoM. Is it? i don't think it gives a clear spoiler though
Disclaimer: KuroBasu isn't mine.
Tall,
Big,
Strong.
I'm those three.
Short,
Small,
Safe.
He's those.
Yet he manages to achieve an even bigger feat than I.
Aka-chin once said to me: I shouldn't say anything to him unless it's important.
Because if it's not, he won't spare an ear.
Sweets with prices fifty percent off—shoe sizes that fit twelve pairs of baby hands—the whine of a child—the sign taped to my back in third grade—the wallowing pits of despair—the end of the crushing; not the beginning, but the end. The destruction of the last single drop of sugar-coated liquid melting on a cane leaf and maybe sugar in general.
That's me.
Shogi. Fifty push-ups, the thin sheet of sweat that coats flesh after a mile run, and also the cup of glass that preserves it. The thick ooze that trickled down our junior year's dissected frog's split chest, the tempting flames of bushfires that lick its way into awakening. The scent of lemon grass whenever the Generation of Miracles sat down to breathe—an obento box—none of the tofu, but definitely the chopsticks—shogi pieces—shogi opponents—the beautiful view of an avalanche from afar.
That's him.
I am in Akita and he is in Kyoto, but,
If there was a happier place, that's where you belong, Aka-chin.
Marshmallow clouds, Vanilla skies,
Milkshake rivers,
Grounds of ice-cream.
Maybe up there where the true glory goes to champions, where sugar pours down your small body like a blessing. A town with best quality chocolate. Where everyone will listen to you again. And where you will no longer taste defeat, as you have twice.
Defeat is bitter and you deserve something sweet.
A lollipop haven is here also, in this place where I want you to go. I want you to lick them and taste every single color that your eyes see. It will be a sweets heaven where you will appreciate. But I can bring tofu if Aka-chin wants it.
I'll build it in my tool-shed, Aka-chin, if you want. The place of your dreams. Do you have one?
I'll design those marshmallow clouds, a soft landing for your parachute, and milkshake rivers for when you are drenched, and grounds of soft ice-cream to catch you when you fall. Since I miss your dual strawberry eyes,
Now one of them is caramel, the lightest caramel there is.
You tasted better with strawberry eyes.
Here's something funny: in primary school, I was taught that people need eyes to see. Yet in Aka-chin's eyes, I'm the one who sees my own reflection. Does the image no longer reach you? Are you maybe blind on one side?
Well, no matter.
This place of yours, everyone will listen to you. This place, I want to see Aka-chin's cute smile.
In this place,
No one
Will call you
Weak.
But I should tell you as well, that this place will not only be yours, but mine. It will be the place of our dreams combined, since in this heaven, you have
Forgiven me
And the way I made your strawberry turn caramel.
Aka-chin, this is what I want to say to you.
But in the end, you won't spare an ear.
thanks for reading!
