Bella can't seem to find seem to find herself after Edward left. Ignores most of New Moon.What happens when Jake helps hold her together but seems to go to far to fast and pushes Bella farther than Edward ever has. When Edward returns can he fix Bella after Jacob has broken her farther than she was to begin with? What did Jacob do that pushed Bella over the edge? Or is it to much for Bella to handle?

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the characters.

Chapter 1-- Drowning at home

I laid here in my bed motionless, thoughtless, in a state of shock

I lay here in my bed motionless, thoughtless, in a state of shock. I still haven't eaten, drank, slept at all since I was brought back here lain in my bed after he left me in the forest ,after he told me he didn't want me anymore ,after he told me he didn't love me anymore. And when he left I felt everything in my body leave with him. I was now empty. Not able to think, to move, to feel, to even let his name drift in my mind without giving into the emptiness even more for he was my everything.

I tuned out all of the of the sounds coming from everywhere other than the inside my head trying to make sense of what had happened ,trying to wake up from the nightmare that had become my life.

Not wanting to give into the nightmare I laid in my bed continually trying to wake up in Edward's arms and for him to tell me it was just a dream and for us to go over to his house and for Alice to dress me up and to play pranks with Emmett and to listen to Edward play the piano again and to feel Esme's cold arms wrapped around me in a hug and to feel the soothing waves of Jasper's calmness fill up my body and to even feel Rosalie's glare bore those two familiar holes in my back again. I loved the Cullens. I loved every part of them; they are what make me whole.

I was now just a cracked and crumbled puzzle never to be put back together again.

It has been a week or so since it happened, I don't count the days any longer because they don't have Edward with me in them. I went down stairs to get something to eat, not that I was hungry for I had no reason to live, but I was sure Charlie would soon be worried.

I finished my bowl of cereal and walked back up the stairs to my room and laid on the bed going back into my emotionless state. Renée opened my door and began packing all of my clothes in my suit case.

"Bella you are coming to live with me in Florida." She said simply as she continued to pack my things.

"NO!" I screamed at her leaving my emotionless state in the dust. I wasn't about to leave Forks. It was my home. I was never one for fits but I let Renée have it, not that she was to blame for all of this. I ran to my suit case and began throwing clothes out of it everywhere. I wouldn't let her take me away from Forks for it was the place where I met him, where I fell in love with him. This was the place that held my memories of him. I knew if I was going to try to hold onto my memories of him I would have to stay here.

"I can't leave!! No! I won't leave!! Forks is my home!!" I yelled at her at the top of my lungs. She didn't deserve this but my senses were in the dust with my emotionless state.

"You can't take me away…. Everything I had is here." I whispered, the last part barely audible. And with that I let go, I let go of everything and broke down into tearful, wet sobs muffled by my pillow which I clung to as if it were Edward.


I knew I had no reason to act like this. I knew I didn't deserve Edward, so why should it matter that he no longer cared for me. It was selfish of me to think he could-no anyone could care for me in that way. Though I couldn't let go of the memories of his voice ringing in my head over and over "I love you Bella." It was like I was drowning in those words and then his words from that night began to drown me and my hopes of his former words farther and farther.

With the passing days of my drowning I would try to live for Charlie. I could tell he didn't like seeing me like this so I tried. I ate. I talked. I slept or tried to at least. Everyday I would plaster on my mask of life and go to school, cook dinner for Charlie and try to make it seem like I had gotten past him but it was hard to make Charlie think I was fine when I woke up screaming every night for my nightmares of Edward leaving again and again. But I tried and though I doubted it I was wondering if I was succeeding.


AN: So I changed the plot so there is a new Chapter 2 tell me what you think please!!