Del·e·te·ri·ous

Causing Harm Or Damage

Yep, that's me. Walk into my life and you'll walk out damaged goods. If you live to. Before my mother got pregnant, she was happily married. Now, an murderer-to-be for a son. My betrothed wants nothing to do with me. We met twice, christmas and some party and yet, she had alreadly decided the moment she layed eyes on me that I was trouble. Crabbe and Goyle follow me round, like gormless apes, because of who our fathers are. Blaise had been my only real friend from Hogwarts that could recite the alphabet past E and he's too distracted by girls. Pansy wants me for my money and everybody else hates me. Pansy's here now. Sat there blabbering on to me. I wonder if she knows I'm not listening. She'd probably carry on even if she did.

No, most people here avoid me if they know what's good for them. Oh, in this pit of self loathing, I think I forgot to introduce myself. Malfoy, Draco Malfoy. I attend Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and I'm in Slytherin, and no; I'm not evil, I'm misjudged. Everybody looks at me and thinks, pureblood, father is a death eater, yeah, that's one bad apple. They're wrong. I hate my father. I hate everything he is and everything he stands for. I hate that everybody presumes I'm just like him. It's at this particular moment in time, when Pansy drops her fork, swinging around to see a fight at the Ravenclaw table, that I realise what a sorry excuse for a Slytherin I am. Slytherins should be cunning and hardfaced, and yet there I was the previous night, crying in Myrtle's bathroom wondering what I was going to do with myself. I was to kill Albus Dumbledore, the greatest wizard alive, although don't let my father hear me say that, I'd be mincemeat. I can't do that, I can't kill him. I don't want to be a murderer, but I have to. Or he'll kill me. I often thought which would be a greater loss to the wizarding world, of course, he would. But if I died resisting the Dark Lord, he'd just find somebody else to kill the old man. There was no sense in us both perishing right? Wrong. I was just being a coward. I should owl that monster and inform him that I refuse to do his dirty work. Everybody crowded to see the fight, whilst I sat, moving my food around with my fork, deep in thought. When I finally looked up, I saw that almost every person in this room was either egging on the fight or, in the teachers' cases, trying to stop it. I noticed the only other person who was sitting, still eating was a girl. She was sitting closely by the two fighting witches but didn't seem hindered by them. I'd heard about her. Loony Lovegood. Talking of her imaginary pests as if they were as ordinary as cats or dogs, she'd walk around barefoot without a care in the world. I envied her really, not caring about anything and having no worries. Of course she has worries, everyone has worries. She probably just bottles them up. Like me. I held my poise through the day and cried it all away at night. It's a damn good thing really that nobody went in Myrtle's bathroom or I'd be the laughing stock of Hogwarts of Myrtle told them. Told them that Draco Malfoy came to the girls toilets to cry at night. I looked arould at all of the people, what would they say? The Slytherins would sneer and disown me. The Gryffindors would laugh. The Ravenclaws would look for a logical reason for my sadness while the Hufflepuffs would try and comfort me. Proffesors would hear and contact my mother. She'd try to get me to talk to some mind-healer who would blame everything on my dysfunctional relationship with my father. They'd say that I strived for acceptance and that I should write a letter to express my feelings. I swear they have prompt cards. How can they honestly think they know you within an hour session? Even as I leave the great hall to get away from the noise, I could picture them blaming my hatrid of loud noises on a fear of my father's disapproval. I automatically head to Myrtle's bathroom. I'm not even sure why, it's just a safe place. I run cold water, splashing it in my face. I needed to be awake for Snape's lesson. If he suspected something was wrong, he'd confront me. My train of thought is disturbed by footsteps. I dive into a cubicle and lock the door.

"I know somebody's in here. There are lots of wrackspurts here. They don't usually go where there are no people. I'm not sure about ghosts actually," She paused, only to continue, presumably now talking to Myrtle. "Have you seen any Wrackspurts around? They usually linger near heads and cause fuzziness." I saw Mrytle fly across the ceiling before floating down.

"I don't know! Nobody comes in here ever! Why would I know? There's only been you now and that boy is in here a lot. Nobody teaches me about made up animals!" She shouted and went gliding back up to her window. I half expected Loony to flip but she didn't.

"Oh, they're not made up. My daddy said that lots of people don't believe in them but we know they are real. Which boy are you talking about?" Myrtle didn't respond but squealed and left the room. This surprised me. I didn't realise she ever left this place. I saw luna sit down between my cubicle and the one next door. "Who are you?" she asked simply, and I don't know why but I felt obliged to answer.

"It's.. uh. I''m uuhm.-"

"You're Draco Malfoy. I recognise your voice."

"You do?" I raised an eyebrow. She had never spoken to me before, how could she recognise my voice?

"Yes, you shouted at me in my first year when I walked into Pansy Parkinson by accident." I bowed my head, she was in fifth year, did I really make that much of an impression by losing my temper?

"It's okay. A lot of people shout at me. I think sometimes they should sell nargles in small amounts as stress relief. They take away emotions, so people could use them to calm themselves."

"That's smart, but what exactly are nargles?"

"Oh, they're thieves. They live in mistletoe and steal people's emotions and thoughts. They are misunderstood really. Daddy thinks they're horrible but that's just what they need. If people needed nargle's thoughts to live, they'd probably steal them too. But it's still best to protect yourself." She laughed and slid a necklace under the door. It had a butterbeer cork attatched to it and she explained that it helped to fend them off. I picked it up and hesitated for a second but pocketed it before clearing my throat.

"Listen Loone- Luna. I think you should leave. People might get the wrong impression if they found us like this. They might think there was something going on."

"You care very much what people think. I can tell. But you should worry more what you think Draco, because that's all that matters really."

"What I think?"

"Yes." She said simply and I almost broke down and told her what I actually thought of myself. I nearly told her how scared I was for everybody I loved. Nothing ever went right for me and I didn't think it would start doing so any time soon. Instead I groaned and stood up. I needed to leave. I'd let my guard down too far. If I stayed here much longer she'd be too involved. I'd be putting her in danger. I don't know why I cared but I did. Probably because I didn't have many friends. I start to let my guard down and I'm scared of losing them. I needed to get out before that happened with anyone. I unlocked the door and opened the door to find her plaiting her hair. I'd never seen it like that and it looked quite pretty to be honest. When she saw me looking she brushed it out with her fingers, smiling up at me. I stepped around her, but she stood and walked in front of me.

"Everybody says you're bad Draco Malfoy. I guess you're just misunderstood. Like nargles." She smiled and waited for my response.

"You're smart Luna. But you should stay away from me now. You don't want to go making friends with the wrong sort."
"I think I can tell who the wrong sort are for myself, thanks," I widened my eyes at this and laughed slightly. I ran my fingers through my hair and sighed.

"No, really Luna. You don't understand. I'm dangerous. You'll only get hurt. We can't be friends." She tilted her head from side to side a few times as if considering this and then bit her lip.

"Everybody can be friends Draco. It just takes effort in some friendships more than others. Obstacles can get in the way but they can just prove how much you care." I smiled and shook my head.

"Everybody who comes near me gets hurt sooner or later Luna, I'd rather I didn't have to add you to the list. I'm deleterious."

"No. Deleterious means causes harm. But you don't cause harm, you just get caught up in it." She beamed up at me and kissed me on the cheek. She then twirled around and skipped away. I sighed again and made my way to Snape's.