AN: Another real silly idea that came to me. Since I am sulking for not being able to watch R&I last night, I have to keep myself entertained. I am seriously considering emigration at the moment.
I don't own anything.
Secrets in the attic
Generally Jane would not consider a morning in an attic as a good way to spend an off day. But, when she arrived at her best friend's house, Maura was bustling up there. Jane settled for coffee and a movie, but soon she got bored and wanted company. She joined the Medical Examiner in the attic, with all the intentions in the world to get a quiet corner and chat.
"What on earth are you doing, Maura?" she asked amused.
"I am looking for Bass's terrarium." Maura replied with a frown.
"Maura, there is no way that the damn turtle can fit into something like that." Jane huffed.
"Tortoise!" Maura reprimanded "I know Bass is too big, Jane. But the boy next door needs one for a project and I said he can use it."
Jane shrugged and than a box to her right claims her attention. It is neatly labelled: "Christmas Cards 1999."
"O Boy! You are so sentimental." She teased Maura.
"I am not!" Maura protested.
"You so are. Why else will you keep all your Christmas Cards? Or a glass cage that you probably have not used in ages. I bet I can find every one of your outfits that you discarded in here." Jane said and examined the room adventurously.
"No, I normally donate my clothes to charity."
Jane deflated a bit, but then another thought occurred. "I bet I can find all your love letters. Hmmm – I guess that Garrett's or Ian's love letters could be an interesting read."
"Jane." Maura sighed. "Neither of them has really written so called love letters. You might find notes or cards of them and you can read them if you insist, Jane Curious Rizzoli."
The indifferent attitude from Maura was like a red flag to Jane. Accepting the challenge she got up from her spot and started hunting through the boxes. She would love to tease Maura with the love letters . . . notes . . . whatever she may find. With all the boxes so carefully labelled it should not be too difficult to find. Maura gave her free reign, after a stern warning that Jane should not mess the place up.
As far as Maura was concerned, Jane already knew everything there is to know about her. If it will keep her occupied to look for private letters, so be it. Maura had nothing to hide, at least not what she could remember at present. Perhaps Jane may even find the terrarium.
Jane found Maura's attic to be a treasure chest. It reminded her of the hours she, her brothers and cousins have spent in her grandmother's attic. Jane made a mental note to keep this in mind for her future children's amusement.
She started looking for the letters, but the attic was full of objects that could entertain the detective. Jane chuckled at Maura's school photos and mountains of certificates the ME stashed in her attic. She found evidence of multiple times that Maura acquainted the UPS man. Jane had to try some of the young Maura's toys – all very educational of course – and even hugged an old teddy bear when she thought Maura was not watching.
Jane's fun was contagious and it did not take long before the hunt became a show and tell. This attic was a treasure chest and Jane had a road map of what Maura was at any particular point in her life. She found a long wooden chest against the wall. It was wide, but quite modest in height and length. Curiously Jane opened it.
Inside was a samurai sword. If Jane knew Maura, and she do, she knows that this sword is authenticated and very valuable. Even so, it was about the last thing that she would expect to found in the attic. Jane picked it up carefully and turn to her best friend.
"Maura?" Jane asked in awe.
Maura glanced in her direction and swiftly moved in Jane's direction.
"Give me that!" She took the sword from Jane. "This is not a toy, detective." Maura scolded moving away from the detective. "You can hurt yourself seriously. Did you know that they used to test katanas by determining how many heads could be severed with one stroke? They would line condemned prisoners up for the test."
Jane was frowning. "Yes, I actually heard it before. Why do you have a sword in your attic, Maura." She asked in her best detective voice.
"I used to do fencing." Maura nonchalantly did a complicated and very fast move with the katana. "See?" she asked Jane innocently.
Jane's eyes were the size of saucers. Go figure! Who else than Maura Isles would have a collectors sword and know how to use it? Then Jane picked up the cleverly disguised sidestep that Maura treated her too.
"Maura!" Jane stomped her foot. "Nice move. But your fencing gear is over there. That is also not your typical fencing sword."
"But Jane, my fencing instructor did teach me how to use it."
Jane threw her hands in the air. "Fine! Keep your Highlander sword and chop heads off in your free time. See if I care." Jane huffed and turned on her heel.
"Jane! Wait?" Maura called behind her. But the detective was insulted and wanted nothing more to get away from the doctor. Maura started to rush behind the detective, but she realized the futility of the attempt when she heard Jane's car. She shrugged and put the katana away. It would be no use to speak to Jane when she is in this mood. Maura could just as well find the terrarium while she thought how to get out of this dilemma with the minimum of teasing.
Maura went to Jane's apartment with a peace offering of extra cheesy pizza and beer. Jane actually did answer the first knock, but when she saw who her visitor was, she slummed on the couch with her laptop. As the door was not shut in Maura's face, the doctor took it as an invitation to try her luck. Sometimes Jane can act just like a sulky six year old. Maura learned long ago to not take Jane seriously when she is in such a mood. That will only encourage the behaviour.
So Maura sat next to Jane and playfully ruffled her hair. That earned her a death glare from the detective.
"Still mad at me?" Maura asked indulgently.
Jane grunted something. Maura noticed that Jane was not as "mad" as she tried to be, but was trying to guild Maura into telling her about the sword. Maura grinned amused.
"Okay, than I will have to drink beer on my own."
That almost shocked Jane out of her mood. Almost, but not quite. Jane hated it when there was something that was not disclosed to her. She respected privacy, but it just get to her if something was declared off limits. It was like a red flag in front of a bull.
Maura opened a bottle and offered it to the detective. After a moment the detective took it. She grinned sheepishly, knowing that Maura was not bluffed by her act. She reached out to the pizza.
"I hate you!" she declared in vain after a while.
"No, you don't." Maura giggled.
"Fine! I hate it when you are trying to hide something from me." Jane pouted.
"Silly girl. It is only a toy." Maura said patiently.
Jane nearly choked on her beer. "Dr. Isles, I sincerely pray that you will not consider a real sword as an appropriate toy for your children one day."
Maura shoved Jane, causing the detective to giggle. "Of course not. But it was a toy for me."
Jane widened her eyes and Maura sighed.
"I got it when I was 10."
"You gotta be kidding me." Jane blurted out. She has to agree that it was an awesome toy, but for an adult. Not a child, not even an exceptionally gifted child.
"No, I am not." Maura laughed. "See, no hives."
"Are your parents nuts?" Jane asked.
"No, but I had more than one care taker that could ensure that I don't hurt myself with it."
"Maura, that is just ridiculous. Why would your parents buy you a sword? When you were so young?" The Isles's weren't outstanding parents, but surely they would not give a 10 year old something that dangerous as a toy.
"I was reading a lot about swords and wanted to know everything about it. They then thought that it will be a great gift." Maura explain, hoping that Jane would be satisfied. No such luck.
"But why? Why were you fascinated with swords? Weren't you too busy dissecting frogs and small animals?" Jane's curiosity got the better of her.
"I got have more than one hobby." Maura defended. "And you actually guessed it already." She said quietly.
Jane was confused. She ran through the conversation they had about the sword. "Highlander?" she wondered aloud. Then with more confidence. "You were fascinated by Highlander? Of all the shows and movies you have missed, you managed to catch Highlander?" Jane smirked disbelievingly.
"It appealed to me, okay." Maura replied defensively.
Jane felt guilty about laughing at Maura. Tommy at one point was not seen without a Spiderman costume. Frankie was adamant that he was a cowboy. Jane herself was fascinated by any cop show. It surprised her that Maura had a normal childhood fantasy. In a way it was still so Maura, thoroughly researched and perfected as well.
"I am sorry. What was the appeal?" Jane asked gently.
Now it was Maura's turn to act like a six year old.
"You just want to make fun of me!" she sulked.
"With your bad ass sword? Never." Jane shaked her head animatedly, eliciting a chuckle from the ME.
"I wanted to tell Mother something one evening and was watching TV while I was waiting for her. I was trying to find a documentary and sort off stumbled on Highlander. I loved it."
"I use to love it as well." Jane offered.
Maura got excited about her tale. Jane admission just encouraged her with her story. "The similarities between me and the immortals were so obvious. I was also adopted and nobody knew who my parents were. I –" Maura was actually blushing. "I thought that I have to be immortal as well."
Jane just smiled and Maura carried on. "I was really excited, there was a group that I belonged to. But I was also so scared that somebody may "kill" me and one of the evil immortals may take my head. So I needed to be prepared – just in case Duncan, Amanda or Methos did not find me first. So I learned how to fight with a sword."
"Did you ever tell your parents?" Jane asked.
"No, immortals do not tell mortals about their immortality. Mother did find out though and she did try to tell me it is only a story. I did not believe her; mortals just did not know the truth."
"So then she bought you a sword?"
"Not quite. Father got me the sword and arrange for lessons. He probably thought that the obsession will not hurt."
Jane was very amused with this story. "How long did you fantasize about being immortal?"
"A few years." Maura shrugged. "Until science shown that the hypothesis is very unlikely. I did enjoy my sword lessons though and kept it up."
"Even in your fancy French boarding school?" Jane asked sarcastically.
"Yes, I was allowed my sword lessons." Maura grinned, thankful that Jane was not teasing her.
Jane got up for the next round of drinks. She squeezed Maura's shoulder as she walked passed her. And wondered . . . What if Maura Doyle was a still born, replaced by an immortal infant secretly? There could only be one and Maura is diligent enough to be the one. For a moment Jane was jealous that she was not adopted.
She sat down again and stared at the ME for a moment.
"You are so fantasizing about being immortal again, aren't you?" she playfully accuse the ME.
"I am not." Maura denies too quickly.
"Hives!" Jane announces after a moment gleefully and playfully poked the ME.
AN 2: Of course a lot of bullshit, although I hope that you have enjoyed it.
