Confessions of a Rebel Elf

Stats-

Name- Elana Fay daughter of Reylen and F'noir

Age- 56. Am such a youngling. (AN/ Remembers elves get old! In human years she would be about 17)

Martial status- Sadly I am single. Note 2 self: MUST CHANGE THIS!
Family- Dad, Mom, and a brother… Oh and my pet squirrel, Bimpy. (the bro named him)

Looks- I have red hair which is like most elves silky but unlike most elves it is V. short due to the fact that my little brother who is only 30 decided it would be a fine joke to chop it off in my beauty rest. And ever since then his stuft animal has 'magically' disappeared.
I have hazel eyes but it turns out that hazel is just a fancy name for mud brown, charming.
I am rather on the short side for an elf. I am only '5"6 and a half inch.
I am slender for the most part my mother, Reylen warns me that if I do not cut back on food soon I shall swell up like a blimp. I said that since my brother already resembles a blimp it is hardly surprising that I would have the same issues. I also told her that it was her own selfishness that got me here in passing her genes along to me. She just sent me to my room. She is very touchy on the issue of weight.

That is more than anyone could ever want to know about me so I shall stop bragging about my charming looks and get onto more important stuff like… My hunk for the year.
Need I even say his name? Could any other elf compare to his good looks and cunning? The answer is of course no. But I shall say his name anyway just incase you turn out to be one of those odd people that are in love with a dwarf or something like that. Legolas. Only the most studly, handsome, smart, best with the bow, and not to mention with the best butt, elf in the whole Middle Earth. Oh, if only he were mine own. My precious. (AN/ Hardy har har I just had to add that)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
June 21st, Midsummer's Eve-

1:00pm,
God, another Holiday come and gone and are I get are supposed, "thoughtful" gifts from family members and friends. Nothing from Legolas the hottest elf in the world. I shall list the received below:

A) A necklace made of acorns stringed onto… A piece of what I hope is string but looks suspiciously like one of my old braids, from the little man (my bro).

B) A trine from Jonny (my friend, no not that kind of friend I mean, please! He's a great guy but he holds noting next to Legolas) but here's the thin, I don't garden! The last time I planted anything was in school with my class planting tomatoes and they died. No one else's did… Only mine.

C) Shampoo for Bimpy (the squirrel) from my dad. Just a subtle hint that he needs a bath dreadfully.

D) This book thingy from mom.

E) A pin from Lorana (my other friend). I have to say that this was probably the gift that costs the most. Even my family doesn't love me enough to buy me expensive things.

F) A kiss from Legolas.

HA!!! You so fell for that last one, didn't you? I wish is all I have to say on that front.

1:10pm,
Drank 2 many Voktails. Am rather tipsy.

1:11pm,
I only took a sipsy, but now I am V. tipsy.

1:15pm,
I can rhyme. Who 'da thunk it?

1:20pm,
It's a Holiday. There should be something fun to do. There should be but there is not. What a sad sorry place this is.

1:22pm,
With a name like RivenDale you would think there would be at least like some tubing parties and lots of hot guys. Only one hot guy here, my love Legolas.

1:23pm,
Mmmmm… Legolas…

4:25pm,
I think my squirrel Bimpy may be a mind reader. I told him to leave me alone and he did. Although, I did throw a pillow at him… Hmmm… I still think he has special mind powers.

4:30pm,
Nothing to do.

5:36pm,
Still nothing to do.
5:56pm,
Lorana came over and we gossiped for a while but she told me that she has a crush on Jonny and I got kinda weirded out. I mean, this guy is like my brother. We went skinny-dipping together before. That sounded bad. I would never go skinny-dipping with my pervy little brother.

6:34pm,
I wonder if Legolas is a perv. I would be honored to be sexually harassed by him.

6:50pm,
I wish Leggy would sexually harass me.

10:23pm,
Am procrastinating. I need to wash Bimpy but that would require walking down to the river and I have no energy to do that.

11:58,
Went down to the river when Da threatened to fry Bimpy up and serve him to Grandma if I did not wash him. So here I am walking down to the river with a stinky squirrel and no boyfriend.

12:06,
Am depressed. And wet.

12:10,
Dumb Bimpy. Pushed me in the river.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
AN/ Thoughts? I hope I get reviews! I will love you forever if you review. And I will give you a nice banana. Mmmm… Banana's are good. I must be off now! Like Elana I need my beauty rest. Heheheh. Review me? PLEASE!!!