Rating: T

Warnings: mild cussing, implied KisaIta, KakuHida, and ZetTobi

Summary: Itachi's missing an outfit. When he finds it, he wishes he hadn't. Why? (Better than it sounds.)


"Kisame." I called from across our room. He looked up from the scroll he was reading.

"Yes Itachi." Kisame said. I shuffled through our closet some more.

"Do you know where my goth outfit is?" I asked throwing the other clothes across the room.

"You mean the one yo wore last night." he said seductively. I could hear the smirk in his voice. I blushed a little as I turned around.

"Yes that one." I said under my breath, quickly walking across the room to hide my blush. I guess I didn't walk fast enough because I heard Kisame chuckle.

"No I haven't seen it since it was on you." Kisame said still smirking. I rolled my eyes as I turned towards him. The shark had a shocked look on his face.

"What?" I asked eying him carefully.

"Uchiha Itachi. Such ungentlemanly. What would your father say?" Kisame said gasping. I knew he was teasing though.

"If I was as much of a gentlemen as my father wanted me to be, I wouldn't be letting you fuck me every other day now would I." I said smirking.

"Touche. You also wouldn't be wearing such degrading things like the said outfit you're looking for." Kisame said. I glared at him, but both of us knew it was half halfheartedly.

"Shut up. I'll go ask Deidara. He's usually taking my clothes." I said walking out the door and closing it behind me.

Of course it would be bad timing with the luck I had. At the exact moment I looked up from closing the door Tobi ran in front of me wearing my goth outfit I was looking for. Or should I say half of it. His lower body was...er...exposed I should say.

"CATCH ME ZETSU-SEMPAI!" Tobi screamed. Hidan came out to see what the commotion was about, saw Tobi's ass, screamed, and slammed his door.

Permanently scarred for life, I turned around and went back inside my room. Kisame looked at me with one eyebrow raised curiously.

"Did you find-" he started, but I interrupted.

"Yes and I wish I hadn't. If you get it back before I do, remind me to burn it," I said walking towards the bathroom, "If you'll excuse me, I'll be trying to erase my memory." I slammed the bathroom door.


Epilogue (I couldn't resist writing this)

"Kisame!" Kakuzu called from the hall way.

"In the living room." Kisame called back. Kakuzu appeared and put his hands on the back of the couch.

"Do you have any fucking idea why in the hell Hidan screamed? He keeps mumbling, "It won't go away." over and over." he asked. Kisame raised an eyebrow at him. That's not like Hidan.

Meanwhile, Itachi stood in the mirror trying to kill himself in dream-scape which was not working. Hidan was curled up in a ball on the bed he shared with Kakuzu rocking back and forth. Anyway, Kisame sat there looking at Kakuzu and wondering why Hidan was acting like that.

"No, but I think it has to do with Itachi wanting to erase his memory and burn one of his outfits." the blue skinned one answered. Kakuzu was about to answer when Zetsu appeared out of the ground.

"Kakuzu. Kisame. Do you have any idea where in the hell Tobi is?" Zetsu asked the two. The shark and miser shared a glance.

"No. Why?" said miser asked.

"Well... Tobi decided to surprise us by wearing one of Itachi's outfits halfway and ran down the hallway when we tried to take it off him." the cannibal explained.

"Great. Now I wish I hadn't asked why Hidan screamed. He must have saw Tobi. Speaking of Hidan." Kakuzu walked back down the hallway.

"And now I why Itachi wants to burned that outfit." Kisame groaned leaning his head back.

"Ukes. What can you do?" Zetsu said shrugging and disappeared into the ground.