The Knights Who Don't Do Anything
~a parody by cat (with help from roger who always likes a good knight-bashing)~
a/n: Yes, you guessed it, it's the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, redone Tortallan-style. Okay, so it's a parody of an already silly song. So sue me. (Which brings me to the…)
disclaimer: I do not own either Tammy's characters or VeggieTales. There, I said it. Happy?
~
(Jon, Raoul, and Alanna sitting in large overstuffed recliners, drinking lemonade, etc.)
Jon: Well I've never saved a damsel and I've never killed a dragon
And I've never beaten back a siege outside the castle wall
And I've never fought a duel and I don't look good in armor
And I've never been to Port Caynn in the fall!
All: 'Cause we're the knights who don't do anything!
We just sit here and lie around-
And if you ask us to do anything, we'll just tell you…
We don't do anything!
Raoul: Well I've never fought in Tusaine or in Scanra or in Carthak
And I've never battled giants over twenty-five feet tall
And I've never courted ladies and I'm not too great at jousting
And I've never been to Port Caynn in the fall!
All: 'Cause we're the knights who don't do anything!
We just sit here and lie around-
And if you ask us to do anything, we'll just tell you…
We don't do anything!
Alanna: Well I've never eaten fire and I really don't like swimming
And I've never rode a barrel down a raging waterfall
And I've never picked a pocket and I've never talked to squirrels
And I've never been to Port Caynn in the fall!
Jon: You're doing it wrong!
Raoul: Yeah, you're supposed to sing about knight-y stuff!
Alanna: *ignoring them*
And I've never met the Great Gods and I've never done a shape-shift
And I can't breathe underwater and I don't like cows at all
And I never wear kimonos and I can't recite a poem
Jon and Raoul: *give up and join Alanna for the last line*
All: And we've never been to Port Caynn in the fall!
