A/N: This continues right before Max arrives to her dorm room. This is all in Kate's first person point of view and her sudden realization. This is super quick and only a oneshot.
TW: Homophobia: f slur
If there are any comments, I will reply back!
Enjoy.
Maybe I was too confident.
I must have simply blanked out on my family whenever they spoke about homosexuality and the LGBT community. I could have just turned a blind eye, because I disagreed with them with all I've got. But, now with Max finally in my life, I couldn't ignore it.
I told her I had a headache before she left. It has been fifteen minutes since she left. My throat felt tight and my head did feel dizzy, truthfully. Not because I became sick from weather or allergies, but just… confused.
The door creaks open, softly and obviously trying to be as discreet as possible. It was Max; she was as graceful as a deer on ice.
"Kate?" She whispered. I loved her voice. She sounded so sweet, yet so cutely awkward.
"Yes?" I replied to let her know I'm awake.
"Good morning," Max then closed the door behind her, "How are you?"
She moves my bangs and plants the most gentle kiss on my forehead.
"I'm fine." I respond. I faintly smiled at her.
"Are you going to stay in here for the whole day?" She sat down at her desk, looking away from me to look at her laptop.
"It's a possibility. I might walk outside for a bit, if I'm up for it. Can I let you know if I do that? I would need your number for that."
"Oh, yeah! Of course," Max quickly got out of her seat and took her phone out, "I should have asked for it when you kissed me."
"Wouldn't want to ruin the moment," I weakly chuckled.
"Are you okay? Did you actually sleep last night?"
"I got enough sleep."
"Kate, you need more rest with a headache."
"I know, but I don't feel tired."
We exchanged our numbers, placing each other's names with hearts next to them.
"But, get some more rest, okay?" She kisses me again. If she's any sweeter, I think my teeth will fall out.
"I'll text you later." She says before opening the door. I waved my hand "goodbye" and she left as she waved back.
I still felt dizzy. I spent a few minutes in her room, looking through my phone and even trying to get more sleep, but I felt worse. I decided to get on Max's laptop, left on sleep, but I only watched half a movie. There was nothing that helped.
I decided that I needed to get out. I fixed her bed so it didn't look so disheveled.
I had to grab some more clothes; there was something telling me to just wear Max's clothes. I looked through her closet next to her door; a gray jacket caught my eye first.
Max only ever wore that jacket, except apparently today, wearing a blue flannel instead.
I couldn't help but grab it and wear it myself. It was so warm and smelled like tree bark. I wore my skirt and shoes that I left in her room, but her black shirt and gray jacket were mine now. I had put my hair up and I left, locking it.
I went into my room again, still dark and how I left it, but all I wanted was my toiletries.
I left the dorms after, thankfully without running into anyone, but as I crossed the grass, I saw Dana. She saw me already and I knew I couldn't escape.
"Kate!" She called out.
"Good morning, Dana." I greeted as she came up to me.
"Hey, Max told me you were sick. What are you doing out here?" Dana placed her hand on her hip. There was a deep concern in her eyes. I could barely look.
"I needed some air. I couldn't sleep," I gripped Max's jacket, "I already text her about leaving for a moment."
Dana raised her eyebrow at me, but then gives a gentle smile, "I know about you guys, too. So, don't you worry."
"That's great to hear." I felt better. Then again, Dana was with Juliet, so it was expected.
"Well, I need to go," I continued, walking around her, "I have to go get some food."
"No problem, see you around!"
My heart was about to jump out of my chest. I took my phone out, ready to text Max about where I was going.
Me: I'm going out to get some fresh air.
I can finally talk to her on the go. It was something I dreamed about, back when I didn't know who she was. I was able to talk to her everywhere and feel my lips become into a smile that I try to hide, yet I will become so distracted.
I felt the vibration in my jacket. Multiple one.
Max❤: Alright, be careful out there. I'm with Chloe and Rachel.
Max❤: Let me know if you need anything. Love you.
Max❤: I MEAN LIKE YOU. (^^")
I had to hold back my laughter. It was probably a habit.
I will. Like you too. xoxoxo
I was pleased with that and continued on my way. There were a few students outside still, but some slept on the grass and a group of boys doing their tricks on skateboards. To be frank, I did not know what I wanted to do while I'm out. I wish to speak to someone, but who do I go to?
I found myself at the bus stop, not sure I got there, waiting to get to my unknown destination. I wanted to text her more. I felt my fingers tapping and wiggling around, wanting to grab it again to keep the conversation going.
I grasp it; I tried to think of anything to text her. You'd think spending so much time texting, you never stop running out of things to say. But, there was nothing coming to mind.
Me: Is there something you want to do later?
A small date would be nice, maybe get my mind off things. Then again, me being outside is supposed to get my mind off things.
Max❤: Do you have something in mind? :)
I felt giddy at the thought. More movies, more food, more... kissing. I cannot word it that way.
Me: I was thinking some movies. I want more quality time with you.
The bus arrives. I paid my bus fare and just headed somewhere, who knows where.
Max❤: I would love to.
I sat against the window, watching the school pass me by.
Me: Food is on me tonight.
I watched the ocean and the pier go by. It was a strange feeling to feel so whole in an empty bus.
Suddenly, Max was calling me. I considered letting it go to voicemail.
"Hello?" I decided to answer.
"Hi Kate, are you just going to walk around?"
"... Yeah," I eyed the worn seats and gray metal roof, "I tried to sleep. It did more harm than good."
"Aw. When I'm done with class today, we'll watch some movies and eat plenty of food to make you feel better. It's way early, so I'm with Chloe and Rachel at the Two Whales."
"That's good-"
In the background on Max's side, "Hey Kate, Max loves you!"
"Chloe, please!" Max sounded embarrassed.
I felt my cheeks burn.
"I'm sorry, Kate."
"It's fine."
It was silent. Even this, I was comfortable. Holding the phone against my cheek, knowing she was on the other side, it felt nice.
"Is there something you want to say?" Max asked.
I let out the breath I've been holding. Now wasn't a good time to. I desperately wanted to.
"Maybe later, okay?" I said, finally.
She was silent on the other side. I gulped; my throat was dry.
"I'm always here to listen. Let me know when you're ready. I'll talk to you later, okay?"
"Okay. See you then."
Halfway through the travel, that's when I truly started to think.
My mother was very vocal about her distaste for gay people and my dad had only agreed. My sisters looked at them with curious eyes, especially my youngest sister, but I couldn't tell their opinions. I gripped the end of my skirt. The last thing I ever thought about was getting disowned by my family. Now, it was a huge possibility. I couldn't begin to say what my thoughts were. I was so afraid. But, I felt brave, somehow. I had her by my side, but I always held my family close and dear to me.
I stare out, watching the trees and clouds pass by, as I went back and forth on these emotions.
I get another text on my phone.
I expected it to be Max. She was so worried about me.
To my surprise, it wasn't.
It was Warren. I only even text him when we have assignments together and vice versa.
Warren: Hey Kate, did you see what was on the bulletin?
Which one? School? Online?
Me: What's on it?
My pulse was abnormally fast; it's never been like this.
What I got back was a picture.
My breath was caught in my throat. It took up half the bulletin board, a poster with me and Max on it from our date at the cafe. He sent more pictures, of us outside holding hands and inside together.
Warren: There are more around the school and on the school website. I saw Chloe and Rachel taking them down. I don't know where Max is.
Me: Can you take the online ones down?
I knew I had to leave. The bus stops. Two more passages get on.
Warren: I'll try my best!
I tapped my finger on the screen.
Me: Are you okay with us being together?
I don't know what possessed me to ask such a question.
I waited for Max to text. His text scared me; she seemed to disappear after our call.
I decided to call her first.
It rang and it rang and it rang. Nothing.
I check Warren's text.
Warren: Of course! I just wish I didn't find out like this.
Me: Thanks Warren. You're the best.
I smiled slightly at that, but it was unsettling. Someone took their time out to follow us around and take pictures of us all day. I can't think of anyone who would do that.
Me: Can you also figure out who did this?
I had to ask Warren. But I can guess that Rachel and Chloe either are finding or did find the culprit.
Warren: You can count on me!
The bus stops again. I decide to get off here.
I ended up in a very small town, where it was only a gas station and one diner from the looks of it. There was a cracked and dull gray street, The town was probably a few miles out.
I feel my phone vibrate.
I check the caller ID. I took a few deep breaths. I see "Mom" on the screen and it could only mean one thing.
My hand shook as I choose to answer it. I swipe it quickly.
"Hello?" I held my phone an inch away from my ear.
"Katie?"
"Lynn?" I was surprised to hear her voice on the other side. "Why are you calling from mom's phone?"
Lynn is my little sister. I felt warm again hearing her.
"I wanted to call you earlier! But, I dunno if there was something wrong or not."
Maybe she noticed how uncomfortable I was after all?
"Oh, I'm sorry, Lynn. I hope I didn't scare you too much."
"You're the one that looked scared. When we were leaving, you couldn't look at us."
"I... I was scared. I still am. I don't like the things mom says."
"Me too. I listened, but I don't really get it."
"Are you with her? Or dad?"
"No, mom is cooking right now and dad and sis went out."
"So you just took mom's phone?"
"... Maybe."
I laughed. I waited for her to say anything. I can hear nothing, except for a little breathing. She must be moving around so she can't be heard.
"Do you like girls, Katie?"
I let out a sigh. It was a relief that the tone of her voice was calm. But, she was a sweet soul, I trusted her.
"Don't tell mom, okay?"
"Your secret is safe with me. Mom is calling, I have to go, love you!"
"Love you too!"
That's one person in my life that is okay with it.
Warren: I got the pictures from the school website down.
Warren: I met with Chloe about the pictures. She was pretty pissed.
Warren: She said most of them are down. We haven't found the person yet.
Warren: Or Max.
I was getting worried about her.
I called her again.
It continues to ring and ring, yet still no answer.
Me: Do you have Chloe or Rachel's numbers?
It was a try, at least.
Warren: I'll ask for you.
I decided to stay at the bus stop. I was too anxious to eat at the moment.
I get another call. It was from an unknown number, but I decided to answer it.
"Hello?"
"Hey Kate, it's Rachel. Where are you?"
Despite all the times Rachel told me to call her, I never had her number.
"I went out. I took a bus and ended up in another town."
"Holy crap, Kate. Did you leave because you saw the posters?"
"I left way before I knew they were there. Are they all down?"
"We're still looking," she sounded out of breath, "But, I think we have ninety percent of them. I found Max, too. She confronted Victoria."
Victoria was very popular among the student body and she made it crystal clear that she was wealthy. She's beautiful, but her personality was aggressive and didn't like anyone. Especially me.
"Is she okay?"
"She was scratched up on her face a little, but she's fine."
I had to get home now.
"I have to go, Rachel. I need to get back."
"See you later, bye."
I hang up only to be called by someone else. It was mom again. I was cautious, because it could be her instead of Lynn this time.
I swiped it quickly again, but I stayed silent. I held it an inch away again.
"Kate Beverly Marsh, you need to come home now." Her voice could cut through air.
"Mom, I can expla-"
"Come. Home. Now." Her emphasized "now" sounded like it went through her teeth.
"Mom-"
"Kate, come home!" She demanded once more. "Now!"
I murmured out an "okay." I hang up. I watch the bus drive up to my stop.
"Are you okay?" I asked. I finally had Max on the phone.
"I had a bloody nose and some scratches on my face, but I'm fine." She adds a giggle at the end of her sentence.
"I'll take care of you later. You're not mad that I left somewhere?"
"Nope, I wish I did, too. Are you going to be okay?"
"... I'm not sure right now. I'll be going back to school after, so..."
"I'm going to be here, okay?"
"I'm here at my stop. I... I'll see you tonight."
"Okay. Bye."
I get off the bus, it was cloudy outside and it looked ready to rain.
I put my hood on and zipped it all the way up; it was like Max was here. My house was a lot further than I realized as I watched every passing store, church, and tree.
My house was a simple, white picket fence, green grass, and the beige single story, which was wide and had a slightly high roof for snow.
I gulped, everything in my body felt heavy. It was like I was dragging my weight behind me; I was only getting heavier. My steps scratched against the floor, almost at snail pace, telling myself to just turn around. Then again, my mom would come to me instead, more furious than now. As I get closer to the door and my fist reaches out to knock, I couldn't control my nerves.
I knock, three times and a hesitant forth one, and it opened a minute later.
I was greeted by her glare. It pierced through me; I was barely able to look back.
"Welcome home, Kate." She said first. Behind her, I can see Lynn and my aunt at the dining table. My aunt looked as angry as mom, but Lynn seemed scared. Probably for me.
"Come in, we have to talk. We saw the pictures."
I listened to her, walking in, taking off my hood, and going to the table. I always felt so comfortable in my home, but it was dark except the table, and the tense atmosphere was too much. As I walked over, my aunt stands up and the first thing she slaps me across my face with a hard whack!
"What are you doing, Kate?!" She was more furious than mom. "What are you doing at this school?!"
Lynn watched with horrified eyes. She grabs my wrist for comfort, but the stinging on my cheek was stronger.
"We raised you better than this!" Now mom screamed at me, "What are you doing to us?! Do you not love us?!"
I couldn't reply. All of my words were stuck in my throat.
"This is obscene, Kate! Leviticus 18:22, you remember the verse?"
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.
"You're staying here for the night, Kate. This school is changing you." She grabbed my other wrist, forcing Lynn to let go. I was dragged to the guest room, thrown to the ground, and then the door slammed.
I crawled to the door, pressing my ear to it, and listened to them. I can hear their voices.
"I can't believe she's a fag! A faggot!" My mom's voice.
I then hear running stomps.
"Katie!" Rapid knocking on my door.
"Don't go in there, Lynn!" My mom's voice.
I lock the door and grabbed my phone.
I called her right away. I sniffled, I held my hand to my cheek, I went to the furthest wall.
"Hello?" Her voice sent shivers through me.
"M-Max?" I mumbled through a strained voice.
"What's wrong?" Max had panic in her voice. She sounded like she was moving around and opening things.
"I can't leave. She won't let me leave."
It was quiet. She was waiting for me to say something.
I continued, I couldn't hold my tongue, "I got hit by my aunt. Right in the face. I don't know what to do."
"Where is your house? I'm getting Chloe and Rachel. We're getting you right now."
"What? Max, you can't-"
"I'm getting you." I can hear her banging on a door.
It sounded distant now.
"Max? Did something happen?" Rachel.
"We have to get Kate. She's being abused right now, we have to go!" Max.
"Holy shit..." Chloe.
"Hello?" Max was breathing loudly, as if she was running.
"I'll text you my address."
"Okay, we'll be there soon! Don't worry!"
She hung up right away. I brought my knees to my chest and waited.
No one else has text me. Everyone I know must have seen the posters and the pictures, so where are my other friends? Why aren't they worried and wondering where I am?
Max kept talking to me and asking for answers. She was the only one. Lynn stopped knocking and mom and aunt stopped talking. It was about ten minutes of utter silence. Suddenly, a door was slam shut.
I check the door again, but it was quiet out there. Unlocking the door, I check outside. It was still dark and almost eerie and somehow felt better.
I took slow and gentle steps, floorboards creaking under my feet, as I searched around for my family. In a fit of rage, they all must of left. Maybe Lynn was dragged along, though.
I sighed longingly. Despite being alone, it was better. I stayed in the living room, reading the Bible left on the couch, where light shined through the now open blinds.
It was unbearable to read, like it was wrong to. I was committing sin against God, who I devoted my life to. As I read the verses, my vision became blurry from the sorrowful tears welling up.
But Max means so much to me.
I shut the book again.
About five minutes later, there was knocking. Not just normal knocking, but urgent multiple-hand knocks and aggressive pressing the doorbell over and over again.
It made me anxious. I rushed to the door to open it and, as I hoped, it was the three that came to my rescue.
Max jumps onto me, embracing me tightly, and her face snug in the curve of my neck.
"Are you okay?" Max pulls away. She places her hands on my cheeks, frantically looking to see anything wrong.
"Your cheek is red, there's a bruise forming a bit." She runs her thumb over it.
"I swear to you, Kate, I will hurt anyone who did that!" Chloe interjects.
"Che, tell her that when we get back to school." Rachel grabs her Chloe's wrist.
So they did.
I rested against Max, my head on her shoulder and hand on her lap, as Chloe drove quickly. It was sunset and, despite my phone vibrating endlessly, I continue to keep my eye closed and let her presence warm me.
At the dorms, Max helped me back to her room. Chloe and Rachel said something about donuts, so they stayed outside. We were still walking through the hall, arm-in-arm.
"I'm still going to take care of you." I reminded. I weakly smiled.
"Let me take care of you first," Max placed a kiss on my bruised cheek, "Mine is nothing."
I sighed. Could she be any sweeter?
"How about at the same time?"
"That's fair."
In her room, it was dark, but it was lit by the Christmas lights around her pictures. We both sit on her bed, face-to-face and our legs criss-crossed.
"Did you like wearing my clothes?" She asked me.
"It was comforting." I reply, wrapping my arms around myself. I didn't want to take it off.
There was the same romantic tension in the room again. I felt rebellious in this light, like before during the photo-taking. There was something about the darkness and being alone with her made me feel like I could do anything.
Max came close to me. I can see every freckle and every scratch on her face.
"Does it hurt?" She reaches over and gently places her hand on my cheek again.
"It's fine," I place mine over hers, "Was Victoria the one who put the pictures?"
"That's why my face is scratched up. I don't know what her deal is." She puts her hand down, but I didn't let go.
"I wish I knew." Was all I could say. We looked at each other for what felt like forever. I was waiting for her to do or say something, she was probably waiting for me to do or say something. I couldn't bring myself to say, word for word, what happened.
But, my hand with my ring on was in her hand. My thoughts raced around and I wanted to condemn myself for having these thoughts. But I knew I was only having these thoughts because of what had happened. I can't use her like that.
I pull her in again. I wanted her close. I needed her. I needed her here, in my arms, and as if no one else in the world existed.
Yet, there was something taking over me. It was still those thoughts; my subconscious need to forget about it. I've never thought about it so much.
Max was the one who started it. She presses her lips against mine, running a chill down my spine when her hands touched my sides. I grabbed her face to pull her closer. It didn't feel wrong, but it should. She started to touch me more and she left my lips and kissed down my neck. She unzipped my jacket and slid it off, touching my now-bare arms and reached under my shirt. My body felt so warm and I was out of breath.
Max then stops abruptly. She sat back again, eyes wide, as if she made a mistake.
"I'm so sorry," she took her hands off me, "I didn't know what I was doing. Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," I smiled at her, playing with my ring. I put my jacket on again.
"We should just talk." She suggests. I can still see my phone still ringing on her desk.
"I would love that."
Throughout the night, we went on and on in a long conversation about ourselves. We learned about it through our online messages, but actually hearing them from her and her adventures while in Seattle and London made it so much more. My stories weren't as interesting as hers, but she looked at me and listened to me like they were. I didn't want to sleep anymore. I didn't even want to close my eyes, because I felt there is going to be a time she wasn't there and I didn't want that. Not right now.
Mom is calling, my phone said. I can't answer. Not right now.
The next day, my phone had stopped ringing. In fact, it died. But, it was time to face the world again. After those posters, how can I face anyone? Max was hugging me, still deep in sleep, as she held herself close against my back.
I had a strange feeling in my stomach. As if, something is going to happen, something huge.
A/N: OH BOY A PART 2 IS GOING TO HAPPEN.
Review and shit.
