5:43 PM 7/4/2002
E-mail: lac31685@aol.com
By: Chuquita
Quote of the Week: -from "Get Fuzzy"
Rob: Dude...what the cow are you doing?
Bucky: You didn't like being hugged?
Rob: What are you after, Bucky?
Bucky: For example, if you were to place a MONETARY value on that hug, how much would you be willing to pay for--
Rob: Ohhhhhh my.
Chuey's Corner:
Chuquita: Hello and welcome to the first story on our new "upcoming stories" list.
Goku: Well, actually since all the "upcoming stories" are all on the same list this would really be number ni--
Chuquita: (glares at him)
Goku: --ne. Right.
Chuquita: And we also have another brand new "reviewer request" Corner.
Vegeta: (smirks) Which isn't all that new because the review buttons have been frozen for what will probably be the first
half of July due to a hardware "problem".
Chuquita: (smacks herself on the forehead) Must you interupt EVERYTHING I say?
Vegeta: (thinks about it) (happily) Yes.
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) Anyways, today's request was by Lil' Chi Chi who suggested we have Pookee, Veggie's teddy bear, and
Plushie, Son's stuffed "Veggiedoll" as our guests. For any who remember or any who haven't read the fics, Pookee has had
various cameos in my later fics and Plushie starred in two of his own which were, (ironically titled) "Plushie" and
"Little Buddy".
Vegeta: (grins) [plops a small stuffed bear on the desk] Heh-heh. (turns to Son & smiles) Wave to Kakay, Pookee! [waves the
teddy bear's arm]
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) Pookee DOES talk, right?
Vegeta: Hmm? OH! Yeah, sure. (whispers to her) He's a just a little shy, being among the commoners and all.
Chuquita: (flatly) Who you callin a commoner?
Goku: (defensively) Yeah, we're not commonommonommoners. [folds his arms]
[Veggie and Chu stare at him blankly]
Vegeta: (blinks) Uh, what?
Chuquita: Say Son-San, where's Plushie?
Goku: Uhh, I dunno. Hold on. [grabs a nearby rope causing a massave pile of stuffed toys to fall down upon them, nearly
drowning the desk] (pokes his head above the pile) (squeals) WHEE!!!
Vegeta: (gawks) KA--KAKARROTTO WHAT _ARE_ ALL THESE!!?
Goku: My toys.
Vegeta: ...
Goku: ...
Vegeta: Oh-kay, NOBODY should own THAT MANY stuffed animals!
Goku: [reaches into the pile] But they're not JUST animals. For instance... [pulls something out of the pile]
Chuquita: A stuffed pinapple??
Goku: Huh? [looks at the toy] No wait! That's not it. [reaches back into the pile]
Chuquita: Well if you'd tell us what you're looking for maybe we could help you find--
Goku: (victoriously) HERE IT IS! [holds up Plushie] Say hello to my little Plu-chan!
Vegeta: (glares at the doll) Hello IMPOSTER!
Plushie: (yelps) [dives back into the pool of stuffed toys]
Goku: VEH-GEE! WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR! (pouts) Now I have to find him all over again!
Vegeta: (w/big fake sparkily eyes) You know, you don't HAVE to find him. You can just leave him down there. I'm sure he'll
be oh-kay by himself.
Goku: (shakes his head) No, sorry Veggie, but I don't like to leave Plu-chan alone in a strange place for too long.
Vegeta: (snorts) HHMPH!
Pookee: ...
Vegeta: (yells) WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M OBSESSIVE!!! I'M NOT OBSESSED IN THE LEAST!
Pookee: ...
Chuquita: I didn't know that.
Pookee: ...
Chuquita: Really? That's very interesting. (to Veggie) Wow, your teddy here sure knows a lot of, uh, unique things about you.
Vegeta: (to Pookee) I TOLD YOU BEFORE-HAND NOT TO SAY ANYTHING TO HER!!!
Pookee: ...
Vegeta: (weakens) Well...alright, you are forgiven Pookee.
Pookee: (smiles)
Chuquita: (cocks an eyebrow at Veggie) Animal sacrifices, eh?
Vegeta: It's none of your business.
Chuquita: ...right. (to audiance) Anyways, today's fic is intitled "I Do???"
Vegeta: --dee.
Goku: (giggles) Heh-heh, Veggie said (squeaks out) doodee!
Chuquita: (snickers) Doodee...(blinks) Wait, now where was I again?
Goku: The story.
Chuquita: Oh yeah. You know how Veggie always defends his custody over Son-kun by the fact that he's his prince and Chi-Chi
defends her custody over him by the fact that she's Son's wife. Well, we're about to find out what happens when Chi loses
the power that she uses as her best defense against the "ouji" and how she can still lay claim to Son-San here.
Vegeta: (boasts) And saying you saw him first doesn't count.
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) Here's the summary.
Summary: Goku and Chi-Chi find out by TV that the man who performed their wedding ceremony is a fraud and has been just sent
to jail, making their marriage illegal. Now the couple have to find a way to get re-married before the others find out,
namely Vegeta. What happens when Chi-Chi can no longer defend her claim to Son-kun llegally? Will Veggie convince Son to
not get married at all? And what about Gohan and Goten? Are they now illegit??? A G/CC fic.
Vegeta: You know the fact that you said it's a G/CC story automatically says at the same time that I lose.
Chuquita: Aww Veggie, you always lose.
Goku: (grins) It's the law of the land.
Chuquita: Besides, I like using you to test Son-San and Chi-Chi's relationship like that. You're like a, uh, firecracker.
Vegeta: (grimly) You mean I am like some sort of rocket that desperately tries with all its might to reach up into the sky
only to explode in on itself in a firey display of lights?
Chuquita: ...well...yeah. (weak smile)
Vegeta: WELL THAT'S JUST SICK!
Pookee: ...
Vegeta: AND _NO_ I AM _NOT_ BEING OVERLY SENSITIVE!!!
Goku: (holds up his toy) I found Plushie!
Vegeta: (grumbles) Yeah, good for you.
*****************************************************************************************************************************
" READY? "
" READY! "
" Alright then, GO! "
" Ha! I'm winning I'm winning I'm--URP! OH! " Chi-Chi sat back in her chair, cake smothered all over her face and
hands. Goku meanwhile, who was sitting at the opposite side of the table, was still busily digging into the giant vanilla
iced chocolate cake.
He paused and giggled at her, " Heeheehee! "
" Yeah, Very funny Mr. Bottomless Pit. " Chi-Chi chuckled at him, " I'm either getting too old for this or that fat
saiyajin stomach of yours has gotten bigger--if that's possible. "
" Hi Mommy hi Daddy hi--CAKE! " Goten squealed at the huge 7 layer pastry on the kitchen table, " WOW! That has GOT
to be the biggest cake I've ever seen!--HEY! Why didn't you tell ME about this! "
" Oh, sorry sweetie, " Chi-Chi wiped the icing off her face, " You see when Go-chan and I got married he instantly
fell in love with the cake I made for the occation, so, every year to celebrate our anniversary we-- "
" --HAVE A BIG CAKE-EATING CONTEST! " Goku grinned widely, finishing her sentence.
" Since it's been so long since we've been able to celebrate without some threat of some EVIL PRESENSE-- " she
suspicously took a quick look around the room for a certain ouji, " --attempting to blow up the Earth that you probably
didn't know about this little habit. "
" I think I remember Gohan catching us stuffing our faces about 4 or 5 times... " Goku trailed off, deep in thought.
He let out a large belch, then smiled, " He even joined us in the cake-eating fesitvites twice. "
" Can I have some cake Daddy? " Goten smiled, intranced by the chocolate cake
" K! " Goku replied, cuting off a large piece and handed it to him.
" WHEE! CAKE! " Goten cheered, then ran off.
" Well, Goku, despite everything that's happened, including that whole Buu incident last month, I'd have to say
things have turned out pretty good. " Chi-Chi smiled, turning the TV on, " Of course we probably would have been able to have
spent many more anniversaries together had it not have been for that OUJI. " Goku sweatdropped as he heard her fist pound
down upon the table.
" Come on Chi-chan. It's not Veggie's fault. And besides, if he had not escaped from Freezer's clutches and sent
Raditzu to Earth to try and get me to join up with them I never would have been able to meet Veggie and turn him into the
wonderful little buddy he is today. " Goku said happily.
" HA! " Chi-Chi laughed mockingly, " I'm just glad he doesn't know when our anniversary is anyway. Can you imagine
what he'd do? "
" Yeah, he'd come over here and bring us a nice lil present. Maybe one of those fancy plate sets or a bottle of
champagne." Goku said.
" Ho ho ho! I can certainly see him bringing that last one. Course knowing Vegeta he'd probably say something like,
"Why don't you come back home with me Kakay and we can drink this yummy stuff back at my house which is really Bulma's in my
room for EVIL obvious reasons while Onna sits here and twiddles her thumbs". GOD how I wish he would just disappear into
oblivion!! " Chi-Chi exclaimed.
" AND NOW BACK TO THE DAILY NEWS!!! " the TV blasted, knocking both Sons onto the floor.
" Is it just me or are the commercials always louder than the shows themselves? " Goku said dizzily.
" Really? I never would have noticed. " Chi-Chi remarked sarcastically and just as dizzy as her husband.
" Our top story on the news today; long-time fraud Jack Sandelton has been caught. " the newscaster said.
" Sandel-ton, Sandelton. Gosh that name sounds familiar. " Goku rubbed his chin, " Doesn't that name sound familiar
to you, Chi-chan? "
" ... " Chi-Chi's eyes widened in shock.
" Chi-chan? "
" ... "
" CHI-CHAN!! "
" AHHHHHHHH!!! " Chi-Chi screamed, then fell over.
Goku peered down over the table, " Uh, Chi-chan are you alright? " he asked, worried.
" Uhhhhhhhhhhhh.... "
" Jack Sandelton has been wanted by the East City police for the past 26 years for crimes ranging from kidnapping to
armed robbery, but is probably most known for fraud. Sandelton is under arrest for impersonating an officer, a fireman, and
several other important figures. He is know in jail without bail, the hearing with begin on Monday. " the newsman flipped
through his papers, " In other news A boy saves a hen from a flood and new uses for the toothbrush, not to mention a new
brand of toilet paper that allows you to read the news and take a dump at the same time!...you know that could be bad news
for us--*click*! "
" HEY! " Goku whined as the TV suddenly went black, then noticed Chi-Chi, who was still laying on her back on the
floor, holding the remote, " Chi-chan what'd you do that for! I was watchin! "
" ...Go-chan? " she said weakly.
" Yes Chi-Chi? " he blinked, staring down at her.
" Go-chan...come closer... " Chi-Chi motioned him to the floor with her finger.
" Umm, oh-kay. " Goku bent down on his knees, " Are you, alright? "
" Go-chan. " Chi-Chi grabbed him by the collar and yanked him down towards her, " We have a problem... "
" We do? "
" OF COURSE WE DO!!! " she screamed, sitting up, " Don't you remember who that Sandelton guy is!!! "
" Sure I remember Chi-Chi! He's a con-man who was just on the news 5 minutes ago! " Goku said cheerfully.
" ... " Chi-Chi stared at him, " OHHHHH! " she groaned, slapping herself on the forehead, " Why me...Goku? Do you
remember the priest at our wedding? "
" The bald guy Piccolo pied in the face? "
" ...yes, Goku, the "bald guy Piccolo pied in the face". Do you remember his name? " Chi-Chi said, tired.
" Blueberry! " Goku grinned.
" No Goku, that was the flavor of the pie. "
" ...oh. "
" Now what was the MAN'S NAME? "
" Hassenfeffer? "
" What? NO! SANDELTON! HE'S THE SAME MAN AS THE ONE ON TV!!! " Chi-Chi screamed at him.
" Wow, really? I don't remember him having that much hair... " Goku trailed off.
" Not the newscaster, Goku, the man they were TALKING ABOUT!!! THE ONE WHO COMMITTED VARIOUS FRAUDS AROUND THE
COUNTRY!!!! "
" *gasp*! And to THINK I trusted him! " Goku said, slightly offended.
" Oh someone help me. " Chi-Chi shook her head, " Goku, the man on TV is the same man who Piccolo pied in the face
and a FRAUD. "
" You're kidding...what's a fraud? "
" UGGH!!! A FRAUD IS SOMEBODY WHO PRETENDS TO BE SOMEONE ELSE BUT REALLY ISN'T! WHICH MEANS ANY ACT HE PERFORMS ISN'T
LEGAL WHICH MEANS IT DOESN'T COUNT WHICH MEANS---oh my God... " Chi-Chi turned a pale white, almost hearing the ouji laughing
at her in the back of her mind, " Go-chan, hold me. " she said weakly, hugging him.
" Silly Chi-chan! " Goku grinned, hugging back.
" If I told you we weren't really married after all this time when we thought we were would you still love me? " she
asked, trying to stop herself from panicking.
" That's a funny question, of course I would Chi-chan. " Goku chuckled, then paused, " Hey, if we're not legal does
that make Gohan and Goten-- "
" --SHUSH! " she slapped her hand overtop his mouth, " We have to do something about this! "
" Yes, yes we do. " Goku let go of her and walked back over to the table.
" Where are YOU going!!! "
" I'm doing something about this--cake, look at it! It's gonna get all moldy if I'm not here to finish eating it! "
he complained.
" Goku we're going to have to get re-married. For REAL this time. " Chi-Chi said, deep in thought.
" But last time WAS real. At least, I think it was. I distinctly remember a cake similar to this one although you had
hit me pretty hard during that budatucki battle before the wedding and I was still a little dizzy at the time so-- " Goku
rambled on.
" --of COURSE it was real! " Chi-Chi exclaimed.
" Hmm. We should tell somebody about this. " the large saiyajin nodded.
" WHAT! ARE YOU CRAZY!? THIS IS TERRIBLE!! Besides! Who would we possibly trust enough to tell! "
Goku thought for a moment, " Bulma. "
" No way! "
" Why not? She's trustworthy. " Goku pouted.
" I know that, the problem is, as you have so quickly forgotten, that the OUJI happens to reside in the same
household. " Chi-Chi narrowed her eyes, " And if he finds out that out of some bizzare twist of fate that you and I are no
longer nor ever have been married in the first place there would be no way for me to legally keep you safe from his
clutches! "
" Does this mean I am Veggie's Go-chan now? " Goku cocked his head.
" NO AND YOU NEVER WILL BE!!!! " Chi-Chi yelled.
Goku wiped the sweat off his forehead, relieved, " Good. I can't imagine having to massage Veggie's smelly
Veggie-back the same way I massage yours. "
" I bet he can. " Chi-Chi said flatly.
" Huh? "
" Nevermind. "
" I still can't believe I let you talk me into this. " Chi-Chi groaned as they stood on the front porch of Capsule
Corp. Their car parked on the side-street.
" Name one person you think would be a better choice for us to confide in. " Goku dared her.
" ... "
" ... "
" Alright, let's get this over with. " Chi-Chi rang the doorbell, " Maybe Bulma knows some quick legal way to get
this done and over with before anyone else finds out. "
" Oop! Someone's coming! " Goku pointed to the door.
Chi-Chi gulped, " Now remember, look natural. We can't let on something's wrong right of the bat! "
" Right. "
Mirai opened the door, " Oh, hi Son-San, hi Chi-Chi. " he said casually, then blinked. Chi-Chi had a smile frozen on
her face and Goku was now wearing a sombaro on his head, " Uhh, you guys feeling oh-kay? "
Chi-Chi looked up at Goku's sombaro, then swatted it off his head. The large saiyajin sniffled at the loss of his hat
, then quickly followed Chi-Chi inside.
" Yes Mirai, we're both just fine. " Chi-Chi said through her false smile, " Where's Bulma? We need to have a word
with her. "
" What did Toussan do THIS time? " Mirai said dryly and mildly interested.
" Little Veggie didn't do anything. " Goku answered, " Actually, he's not supposed to know in the first place. "
" Know what? "
Goku turned around and almost did a double-take to see Vegeta had appeared out of nowhere and was now standing behind
him.
" As if on cue, right? " Chi-Chi groaned.
" LITTLE VEGGIE IS HERE! " Goku squealed, grabbing the ouji and giving him a hug, " Oh little Veggie where WERE you?
And how did you get behind me so fast? "
" Oh, I have my ways... " the ouji trailed off, then grinned in contentment in the hug, purposely ticking Chi-Chi off
as usual, " You know Onna, you look a little more NERVOUS then usual. Something wrong? " he snickered at her.
" NOTHING is wrong, OUJI. " Chi-Chi said, still smiling, " In fact everything is just fine. "
" But Chi-chan you just told me a minute ago that-- "
" SHH! " she hissed, quickly shushing the confused saiyajin, " We need to go downstairs to the lab to talk with
Bulma. Is she down there? " Chi-Chi said, addressing Mirai and completely ignoring the ouji.
" Yeah, Kaasan's been there all morning. I can't imagine what she's doing. Something "top-secret". " Mirai explained,
" I think it has something to do with paint cans though. The door exploded several hours ago and...well.. " he pointed to
the door-shaped mark on the hallway wall made in bright green paint.
" Heh-heh...great, just great. " Chi-Chi laughed nervously, then grabbed Goku by the wrist and pulled him out of his
hug with Vegeta, " Come on Goku! We're going downstairs. "
" But what about Veggie? " he asked, saddened.
" "Veggie" can stay right here for all I care! Besides, I already told you this doesn't consern him. " she snorted as
they headed down the stairs, the small prince staring down at them from the top of the stairs,
inquizzitively. He waited for them to get out of view, then tip-toed down the stairs after them, snickering menacingly.
" YOU'RE WHAT?! " Bulma gawked, wearing her lab-coat and a pair of goggles. She was splattered in the same green
paint that covered the upstairs wall.
" Not legally married... " Goku said, pressing his two pointer fingers together and looking down at them in
fascination.
" OH BULMA IT WAS HORRIBLE!! " Chi-Chi wailed, " IT _IS_ HORRIBLE! The newscaster said the guy was a con-man who
performed acts of FRAUD illegally! Oh my poor little Go-chan! " she grabbed onto one of Goku's wrists and hugged it tightly,
" What are we going to do! We're not legally a couple anymore and we never were without even KNOWING IT! "
" Chi-Chi I'm losing the feeling in my right hand. " Goku said.
" You're going to be alright, Chi-Chi. " Bulma laughed lightly, " Vegeta and I aren't married and we still love each
other very much. "
" You---wha-wha-WHAT!! " Chi-Chi shrieked.
" Huh? "
" Wait! Go back! "
" That he and I still love each other even though-- "
" NO! Before that! " Chi-Chi demanded.
" That we're not married? " Bulma blinked, confused.
" WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU AND THAT OUJI AREN'T MARRIED!! " she screamed in shock.
" Well, we're married by "saiyajin" standards. " Bulma nodded, " And believe me you don't even want to know HALF of
the little royal tribalistic tasks you have to perform to be considered "opuapa". "
" "Opuapa"?? " Chi-Chi scratched her head.
" Yeah, that's saiyajinese for being married; well; you know, loosely translated anyway. " Bulma shrugged, " There
wasn't any wedding, you two don't remember one. "
" That's right but I remember mine and Chi-chan's but that didn't count, right? " Goku looked down at Chi-Chi, who
thrust his blood-bloated hand away. Goku shook his hand in the air with relief as the bloodflow returned to his arm.
" Honestly! I suppose you can do whatever you want if you're rich. " Chi-Chi shook her head, " But Goku and I can't
go ON like that! I wouldn't feel right. If I no longer have my status I can't keep him safe from the ouji! I mean, now that
we aren't married, Vegeta technically has SOLE OWNERSHIP over my baby! " she said, worried.
" Baby? What baby? " Goku looked around the room.
" That's YOU, knucklehead. " Chi-Chi grumbled.
" Me? " Goku stared at her, then grinned, " Aww, I'm the baby! " he giggled.
" Well if it means that much to you two I can call someone up and have them come over and perform a quick ceremony
for you guys. That way Chi-Chi won't have to worry about Vegeta taking a legal advantage over Son-kun and no one will have
to know the first one was made by a fraud. Oh-kay? " Bulma smiled, coming up with a safe and quick solution to the problem.
" YAY! " Goku cheered, " Isn't that great, Chi-chan! " he said, then noticed her slumping, " I said, "Isn't that--" "
" Oh Goku I can't do it real fast like THIS! " Chi-Chi sniffled, " I want it to be just as special as the first one
was!! "
" Chi-chan I didn't know what a wife WAS the first time. " Goku pointed out.
" ... " Chi-Chi glared up at him. He smiled cheesily, " OH YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!! " she shouted, then started to sob.
" Aww, Chi-chan don't cry. " Goku patted her on the back, " Why we could make pretend that we're just renewing our
vows and that way we can have a big party and make it all up to look like the real thing but everyone else would think it's
the fake thing but we know it will be real unlike the first one which they all thought was the real thing but was really the
fake thing that even we didn't know was fake! " he grinned a classic Son smile.
" ... "
" ... "
" Goku that has to have been the most brilliant idea ever contrived in your little brain. " Chi-Chi said in awe,
" LET'S DO IT! " she said happily.
" HOORAY FOR ME FOR I AM A GEEN-EE-US!! " Goku whooped.
" It's "genius", dear. "
" ...RIGHT! A GENIUS I AM AND HAPPEN TO BE!! "
" I am SO happy we cleared that up. " Chi-Chi said as she cheerfully climbed up the stairs, " This is going to so
wonderful! Thank you for your help, Bulma. " she shook her hand.
" But I didn't really...do...anything. " Bulma said, bewildered.
" We'll call you once we finish picking out things! Right Go-chan? " Chi-Chi smiled at the large saiyajin.
" Wow, two really big cakes in one sitting. " Goku was off musing of the cake they had eaten earlier this morning,
" And all the pastries and deserts and fish and those tiny little hot-dogs you eat off a stick....AND I know what I'm doing
this time...THIS IS GONNA BE THE BEST THING EVER!!! " he squealed, accidently slamming shut the lab door on Bulma's face.
She blinked, " Oww. "
Chi-Chi rubbed her hands together, " And the very best part is the ouji doesn't even know about it!! "
Vegeta suddenly walked by them whistling 'Here Comes the Bride'.
Chi-Chi felt a little cloud of doom hanging over her head, " Oh no. " she slapped herself on the forehead, " Why did
I say that! Why did I say that! "
" Hi again little Veggie! " Goku waved to Vegeta, who stopped whistling and walking for a moment.
" Why hello Kakarrotto-chan who at this time is set to obey only my own personal bidding. " Vegeta smirked, then
noticed Chi-Chi a little nervous out of the corner of his eye, " Say, Onna, how's it feel to know that you've lost by
default? " he turned to her.
" OOH! I HAVEN'T LOST ANYTHING YOU EVIL LITTLE OUJI!!! " she screamed in his face.
" Yeah, except your mind. " Vegeta chuckled. Goku let out a little giggle.
Chi-Chi froze, " DON'T YOU LAUGH WITH HIM!! HE'S EVIL!! "
Goku stopped giggling.
" It's fine, Kakay, you can continue to laugh with me. This onna has no right to order you around. I, on the other
hand, have retained my half of that right and can now fully rule over you, " he looked up at Goku, " How's that sound? "
" ...huh? " Goku scratched his head, confused.
" It means you can laugh as much as you like, Kakarrotto. " Vegeta smiled.
" ...heeheeheeheeheeheeheheeHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHA--- "
" --ENOUGH!! " Vegeta yelled, causing Goku to pause from his giggling, which had turned into loud fits of laughter,
" Now when _I_ say you should stop laughing you DO stop laughing, get it? "
" Like simon says? " Goku asked.
" Yes little Kakay, like "simon says". Only this will be more like "Veggie says". If "Veggie" tells you to do
something, you do it. If someone who is NOT "Veggie"; like ONNA for example; tells you to do something, you-- "
" --DON'T do it! " Goku finished his sentence, smiling.
" Why you little... " Chi-Chi growled at Vegeta, shaking her fists.
" Let's try an example, alright, Kaka-chan? " Vegeta said to the larger saiyajin.
" OH-KAY LITTLE VEGGIE! " Goku saluted him.
" Now, Kakarrotto, SIT! "
He did so.
" STAND! SIT DOWN AGAIN! UP! DOWN! UP! DOWN! UPDOWN!! " he ordered.
Goku panted heavily, somehow sitting down and up at the same time.
" Nice. " Vegeta smirked, " VERY nice. I could get to like this. " he let out a small giggle, " Kakarrotto? "
" *pant*, yes, *pant*, Veggie? " Goku said while trying to catch his breath.
" I want you to give me a hug. " the ouji held his arms open.
" Oh-*pant*-kay. " Goku walked over to Vegeta, then nearly fell down hugging him, " *whew*! Veggie I'm tired. "
" You should be. " an evil smile crept across the prince's face, " Now how about a little smooch on the cheek for
your little buddy? " Vegeta pointed to himself.
" HERE'S YOUR SMOOCH!! " Chi-Chi sent a flying kick at Vegeta's behind, catapulting him through the ceiling...well..
..catapulting his head through the ceiling anyway, " HOW'S YOUR CHEEKS NOW!!! PRETTY SORE, EH? "
" I..think he meant the cheeks on his face, Chi-chan. " Goku sweatdropped.
" Feh, you can't tell the difference between them anyway. " Chi-Chi snickered, " They both look the same to me. "
" Ouch. " Goku cringed mildly, then made his way to the stairs.
" WHERE ARE YOU GOING! " Chi-Chi exclaimed.
" Umm, to help my prince unwedge his head from the ceiling, err, floor. " Goku said, halfway up the stairs.
" HE IS _NOT_ YOUR PRINCE!!! " Chi-Chi screamed, waving her arms back and forth. Goku giggled at her.
" Sure he is, Chi-chan. Veggie is the saiyajin no ouji and I'm the saiyajin so he's my ouji. " Goku explained, then
almost fell over in fright as a huge bright red glow emitted from upstairs. Chi-Chi could see creases of the ouji's glowing
face through the cracks his head made in the ceiling.
" That's it. We're leaving. " Chi-Chi said flatly, " Follow me Goku, I'll drive us back home. "
" I can't. "
" !? " she froze, " WHAT?! WHY NOT!!! "
" Well, it isn't technically OUR home, is it? " he said uneasily.
A few muffled giggles could be heard from the ceiling above them.
" WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S NOT _OUR_ HOME!!! " Chi-Chi screamed, both angry and frightened at the same time.
" Buh-buh-but Chi-Chi, you're the one who moved in with me. So it really IS my house. " Goku nodded.
" BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HE'S GOT YOU THERE ONNA! " Vegeta laughed. A vein bulged on Chi-Chi's forehead as she grabbed
Vegeta by his dangling legs and pulled him down though the ceiling, causing the ouji to fall to the ground.
" Go-chan, you, you can't really MEAN this? Can you? " Chi-Chi grabbed him by the hands.
" Yuh-huh. " Goku said.
" ERR, I HELPED YOU WITH THAT HOUSE! A LOT OF STUFF IN IT IS MINE!!! "
" It won't be again until we get married for real this time. " Goku said stubbornly.
" HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND!!! " she gawked, " WHERE AM _I_ SUPPOSED TO LIVE!! "
" You could live HERE until it's time, Onna. " Vegeta snickered evilly.
" Oh no no no no! There is no way I'm living under the same roof as the EVIL LITTLE MONKEY PRINCE who's trying to
steal my Go-chan from me! " Chi-Chi scoffed at the idea.
" But I'm NOT your Go-chan. Not yet anyway. " Goku shook his head.
" But he's still my Kakay! Right 'big buddy'? " Vegeta grinned, patting Goku on the shoulder, " Say, Kakay? I've got
an idea. Why don't you let Onna use your house and YOU can stay here with Bul-chan and I until the ceremony? "
" Really Veggie? That's very nice of you. " Goku smiled, impressed.
" Yes, it is. " Vegeta snickered, " In fact, I'll let you stay in my room with me. How does that sound? "
" SLEEPOVERS WITH VEGGIE?! " the larger saiyajin's eyes widened, " OH BOY! I CAN JUST IMAGINE!!! " he squealed.
" So can I. " Chi-Chi grumbled, " And that's why you're going to be going home and I'm going to be staying in one of
the guest rooms here. "
" Huh? " Goku blinked, " But Chi-Chi you just said that you'd never live under the same roof as-- "
" Goku I believe it would be much wiser if you were the one to head home for the night. " Chi-Chi said sternly, " At
home I have Gohan, Goten, and my own father to watch over you--to be my eyes for me for a while. But to leave you in this
ouji-complex-of-EVIL would be nearly sentencing you to a fate worse than death! I will sleep here and you will sleep at home.
I want you to get plenty of rest because tommorow we will be informing the others of our, *a-hem*, vow renewing. "
He nodded and walked towards the front door.
" Funny, " Vegeta remarked, " I'd think you'd be a little scared of living in the same house as me? " he smirked.
" Nope. " Chi-Chi smiled, " But YOU should be. "
" ??? "
" Man, who'd have thought nightime at the ouji-hut could be so--boring. " Chi-Chi muttered as she layed on her back
in the guest bed, staring up at the ceiling, " It's a good thing my Go-chan brought me back a pair of pajamas... " she said,
then trailed off, " Oh Go-chan...I hope everything turns out alright. It's been a whole 15 minutes since I've last called. "
she glanced over at the luminous clock on the counter, " Heh, I sound like that ouji. " Chi-Chi chuckled in irony, " But,
I'm not like that ouji, right? " she said, worried, " Fate and destiny. They seem similar, when both focused on a similar
cause, but are not. I believe it was fate that brought us together Goku. By a strange sort of luck that caused our paths to
cross several times, almost like something or someone had meant for us both to possess a dragonball...and for both our
guardians to have been fellow students of Muten Roshi. That ouji, however, believes it is your destiny to be in his service.
That you were born to be together and that's why you both survived your planet being blown up and both became super saiyajins
and have that weird mental connection with one another. Soulmates, HA! That's a good one. What can you tell about a baby's
future before it has even learned to crawl or speak? NOTHING!....I so need to talk to somebody. " she reached for the phone,
only to pause when she heard a wailing coming from down the hall.
" YAI YAI YAI YAI!!!! "
" Eh? " Chi-Chi cocked an eyebrow, creeping out of her room and down the hallway to the source of the noise.
" YAI YAI YAI YAI!!!! "
She looked up to see the sign on the door, " Vegeta's room...why am I _NOT_ surprised. " Chi-Chi groaned, then
sweatdropped when multi-color lights suddenly burst from around the seems of the door. She blinked, bewildered, " Well, no
sense in turning back now, curiosty's peaked. " Chi-Chi shrugged, then slowly opened the door wide enough to peek in. Her jaw
dropped to the floor.
Vegeta paused from what he was doing and stared back at her, maracas in each of his hands. The ouji had a small line
of brown fingerpaint under each eye similar to a baseball player's. He had various blue, yellow, red, and green fingerpainted
insignias on his bare back and stomach written in saiyajinese. He was wearing a light brown leathery loin cloth and a fuzzy
ankle bracelet on his right ankle.
" ...WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING!!! " was the first thing to come out of Chi-Chi's mouth.
" Uhh, saiyajin ritual. " Vegeta responded.
" Are disco-bulbs part of this saiyajin ritual too? " Chi-Chi skeptically pointed up to the disco-light hanging from
the ceiling.
" No that's just for effect. " Vegeta said, then shrugged.
" I haven't seen you do this before. "
" Obviously you've never spent Saturday night at my house. " the ouji answered, then smirked, " The dance and chant
are said to impose the will of the enchanter upon other full-blooded saiyajins. " he then pointed to the thing attached to a
piece of string hanging around his neck, " Especially ones who are connected by mysterious means. "
She stopped and did a double-take, " That's a potara! " Chi-Chi gawked at the earring tied in the 'necklace', " I
thought you destoryed yours!!! "
" I did. I had Dende fix it for me though. I have Kakay's too, but that's hidden somewhere you'll never think to look
for it. " he boasted proudly.
" It's hanging from the side of your loin-cloth jungle-boy. "
" ... "
" ... "
" --GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!! " Vegeta screamed.
" I'M NOT _IN_ YOUR ROOM! " Chi-Chi screamed back at him from the doorway.
" YOU'RE ASKING FOR IT! "
" MAYBE I AM! WHY DON'T YOU COME GET ME! "
" MAYBE I WILL! "
" FINE! "
" FINE! " Vegeta shouted, then ran headlong towards the door which Chi-Chi promptly slammed shut, then heard a loud
thump a second after. She smirked, " Owww... " a small voice came from behind the door.
" Heh-heh-heh. " Chi-Chi chuckled as she walked back down the hallway towards the guest room, " Makes me almost wish
I had a brother. *snort*, the moron. " she entered her room and closed the door behind her.
Vegeta groaned from behind his bedroom door, " YOUR DEEDS WILL NOT GO UNPUNISHED ONNA!!! "
" Goodnight Ouji. " she called from her room.
" I SHALL REEK THE WRATH OF MY ROYAL ANCESTORS UPON YOU! "
" YOUR STENCH REEKS STRONG ENOUGH ON YOUR OWN, OUJI! "
" ...what? "
" Goodnight Ouji! "
" WHAT? "
" GOODNIGHT _OUJI_! "
*****************************************************************************************************************************
8:31 PM 7/7/2002
END OF PART ONE
Goku: Heehee, Chi-chan and Veggie DO act like they're brother and sister sometimes, don't they?
Vegeta: Bite your tongue.
Goku: [does so]
Chuquita: Well I thought it was a pretty good first chapter. [glances to her left; Pookee waddles past her across the table
dressed up like a fighting pilot] What the heck?
Vegeta: (smiles) Pookee's off to his daredevil lessons.
Chuquita: (ask 'um) "Daredevil lessons"???
Vegeta: Yeah, you know, they give you a plane and everything and you spin around like you're going to crash but instead make
all these fancy Earth-letters.
Chuquita: A sky-writing class?
Vegeta: HAI! That's it!
Chuquita: You sent your teddy bear for sky-writing classes?
Vegeta: Hmm? No, it was purely his idea. Pookee's getting pretty good at it. They're practicing their P's this week.
Goku: (still biting his tongue) Heehee, peas.
Vegeta: Not PEAS, P's.
Goku: Please?
Vegeta: P'S!!! THE LETTER P!!
Goku: No thank you I just went.
Vegeta: AAUGH!!! (slams his head down on the desk)
Chuquita: [pats him on the back] There there, it'll be alright. (notices the tip of Son's bitten tongue is starting to turn
blue) You oh-kay?
Goku: Veggie told me to bite my tongue....it's getting pretty numb actually. I'm afraid I might snap it right off.
Vegeta: (glances up at him) (groans) It was a figure of speech, Kakarrotto.
Goku: That mean I can let go now?
Vegeta: (sigh) Yes, Kakarrot, you can let go now.
Goku: (lets go) *whew*! Good. That feels MUCH better. [feels a tug on his pantleg] (looks down) Oh, HI PLUSHIE!
Vegeta: (glares) Hello PLUSHIE.
Plushie: (whispers to Son)
Goku: Uh-huh....uh-huh....yep...uh-huh... (to Chu) Say Chu, Plushie says he would feel much more comfortable if Veggie sat in
the audiance.....(whispers some more)....or was handcuffed to the back of his chair.
Chuquita: That's cool. (whips out a pair of handcuffs) Hey Veggie--
Vegeta: --looks like I'm about to become part of the audiance today. [gets up and goes to sit in a nearby seat in the
audiance]
Plushie: Hee! [hops up onto Son's lap] Ahh...
Vegeta: ERRRRR... (growls at Plushie with look of enraged jealousy)
Goku: (pats Plushie on the head & giggles)
Vegeta: (growls some more)
Chuquita: (yells) (to Veggie) COME OFF IT VEGGIE IT'S JUST A PLUSH TOY!!
Vegeta: (innocently) Come off what? I didn't do anything!....yet.
Chuquita: Ugh, honestly...you have some real issues, you know that Vedge?
Vegeta: I have no issues...my magazine subscription expired MONTHS ago.
Goku: ...what?
Chuquita: We're going to have to cover his psychological Veggie-mind in a future Corner, Son-San. Remember that for me.
Goku: (thumbs-up) Gotcha!
Chuquita: Join us next time when we interview our special guests, Pookee and Plushie and ask them questions viewers are dying
to know.
Vegeta: (cocks an eyebrow) And what questions would those be?
Chuquita: (happily) You won't know 'til Part 2, Veggie-head!
Vegeta: (grumbles) Well thanks a lot!
Goku: (grins) You are welcome, little Veggie.
Vegeta: ...
Goku: ...
Chuquita: See you in part 2! Later!
Goku: Hasta luego!
Vegeta: Chao.
Goku: ...chao??
E-mail: lac31685@aol.com
By: Chuquita
Quote of the Week: -from "Get Fuzzy"
Rob: Dude...what the cow are you doing?
Bucky: You didn't like being hugged?
Rob: What are you after, Bucky?
Bucky: For example, if you were to place a MONETARY value on that hug, how much would you be willing to pay for--
Rob: Ohhhhhh my.
Chuey's Corner:
Chuquita: Hello and welcome to the first story on our new "upcoming stories" list.
Goku: Well, actually since all the "upcoming stories" are all on the same list this would really be number ni--
Chuquita: (glares at him)
Goku: --ne. Right.
Chuquita: And we also have another brand new "reviewer request" Corner.
Vegeta: (smirks) Which isn't all that new because the review buttons have been frozen for what will probably be the first
half of July due to a hardware "problem".
Chuquita: (smacks herself on the forehead) Must you interupt EVERYTHING I say?
Vegeta: (thinks about it) (happily) Yes.
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) Anyways, today's request was by Lil' Chi Chi who suggested we have Pookee, Veggie's teddy bear, and
Plushie, Son's stuffed "Veggiedoll" as our guests. For any who remember or any who haven't read the fics, Pookee has had
various cameos in my later fics and Plushie starred in two of his own which were, (ironically titled) "Plushie" and
"Little Buddy".
Vegeta: (grins) [plops a small stuffed bear on the desk] Heh-heh. (turns to Son & smiles) Wave to Kakay, Pookee! [waves the
teddy bear's arm]
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) Pookee DOES talk, right?
Vegeta: Hmm? OH! Yeah, sure. (whispers to her) He's a just a little shy, being among the commoners and all.
Chuquita: (flatly) Who you callin a commoner?
Goku: (defensively) Yeah, we're not commonommonommoners. [folds his arms]
[Veggie and Chu stare at him blankly]
Vegeta: (blinks) Uh, what?
Chuquita: Say Son-San, where's Plushie?
Goku: Uhh, I dunno. Hold on. [grabs a nearby rope causing a massave pile of stuffed toys to fall down upon them, nearly
drowning the desk] (pokes his head above the pile) (squeals) WHEE!!!
Vegeta: (gawks) KA--KAKARROTTO WHAT _ARE_ ALL THESE!!?
Goku: My toys.
Vegeta: ...
Goku: ...
Vegeta: Oh-kay, NOBODY should own THAT MANY stuffed animals!
Goku: [reaches into the pile] But they're not JUST animals. For instance... [pulls something out of the pile]
Chuquita: A stuffed pinapple??
Goku: Huh? [looks at the toy] No wait! That's not it. [reaches back into the pile]
Chuquita: Well if you'd tell us what you're looking for maybe we could help you find--
Goku: (victoriously) HERE IT IS! [holds up Plushie] Say hello to my little Plu-chan!
Vegeta: (glares at the doll) Hello IMPOSTER!
Plushie: (yelps) [dives back into the pool of stuffed toys]
Goku: VEH-GEE! WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR! (pouts) Now I have to find him all over again!
Vegeta: (w/big fake sparkily eyes) You know, you don't HAVE to find him. You can just leave him down there. I'm sure he'll
be oh-kay by himself.
Goku: (shakes his head) No, sorry Veggie, but I don't like to leave Plu-chan alone in a strange place for too long.
Vegeta: (snorts) HHMPH!
Pookee: ...
Vegeta: (yells) WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M OBSESSIVE!!! I'M NOT OBSESSED IN THE LEAST!
Pookee: ...
Chuquita: I didn't know that.
Pookee: ...
Chuquita: Really? That's very interesting. (to Veggie) Wow, your teddy here sure knows a lot of, uh, unique things about you.
Vegeta: (to Pookee) I TOLD YOU BEFORE-HAND NOT TO SAY ANYTHING TO HER!!!
Pookee: ...
Vegeta: (weakens) Well...alright, you are forgiven Pookee.
Pookee: (smiles)
Chuquita: (cocks an eyebrow at Veggie) Animal sacrifices, eh?
Vegeta: It's none of your business.
Chuquita: ...right. (to audiance) Anyways, today's fic is intitled "I Do???"
Vegeta: --dee.
Goku: (giggles) Heh-heh, Veggie said (squeaks out) doodee!
Chuquita: (snickers) Doodee...(blinks) Wait, now where was I again?
Goku: The story.
Chuquita: Oh yeah. You know how Veggie always defends his custody over Son-kun by the fact that he's his prince and Chi-Chi
defends her custody over him by the fact that she's Son's wife. Well, we're about to find out what happens when Chi loses
the power that she uses as her best defense against the "ouji" and how she can still lay claim to Son-San here.
Vegeta: (boasts) And saying you saw him first doesn't count.
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) Here's the summary.
Summary: Goku and Chi-Chi find out by TV that the man who performed their wedding ceremony is a fraud and has been just sent
to jail, making their marriage illegal. Now the couple have to find a way to get re-married before the others find out,
namely Vegeta. What happens when Chi-Chi can no longer defend her claim to Son-kun llegally? Will Veggie convince Son to
not get married at all? And what about Gohan and Goten? Are they now illegit??? A G/CC fic.
Vegeta: You know the fact that you said it's a G/CC story automatically says at the same time that I lose.
Chuquita: Aww Veggie, you always lose.
Goku: (grins) It's the law of the land.
Chuquita: Besides, I like using you to test Son-San and Chi-Chi's relationship like that. You're like a, uh, firecracker.
Vegeta: (grimly) You mean I am like some sort of rocket that desperately tries with all its might to reach up into the sky
only to explode in on itself in a firey display of lights?
Chuquita: ...well...yeah. (weak smile)
Vegeta: WELL THAT'S JUST SICK!
Pookee: ...
Vegeta: AND _NO_ I AM _NOT_ BEING OVERLY SENSITIVE!!!
Goku: (holds up his toy) I found Plushie!
Vegeta: (grumbles) Yeah, good for you.
*****************************************************************************************************************************
" READY? "
" READY! "
" Alright then, GO! "
" Ha! I'm winning I'm winning I'm--URP! OH! " Chi-Chi sat back in her chair, cake smothered all over her face and
hands. Goku meanwhile, who was sitting at the opposite side of the table, was still busily digging into the giant vanilla
iced chocolate cake.
He paused and giggled at her, " Heeheehee! "
" Yeah, Very funny Mr. Bottomless Pit. " Chi-Chi chuckled at him, " I'm either getting too old for this or that fat
saiyajin stomach of yours has gotten bigger--if that's possible. "
" Hi Mommy hi Daddy hi--CAKE! " Goten squealed at the huge 7 layer pastry on the kitchen table, " WOW! That has GOT
to be the biggest cake I've ever seen!--HEY! Why didn't you tell ME about this! "
" Oh, sorry sweetie, " Chi-Chi wiped the icing off her face, " You see when Go-chan and I got married he instantly
fell in love with the cake I made for the occation, so, every year to celebrate our anniversary we-- "
" --HAVE A BIG CAKE-EATING CONTEST! " Goku grinned widely, finishing her sentence.
" Since it's been so long since we've been able to celebrate without some threat of some EVIL PRESENSE-- " she
suspicously took a quick look around the room for a certain ouji, " --attempting to blow up the Earth that you probably
didn't know about this little habit. "
" I think I remember Gohan catching us stuffing our faces about 4 or 5 times... " Goku trailed off, deep in thought.
He let out a large belch, then smiled, " He even joined us in the cake-eating fesitvites twice. "
" Can I have some cake Daddy? " Goten smiled, intranced by the chocolate cake
" K! " Goku replied, cuting off a large piece and handed it to him.
" WHEE! CAKE! " Goten cheered, then ran off.
" Well, Goku, despite everything that's happened, including that whole Buu incident last month, I'd have to say
things have turned out pretty good. " Chi-Chi smiled, turning the TV on, " Of course we probably would have been able to have
spent many more anniversaries together had it not have been for that OUJI. " Goku sweatdropped as he heard her fist pound
down upon the table.
" Come on Chi-chan. It's not Veggie's fault. And besides, if he had not escaped from Freezer's clutches and sent
Raditzu to Earth to try and get me to join up with them I never would have been able to meet Veggie and turn him into the
wonderful little buddy he is today. " Goku said happily.
" HA! " Chi-Chi laughed mockingly, " I'm just glad he doesn't know when our anniversary is anyway. Can you imagine
what he'd do? "
" Yeah, he'd come over here and bring us a nice lil present. Maybe one of those fancy plate sets or a bottle of
champagne." Goku said.
" Ho ho ho! I can certainly see him bringing that last one. Course knowing Vegeta he'd probably say something like,
"Why don't you come back home with me Kakay and we can drink this yummy stuff back at my house which is really Bulma's in my
room for EVIL obvious reasons while Onna sits here and twiddles her thumbs". GOD how I wish he would just disappear into
oblivion!! " Chi-Chi exclaimed.
" AND NOW BACK TO THE DAILY NEWS!!! " the TV blasted, knocking both Sons onto the floor.
" Is it just me or are the commercials always louder than the shows themselves? " Goku said dizzily.
" Really? I never would have noticed. " Chi-Chi remarked sarcastically and just as dizzy as her husband.
" Our top story on the news today; long-time fraud Jack Sandelton has been caught. " the newscaster said.
" Sandel-ton, Sandelton. Gosh that name sounds familiar. " Goku rubbed his chin, " Doesn't that name sound familiar
to you, Chi-chan? "
" ... " Chi-Chi's eyes widened in shock.
" Chi-chan? "
" ... "
" CHI-CHAN!! "
" AHHHHHHHH!!! " Chi-Chi screamed, then fell over.
Goku peered down over the table, " Uh, Chi-chan are you alright? " he asked, worried.
" Uhhhhhhhhhhhh.... "
" Jack Sandelton has been wanted by the East City police for the past 26 years for crimes ranging from kidnapping to
armed robbery, but is probably most known for fraud. Sandelton is under arrest for impersonating an officer, a fireman, and
several other important figures. He is know in jail without bail, the hearing with begin on Monday. " the newsman flipped
through his papers, " In other news A boy saves a hen from a flood and new uses for the toothbrush, not to mention a new
brand of toilet paper that allows you to read the news and take a dump at the same time!...you know that could be bad news
for us--*click*! "
" HEY! " Goku whined as the TV suddenly went black, then noticed Chi-Chi, who was still laying on her back on the
floor, holding the remote, " Chi-chan what'd you do that for! I was watchin! "
" ...Go-chan? " she said weakly.
" Yes Chi-Chi? " he blinked, staring down at her.
" Go-chan...come closer... " Chi-Chi motioned him to the floor with her finger.
" Umm, oh-kay. " Goku bent down on his knees, " Are you, alright? "
" Go-chan. " Chi-Chi grabbed him by the collar and yanked him down towards her, " We have a problem... "
" We do? "
" OF COURSE WE DO!!! " she screamed, sitting up, " Don't you remember who that Sandelton guy is!!! "
" Sure I remember Chi-Chi! He's a con-man who was just on the news 5 minutes ago! " Goku said cheerfully.
" ... " Chi-Chi stared at him, " OHHHHH! " she groaned, slapping herself on the forehead, " Why me...Goku? Do you
remember the priest at our wedding? "
" The bald guy Piccolo pied in the face? "
" ...yes, Goku, the "bald guy Piccolo pied in the face". Do you remember his name? " Chi-Chi said, tired.
" Blueberry! " Goku grinned.
" No Goku, that was the flavor of the pie. "
" ...oh. "
" Now what was the MAN'S NAME? "
" Hassenfeffer? "
" What? NO! SANDELTON! HE'S THE SAME MAN AS THE ONE ON TV!!! " Chi-Chi screamed at him.
" Wow, really? I don't remember him having that much hair... " Goku trailed off.
" Not the newscaster, Goku, the man they were TALKING ABOUT!!! THE ONE WHO COMMITTED VARIOUS FRAUDS AROUND THE
COUNTRY!!!! "
" *gasp*! And to THINK I trusted him! " Goku said, slightly offended.
" Oh someone help me. " Chi-Chi shook her head, " Goku, the man on TV is the same man who Piccolo pied in the face
and a FRAUD. "
" You're kidding...what's a fraud? "
" UGGH!!! A FRAUD IS SOMEBODY WHO PRETENDS TO BE SOMEONE ELSE BUT REALLY ISN'T! WHICH MEANS ANY ACT HE PERFORMS ISN'T
LEGAL WHICH MEANS IT DOESN'T COUNT WHICH MEANS---oh my God... " Chi-Chi turned a pale white, almost hearing the ouji laughing
at her in the back of her mind, " Go-chan, hold me. " she said weakly, hugging him.
" Silly Chi-chan! " Goku grinned, hugging back.
" If I told you we weren't really married after all this time when we thought we were would you still love me? " she
asked, trying to stop herself from panicking.
" That's a funny question, of course I would Chi-chan. " Goku chuckled, then paused, " Hey, if we're not legal does
that make Gohan and Goten-- "
" --SHUSH! " she slapped her hand overtop his mouth, " We have to do something about this! "
" Yes, yes we do. " Goku let go of her and walked back over to the table.
" Where are YOU going!!! "
" I'm doing something about this--cake, look at it! It's gonna get all moldy if I'm not here to finish eating it! "
he complained.
" Goku we're going to have to get re-married. For REAL this time. " Chi-Chi said, deep in thought.
" But last time WAS real. At least, I think it was. I distinctly remember a cake similar to this one although you had
hit me pretty hard during that budatucki battle before the wedding and I was still a little dizzy at the time so-- " Goku
rambled on.
" --of COURSE it was real! " Chi-Chi exclaimed.
" Hmm. We should tell somebody about this. " the large saiyajin nodded.
" WHAT! ARE YOU CRAZY!? THIS IS TERRIBLE!! Besides! Who would we possibly trust enough to tell! "
Goku thought for a moment, " Bulma. "
" No way! "
" Why not? She's trustworthy. " Goku pouted.
" I know that, the problem is, as you have so quickly forgotten, that the OUJI happens to reside in the same
household. " Chi-Chi narrowed her eyes, " And if he finds out that out of some bizzare twist of fate that you and I are no
longer nor ever have been married in the first place there would be no way for me to legally keep you safe from his
clutches! "
" Does this mean I am Veggie's Go-chan now? " Goku cocked his head.
" NO AND YOU NEVER WILL BE!!!! " Chi-Chi yelled.
Goku wiped the sweat off his forehead, relieved, " Good. I can't imagine having to massage Veggie's smelly
Veggie-back the same way I massage yours. "
" I bet he can. " Chi-Chi said flatly.
" Huh? "
" Nevermind. "
" I still can't believe I let you talk me into this. " Chi-Chi groaned as they stood on the front porch of Capsule
Corp. Their car parked on the side-street.
" Name one person you think would be a better choice for us to confide in. " Goku dared her.
" ... "
" ... "
" Alright, let's get this over with. " Chi-Chi rang the doorbell, " Maybe Bulma knows some quick legal way to get
this done and over with before anyone else finds out. "
" Oop! Someone's coming! " Goku pointed to the door.
Chi-Chi gulped, " Now remember, look natural. We can't let on something's wrong right of the bat! "
" Right. "
Mirai opened the door, " Oh, hi Son-San, hi Chi-Chi. " he said casually, then blinked. Chi-Chi had a smile frozen on
her face and Goku was now wearing a sombaro on his head, " Uhh, you guys feeling oh-kay? "
Chi-Chi looked up at Goku's sombaro, then swatted it off his head. The large saiyajin sniffled at the loss of his hat
, then quickly followed Chi-Chi inside.
" Yes Mirai, we're both just fine. " Chi-Chi said through her false smile, " Where's Bulma? We need to have a word
with her. "
" What did Toussan do THIS time? " Mirai said dryly and mildly interested.
" Little Veggie didn't do anything. " Goku answered, " Actually, he's not supposed to know in the first place. "
" Know what? "
Goku turned around and almost did a double-take to see Vegeta had appeared out of nowhere and was now standing behind
him.
" As if on cue, right? " Chi-Chi groaned.
" LITTLE VEGGIE IS HERE! " Goku squealed, grabbing the ouji and giving him a hug, " Oh little Veggie where WERE you?
And how did you get behind me so fast? "
" Oh, I have my ways... " the ouji trailed off, then grinned in contentment in the hug, purposely ticking Chi-Chi off
as usual, " You know Onna, you look a little more NERVOUS then usual. Something wrong? " he snickered at her.
" NOTHING is wrong, OUJI. " Chi-Chi said, still smiling, " In fact everything is just fine. "
" But Chi-chan you just told me a minute ago that-- "
" SHH! " she hissed, quickly shushing the confused saiyajin, " We need to go downstairs to the lab to talk with
Bulma. Is she down there? " Chi-Chi said, addressing Mirai and completely ignoring the ouji.
" Yeah, Kaasan's been there all morning. I can't imagine what she's doing. Something "top-secret". " Mirai explained,
" I think it has something to do with paint cans though. The door exploded several hours ago and...well.. " he pointed to
the door-shaped mark on the hallway wall made in bright green paint.
" Heh-heh...great, just great. " Chi-Chi laughed nervously, then grabbed Goku by the wrist and pulled him out of his
hug with Vegeta, " Come on Goku! We're going downstairs. "
" But what about Veggie? " he asked, saddened.
" "Veggie" can stay right here for all I care! Besides, I already told you this doesn't consern him. " she snorted as
they headed down the stairs, the small prince staring down at them from the top of the stairs,
inquizzitively. He waited for them to get out of view, then tip-toed down the stairs after them, snickering menacingly.
" YOU'RE WHAT?! " Bulma gawked, wearing her lab-coat and a pair of goggles. She was splattered in the same green
paint that covered the upstairs wall.
" Not legally married... " Goku said, pressing his two pointer fingers together and looking down at them in
fascination.
" OH BULMA IT WAS HORRIBLE!! " Chi-Chi wailed, " IT _IS_ HORRIBLE! The newscaster said the guy was a con-man who
performed acts of FRAUD illegally! Oh my poor little Go-chan! " she grabbed onto one of Goku's wrists and hugged it tightly,
" What are we going to do! We're not legally a couple anymore and we never were without even KNOWING IT! "
" Chi-Chi I'm losing the feeling in my right hand. " Goku said.
" You're going to be alright, Chi-Chi. " Bulma laughed lightly, " Vegeta and I aren't married and we still love each
other very much. "
" You---wha-wha-WHAT!! " Chi-Chi shrieked.
" Huh? "
" Wait! Go back! "
" That he and I still love each other even though-- "
" NO! Before that! " Chi-Chi demanded.
" That we're not married? " Bulma blinked, confused.
" WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU AND THAT OUJI AREN'T MARRIED!! " she screamed in shock.
" Well, we're married by "saiyajin" standards. " Bulma nodded, " And believe me you don't even want to know HALF of
the little royal tribalistic tasks you have to perform to be considered "opuapa". "
" "Opuapa"?? " Chi-Chi scratched her head.
" Yeah, that's saiyajinese for being married; well; you know, loosely translated anyway. " Bulma shrugged, " There
wasn't any wedding, you two don't remember one. "
" That's right but I remember mine and Chi-chan's but that didn't count, right? " Goku looked down at Chi-Chi, who
thrust his blood-bloated hand away. Goku shook his hand in the air with relief as the bloodflow returned to his arm.
" Honestly! I suppose you can do whatever you want if you're rich. " Chi-Chi shook her head, " But Goku and I can't
go ON like that! I wouldn't feel right. If I no longer have my status I can't keep him safe from the ouji! I mean, now that
we aren't married, Vegeta technically has SOLE OWNERSHIP over my baby! " she said, worried.
" Baby? What baby? " Goku looked around the room.
" That's YOU, knucklehead. " Chi-Chi grumbled.
" Me? " Goku stared at her, then grinned, " Aww, I'm the baby! " he giggled.
" Well if it means that much to you two I can call someone up and have them come over and perform a quick ceremony
for you guys. That way Chi-Chi won't have to worry about Vegeta taking a legal advantage over Son-kun and no one will have
to know the first one was made by a fraud. Oh-kay? " Bulma smiled, coming up with a safe and quick solution to the problem.
" YAY! " Goku cheered, " Isn't that great, Chi-chan! " he said, then noticed her slumping, " I said, "Isn't that--" "
" Oh Goku I can't do it real fast like THIS! " Chi-Chi sniffled, " I want it to be just as special as the first one
was!! "
" Chi-chan I didn't know what a wife WAS the first time. " Goku pointed out.
" ... " Chi-Chi glared up at him. He smiled cheesily, " OH YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!! " she shouted, then started to sob.
" Aww, Chi-chan don't cry. " Goku patted her on the back, " Why we could make pretend that we're just renewing our
vows and that way we can have a big party and make it all up to look like the real thing but everyone else would think it's
the fake thing but we know it will be real unlike the first one which they all thought was the real thing but was really the
fake thing that even we didn't know was fake! " he grinned a classic Son smile.
" ... "
" ... "
" Goku that has to have been the most brilliant idea ever contrived in your little brain. " Chi-Chi said in awe,
" LET'S DO IT! " she said happily.
" HOORAY FOR ME FOR I AM A GEEN-EE-US!! " Goku whooped.
" It's "genius", dear. "
" ...RIGHT! A GENIUS I AM AND HAPPEN TO BE!! "
" I am SO happy we cleared that up. " Chi-Chi said as she cheerfully climbed up the stairs, " This is going to so
wonderful! Thank you for your help, Bulma. " she shook her hand.
" But I didn't really...do...anything. " Bulma said, bewildered.
" We'll call you once we finish picking out things! Right Go-chan? " Chi-Chi smiled at the large saiyajin.
" Wow, two really big cakes in one sitting. " Goku was off musing of the cake they had eaten earlier this morning,
" And all the pastries and deserts and fish and those tiny little hot-dogs you eat off a stick....AND I know what I'm doing
this time...THIS IS GONNA BE THE BEST THING EVER!!! " he squealed, accidently slamming shut the lab door on Bulma's face.
She blinked, " Oww. "
Chi-Chi rubbed her hands together, " And the very best part is the ouji doesn't even know about it!! "
Vegeta suddenly walked by them whistling 'Here Comes the Bride'.
Chi-Chi felt a little cloud of doom hanging over her head, " Oh no. " she slapped herself on the forehead, " Why did
I say that! Why did I say that! "
" Hi again little Veggie! " Goku waved to Vegeta, who stopped whistling and walking for a moment.
" Why hello Kakarrotto-chan who at this time is set to obey only my own personal bidding. " Vegeta smirked, then
noticed Chi-Chi a little nervous out of the corner of his eye, " Say, Onna, how's it feel to know that you've lost by
default? " he turned to her.
" OOH! I HAVEN'T LOST ANYTHING YOU EVIL LITTLE OUJI!!! " she screamed in his face.
" Yeah, except your mind. " Vegeta chuckled. Goku let out a little giggle.
Chi-Chi froze, " DON'T YOU LAUGH WITH HIM!! HE'S EVIL!! "
Goku stopped giggling.
" It's fine, Kakay, you can continue to laugh with me. This onna has no right to order you around. I, on the other
hand, have retained my half of that right and can now fully rule over you, " he looked up at Goku, " How's that sound? "
" ...huh? " Goku scratched his head, confused.
" It means you can laugh as much as you like, Kakarrotto. " Vegeta smiled.
" ...heeheeheeheeheeheeheheeHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHA--- "
" --ENOUGH!! " Vegeta yelled, causing Goku to pause from his giggling, which had turned into loud fits of laughter,
" Now when _I_ say you should stop laughing you DO stop laughing, get it? "
" Like simon says? " Goku asked.
" Yes little Kakay, like "simon says". Only this will be more like "Veggie says". If "Veggie" tells you to do
something, you do it. If someone who is NOT "Veggie"; like ONNA for example; tells you to do something, you-- "
" --DON'T do it! " Goku finished his sentence, smiling.
" Why you little... " Chi-Chi growled at Vegeta, shaking her fists.
" Let's try an example, alright, Kaka-chan? " Vegeta said to the larger saiyajin.
" OH-KAY LITTLE VEGGIE! " Goku saluted him.
" Now, Kakarrotto, SIT! "
He did so.
" STAND! SIT DOWN AGAIN! UP! DOWN! UP! DOWN! UPDOWN!! " he ordered.
Goku panted heavily, somehow sitting down and up at the same time.
" Nice. " Vegeta smirked, " VERY nice. I could get to like this. " he let out a small giggle, " Kakarrotto? "
" *pant*, yes, *pant*, Veggie? " Goku said while trying to catch his breath.
" I want you to give me a hug. " the ouji held his arms open.
" Oh-*pant*-kay. " Goku walked over to Vegeta, then nearly fell down hugging him, " *whew*! Veggie I'm tired. "
" You should be. " an evil smile crept across the prince's face, " Now how about a little smooch on the cheek for
your little buddy? " Vegeta pointed to himself.
" HERE'S YOUR SMOOCH!! " Chi-Chi sent a flying kick at Vegeta's behind, catapulting him through the ceiling...well..
..catapulting his head through the ceiling anyway, " HOW'S YOUR CHEEKS NOW!!! PRETTY SORE, EH? "
" I..think he meant the cheeks on his face, Chi-chan. " Goku sweatdropped.
" Feh, you can't tell the difference between them anyway. " Chi-Chi snickered, " They both look the same to me. "
" Ouch. " Goku cringed mildly, then made his way to the stairs.
" WHERE ARE YOU GOING! " Chi-Chi exclaimed.
" Umm, to help my prince unwedge his head from the ceiling, err, floor. " Goku said, halfway up the stairs.
" HE IS _NOT_ YOUR PRINCE!!! " Chi-Chi screamed, waving her arms back and forth. Goku giggled at her.
" Sure he is, Chi-chan. Veggie is the saiyajin no ouji and I'm the saiyajin so he's my ouji. " Goku explained, then
almost fell over in fright as a huge bright red glow emitted from upstairs. Chi-Chi could see creases of the ouji's glowing
face through the cracks his head made in the ceiling.
" That's it. We're leaving. " Chi-Chi said flatly, " Follow me Goku, I'll drive us back home. "
" I can't. "
" !? " she froze, " WHAT?! WHY NOT!!! "
" Well, it isn't technically OUR home, is it? " he said uneasily.
A few muffled giggles could be heard from the ceiling above them.
" WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S NOT _OUR_ HOME!!! " Chi-Chi screamed, both angry and frightened at the same time.
" Buh-buh-but Chi-Chi, you're the one who moved in with me. So it really IS my house. " Goku nodded.
" BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HE'S GOT YOU THERE ONNA! " Vegeta laughed. A vein bulged on Chi-Chi's forehead as she grabbed
Vegeta by his dangling legs and pulled him down though the ceiling, causing the ouji to fall to the ground.
" Go-chan, you, you can't really MEAN this? Can you? " Chi-Chi grabbed him by the hands.
" Yuh-huh. " Goku said.
" ERR, I HELPED YOU WITH THAT HOUSE! A LOT OF STUFF IN IT IS MINE!!! "
" It won't be again until we get married for real this time. " Goku said stubbornly.
" HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND!!! " she gawked, " WHERE AM _I_ SUPPOSED TO LIVE!! "
" You could live HERE until it's time, Onna. " Vegeta snickered evilly.
" Oh no no no no! There is no way I'm living under the same roof as the EVIL LITTLE MONKEY PRINCE who's trying to
steal my Go-chan from me! " Chi-Chi scoffed at the idea.
" But I'm NOT your Go-chan. Not yet anyway. " Goku shook his head.
" But he's still my Kakay! Right 'big buddy'? " Vegeta grinned, patting Goku on the shoulder, " Say, Kakay? I've got
an idea. Why don't you let Onna use your house and YOU can stay here with Bul-chan and I until the ceremony? "
" Really Veggie? That's very nice of you. " Goku smiled, impressed.
" Yes, it is. " Vegeta snickered, " In fact, I'll let you stay in my room with me. How does that sound? "
" SLEEPOVERS WITH VEGGIE?! " the larger saiyajin's eyes widened, " OH BOY! I CAN JUST IMAGINE!!! " he squealed.
" So can I. " Chi-Chi grumbled, " And that's why you're going to be going home and I'm going to be staying in one of
the guest rooms here. "
" Huh? " Goku blinked, " But Chi-Chi you just said that you'd never live under the same roof as-- "
" Goku I believe it would be much wiser if you were the one to head home for the night. " Chi-Chi said sternly, " At
home I have Gohan, Goten, and my own father to watch over you--to be my eyes for me for a while. But to leave you in this
ouji-complex-of-EVIL would be nearly sentencing you to a fate worse than death! I will sleep here and you will sleep at home.
I want you to get plenty of rest because tommorow we will be informing the others of our, *a-hem*, vow renewing. "
He nodded and walked towards the front door.
" Funny, " Vegeta remarked, " I'd think you'd be a little scared of living in the same house as me? " he smirked.
" Nope. " Chi-Chi smiled, " But YOU should be. "
" ??? "
" Man, who'd have thought nightime at the ouji-hut could be so--boring. " Chi-Chi muttered as she layed on her back
in the guest bed, staring up at the ceiling, " It's a good thing my Go-chan brought me back a pair of pajamas... " she said,
then trailed off, " Oh Go-chan...I hope everything turns out alright. It's been a whole 15 minutes since I've last called. "
she glanced over at the luminous clock on the counter, " Heh, I sound like that ouji. " Chi-Chi chuckled in irony, " But,
I'm not like that ouji, right? " she said, worried, " Fate and destiny. They seem similar, when both focused on a similar
cause, but are not. I believe it was fate that brought us together Goku. By a strange sort of luck that caused our paths to
cross several times, almost like something or someone had meant for us both to possess a dragonball...and for both our
guardians to have been fellow students of Muten Roshi. That ouji, however, believes it is your destiny to be in his service.
That you were born to be together and that's why you both survived your planet being blown up and both became super saiyajins
and have that weird mental connection with one another. Soulmates, HA! That's a good one. What can you tell about a baby's
future before it has even learned to crawl or speak? NOTHING!....I so need to talk to somebody. " she reached for the phone,
only to pause when she heard a wailing coming from down the hall.
" YAI YAI YAI YAI!!!! "
" Eh? " Chi-Chi cocked an eyebrow, creeping out of her room and down the hallway to the source of the noise.
" YAI YAI YAI YAI!!!! "
She looked up to see the sign on the door, " Vegeta's room...why am I _NOT_ surprised. " Chi-Chi groaned, then
sweatdropped when multi-color lights suddenly burst from around the seems of the door. She blinked, bewildered, " Well, no
sense in turning back now, curiosty's peaked. " Chi-Chi shrugged, then slowly opened the door wide enough to peek in. Her jaw
dropped to the floor.
Vegeta paused from what he was doing and stared back at her, maracas in each of his hands. The ouji had a small line
of brown fingerpaint under each eye similar to a baseball player's. He had various blue, yellow, red, and green fingerpainted
insignias on his bare back and stomach written in saiyajinese. He was wearing a light brown leathery loin cloth and a fuzzy
ankle bracelet on his right ankle.
" ...WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING!!! " was the first thing to come out of Chi-Chi's mouth.
" Uhh, saiyajin ritual. " Vegeta responded.
" Are disco-bulbs part of this saiyajin ritual too? " Chi-Chi skeptically pointed up to the disco-light hanging from
the ceiling.
" No that's just for effect. " Vegeta said, then shrugged.
" I haven't seen you do this before. "
" Obviously you've never spent Saturday night at my house. " the ouji answered, then smirked, " The dance and chant
are said to impose the will of the enchanter upon other full-blooded saiyajins. " he then pointed to the thing attached to a
piece of string hanging around his neck, " Especially ones who are connected by mysterious means. "
She stopped and did a double-take, " That's a potara! " Chi-Chi gawked at the earring tied in the 'necklace', " I
thought you destoryed yours!!! "
" I did. I had Dende fix it for me though. I have Kakay's too, but that's hidden somewhere you'll never think to look
for it. " he boasted proudly.
" It's hanging from the side of your loin-cloth jungle-boy. "
" ... "
" ... "
" --GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!! " Vegeta screamed.
" I'M NOT _IN_ YOUR ROOM! " Chi-Chi screamed back at him from the doorway.
" YOU'RE ASKING FOR IT! "
" MAYBE I AM! WHY DON'T YOU COME GET ME! "
" MAYBE I WILL! "
" FINE! "
" FINE! " Vegeta shouted, then ran headlong towards the door which Chi-Chi promptly slammed shut, then heard a loud
thump a second after. She smirked, " Owww... " a small voice came from behind the door.
" Heh-heh-heh. " Chi-Chi chuckled as she walked back down the hallway towards the guest room, " Makes me almost wish
I had a brother. *snort*, the moron. " she entered her room and closed the door behind her.
Vegeta groaned from behind his bedroom door, " YOUR DEEDS WILL NOT GO UNPUNISHED ONNA!!! "
" Goodnight Ouji. " she called from her room.
" I SHALL REEK THE WRATH OF MY ROYAL ANCESTORS UPON YOU! "
" YOUR STENCH REEKS STRONG ENOUGH ON YOUR OWN, OUJI! "
" ...what? "
" Goodnight Ouji! "
" WHAT? "
" GOODNIGHT _OUJI_! "
*****************************************************************************************************************************
8:31 PM 7/7/2002
END OF PART ONE
Goku: Heehee, Chi-chan and Veggie DO act like they're brother and sister sometimes, don't they?
Vegeta: Bite your tongue.
Goku: [does so]
Chuquita: Well I thought it was a pretty good first chapter. [glances to her left; Pookee waddles past her across the table
dressed up like a fighting pilot] What the heck?
Vegeta: (smiles) Pookee's off to his daredevil lessons.
Chuquita: (ask 'um) "Daredevil lessons"???
Vegeta: Yeah, you know, they give you a plane and everything and you spin around like you're going to crash but instead make
all these fancy Earth-letters.
Chuquita: A sky-writing class?
Vegeta: HAI! That's it!
Chuquita: You sent your teddy bear for sky-writing classes?
Vegeta: Hmm? No, it was purely his idea. Pookee's getting pretty good at it. They're practicing their P's this week.
Goku: (still biting his tongue) Heehee, peas.
Vegeta: Not PEAS, P's.
Goku: Please?
Vegeta: P'S!!! THE LETTER P!!
Goku: No thank you I just went.
Vegeta: AAUGH!!! (slams his head down on the desk)
Chuquita: [pats him on the back] There there, it'll be alright. (notices the tip of Son's bitten tongue is starting to turn
blue) You oh-kay?
Goku: Veggie told me to bite my tongue....it's getting pretty numb actually. I'm afraid I might snap it right off.
Vegeta: (glances up at him) (groans) It was a figure of speech, Kakarrotto.
Goku: That mean I can let go now?
Vegeta: (sigh) Yes, Kakarrot, you can let go now.
Goku: (lets go) *whew*! Good. That feels MUCH better. [feels a tug on his pantleg] (looks down) Oh, HI PLUSHIE!
Vegeta: (glares) Hello PLUSHIE.
Plushie: (whispers to Son)
Goku: Uh-huh....uh-huh....yep...uh-huh... (to Chu) Say Chu, Plushie says he would feel much more comfortable if Veggie sat in
the audiance.....(whispers some more)....or was handcuffed to the back of his chair.
Chuquita: That's cool. (whips out a pair of handcuffs) Hey Veggie--
Vegeta: --looks like I'm about to become part of the audiance today. [gets up and goes to sit in a nearby seat in the
audiance]
Plushie: Hee! [hops up onto Son's lap] Ahh...
Vegeta: ERRRRR... (growls at Plushie with look of enraged jealousy)
Goku: (pats Plushie on the head & giggles)
Vegeta: (growls some more)
Chuquita: (yells) (to Veggie) COME OFF IT VEGGIE IT'S JUST A PLUSH TOY!!
Vegeta: (innocently) Come off what? I didn't do anything!....yet.
Chuquita: Ugh, honestly...you have some real issues, you know that Vedge?
Vegeta: I have no issues...my magazine subscription expired MONTHS ago.
Goku: ...what?
Chuquita: We're going to have to cover his psychological Veggie-mind in a future Corner, Son-San. Remember that for me.
Goku: (thumbs-up) Gotcha!
Chuquita: Join us next time when we interview our special guests, Pookee and Plushie and ask them questions viewers are dying
to know.
Vegeta: (cocks an eyebrow) And what questions would those be?
Chuquita: (happily) You won't know 'til Part 2, Veggie-head!
Vegeta: (grumbles) Well thanks a lot!
Goku: (grins) You are welcome, little Veggie.
Vegeta: ...
Goku: ...
Chuquita: See you in part 2! Later!
Goku: Hasta luego!
Vegeta: Chao.
Goku: ...chao??
