"All of us are products of our childhood."
― Michael Jackson
I was born very small. My mother gave birth to me two months early in our tiny family house. My mom had my aunt by her side. She told me the story once.
"I was getting ready to start cooking dinner for your father and me when I suddenly felt a crippling crap in my belly. I tried to ignore it but I knew something was wrong. I tried to get to our neighbor's house but I couldn't walk any farther. I was terrified, I thought I was dyeing or that I was going to lose my only child.
My pregnancy had been a nightmare. I was sick all the time, always aching and crying. I would refuse to eat and just try to sleep all day. Your father was...unsupportive to say the least. I was so afraid that this terrible pregnancy would end in one of our deaths.
I was lucky though. My dear Uruchi, bless her dear heart, wandered in to give me some fresh flowers for the house and saw me sitting against the wall. She took me to the bedroom and helped me give birth to you. You were so tiny! Such a tiny, fragile thing. You barley cried. As soon as your father arrived, he called for a medical nin to help us. She was a young women, Auntie Uruchi didn't trust her, but then she doesn't trust anyone outside the clan anyway...the woman said you were premature and underweight. She also told us your heart...it was underdeveloped. She told us you would die young if you were not careful. But isn't that always a threat to our children in these shinobi villages?
I slept with you next to me in the hospital bed all night. Your lips would turn blue randomly, you would shake and cries raspy cries. I cried along with you; that fear of losing you never left me. But in the morning, just as the sun started shinning, you opened your eyes and smiled at me. That's how I knew you would make it. I could see it in your eyes, there was a light in your eyes. I feel in love with you at that moment. I forgave you for the pain you gave me while I was pregnant and the trouble you caused your father and me. We had bother hoped for a son, to carry on the genius Uchiha legacy but you were sweet and beautiful so we knew we could love you just as much."
Thanks mom.
My parents loved me the best they knew how. My mother, a quiet and submissive wife, loved me in her own ways. Like cooking my favorite dinner after a bad day with the bullies or give me a hug after bandaging up my cuts and bruises. She had a beautiful smile and short brown hair, just like her brother Fugaku, my uncle. She was raised under the thumb of a strong willed father and brother, they taught her about "her place" and the responsibility of the common women. They bother tried to instill in me the same set of values. My mother saw in me something she lost as a child, the hope for a better future. I decided young, watching my father talk down to my mother and her trial behind him as we walked through town, I never wanted to be like her. I had a strong will to rebel from a young age because of the restrictive nature of my family. My aunt was the same way, sweet and submissive.
My father, cold and controlling, never told me he loved me. I still don't know if he ever did. He wanted a son, a strong genius like his nephews, yet he was stuck with a fragile little girl who was his spitting image. We both had dark raven hair and eyes, my thick locks are uncontrollable and tend to spike out everywhere just like his. He worked as a police officer alongside ever other Uchiha man. There isn't much more to say about him. When he looked at me, I felt a combination of fear and longing for love. He was never around but I tried desperately to do well to gain his approve. Until I was about five anyway. It was then I realized my efforts were pointless in his eyes and I shouldn't bother trying to please a man if it meant being someone I wasn't. I was very brave as a naïve child.
I use to be filled with a constant want to show my bravery since I was so little. I had a strange sense of what was right and wrong. I tried my best to not be shy and submissive so I turned into a loud mouth wannabe.
Around the age of five, the attacks began. I was small and obnoxious so I was a constant target for older boys to beat me to a pulp. It all started from one incident. There was a young boy, maybe a year or so older than me getting rocks thrown at him. He wasn't doing anything, just sitting on a swing. They were calling him names but I don't remember what they called him. A fire of righteousness burned inside me and I felt myself lose my common sense. I burst in front of them, eyes blazing, and in my tiny five year old voice I cried, "CUT IT OUT YOU BIG BULLIES!" The group of older kids blinked at me and threw each other devious looks. The ring leader grinned and said, "Aw what a sweet little flower, would be a shame is she got hurt..." They started towards me, cracking knuckles and snickering. I felt my bravery waiver but I stood my ground. The boy being bullied had fled the scene, thanks jerk... I thought as I went through my options.
Run? They'd catch me.
Scream? Who'd even help?
Cry? That will only make them want to kill me more.
Fight? Seems like my own option.
I held my breath and thought of something brave to say, maybe they'd listen to a threat. My voice quivered "Y-You don't know who I am? M-M-My big cousin will kill you. He's a geniusss...I-Itachi Uchiha...you g-guys better watch o-o-ou-out..." Intimidating.
"Oh so if we beat on the little mouse," The leader said eyeing me, "We can fight the big Uchiha rats?" He smiled an evil smile. I tried to hold back my tears as the beating began.
I was reduced to a puddle, a bloody, broken puddle of tears and I don't know what other fluids. The first time I was found by a young man, a shinobi I think. My memory is blurred, I was in an out of consciousness and I was brought home, cleaned up and laid out on my parents' bed. I distinctly remember the look of shear embarrassment and anger in my father's eyes. I am sure he was waiting for an apology for my weakness. He never got it.
Every time I left for the store or to go out and play, they found me and started a fight. I always tried not to run, hoped they would respect my bravery and leave. I think drained my whole self of the bravery I had for a life time in my first 12 years of life. Maybe it was stupid but I always thought I had it coming. They hated my clan and were trying to use me to get to Itachi. I never told him about the beatings.
I respected Itachi, he was like an older brother. He looked at me like a person, not a disappointment. He was the one who suggested I look into medical ninjutsu since I had no really talents in the physical department. He was kind and quiet. He was always willing to teach Sasuke and me a new technique even if Sasuke never wanted me there. I was the annoying little sister Sasuke never wanted. He beat on me when we had family events and older kids beat on me every other time I left the house.
The beatings finally stopped two months after the first incident. I had kept silent about the one sided fights, saying I got too rough with friends or got hurt during training. On the day of the last beating, I was walking back from the store. I was carrying a big, brown bag filled with food for that night's dinner; I was going to help cook that night and I was so excited. As I was lost in happy thoughts of cooking with my mother, I smacked into a hard wall of flesh. A boy, twice my height, stood in front of me with a disturbing smile on his face. Behind him were the boys responsible for my daily trips to hell and back. This must have been an older brother.
"Oi Oi, is this little raven the one?" The tall boy asked.
"Yea, those damn black pit eyes should give her away. She's one of those Uchiha rats." A younger boy spat as the others snickered along.
"Sounds good to me. Maybe Itachi will show up and save her this time. Then I can show him what I'M made of. I am sick of those stuck up jerks!" The tall boy said. He ripped my bag from my arms and threw it to the ground, destroying the contents inside. I was filled with blind anger and felt the tears bite at my cheeks, bitter he got emotion out of me. I looked up into his eyes and asked, "Why? What did I ever do to you!? You people are morons and can't stand being seen as weak so you beat on a little girl? What is wrong with you?! You are all nothing!" I was yelling, acting rashly and digging my own grave. The boys glared at me. This wasn't play anymore, they wanted to kill me. The biggest boy pulled me up off my feet.
"Stupid little bitch, who do you think you are?" He head butted me. My ears were ringing as I felt the barrage of punches and kicks. I felt myself scream but couldn't hear my voice. Suddenly I heard a familiar call.
"Back OFF of HER!" Sasuke called. I heard his kunai whistle by as the boys grunted under his kicks. My vision was blurred as I looked up at him. "What the hell is this he asked?" Taken off guard, he was picked up by the tall boy and thrown out of the way.
"I didn't want to fight more MICE!" The boy spat in my face, kicking in my nose. I was gone. I have flashes of memories left. Sasuke telling me to get up, Itachi pushing off the bullies, hospital white and my mother sobbing. Sasuke told them about everything, he had known about the fights after hearing about them from kids his age. He had only seen it the one time he intervened. He remember his brother telling him how he needed to protect his family from people who abused their power. Sasuke jumped into action to please his brother more than help me yet I knew that somewhere in his heart, Sasuke didn't want me to be killed. I was on the verge of death when I was brought to the hospital.
It was decided that night I needed to be out of the village, sent somewhere I could learn and grow strong without the fear of being killed accidentally. My mother had a dear friend in Suna. She agreed to take me in and care for me as her own while trying teach me the techniques of medical ninjutsu. Barely out of the hospital, I was told to pack my bag and prepare to depart, I was headed to Suna to find a safe home. I just hoped I could find at least one friend who wouldn't want to hit me...
