Endless Seas of Clouds
A Buffy the Vampire Slayer Fanfiction Story
Author: Jason Thompson
Pilamsega@tir.com
October 15, 2000

Disclaimer: Once upon a time there was a guy he wrote a story with characters and settings
he didn't own, but he put a disclaimer on his story and that made it a little less illegal. BTVS and
Angel are owned by Joss, Fox, Mutant Enemy, and the WB. I don't own anything except the
situation characters are in.

Category: Tara/Xander. Jesse/Xander friendship. AU where Tara has her Sweetie.

Spoilers: General season 4&5

Warnings:

Summary: Xander remembers a special day, and shows Tara his favorite thing about his new
apartment.

Rating: PG-13, For sexual situations, implied nudity and cloud watching.

Distribution: Ask First.

Notes: Inspired by Michigan's gray skies. Also an attempt at answer the B/A improv #1
October 13 - October 27; vanilla, ocean, cotton, sympathy.

Dedication: Dedicated to Bri, Mary, Duchess, Dale, Nate, Stone Cold, and Aslan, who have
allowed me to bounce my ideas off them, and Krac, cause she has the evil bunny slippers. And to
the other Tara/Xander shippers, stay the course.

Endless Seas of Clouds

Tara rolled towards Xander's side of the bed and groped for him still mostly asleep until she felt
only rumpled cotton sheets. Her eyes drifted open and confirmed her suspicions, Xander was
definitely not in bed. She sighed and stretched, still comfortably encased in Xander's bed clothes.
She snuggled briefly before deciding that the bed just wasn't as fun without Xander in it with her.
She slid out of the bed and padded out of the bedroom, not bothering with a robe or shirt. The
only person who'd see her naked would be the man who loved to see her naked anyway.

She walked out into the living room and found Xander looking out of the large window from the
couch. Looking out of the window, she saw a cloud covered, gray sky. It was rather dismal. She
looked to Xander, expecting to see a matching look on his face. A sky like that would suck the
life out of people. But to her surprise, she found his lop sided grin planted firmly on his lips and
his eyes bright and happy.

Tara loved Xander's eyes, Willow had once told her when she first started dating Xander, that
Xander was something of a mystery unless you learned to read his eyes. Xander's eyes told you
exactly how he felt, sometimes Tara just liked to sit with him or snuggle up to him and look into
those deep dark pools and bask in the warmth and affection she saw there.

She crossed the room quietly, as she did, Xander noticed her and smiled, holding his arms open
for her. Tara smiled and sat between his legs, feeling his arms wrap around her and hold her
tightly against his chest. She felt his lips press against the top of her head, ushering a sigh from
her. "Morning Tara."

"Morning Alex." She smiled, she was the only one allowed to call him Alex. Xander didn't like
it, until she explained that when he let her call him Alex it made her feel special, almost like they
were sharing a secret. Xander had grown to like it. "I felt a little abandoned." She said teasingly.

She giggled when Xander nuzzled into her throat, "Sorry, its just today's kind of a special day…
I like your shampoo, Vanilla?"

The touch of sadness in his voice and sudden change of topic were not missed by Tara. "Hey,
what's wrong?" Tara ran her hand over Xander's arms in a sympathetic manner. Xander didn't
say anything, and Tara was quickly becoming worried, "Alex?"

She heard and felt Xander sigh sadly, "Did I ever tell you about my friend Jesse?"

Tara nodded, "Some, some stories. I know he was friends with you and Willow for most of your
childhood… and I know he died a couple of years ago, but you never told me what happened."

They sat in silence for a while before Xander began. "Today would've been Jesse's twentieth
birthday… When I was a kid, I had only one friend, Willow. I met Jesse when I was eight. His
family had bought and rebuilt a house that burned down the year before on Willow's and My
block, and Jesse's family moved in. Well, Willow and I went over there the first day, and became
friends with Jesse. Well, Willow and I found out that Jesse's dad was a big time investor, made
all sorts of money on Apple computers and later Microsoft. Well, they had a beach house up near
San Francisco. It became tradition, every August, just before school started back up, Jesse's
family would take Willow and I up to their beach house." Xander laughed, "I had such a crush on
his older sister, she was four years older…"

Tara turned her head and looked at him in an amused manner, "Should I be jealous?"

Xander smirked, "No, she's married to some broker now, or so Willow told me. Anyway, our last
time up there was just before our sophomore year, when Buffy came to Sunnydale. Lots of stuff
happened that summer, Jesse's mom taught me and Jesse how to drive. Jesse told me he had a
crush on Willow, but what I really remember, was one morning. I came out on the back porch,
and the sky over the ocean was like this. It was fantastic looking, just, endless clouds against
endless water. Well I saw his sister sitting on the bench, I froze. Typical fifteen year old fear and
anxiety. She smiled and waved me over, and she told me that the most beautiful thing in the
world is a cloud filled sky, much better looking than a blue cloudless sky."

Tara smiled at the far away look in Xander's eyes. "What happened next?"

Xander shrugged, "Then she made my adolescent fantasy come true, she started talking about
how romantic the sky was like this. I nodded and said I could see it. She turned to me then
leaned over and kissed me on the lips. Nothing earth shattering, but it was my first kiss with a
girl and it was the first girl I ever fantasized about, so you can imagine my shock and surprise.
She pulled back and said that she always thought I was kinda cute for a kid, then went back to her
room. While I was floored."

Tara chuckled and said, "I'll bet."

Xander smiled, but it quickly decayed and his eyes became dark. "A couple of weeks later, my
world was turned upside down by one Buffy Summers coming into my life. I mean I don't blame
her, it wasn't her fault, but, sometimes I wonder, if I hadn't have met Buffy, maybe Darla wouldn't
have turned Jesse…"

Tara turned in Xander's arms and slid up his chest, "Alex… You can't blame yourself either. You
lived fifteen years on the Hellmouth without suffering because of it, you've lived fighting against
it for four. You've been pretty lucky if you ask me."

Xander nodded, then smiled, "It wouldn't have anything to do with you that I'm so lucky, would
it?"

Tara did her imitation of Xander's lop sided grin and said, "Maybe…"

Xander chuckled, they sat silently for a while before Xander kissed her gently. "I just might be in
love with you Tara."

Tara smiled, "Good, cause it's possible that I love you too." Tara then turned back around and got
comfortable. She looked out at the sky, and enjoyed the beauty of the endless seas of clouds
before her.

--The End--