Hello all! This is just a parody, nothing serious, and please do not take it seriously. I just really wanted to write a parody.
Please read and review!
Lord of the Onion Rings
Chapter 1
Many Bleatings
"Gee whiz, Taragorn, can't you control your sheep!
It was a bright and sunny day in Ribbondell, and Gobo the hobbit was getting very frustrated with Taragorn's many sheep. At the moment, Gobo (hobbit. Didn't I say this already? Whatever), Thoromir (cell-phone addicted man), Legoankle (elf), and Gandolphin (wizard) were being chased by Taragorn's ferocious (yet cuddly looking) sheep.
Thoromir shouted, "Make your stinkin' sheep leave! I want to play games on my cellphone!" Everyone paled visibly at his words, and Taragorn fainted, with a thump! facedown, leaving the others to be chased by his sheep.
The elf ran into a tree, and sprinted on, looking dizzy and cross-eyed. "You don't mean it, do you?" He asked the man. Thoromir sighed, "We have some sorta meeting some time. I wanna get on my phone before the meeting begins! And my ipod, people!" The rest of the company fainted clean away, (apparently it was something Thoromir said) with a scream of terror, and Thoromir ran from the demonic sheep.
Later, when everyone revived, they heard Thoromir playing games on his cellphone.
"YEESS YEESS YEESS! "
"NOOOOOOOOOO!"
"YYYEEEAAAAHHHH! GET THE DUDE!"
"SHOOOT! ALMOST! "
"AWESOME, MAN! THAT'S ITTT! NOOOOOOO!"
Gobo groaned as Legoankle stormed into the room Thoromir was in. Taragorn paled, and Gandolphin giggled. "Thoromir's in for it!"
Sounds erupted from the other room.
"GET OFF YOUR STINKIN' PHONE!"
"NOOOO! BOOHOOOHOOO! DON' WANNA!"
"GIVE IT TO ME! NOW! THIS INSTANT!"
"STOP TICKLING ME, YOU ELF OF PURE EVIL! PHONIE IS ALL GOOD!"
"YOU WILL GET OFF THE FREAKIN' CORRUPTING MACHINE!"
"HEY! WANT PHONIE BACK!"
Gobo, Gandolfin and Taragorn heard Thoromir scream like a girl in the other room.
"IT'S THOSE TOTALLY INSANE AND ABSOLUTELY NUTTY BEASTS FROM THE LAND OF ALL THINGS CUTE AND EVIL!"
"BAAAAAAAAHD! BAAAAAAAHD! BAAAAAAAHD!"
There was a scuffling and a bang, and the sound of feet running hard followed. Legoankle and Thoromir were seen sprinting across the ground outside the window that Gobo, Gandolphin and Taragorn were leaning out of, to get a good look at the pursued and pursuers.
The demonic sheep were roaring their war cry:
"BAAAAAAHD! BAAAAAAAHDD! BAAAAAAAAAHD!"
"WHOA THERE, SHEEP!"
And that is how the pair collided with Almighty Ferocious Elf King that Everyone Must Respect, Elkrod. Luckily, the A.F.E.K.T.E.M.R. (Almighty Ferocious Elf etc…) Elkrod was in a hurry and did not take much notice of them. They lived to see another day.
Later on…
"Where's my phonie?"
"Ummm, er, huh? I haven't, like, seen it, like, in, like, forever, like, for a while… "
" Want Phonie!"
Let's just say that Thoromir got really mad, and that Legoankle is hiding in some corner (from the cellphone dude), and that Thoromir had a temper tantrum, because Legoankle squashed the phone, and that everyone else fainted again, because Thoromir realized that he had fifty backup phones in his bags…
At about noon, the dwarf arrived, by a private jet, lugging about ten suitcases. As the others came to greet him, Gobo said, "So, you will want to be careful, because…" He noticed a nervous-looking Legoankle turn a nasty shade of gray. That could only mean one thing. "Run! It's the sheep!"
"BAAAAAAAAHD! BAAAAAAAAHD! BAAAAAAAAHD!"
Everybody scattered and ran. They ran.
But so did the massive (yet cuddly looking) sheep, calling their war cry to the wind.
Taragorn trailed along behind his sheep. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea (as he had originally thought) to train sheep to chase down everything in sight.
"BAAAAAAAHDD! BAAAAAAAAHD! BAAAAAAHHHHHHDD! BAAAAAAAAHDD!"
Author's Note: Once again, just a parody, and I hope you enjoy it. All constructive criticism is welcome!
Please review!
