Dear journal,

It's finally finished. All the preparations are in order. The only thing that's left for me to do is figure out what to have for lunch. Can't go carrying out the doom of humanity on an empty stomach now, can I? That and what I should say to Zim when I present my business proposal to him...

I've always had a grudging amount of respect for the object my extraterrestrial obssesion. And it'll be through his eyes that I'll finally find my greatest satisfaction. He'll recognize me for what I've become and know that together, we can take over this planet without help from his race or anyone else! He'll know that I'm more than the insane fanatic those fools at the Swollen Eyeball think I am, that I'm more than the failure son of my father, that I'm more than the 'weird kid' the malingering, mattress-soiling, sub-literate morons at skool always made me out to be. We can join forces and then together we can rule the entire world!

Or maybe not... It's not his nature to be trusting of anyone, much less me. Or if he does believe, his pride might see me as competition and not as an ally.

Either way, I don't care.

Nothing in all the world matters more to me right now than my victory over the rest of humanity. I'll hear them surrender. I'll hear them beg forgiveness and say that they were wrong. I'll hear them proclaim me as the greatest human to have ever lived among them, including my legendary father!

Then I'll stomp them all flat.

It wasn't until recently that I came to understand how deep my hatred for humanity ran. I knew I hated a lot of them, but I also knew that somewhere out there were good people. I knew there were people who didn't torment and shun the black sheep that didn't follow their flock; people who didn't laugh as they watched you get the crap beat out of you by a bunch of testosterone-high sadists; people who didn't call you crazy for calling the Earth round or saying that aliens exist.

However, the closest I've ever come to meeting such people are the disgruntled sister and workaholic father that I called family.
Still, for years my feelings toward humanity were more along the lines of wanting to prove them wrong, of wanting to hear them admit they should have acknowledged me. But now I'm done making excuses for their selfishness. I'm done dwelling on their unconcern for me. The irony of it all is that it was during an eavesdropped conversation of those "good" people that I came to understand myself and my potential.

It was then that I came to know their ultimate arrogance, their continual lies. There was a darkness in each of their hearts, a cruelty in their generosity. They did nothing good for the sake of humanity. They just used that guise to gain control, to impose their own twisted version of Utopia upon the world. They're not much different from the alien invaders after all.

I wonder if Zim's seen the same truth about his own race? I've eavesdropped on a couple of conversations between him and his leaders and it amazes me how much obvious contempt they have for him, yet he talks and acts as if they he thought they think he's the greatest invader they'd ever known. I wonder if he'll ever be able to see beyond his personal goals and realize exactly where he stands in their eyes. Sometimes I envy that unshakable belief he has in himself, that ability to reject reality and impose his own. Hostile as our relationship to date has been, at least I can say with absolute certainty that I was important to him. He relied on me and my attempts to stop his evil to motivate him in his own work, just as I'd been unable to dedicate my life to 'real science' after realizing that chasing and capturing him had become my own raison d'etre.

I've noticed that lately he's been looking a little deflated. He hasn't ranted or plotted anything for a while now. Maybe he's finally figured it out.

I hope he has, because I really would like to work with him on this little venture. Despite his embarrasingly low success rate in his attempts to take over Earth, I know he's not stupid. Egotistical, yes; impatient, impulsive, loud, zealous, dramatic and he's got some problems getting priorities straight. He's an alien from an advanced race, with access to a universe of power. And yet he stays in school all day, enduring it, hating it, fearing it and freaking out about it. The thought of sneaking out or setting a robot in his place never crosses his mind. He gets so caught up with the most unimportant details, he ends up getting nothing done; He gets a giant robot, and his plan is to go beat me up with it. He's in control of some impressive stuff, but his sense of control is so horrible that it doesn't matter if his plans are foolproof. This would be where I come in... Together, we could become an unstoppable team!

But if not, then so be it. I know what's to be expected of me if I continue down this path, with my back to all that I'd believed in and stood up for, but it's one I'm prepared to walk, if for no other reason than to enjoy the sweetness of the looks on my fellow human's faces when I deliver to them the end of their world as they've known it!

Hmm... I think I'll have a light salad.

-End Dib's Log

AUTHOR'S NOTE

This story was started almost 4 years ago. A massive case of writer's block prevents it from being finished. Figured I'd post what I had before I forgot about it and it became lost forever. I have the first few chapters on file, every other chapter written by Penname wa Silver B. But even her awesomeness has limits! So yeah, enjoy and if you have any suggestions... I'm not promising I'll use them, but I'm open to them. Most of the last paragraph is based on what Jhonen said about Zim in an interview with IGN. Anywho, Thank you for reading my story!