"Red, I'm exhausted," Liz complained to the map holding criminal.
"I swear, I knew where this place was," Red said, turning the map a little as if that would help. If he had known where it was, they would have been there hours ago. "Let's just find a hotel."
"We just passed a cheap place. We could go back to it," Liz responded and got a surprised look from him. "What?"
"You want to stay in a cheap hotel?" He questioned as if she'd grown a second head.
"It's the only place I've seen for miles, I'm tired, and we both know that you can't drive."
"... Alright, just don't complain about how low quality it is," Red stated as Liz turned around.
...
When they got the room, Red actually stared at the desk clerk in disbelief. There were rooms where people had been murdered that cost more than this! The only thing that got him to move was when Liz had grabbed his arm and pulled him away like she hadn't seen anything wrong with what had been said. She ended up having to pull him all the way to their room because he kept trying to look around the hallway.
"Will you just slide the key already?" Liz asked, slightly annoyed. Red did as instructed but ended up staring again when it beeped and showed a red light
"Did it work?" He said. Liz groaned and turned the doorknob. She strolled into the dreary room while Red treaded lightly on the worn carpet.
"I'm gonna take a shower," Liz stated.
"You trust this place to be clean?"
"It's not as bad as you think. Just go watch tv or something," she responded. Red refrained from making a comment about watching her instead. After she closed the bathroom door, Red went to see what had been horrible enough for the low price. He stared for a moment. Everything looked fine.
Lifting up the blankets, he saw that there were no bugs, and the covers seemed to be clean. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad. He picked up the remote before sitting on the edge of the bed.
There was the first problem. Immediately, the bed tipped and sent him falling on his ass. The bed fell back in its original spot but left Red on the floor in shock. He got back up and found a place that wouldn't give way with him. Then, he clicked the button to turn the tv on. It started with a deafening volume and was set on a heavy metal station. After he yelped, he clicked the volume down and changed the channel. If this had been a better hotel, he would have worried about complaints.
"Everything okay in there?" Liz called.
"It's fine! Just startled me," Red responded. Flipping through the channels provided no entertainment. After a while, he turned it off and stood up. He sat the remote down on the chest of drawers. Curiosity made him open the top drawer. A pile of extremely dirty magazines made him slam it again.
Another ten minutes passed before Liz came back out. She was wearing pajamas and carrying her clothes. Red jumped up when he saw her going for the drawer.
"You don't want to do that."
"Why?" Liz asked. Red didn't really want to say porn.
"It's dirty."
"Well, these clothes are dirty," Liz replied reaching for the handle.
"Lizzie, you really don't want to do that," Red warned. Liz went ahead and opened the drawer. Less than a second later, she slammed it again.
"... I'm not letting my clothes touch those," she said before adding, "that didn't look physically possible."
"Let's just go to bed," Red stated and patted her shoulder. She sat her clothes down before crawling into bed. Red striped down to his boxers and undershirt before joining her. He flicked the light off.
They got comfortable before they heard someone go into the room next to theirs. Then, there was the sound of a headboard hitting the wall. Red gave an annoyed sigh before they heard moaning.
"I'm never letting you pick a hotel again."
