A/N: I know I should be writing chapter 2 to my other story but this came to me this morning and I just had to write it. It's short but.. enjoy.
My Love:
I've lost it, my heart that is. In a well of confusion and darkness it sits alone and unknowing.
I try, oh how I try to find the light, to find the answers but they never come. Somehow I fell in love and in that love I have lost all of my self that I knew.
Breaking down, losing my strength, cowering in fear of the new. Perhaps if my love were returned I would feel less afraid, maybe if I were not alone in this darkness the light would find me. This love is a feeling alien to me in so many ways not that I have never been in love but this particular feeling is new.
This depth of love is fresh; never tasted and that enthralls me to feel it more. The object of my love, my ever lasting desire, my heart; sits idly unaware forever mocking me with short smiles or teasing words. Unbeknownst how I ache at the idea of the taunts, the false promises, the lies.
Longing for each syllable of these vows to be in truth, waiting for the moment my dreams are realized and my heart is no longer alone.
And there I am, back to the solitude that is this love. This evil hateful pain filled joy brought to me on the whim of you.
That delicate smile that graces your face when I tell you how beautiful you are; the innocent move of your hip or the careless toss of your hair, the sultry bite of your bottom lip and even the basic crinkle of your nose when you're annoyed drive me to brinks of insanity. And I would change none of it.
As I crave for you I also know it will never be, my heart will live in the realm of the lonely for as long as it belongs to you.
You are the sun and moon and I am merely a growing weed in the face of a beautiful rose garden.
You are an angel soaring high above this insufficient plane and I am desperate to catch you and bring you down to earth.
Me again my love; back to the solitude and selfishness of this. How you must hate me, how you must see me as weak and unfit.
How you must look to me as pathetic wanting only to help me at a distance rather then embrace me close; to solve my ache with your easy words and careless hold.
Why oh why do I love you so? You've cheated me, you've lied to me, lead me into this darkness leaving me to wilt in the isolation of your adoration.
I live in pain because of you. Because of me.
Minako- Even the sound of your name makes me crazy, makes me feel the horrible want that is buried deep within my soul longing to reach you, begging for release. I can not.
What future would it have? I only want you to know these things my love. I only want you to see me.
To think twice before you casually brush my hand, play with my hair or smile at me. I need you to understand that it is hard for me.
That darkness is no where to live and that I go here willingly only for you. Treat me no different then you have in the past for I am not writing you to inject our relationship, only to finally feel some of the light. To feel less of the shame and to finally even if only for a moment feel like myself again.
Rei-
