Disclaimer: I don't own Hannah Montana. I only own the story I write. And a few minor characters that will be in the story.
Present time
Sometimes I wish I had a portable camera with me, to capture moments that I never get to see or to really acknowledge as much. Sometimes the moments that mean the most are the moments that never really get captured, but when that happens, all you can do is snap a picture in your mind and save it. Treasure it and write the date in the back of your mind. Remember the person, the time, the place, and it becomes a mere memory in the next 10 years when you want to look back on your life.
I want to tell him, I want to tell him that I love him. I've been in love with him for as long as I can remember. I feel like I'm screaming it on the top of my lungs and he's just not listening. I'm screaming, "I love you, you big idiot." And he's just shrugging and not reacting to what I've been trying to tell him for the past year or two. I don't want him to be a memory that I'll look back at in the next 10 years, what him and I have… complicated, even though it shouldn't be. He's oblivious, but I love him. I fell in love with the way he teases me. I fell in love with that stupid smirk he makes when he thinks he's so clever. I fell in love with the way he gets me like no other. I fell in love with his smile, no matter how cliché that sounds, because his smile pierces through all the bad in my life and I forget, even if it's for a second. I fell in love with the way he holds me and cuddles with me when we watch old Disney movies together. I'm in love with Oliver Oken, but we're best friends and it's been that way for the past four years.
He's already graduated from Seaview, he graduated last year in the top of his class. He goes to community college, but he didn't really want to leave anything behind yet so I respect that. But, unfortunately, I'm at my senior year and I'm starting to get Senioritis like no other, I just want to graduate now to get away from everything and mostly everyone. That's the problem of starting something now if he were to have feelings for me, I'm going away to college and he doesn't believe in long distance relationships. I want to tell him that you never know unless you don't try, but he won't go for it, and besides… I'm always going to be Miley the dork. The one who he can't see more than as his best friend, I probably have the sex appeal of a door knob to him. I'm invisible to him, and I just want to make him see…see that I've been there, I've always been there and I'll always will. One day…he'll realize that, I just need to know when.
Right now, he's spooning me from behind, we're fast asleep and when you're sleeping next to the one you love, everything becomes clear…it becomes beautiful. Like, the way his head rests next to my shoulder and I can feel his light breathing near my ear. The way his arms are around me and how he's pulling me closer to him, pulling closer to his body. I know by tonight I'll have a hard time sleeping because I'll miss the warmth of his body behind me, I'll miss him.
I never thought we would be this close, I thought that he would be someone who would walk in and out of my life and I would never see him again. Maybe I would see him between the hallways of Seaview High, but that's all. Maybe I would see him randomly at Rico's and maybe say hello to him and ask him how he's doing. No, I didn't expect to fall in love with someone who probably doesn't love me back. But you know the saying, "the best things in life go unexpected."
But wait, I'm getting ahead of myself. I need to start from the very beginning of how this all happened.
September 13, 2008 (flashback)
I was nervous. I was going to meet up with three guys at miniature golf today, one I already knew (and had a crush on) and the other two I just didn't have a clue who they were. I knew Ryan because we go to the same middle school, but the other two guys go to high school. One goes to Ridgeway and the other goes to Seaview. We all talk on Instant Message together all the time, but seeing the people you talk to in person can be nerve wracking. I mean, what if they end up being a psycho killer that wants to chop your head off? That wouldn't be a pretty site.
Anyways, my dad is driving me over there now. I'm surprised he's actually letting me do this. I mean three guys and just one girl? What ever happened to "if a boy ever hurts you, I'll knock the sam heck out of them"? I guess he realizes that I'm growing up…and that I need just a little bit more freedom.
When I saw the three boys, I immediately went to give Ryan a hug first because I had the hugest crush on him. Then, there was Brian and he was the sweetheart out of the three, he always thought of everyone before himself and he was such a giving person. I always admired that about him. Then, there was Oliver. Oliver Oscar Oken. Something about him when I first met him…something attracted me to him, more than any other guy. It was like a perpetual force was pulling me towards him; all I knew at that time was that I wanted to get to know him more. I wanted to know what he was all about. After giving all three boys a hug, we decided to actually try to make it in some holes. Although, I sucked because I have no eye coordination whatsoever and one of the balls landed over the fence…so we kind of just stopped playing after that.
The best thing about miniature golf places is that they usually have arcade games inside of them so for the rest of the time that was spent hanging out, we just did that. We were off doing our own thing, but I just couldn't keep my eyes off of Oliver. Ever since I met him, he's made me laugh like crazy and he's just made it so easy to be around him. I thought I liked Ryan, why am I being like this? Shouldn't my attention be all towards him instead of Oliver?
After hanging out with the boys, my dad offered to drive them all home (I think it's also because he wanted to make sure that these boys are trustworthy and not scumbags) and they were fighting in the back seat (what can I say, boys will be boys). One of them almost broke my camera but Oliver grabbed it just in time before one of them smashed it and I called him my hero and he blushed. I thought Oliver and Brian were both great guys, but Oliver… there was just something that made me want to get closer to him. I wanted to get to know him better, I really did. But, it'll probably be one of those friendships that never lasts, maybe it'll last a year and then we'll never talk again. Or, after hanging out this one time in a group, I never speak to him again. You just never know when people can walk in and out of your life, just like that.
Present time
I still smile when I think about the time when I first met him. It seems like yesterday when I got to see his boyish grin and chocolate brown eyes for the first time. Time has passed by for the both of us, we learned and we grew up. We've dated other people, but yet, there's something that's always pulling us together and it's making me wish what it meant. Did it mean that we're meant for each other? And in some ways, I believe he's my soul mate, but not in the context you think. I believe that a soul mate is a person that makes you the best you there could possibly be. And that's all there is to it.
College is going to be so hard without him. It's getting harder and harder to hang out with him and us ending up like this because I'm falling for him even more and knowing that maybe, just maybe, he's not feeling the same way is killing me on the inside. What if he's playing a game with me? What if we'll never get to express how we truly feel around each other? What if… what if.
I don't know what's worse, me forgetting him… or him forgetting me.
Please Review! Tell me what you think. Sorry for it being really vague and whatnot.
