Title: "A Waxy Situation"
Author: Pirate Turner
Rating: R for adult sexual references
Summary: Lumiere makes a problem for himself.
Warnings: Slash, Het
Challenge: This began as an attempt to answer the ForeverInDisney challenge of 9-11-08 using the words "pants", "snort", "willow", "cramped", and "bottle", but it overshot the limit of 100 words.
Disclaimer: Lumiere, Cogsworth, Ms. France, and Beauty and the Beast are © & TM Disney, not the author, and are used without permission. Everything else is © & TM the author. The author makes absolutely no profit off of this work of fan fiction, and no copyright infringement is intended.

He purred into her ear as he ran his wax carefully over her wood. "What zind of wood is zat, ma cherie?"

She giggled, her feathers shaking provocatively. "Willow, I believe, meisur." Her tone was meant to be seductive and coy, and he followed suit.

"If I had mon pants, ma petite, you'd be makin' zem quite cramped right now."

Her giggling answer was put to an abrupt stop by a loud, indignant snort directly behind the maid. "Cavorting with the help again, Lumiere?"

As Lumiere fell into his regular response, the feather duster quickly made apologies and sashayed away with a wink. The candlestick then collapsed with an arm around his partner. "Ah, mon amour, you came just in time! Come share a bottle of scotch with me?"

His answer came in the form of a stiff shoulder shrugging off his embrace. "Unlike you, I have duties I care to tend to."

Lumiere sighed defeatedly and hung his head as Cogsworth waddled on down the long hallway. Now he had hard wax, and nobody to soothe it for him!

The End