Title: "The Lament of Pants"
Author: Pirate Turner
Rating: R for nudity and sexual references
Summary: Winnie the Pooh and a friend discuss the lack of clothing choices for some Disney characters.
Warnings: Nudity, Mild Slash Reference
Challenge: The last of three drabbles incorporating the words "pants", "snort", "willow", "cramped", and "bottle" for the ForeverInDisney weekly competition of 9-11-08
Disclaimer: Winnie the Pooh, Grandmother Willow, Eeyore, Tigger, and all other characters mentioned within are © & TM Disney, not the author, and are used without permission. Everything else is © & TM the author. The author makes absolutely no profit off of this work of fan fiction, and no copyright infringement is intended.

"Why don't we have pants?"

His companion gave a snort that almost shot out his honey. "Excuse me?"

He repeated the question. "I mean, I don't want to see you get all cramped and stuff, Pooh! We should have pants!"

"At least we aren't naked."

"Of course not!"

"There are those who are."

"Like who?"

"Grandmother Willow."

"Trees don't count!"

"Eeyore."

"He wears a ribbon."

He thought of something he saw bouncing constantly but always pretended not to notice. "Tigger!"

He clanked his bottle down with a thoughtful expression. "You've got me there." He nodded his agreement and lamented, "At least we're not naked!"

"I do wish we had pants. It's so embarrassing!"

The End