Who You Were Born to Be

It had been years since she had worn a white gown of this grandeur.

Ten long years... Sarah thought as she gazed at her reflection in the full length mirror—her emerald eyes taking in the sight before her. The collection of silks, satins, lace, and tulle all woven together to create the wedding gown cascading to the floor. The straps that fell off her pale shoulders were embroidered with sequins and crystals. Her made up eyes stared back at her and atop her head, like a petite crown, was a collection of white roses in place of a veil.

Today was her wedding day—the day that every young girl fantasizes about, the day that every young woman plans for. Well... almost every girl. In her youth, Sarah's mind was not riddled with wedding cakes and the possible bride's maid candidates among her friends. While the girls in her high school were dreaming of the boys in their classes, Sarah was busy dreaming up magical worlds filled with wonder and danger. Her stuffed animals, costumes, and books replaced the excitement that fashion, make up, and boys brought to other girls her age.

She had never thought of the boys in her life in that manner—her head was usually flying high… her thoughts elsewhere. It wasn't until that fateful night when she was fifteen years old that she discovered the power that a boy—or rather, a man—could have on her. A foolish, reckless wish had brought him into her life—his mismatched eyes, his deep, smooth voice, his cocky stance that belonged only to a king. A wish had brought him to her and a few simple words had cast him out of her life as quickly and magically as he had come.

She had changed. He had changed her. For better or for worse.

It had been ten years to the day. At times it felt like it had dragged on for an eternity and yet it had passed in nothing more than the blink of an eye, and now, here she was—twenty five and ready to start a new chapter in her life.

She had not been searching for love—if anything else she had avoided it, now knowing the pain it could bring her. She had gone from a child, nothing more than a brat to a young woman who was quiet and accepted the life that she had all in a single night. She had graduated from high school with no more friends than she had starting her education and she had made it through college without too many mishaps. Occasionally, she would feel a pair of eyes peering at her back only to turn and find herself to be alone. There were several times when she thought she saw something out of the corner of her eye—something that looked just like a goblin. One of his goblins.

She met John in her senior year of college. He had pursued her and wooed her, acting like nothing short of a gentleman ripped out of one of Sarah's romance novels. He was only a few inches taller than Sarah with short black hair and a pair of brown eyes that seemed to always smile down at her. He was not necessarily the most attractive man to ever grace the planet but his loving personality had drawn the girl to him. He was kind to her and seemed to want to make her truly happy. There were no coarse words escaping him like the boys from her high school, no inappropriate and disgusting movements and gestures like the other young men of the university, and no patronizing, overconfident grins like him.

Sarah had not been looking for love but it appeared to have found her, itself.

That had been three years ago—the day she and John had met—and now here she was, about to make herself Sarah Douglas.

A shiver ran down her spine as she felt that all too familiar feeling. Someone was in the room watching her.

Sarah spun around, eyes wide with anticipation just as her step-mother opened the door, a smile on her face.

"Karen," Sarah sighed in relief. Ever since that night ten years ago, she and Karen had started over and began to have a relationship that a mother and daughter aspire to have.

"Sarah," Karen closed the door behind her before walking over to where Sarah stood before the mirror. "You look so beautiful. A real life fairy tale princess!" she joked, both of the women thinking back to Sarah's obsession with the stories and tales within her books. "Are you ready?" she whispered with a reassuring squeeze on Sarah's shoulders.

"Karen," Sarah hesitated. She was afraid to utter her trepidations aloud in fear that upon hearing them would make them all the more real.

"Sarah, what's wrong?" Karen spun her step-daughter around to look at her. She raised her hand to Sarah's flushed cheeks, wiping away a tear. "You're make up is going to run, if you don't stop," again, she tried to joke, hoping to raise Sarah's spirits.

"Karen, I..." Breathing in deeply and slowly for a moment, she tried to collect her thoughts before continuing. "Do you think I'm doing the right thing?"

"What do you mean, Sarah?" Karen's brow furrowed in concern.

"I mean, am I doing what's right for me? I've never dated anyone other than John. How do I know if he's 'the one'? What if he's not the one I'm supposed to be with? What if—"

"Sarah," Karen hushed the flustered bride. "You can't really think that there's only one person in the world for you?" She smiled for a moment before she realized, "Do you?"

Suddenly feeling foolish, Sarah whispered through her nervous tears, "Well I did until about thirty seconds ago..."

"Sarah, you really truly believe that God put only one other person in the world made just for you?" Karen asked as she sat down in one of the overstuffed arm chairs in the country club's room.

"I would like to think so," Sarah slowly began to wipe her tears away, hoping that with them, her fears would also vanish.

"I blame those stories of yours," Karen muttered more so to herself than Sarah. "Sarah, life is not like one of your fairy tales. There is no love at first sight or true love and there is certainly not only one man in this world that can make you happy. Okay?"

When Sarah didn't answer her, Karen rose to her feet, lifting Sarah's chin up so she could look into her step-daughter's eyes. "John is just one of the possible men that were made to love you and make you happy. I met your father after he had already married your mother. Love is much more complicated than just two people seeing each other and instantly falling in love. Don't worry yourself about this. John makes you happy, doesn't he?"

"Yes."

"He loves you, right?"

"Right."

"You love him."

Sarah paused for a moment before she breathed, "Yeah."

"So what are you so worried about?" Karen laughed as she pulled Sarah into a hug. "Now come on," she spun Sarah around to look at herself in the mirror again, "let's fix that makeup before John sees you and runs away screaming."

"Very funny," Sarah rolled her eyes.

Karen couldn't help but laugh. It had been years since she had seen Sarah roll her eyes at her—in a way, she had missed it.

As Karen moved from touching up Sarah's makeup to playing with her hair and adding a bit more hairspray to the loose curls that were rolling down Sarah's back, Karen whispered:

"Well at least you don't talk to yourself in the mirror anymore—I'm sure John would have just loved that." She smiled at Sarah, hoping to pull some laughter out of her.

But Sarah's eyes widened as she looked up to Karen's reflection in the mirror. "Wh—what do you mean?"

Sarah's nervous reaction caused Karen to look at her. "Nothing. I was joking, sweetie!"

"What did you mean?" Sarah begged, her eyes wide.

"When you were younger... I would just hear you talking to yourself in your room a lot. I didn't think it was too big of a deal. You were much more open and friendlier to Toby. You were only fifteen or so… Sarah," she paused, hoping to get her point across. "I was joking."

Sarah was no longer listening to Karen's chatter as her mind raced back in time in a wild frenzy. Back to a time when some of her innocence had been stolen. Back to when she was only fifteen. She would gaze into her mirror in her room, her pale yet beautiful face surrounded by photos of her mother, and she would call out:

Hoggle? I need you Hoggle...

And there they would be—Hoggle, Ludo, and Sir Didymus. At first, they would appear in her room. She could touch them, hug them, talk to them for hours on end. As the years went on, their ability to appear became feeble and soon they could only appear to her from beyond her mirror. They grew fainter and fainter until even their comforting voices could no longer reach her. It had been years since she had seen or heard from any of them and she had begun to try and convince herself that it had been nothing more than a dream. A magical, wonderful dream.

"Sarah?" A voice pulled her from deep within her past.

Sarah and Karen looked to see a pair of big, bright blue eyes peak around the door.

"Toby," Sarah smiled as the ten year old boy ran into his sister's open arms.

"You look so pretty, Sarah," her brother smiled at her. Sarah wrapped her arms tight around the boy—her precious baby brother.

She let the boy go and held him at arm's length and observed. "And look at you, my little Mr. Man!" She looked at the mop of golden curls on top of his head, his blue eyes, the little tuxedo that appeared too big on him, and his black converse sneakers. "So handsome."

"Are you guys ready?" He looked up to his mother. "Everyone is here."

"We'll be ready in a few minutes, Toby," Karen ruffled her son's hair and sent him back out of the room. "Sarah," she turned to the bride to-be. "Are you ready?"

Sarah thought about it for a moment. She needed to stop living in the past. The dwellers of the Underground had let her be—they were allowing her to live the life she was born to live. The life she had been living before the mistake she had made that night. She was born to meet John and marry him. She would leave her whimsical childhood behind her and live the life that young women everywhere dreamed of.

"Yeah," she declared, her chin raised in what she hoped to be confidence. "I'm ready."

Sarah found herself to be holding her breath as her father escorted her down the aisle. The sun was shining and the birds seemed to sing a symphony composed just for her. She looked to her left and right—the multitude of John's friends and family and the small collection of Sarah's few acquaintances and family members. She frowned for a moment as she thought of her mother who could not be in attendance due to the fact that she was in the middle of filming a movie. She looked up to her cousin, Candace acting as her Maid of Honor, looking picture perfect with her brown hair piled up on top of her head, the pink dress fitting her perfectly. Sarah suddenly felt self conscious around the girl. Even her wedding dress didn't fit her just right with her wide hips and thin midsection. But all of Sarah's nerves melted away as John's smile fell upon her.

She heard nothing of the preacher's sermon on love. She continued to smile at the man that she was about to wed. His large, rough hands held tightly onto hers, squeezing throughout the ceremony, his smiling eyes meeting hers. Never breaking his gaze, he answered the preacher's rehearsed question with a confident, "I do."

"And do you, Sarah Williams, take this man, John Douglas, to be you lawfully wedded husband? To have and to hold, from this day forward? For better, for worse, for rich, for poor? In sickness and in health? 'Til death do you part?"

Sarah smiled up at John, her questions and doubts seemingly washed away.

"I—" Her eyes snapped up to the tree just beyond John and the rest of the groom's party. Widening in horror, her eyes took in the sight before her. A single, solitary barn owl sat perched on one of the branches of one of the massive trees that surrounded the ceremonial area. Oh God... she silently cursed. No!

"Miss Williams?"

"Sarah," John squeezed her now quivery hands. "Honey, are you alright?"

"I'm..." She dared to raise her eyes to the branch again to see that it was empty. "I'm fine. I'm so sorry. Where were we?"

"You were about to say, 'I do.'" John smiled down at her.

"Right! Sorry!" She could feel the blush flood her cheeks as she whispered, embarrassed, "I do."

"I know pronounce you, man and wife!" the preacher proclaimed. "Mr. Douglas, you may now kiss your bride."

John gently placed his hands on Sarah's cheeks and lightly pressed his lips against hers. As quickly as the kiss had began, he pulled back, leaving Sarah wanting more. As wedding kisses go, she deemed it to be somewhat anticlimactic. No big deal, Sarah thought as the Preacher presented her and John as Mr. and Mrs. Douglas. We've still got tonight.

The reception was on the grounds of the country club. The tables were lit up by Japanese paper lanterns that hung above them. There was a DJ and a dance floor that remained empty as the songs continued to be the usual pop, hip-hop, and R&B. Trees surrounded most of the party with a large hedge creating a wall behind the table where the bride and groom sat.

"What was with that today?" John leaned over to whisper in Sarah's ear.

"What?"

"With the vows? What happened there? Did you forget your line?" He mocked jokingly.

"No, of course not. I just," she sighed, resigned. "I just thought that I saw someone I used to know."

"At the ceremony?"

"Yeah. But it's not a big deal, it was nothing," Sarah rushed to sip from her champagne glass hoping to end the conversation.

"If you say so," he pushed the chair back and stood up.

"Where are you going?" Sarah asked, looking up at him.

"I'm going to mingle with the guests—it's what a host does."

"Oh," she whispered. They had sounded sweet but the words had been meant to hurt.

"I'll be back." He smiled as he tweaked her nose. She hated that. It made her feel like he saw her to be nothing more than a child.

"Okay."

Sarah counted the number of glasses of champagne in front of her, each one of them empty. It had been over an hour since John had left her and only a few of her family members had come over to her, giving her their well wishes and congratulations. Luckily, Toby became her saving grace, as the champagne was running dry.

"Hey, guess what Sarah?" He sat down in John's seat next to his big sister.

"What?" she asked, smiling for, quite possibly, the first time all night.

"You see that?" His small finger pointed to the hedge behind her.

"Yes."

"Guess what it is?" He smiled.

"It's a bush."

"No!" The boy jumped up and whispered in her ear, "It's a labyrinth!"

"What?"

"You know that little red book you used to read all the time?"

"How do you—"

"It's true! Come with me!"

The boy grabbed his sister's hands and pulled her up from her seat. There was a bounce in his step from the excitement he couldn't hide.

"This way!"

"Toby," Sarah muttered, suddenly feeling some of the champagne from the night.

"You'll like it, I promise! I already went through it!" His chest puffed up in pride.

"What? You went through the labyrinth?" Unnecessary fear filled her chest as she thought back to the monstrous maze she had fought her way through so many years ago.

"Yeah," he looked at his sister, confused. "It's super easy. Come on," he pulled her along. "The entrance is over here."

Allowing her brother to lead her away from the party, Sarah found herself standing at the mouth of the labyrinth. It wasn't nearly as intimidating as the one she had wandered through but it was still filled with darkness and shadows as the sun continued to set behind the trees.

Sarah stopped short of the hedges, pulling Toby back as well.

"What's wrong?" he asked looking up at his sister. "Sarah?"

"Toby, go back to the party," Sarah whispered.

"But—"

"Go!"

The boy, confused and hurt, slowly walked back to the loud music of the party leaving Sarah alone in the dark. Beneath the distant music she heard something that she didn't want Toby to see... something she didn't want to see. Picking up the hem of her wedding gown, she silently crept to just beyond the mouth of the maze. Giggles, muffled squeals, and the sound of lips smacking met her ears as she turned the first corner.

"John?"

The couple cloaked in the darkness came into view as they jumped away from one another. Sarah's cousin, Candace was fixing her top and trying to cover the smeared lipstick across her face. Sarah's husband, John, began trying to tuck his shirt back into his pants and trying to come up with something to say.

"J—John?" Sarah's voice quivered as her eyes filled with tears for the second time that day.

"Sarah, I—"

"What have you done?" She screamed out—horrified, hurt, and ashamed. "How could you?"

"Sarah," John reached out, slowly to touch her as she began to back away. "Sarah, listen to me," he whispered as his hand wrapped around Sarah's wrist, pulling her to him.

"No!" she screamed out. "Don't touch me! Just get away from me..."

"Sarah!"

She turned on her heel and began to run. The cries of her husband and cousin were lost in the thundering sound of her heart being ripped into pieces, being scattered across the labyrinth. She lifted her white gown high above her knees and let her legs carry her. To where she was uncertain. But they had never betrayed her before—she trusted them. Deeper and deeper into the labyrinth she ran until she could no longer hear the noise from the reception. The darkness filled the labyrinth, making it impossible to decipher which way was right or wrong. And yet Sarah continued to run. She ran from her past. She ran from her future. She ran from the people she loved and those that she hated.

As Sarah's mind grew numb and her lungs began to protest, something caught her foot causing her to fall to the ground in a blur of white lace and tears. She lay there, dazed.

Even if you get to the center of the Labyrinth, you'll never get out again...

"Hoggle..." Sarah cried out softly.

Her reality had become much too painful for her to bear, so she decided to slip into the dream world that she had created for herself long ago. A place filled with magic and wonder. Where everything was possible. Where she was invincible. Where no one could hurt her. No one.

Her eyes closed and her world grew dark as peace finally fell on her.

No sooner had she escaped deep within her thoughts, than someone appeared beside her. Dressed head to toe in black, he was a sight to behold. A pair of black boots donned his feet. Tight black pants clung to his slim, yet muscular form. A loose black shirt revealed a hairless chest and showed just how strong he truly was. Black gloves covered his hands and a pendant resembling a crescent moon hung around his neck. A loose robe draped over his shoulders, blowing in the silent wind. His mismatched eyes—one brown and one blue—gazed down at the woman who had once been a force to be reckoned with.

Within the silence of the labyrinth, his soft, deep voice whispered her name as if it were more precious than a prayer.

"Sarah..."