A/N – Here is a new little one shot. Rachel is 13 and a freshman at McKinley. Shelby has always been a part of her life and shares custody with Hiram and Leroy. You may want to go back and read a few of my other one shots before reading this one. All of my one shots operate within the same universe (except one called Grounded). A story called Starting Tomorrow is about Rachel's first day of high school. It'll give you a little insight into how the year started for her and how she feels about it. You've Got to Be Carefully Taught and Skinned Knees and Ice Cream Cones deals with Rachel and Quinn and how they relate to each other. There isn't a lot of Quinn in this, but she is there.
The title comes from the song of the same name by The Carpenters. It's an amazing song; everything by them is. If you know the song, you'll know why it fits here.
I've been having some horrible days of my own recently and this little piece gave me a nice outlet and helped me add to the world of the one shots. I've missed writing them and hope to be able to get more out soon. I hope you all like this one. Please, please leave me a review and let me know.
Disclaimer – I don't own Glee. I do, however, have Idina Menzel locked up in my basement so that I can get her to sing to me whenever I want. I'm totally kidding. I don't have a basement.
The sound of Rachel's locker shutting reverberated through the empty hallway and she dropped her hands to the side in a defeated motion. This wasn't her day at all. She'd been in a sour mood all day and the 13-year-old just wanted to be left alone. She was just sick and tired of everything. She was tired of high school and tired of her peers and the slushie attacks she endured, and the school year was only a couple months old. She liked most of her teachers; all except her math teacher Mr. Phillips. She couldn't stand him. And it was his fault that she was alone in the hallway because he'd kept her after class to go over the test she'd done poorly on. Again. She didn't understand his teaching, mainly because it was non-existent. He'd write on the board that he wanted pages 22-30 done and that was it. Every time Rachel had a question he would tell her to look at the example in the book. She couldn't believe he was getting paid for this.
The first time she ever failed a test was in his class and she'd felt horrible when she had to take it home and show her parents. They tried to work with her on her homework, but she just didn't get it. She explained that he didn't go over anything in class and Leroy went in to speak to him about it. All that did was make Mr. Phillips target her and pick on her even more. It wasn't his fault she didn't understand his teaching style. He told Leroy how he saw the potential in Rachel, but that the girl just simply wasn't living up to it. Maybe if she wasn't so lazy or maybe if she paid more attention she would start to get it. Everyone knew that she hated math and so Rachel needed to work harder.
Rachel was trying. But if she really looked within herself, she would agree that some of what he said was true. She did hate math. She didn't want to have to do the homework. She wasn't learning it as quickly as everyone else. But he wasn't teaching anything either! She had always struggled with math, but she was willing to work hard. But the less he did, the less she did in return. She hated his self-righteous attitude toward her and how he treated everything she did as not good enough.
And to top it all off, it was only Monday. But at least the day was over and she would be out of here in a second and then go to her mom's house. She hoped to be able to not think about this place at all until the next morning. Maybe she could be sick and not have to come to school at all tomorrow. That sounded like a good plan. One consolation she did have was that the test grade she received from Mr. Phillips was a D and not technically failing so she didn't have to show it to anybody. That worked out because she knew her parents had all been disappointed in her other grade. She promised them she was working on it and trying to get better and it would just be easier not to have to show them this time. Nothing changed after last time anyway so what did it really matter?
Rachel turned away from her locker and headed for the doors. She'd have an hour or maybe two before her mother got home and Rachel was desperately looking forward to the solitude.
"Hey, beautiful."
Rachel stopped and looked up angrily at the creep who had just stepped in front of her. Jacob Ben Israel had been annoying her since the start of the school year and nothing she did got him to leave her alone.
"Go away, Jacob," Rachel said as she tried to side step him.
"What's the hurry?" Jacob stepped in front of her and blocked her path again.
"Leave me alone," Rachel said. She stepped around him again and huffed in annoyed manner.
"Date tomorrow night?" Jacob asked, blocking her again. "I can get my older brother to drive us."
"Not in a million years," Rachel said. "Are you too stupid to understand English or are you just too dense to take a hint? I do not want to talk to you or be around you or have anything to do with you. We are not friends. You do not get to barge into my life whenever you feel like it. Stop leaving messages on my MySpace page. You do not get to offer me opinions or try and make small talk or anything else with me. Leave me alone. You are creepy and disgusting and I don't want to have anything to do with you."
Rachel missed the two Cheerios that were walking towards them during her rant.
"Trouble in paradise?" Santana Lopez sneered. She seemed to take delight in this as she took a slip of her slushie.
Rachel looked over at Santana and Quinn and the slushies they each carried and sighed. How could this day possibly get any worse? Her eyes met with Quinn's and she shook her head when the blonde's softened ever so slightly. Quinn still called her names and picked on her like she had always done, but Rachel knew better. She'd seen glimpses of Quinn that no one had ever seen and that made that blonde girl's taunts and bullying all the more cruel. Quinn remained silent and Rachel looked away.
"No trouble," Jacob said. "I was just talking to my-"
"Nothing," Rachel said. "Leave me alone."
"But Rachel, I know what's best for-"
His words were cut off when Quinn tossed her red slushie in his face. Rachel and Santana looked at her in shock.
"Shut up," Quinn said. "I just can't listen to the sound of your voice anymore." She held an air of being so far above any of this and they were lucky that she even deigned to be there.
The two Cheerios started to walk away and Quinn put a hand on Rachel's shoulder and turned her towards the door and gave her shove. It was slight, but it caused Rachel to take a step forward and she realized Quinn was just getting her out of their way.
"But I-" Jacob's words were cut off once again when Quinn took Santana's blue slushie and threw it at the boy.
"You really are stupid," Quinn said. "Shut up."
Rachel decided to keep walking and she could hear Santana complaining about not having her drink anymore. At least Jacob didn't say anything else. Rachel turned around and looked back when she got to the door and saw Jacob stalking off in the other direction. She caught that Quinn turned to look back at her before she and Santana rounded the corner and were gone from view.
Rachel tried to push Quinn and stupid Jacob Ben Israel from her mind as she walked home. She was hoping her bad mood would start to wear off as she walked. She would get to go home and lie down or simply surf the internet by herself in silence. She found people to be especially annoying today and she didn't want any more to do with them.
Rachel didn't expect to see any cars when she got to her mother's house and her shoulders slumped when she got close and saw that the driveway was full and there were cars parked on the street. Why were there people there? She started to change course to go to her fathers' house, but she never actually altered directions. Storm clouds were starting to darken the sky when she reached the front porch.
Rachel could hear the music before she entered the house and sighed when she realized that all of Vocal Adrenaline was there. Great.
"Hey," Shelby said as she stepped out of the living room and greeted Rachel by the door. "How was your day?"
"Fine," Rachel mumbled. "What is everyone doing here?"
"There were issues with the power at the school so we moved practice here," Shelby explained. "A generator exploded in the neighborhood or something."
"Oh," Rachel said. She stepped past her mom and headed for the stairs.
"You can stay and sit in with us," Shelby said.
"No thanks," Rachel said.
Shelby was confused as she watched Rachel go. Her daughter was no stranger to Vocal Adrenaline and Rachel normally jumped at the chance to join in with them. She always had. Rachel had been a fixture with the group since she was a small child. Shelby only wished she could convince Rachel to transfer schools to go to Carmel. Rachel had been resisting since before the school year started.
"What's up with her?" sophomore Jesse St. James asked when Shelby went back into the living with her students.
"I don't know," Shelby said. "Ok, everyone. Let's get back to work."
Rachel tossed her bag aside in her room and flopped down on her bed and brought her arm up to cover her eyes. Of all days for the house to be full of people. They were singing already and Rachel didn't want any part of it.
Rachel tried to go to sleep and that didn't work. She put her headphones in to block the noise and that didn't work. She just wanted there to be silence. Even though she was normally quite social, Rachel knew when she had reached her limit. And she was past it. She resented everyone downstairs for intruding on her time.
After an hour of trying to tune everything out, Rachel gave up and decided to leave. She picked up her school bag and descended the stairs and worked her way through the crowd. Shelby watched her from across the room and frowned when she saw Rachel step outside with her bag. It was raining and had been for close to an hour. She took advantage of the break she'd given her club and made her way towards the front door.
Shelby closed the door behind her when she stepped out onto the porch. She was glad to find Rachel sitting in one of the rocking chairs and not out in the rain.
"Hey, Rach, what are you doing?" Shelby asked as she approached her forlorn daughter.
"I was going to walk home," Rachel answered. "I didn't realize it was raining." She hugged her school bag close and looked out to watch the storm clouds; she couldn't help but think how perfectly they matched her melancholy mood.
"I thought you were staying here tonight," Shelby said. "Your dads are going to that meeting tonight."
"I am," Rachel answered. "I just wanted some time to myself today and there are so many people here now. I sent you a text message that I was leaving. I figured you'd see it later."
"What's wrong, sweetheart?" Shelby asked. She crouched down next to the chair and rested her hands on Rachel's arm.
"Nothing," Rachel looked down. "I'm just having a bad day. But I'm fine. I'll go back up to my room and stay out of the way."
"Rachel," Shelby tried to stop the girl as she got up and quickly walked back into the house.
Shelby stood back up and stared out into the rain for a few moments before going back inside herself. She hated seeing Rachel so upset. Shelby made quick work of rounding the members of Vocal Adrenaline up and telling them that the practice was over. She sent them off with instructions to drive carefully and practice individually when they got home. The kids were confused by their coach ending practice unusually early, but no one complained. Jesse wanted to ask if she was sure, but his friends knew better and ushered him out of the house.
Rachel let out a long sigh as she opened her school bag and sat down on her bed. She decided that she may as well do some of her homework and get it out of the way since she didn't want to be downstairs with everyone else. She picked up her math binder and looked at her homework page. She only needed to complete four pages for tomorrow and she'd be done. It was a battle between doing it and getting it out of the way now or tossing it aside to do later but having it hang over her head until she got to it. Deciding it was better to do now so at least her evening would be peaceful, Rachel reluctantly pulled out her calculator and a pencil and opened her text book.
It took about ten minutes to get everyone out of the house because the kids had to pack up their bags and say their goodbyes to each other, but it had finally emptied out. She found her phone on the kitchen counter and pulled up the message Rachel had sent her earlier. 'I'm going to go home. Will everyone be gone before dinner?'
"Rachel?" Shelby knocked on the closed bedroom door. "Honey?"
Rachel wiped at her eyes and picked up her binder and text book and tossed them to the floor in frustration just as her mother walked into the room. She hated that she was crying over math homework.
"Rachel, what's wrong?" Shelby asked with concern. She stepped past the thrown books and sat down on the bed next to her daughter and pulled her close.
Rachel gave up trying to fight her tears and leaned into her mother and clung to her. Shelby cooed to her and rocked them gently as she rubbed Rachel's back soothingly. It took a minute or two, but Rachel's tears finally started to slow and she ended up sniffling pathetically.
"What happened to your practice?" Rachel asked.
"I ended it," Shelby said. "Everyone's gone."
"Oh," Rachel said. She sat back away from her mother and wiped at her eyes.
"Tell me what's wrong, sweetheart," Shelby said as she brushed some hair back behind Rachel's ear.
"I've just had an awful day," Rachel said. "I didn't sleep well last night and I woke up in a bad mood and nothing has helped it get better. I didn't want to be there today and then stupid Mr. Phillips and stupid Jacob."
"That boy?" Shelby asked. "Is he still bothering you?"
"He always bothers me," Rachel said. "Quinn told him to leave me alone maybe he'll listen to her." She left out the slushies because Rachel still wasn't honest with her parents about the fact that she was normally a target. The dirty clothes in her bag could attest to that.
"Quinn?" Shelby was surprised. Quinn was a hard subject to tackle at their house because while Shelby held so much compassion for the girl, part of her would like nothing more than to throttle that kid over the way she treats Rachel.
"Yeah," Rachel sighed. "It doesn't matter. It was just a long, awful day and I couldn't do anything right." It was already October and she still didn't have any friends. High school was supposed to be different. She'd never had a class she didn't understand before; then again, she'd never had a teacher this bad before either.
"Oh, honey, I'm sorry you've had a bad day," Shelby said as she pulled her close again. "We can just have a quiet evening here and you'll feel better in the morning."
"Can I stay home tomorrow?" Rachel asked.
"I doubt it," Shelby sympathized with Rachel's pout. "Why did you throw your books?"
"I didn't understand it and I got frustrated," Rachel answered.
"I'll help you," Shelby said.
"Let's do it later," Rachel said.
"Let's just do it now and get it out of the way," Shelby said. "At least the math homework. And then we'll take a break and do the rest."
"Ok," Rachel nodded.
Shelby got up from the bed and picked up Rachel's books while the girl got up and went over to her desk. In opening the notebook to find where Rachel had left off, Shelby found the test that had been handed back that day with the D on it. She frowned as she looked it over and her glance darkened when she saw the note that was written on the bottom from Mr. Phillips. 'Very poor work. Perhaps you should try to actually study. A little bit of effort on your part would be greatly appreciated.'
Shelby was angry. She knew how much work Rachel put into that class. She had helped her study for this test. She had heard complaint after complaint about the way Mr. Phillips taught his class. Shelby looked up and saw that Rachel was watching her and when their eyes met, Rachel quickly looked away and lowered her head.
Shelby made her way around the bed and over to the desk and set the book and binder down and then pulled out a chair so she could sit next to Rachel.
"Did you try your best on this?" Shelby asked.
"I don't know," Rachel answered honestly and more tears formed in her eyes. "I don't understand why I don't get it. And I get so frustrated because he won't answer any of my questions. When I was taking the test I was getting upset because I couldn't figure the problems out and then I just assumed most of them would be wrong anyway. I should have tried to focus better. Mr. Phillips always puts me down when I don't know the answer and so I get tired of even asking. He doesn't like that Daddy went in and talked to him."
"It's ok, sweetheart," Shelby said. She let Rachel rest her head on her shoulder and she set the test down on the desk. She made a mental note to call the school in the morning and set up some meetings. And she planned on talking to Hiram and Leroy again because it might be time to transfer Rachel to Carmel whether she liked it or not.
"I'm sorry," Rachel said. "I'm trying; I just can't do it."
"You can do it," Shelby said. "I know you're trying. I will look into finding you a tutor. We will work this out, ok? So no more crying. Let's finish up this homework and having a relaxing night."
Rachel nodded and sat up and wiped at her eyes. They must be red by now.
It took about an hour, but Rachel and Shelby finally finished the math homework. Shelby wasn't great at the subject either, but she did her best to help her daughter. As promised, Shelby told her they could stop but Rachel wanted to get it all done then. She made quick work of her history and English homework while Shelby made dinner.
The meal was quiet and Shelby did her best to cheer Rachel up and the girl tried to put on a happy face for her mother, but they both knew it wasn't working. Shelby let Rachel's normal chore of doing the dishes go and the girl gratefully disappeared into her room. Shelby left her be for a while because she wanted Rachel to get the space she needed. She had had those days where you want nothing more than to get some time alone with your thoughts.
Rachel put her earphones in and pulled her chair up to sit beside the window so she could look out at the rain. She started on of her favorite playlists on her iPod; one full of slow ballads and sad songs. After a while she was barely hearing the music and she wrapped herself in the solitude and finally started to feel better. At this moment, she'd still rather not have to go to school tomorrow, but she wasn't completely dreading it either.
It was fully dark when Rachel left her room and ventured downstairs to find her mother. Shelby was at home on the coach as she worked on notes for Vocal Adrenaline. She looked up and Rachel and smiled when she heard her walk into the room.
"Is that all for Sectionals?" Rachel asked.
"Yes," Shelby answered. She moved some papers to the side so Rachel could sit on her lap. "It's only about a month and a half off."
"I haven't heard anything about McKinley' glee club yet," Rachel lamented. "And Mr. Ryerson is weird."
Shelby chuckled and gave Rachel a gentle squeeze. "Are you feeling better?"
"Yeah," Rachel sighed. "I was just so tired of everything today."
"I know, sweetheart. Everyone has days like that," Shelby assured her. "Tomorrow will be better."
"I know," Rachel said. "But I still think I should probably stay home from school just to get it all out of my system so that the day after will be even better."
"Ha! No such luck, kiddo," Shelby said. "You're going to go to school like you do every day, with your head held high and a smile that no one can touch."
"Yeah," Rachel agreed half-heartedly. "I'm going to do some laundry before I go to bed."
"I have a load ready if you just want to throw some stuff in with mine," Shelby said. "Just leave it and I can do it."
"I'll do it," Rachel insisted.
"Suit yourself," Shelby shrugged.
Rachel went back upstairs and got the bag of her slushie stained clothes from her book bag and rinsed them out as best she could. This was an all too familiar routine for her. She went into her mother's room and found the laundry full laundry basket and added her now wet clothes to it. She grabbed some more dirty stuff from the hamper in her bathroom and then took it all down to the basement to start a load. She didn't mind if her mom switched them to the dryer, but she had to be the one to start the wash.
Rachel fell asleep early that night. She was tucked away in Shelby's bed when the woman went to look for her. Rachel always felt safe in her mother's bed and this was no exception. Shelby sighed when she saw she had a little visitor. Rachel was tiny, but somehow managed to take up most of the bed. Shelby tucked the blankets tighter around her girl and leaned down and kissed her head.
"Sleep tight, Rachel," Shelby whispered. She wished her good dreams and happy thoughts as she left her to her slumber.
A/N – I hope you all like this one. Please leave me a review and let me know. Your feedback is so important to me.
Math was pretty much the bane of my existence in high school. I'm still pretty sure I never learned how to count properly. Quite frankly, there's never any reason one should have to try and figure out what X is.
