You're Not Sorry: Kogan Sonfic

"All this time I was wasting
Hoping you would come around
I've been giving out chances every time
And all you do is let me down"

It was the fifth time that week that Logan had asked his parents if they could spend time together. Every single time he asked, he was either shooed away, or got 'no' as their reply. He told them how much he loved them, he was always a good kid…but they never seemed to notice. The only time they ever talked to him was to tell him how much they were disappointed in him. He was upset considering the fact that he had tried so hard, just to find out, it didn't work at all. It hurt.

"And it's taking me this long
Baby but I figured you out
And you're thinking we'll be fine again
But not this time around"

Years passed, and Logan still tried so hard to gain his parents approval. It never worked. Things only got worse. His parents began to go away on trips constantly. They would just leave him. When he cried, they never cared. It was all about how they felt…if they were busy, their son's sadness didn't matter. Logan couldn't remember the last time they told him that they loved him back. It was so far back in the past, it seemed like it didn't happen in the first place. They would come home like nothing happened, but Logan still had the urge to cry when he saw them. It hurt.

"You don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
this is the last straw
don't wanna hurt anymore"

Logan couldn't take this anymore. He didn't like that bad feeling of when he saw them. he gave up. He stopped trying. Whenever they called him, he ignored it. When the phone would ring, his heart sank. What if it was them? But one day…that wasn't the case. It was Kendall. His best friend was always there for him, but it wasn't the same as having a parent around. It hurt.

"And you can say that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did before
You're not sorry"

His parents meant every hurtful word they said. When they called him worthless, they meant it. Tears poured from Logan's eyes as he cried into Kendall's shirt, like he always did. Other than Kendall, nobody was there for him. It hurt.

"Looking so innocent
I might believe you if I didn't know
could've loved you all my life
if you hadn't left me waiting in the cold
"

Thing would have been perfect if his parents just loved him. They had a wonderful son, but they left him. They seemed like nice normal parents, but masked behind that was darkness and pure coldness. They had no heart, and it rubbed off on Logan. Logan tried to trust others, but it seemed impossible sometimes. What if they left too? It hurt.

"And you got your share of secrets
And I'm tired of being last to know
And now you're asking me to listen
Cause it's worked each time before?"

Every single time they apologized, Logan accepted it, but this time was different. One too many heart breaks. He couldn't stand it. Every time they would just lie about coming home for real, it made Logan so upset. He hated being upset, but it happened often. It hurt.

"But you don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don't wanna hurt anymore"

They could leave him now. Logan had Kendall. He didn't need them. Or did he? He wanted them to be around, but he was sick of waiting around. Kendall soon became like Logan's brother. He filled a little bit of the hole in Logan's heart. Some was still unfilled…empty. It hurt.

"And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did before
You're not sorry"

Logan didn't believe any sweet thing his parents said. It was all fake. He believed them too many times…it never worked. He was done trusting them. He leaned on Kendall. It worked. Some of him wanted to run back to his parents, but he couldn't. It hurt.

"You had me falling for you honey
And it never would've gone away, no
You used to shine so bright
But I watched all of it fade"

Logan watched as his parents left. He couldn't trust anyone. It was too hard. After what had happened, it wasn't just hard…but impossible. It hurt.

"So you don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
There's nothing left to beg for
"

Logan was done. He had stopped now. His parents left him for good. They kicked him out and told him to never come back. Wishing wasn't something he could do anymore. He lost all hope. And then Kendall came again in all the darkness. He showed Logan there was a light…when it felt like nothing was there. Logan wanted to accept Kendall but it was still hard to trust. It hurt.

"And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did before…"

But this time Logan isn't sorry anymore. His parents aren't either. It's the past. Logan knows Kendall is going to be there forever…and when he apologizes it's real. It doesn't hurt when Kendall's there to guide him.

Just wrote this cause it popped into my head :) hope you liked it!

xoxo

~EMiLY