Attention aspiring scientists and inventers my name is Kowalski. I'm the second in command of Team Penguin, the go-to options guys, and the Zoo's resident scientist. I have invented many things over the years…some of my inventions I admit go horribly wrong. (Skipper: Some?) Okay most of my inventions go horribly wrong. The following is some of my favorite creations some that worked perfectly and a few that didn't. each invention comes with a brief history and whether it worked or not. I attached a list of files that I recommend you read before continuing. Also watching several episodes of The Penguins of Madagascar is highly recommended. Also if a remember the episode/story the invention came from I'll put it next to the invention name.
-Kowalski
P.S
The Super-plane, The Car, and The LARV will not be listed here as I don't considered them inventions but as vehicles. I have included the different versions of the Sub as I do consider that an invention of mine. Other Peoples inventions or weapons we…aquired from others are not listed either as I didn't invent them. (So I apologize if I appear to be missing The Dalek-busters, Dalek-Class weapons, Dalek-slayer, Pain Cannon, TARDIS, Sonic Screwdriver, that time machine or EMP Cannon from the stories) The Inventions of Dr. Blowhole are not included as a result of that. The only exception is Private's Steel Penguin Suit.
The Stories(so far)
Part One
The New Adventures
Operation: Arendelle(Special)
Operation: Dalek part one
Operation: Dalek part two
Prehistoric Invasion(Special)
The Return of the Red Squirrel
Frozen « the revenge of the southern isles
The Battle of Madagascar(special)
Earth's Darkest Day part one: The Secrets of Africa
Earth's Darkest Day part two: Collison Course
Conclusion
Elsa and the Riders of Berk (prelude to The DreamWorks War)
The DreamWorks War
Part Two
A Very Penguin October part one
Terror of the Daleks(Special)
The Return of The Destroyer of Worlds
Revenge of The Nanites
Jiggles Returns
Revenge of the Graveyard Eight
Ghost in the Tardis
The Second Dreamworks War
The Battles of Berk
The Siege of Far Far Away
Monsters Vs Daleks
Danger at the bottom of the World
Battle in Metro City
The Final Battle
A Very Penguin October part two
The Nightmare (revenge of Pitch Black)
The Battle before Halloween
Operation: Sub Zero(Special)
Operation: Cold Turkey (special)
Villainmageddon
Part One: Blowhole and Company
Part Two: Attack of The Daleks
Part Three: The Glorious End
Conclusion
Return of the Puffin: Part One
Return of the Puffin: Part Two
Bonus story
Penguins of Madagascar: alternate version
Part Three
A Very Penguin December
Gift of the Daleks
Cyber-men in the Snow
City of the Penguins
Revenge of the polar bears
Day of the emperor penguin
The Second Treasure of the golden Squirrel
Rise of the Phoneix
Return of Dr. Blowhole
Daleks in Russia
return of the octopus
The Frozen Earth
Twelve Days of Daleks
D-day
Wrath of the Daleks
Battle in Seattle
Battle on the moon
Fall of Skaro
The Fall of Dalek-Sec
Battle for Chicago
Dalek offensive (one shot)
War across time and space part one
The Oncoming storm(War across time and space part two)
Return of the Timelords(War across time and space part three)
Christmas Special: The Time of The Daleks
Conclusion
Penguin New Year (one shot)
Part Four
The Newer Adventures(to be updated)
War of the Daleks part one: The planet of war(Special)
War of the Daleks part two: Operation Free Earth (Special)
The Ultimate Adventure
The Cyber-invasion
Bonus stuff
Kowalski's Inventions
Tales of Arendelle
The Pirates of Arendelle
Frozen: The musical
The Dalek Invasion of Arendelle
The Surprise (one shot)
Part Five
Penguin Days of Summer part one
Kingdom Come Again
Wrath of Egypt
Yet Another Revenge of Dr. Blowhole
Here comes the Daleks
Revenge of Nanite-Daleks
The Return of the Amarillo Kid(one-shot)
Across the multiverse
Another Earth
Afro Circus Penguins
The Return to the Prime Universe
Into the Medusa Cascade(special)
Penguin Days of Summer part two
Back to The Base
Lost in Prehistoric Times
Night of the Reptiles
The Red Squirrel Strikes Back
Conclusion
Compromised!
Part Six
The Third Dreamworks War
The Return of Drago
Monsters Vs Daleks rematch
Revenge of The Fossa
Battle of the Jade palace
The Battle of New York
The Wrath of Dr. Blowhole
The Fall
Victory of the Puffin
The Three Betrayals
The Fall of the Zoo
The Return
Kowalski: Attack of Dave(One-shot)
Private: Escape from Hoboken(One-shot)
Rico: The great Xscape(One-shot)
Skipper: Escape from Denmark(One-shot)
Operation: fighting back
Conclusion
Prelude: The Night of the Penguins
The Day of The Penguins(Special)
Extra:Holiday oneshots
Halloween 2015
Christmas 2015
Penguin New Year 2015
Part Seven(WWIII)
The Final DreamWorks War
The Beginning
Monsters vs. Daleks 3
Battle of europe
Back to the valley of peace
the last battle
Kai's revenge
Aftermath
WWIII
Defcon One(one shot)
Defcon Red(one shot)
Escalation
World War Dalek
Part one: Judgement of the Daleks
Part Two: Fury of the Daleks
Part Three: Daleks no more
Part Eight(Summer Adventures 2016)
More Penguin Days of Summer part one
So you think you're the elitist of the elite
Escape from Komodo
From denmark with revenge
Attack of Professor Blowhole
Endangerous species 2
The day of the peacocks
Wrath of the peacock(three part special)
The Return of the Peacock
The Fury of Lord Shen
The Demise of Lord Shen
More Penguin Days of summer part two
Revenge of the phoenix
The return of the fishcakes
Battle of July 4th
The revenge of Mr. Chew
Caught in the act
Agent Declassified
Conclusion
ATTACK OF THE REAL SKORCA
Part Nine(across the multiverse II)
Kowalski's Guide to the Multiverse
Part one
Team penguin under attack
Welcome to Jurassic Park?
Where no penguin has gone before
The New Dreamworks War
The Dream Destroyer raises
Showdown in Madagascar
Battle of Gongmon City
Fires of Shanghai
Attack on North Wind
The Final Showdown
Part two
Dr. bottlenose vs Dr. Blowhole
Penguin Wars
Penguins assemble!
Will the real team penguin please stand up?
Conclusion
Battle for the Multiverse
Part Ten(the holidays)
Halloween terror(Special)
Thanksgiving of Doom(Special)
A very Penguin Christmas
Gift of the cybermen
Dalek Invasion of Macy's
There is no such thing as Julianary!
Operation: Snowday
The Battle of Christmas Eve
Conclusion
Countdown: 2017
Part Eleven(Unexpected Files)
Ghosts of Zootopia
The ruins of Zootopia
Doom of Zootopia
Battle for Zootopia
The Unexpected Files
Revenge of the cyber-daleks
Jurassic Zoo
The Return of the Wrath of Egypt
Kowalski's Inventions
A
Adora-Blizer (Cute-Astrophe): Determines how cute someone is to determine their adorability levels.
Success/failure: Success even though it was destroyed by an overload from Private's Hyper-Quantum Adorability.
Anti-grav socks(The Penguin who loved me): I invented them in order to combat penguin flightlessness. During the test I fell out of the socks and they floated away. It would have been less embrassing if a certain Parker didn't show up.
Success/failure: they worked too well.
Anti-matter fusion reactor core(Work Order): Provides non-environmently hazardous power to our base and my experiments/inventions. Helpful especially after the lychee nut disaster. Almost went critical when Private broke the water-main when Him, Skipper, and rico were returning from air combat drills and the zoo called in a repair man. The repair man named gus only did things one way (the right way) even though we finished the job for him. Some quick thinking from Skipper after the ten plagues plan failed averted disaster. Can rip into the fabric of the space-time continuum if disturbed(don't tell The Doctor) Success/failure: success as the base and the zoo is still intact and we still have power.
Amnesia Mist(truth ache): Stored in a ketchup bottle, it makes you forget things. Can make anyone forget anything they know recently, which depends on how much mist exposure is received. I keep it in case if a penguin accidentally (or purposely) spills the beans as I will now demostrate…(spray)…Where was I? Oh yeah Amnesia Mist makes you forget things…I store it in a ketchup bottle.
Success/failure: Let's see...(spray)…Let's see...(spray)...let's see…(spray) Let's...Um Success.
B
Brainwashing Helmet (field tripped): Wipes memories (Like the MindJacker only not as dumb looking). If anyone were to see the penguins on a mission, the helmet would make that person forget about it. I was originally going to use on a school boy who somehow knew a lot about us but opted to use it on his teacher.
Success/failure: Success
C
Cake 2.0 (Penguins of Madagascar Nintendo D.S): When Julian forced us to throw him a birthday party Skipper declared operation birthday banzai. Skipper put private in charge of the song, rico decorations, and me the cake. I designed a cake with roller blades, satetile guided positioning system, and self propulsion. But unfortantly it went on a ramape when I activated it but couldn't turn it off. We chased it across the zoo and thanks to both us and the lemurs deploying anti-cake defense measures (I.E. Rico and Mort) ended the delicious rampage. Julian declared it the best birthday party ever so it was a success anyway. As for Cake 1.0…that's a culinary disaster I'd like to forgot.
Success/failure: a delicious success…sortof.
Clone-o-tron(endangerous species): Using a rare Higgs Boson particle (or God particle) it was suppose to bring back an extinct penguin. However due to a mix up in the hall of avian extinction (Rico) it brought back a Dodo that was well…really dumb. The Dodo who called himself Dode was a dare-devil and ended up killing himself. Skipper made me bring him back several times but it always resulting in Dode exploding or dying. Skipper declared no more clones but a ton of dodo clones exploded out of the base causing the machine to overload. The machine exploded sending the only Higgs boson particle in the known universe into space (The One made in the Cern particle accelerater in Switerland doesn't count). Skipper declared war on extinction and gave us a prep talk to stop the Dodo's second extinction. Of course while he was talking three dodos blew themselves up. We tried to save them but no matter what we tried the result was the extinction of what appeared to all the Dode clones. That was until Julian showed up with the original Dode of that batch. We brought him back to the hall of avian extinction and tricked him into an endless staring contest with the stuffed dead dodo. The machine was never used again until I decided to clone a dinosaur with it(I don't want to talk about it but if your want to learn about that day read Prehistoric invasion).
Success/failure: success but it doesn't work as efficiently without the higgs boson particle.
Chrono-o-tron(It's About Time): My attempt at a time machine, I couldn't call it time machine as that was taken as was TARDIS. It worked as two mes from the future both with different ideas of how to save the future appeared before Private and Skipper. One of them wanted to destroy it while the other wanted to make sure it was built in order for him to go back in time in the first place to warn everyone. Both ended up failing and all three of us ended up meeting. I went back in time to stop it, the first Kowalski went back in time to ensure it's creation while the second Kowalski stays behind thus becoming the current me(confusing I know). The Universe ended disaster was averted by throwing the Chrono-o-tron into the black hole it created. Success/failure: Failure as it threatened to end the universe and almost created a paradox.
Chronal-Curbulater AKA Stop-watch(Time Out): Stops time while allowing duration to continue (helpful for finished unfulfilled goals). Invented as a means to stop time in order to do things we would not normally have the time to do. Due to julian mistaking it as an actually stop-watch and his sour mango punch gum I ended up trapped in time with Julian. After julian forced me to do a song and dance I invented inventions that I won't oridinary get to make (with missions and everything else). I realized that julian left his bubble gum…everywhere; A building, the zoo alice's cart, people, roy, skipper, Rico, Private, maurice, mort, his throne, and of course...The Stop Watch! After removing the gum I unfroze time. As for what Julian and I did when we were stuck outside of time? That's between me and julian.
Success/failure: even with julian's gum gumming up the works it was a outstanding success.
Churrostifishinitizer(Big blue marble): Makes the dream the unbelieveably delicious Furro a combination of Fish and Curros nature's most perfect foods.
Success/failure: Success at first and then failure as it releashed toxic substances that endangered the Earth.
Crankatronic Spinal-Straightener(operation good deed): It may look deadly but it was designed to realign one's back. Or rather it was repurposed to realign one's(i.e: Mason) back as part of Operation: good deed.
Success/failure: Success (Mason still didn't want anything to do with it though)
Cold Fusion Beverage Chiller( Brain drain): Cools beverages invented thanks in part to the genius potion
Success/failure: Success
Copter-packs(Best Laid Plantains): another flying device built so we could catch up to Marlene and Julien before the Gorillas could hurt them. The Jet Packs were unavailable, The Planes was being updated for more leg room, and Marlene and Julian stole the Car.
Success/failure: Success even though Julian made Marlene get the blame even though it was all his fault.
Cyber-bomb: (read a very penguin Christmas: gift of the cybermen) A bomb I built to destroy the cyber-men. It probably would have succeed in defeating the cyber-men once and for all but I failed to take in account the cyber-fleet.
Success/failure: success
D
De-Gowser, The (Sting Operation): was only suppose to make Private as dumb as mort so he we could defeat the hornets. Of course being dumb cause him to make all of us stupid. It almost worked until we got distracted by julians feet. Mort got mad at this and used the de-gowser to have revenge.
Success/failure: Success until Mort had his vengeance and I picked up some of Rico's brain(so horrible).
Dream-o-Vison: device that can see into the dreams of anyone. Basically it's a television with a helmet attached to it. Its purpose was to discover what the nightmare we all had at the same time was and why we couldn't remember it.
Success/failure: Success leading to an adventure that I can say with certainty we all would like to forget. (Read Very Penguin October: The Nightmare)
DNA Analyzer(Miss understanding): Device that can find out what gender you are. Invented to see which of us were female as a result of Alice's comments.
Success/Failure: Semi-failure as Skipper came up as female due to a power shortage rather than a failure on the machine's part. Once I got rid of the tounge scrachers Skipper's result was male.
Dolphin Positioning system/DPS (Dr. Blowhole returns again): A system I devised to track the movements of Dr. blowhole after he took over all the world's transmission stations. It works in a similar fashion to GPS utilizing a network of satalites. And once we retrieved it from marlene's place we located blowhole's base. And once located we fought our way to blowhole's nerve center and foiled blowhole's plot(again)
Success/failure: success.
Duo-tronic Laser targeting system(driven to the brink): Meant to engage an auto pilot that can target anything. Rico crashed the car during a unauthorized late-night drive and in his rush to rebuild the engine accidently installed it. The System locked on to Rico gaving the illision that the car was haunted and managed to scare the pants off Rico.
Success/failure: Successful in scaring the pants off of Rico.
E
Electro-Pulse Cannon(byte-sized): Can short circuit any machinery. Was designed to take down the nanites(See Nanites, The) when reprogramming failed.
Success/failure: Success
Emergency Evacuation Launcher(Night and Dazed, Operation antartica): designed to quickly eject anyone out of the Zoo. Of course we had to use it on a extremely paranoid leanord the koloa (I think he took the rumors started by Alex a little too seriously). Another time we used it to return a Young Leapord Seal to antartica. Private of course being the big hearted penguin that he is ended up ejected as well.
Success/failure: success.
Enemy detector (best foes): meant to detect enemies of course it ended up detecting our friends instead. A incident caused Skipper's mind to be reprogrammed to view his friends as enemies and his enemies as friends (Strangely he didn't view Blowhole as a friend maybe because Skipper hates him so much). We managed to reprogramme Skipper's brain back to normal. Julian attempted to undo that in order to make Skipper his friend again (he ended up making Mort view The Feet as enemies). During the final battles of The Third Dreamwork War I used the old flawed programming to turn blowhole's Chromeclaw against each other. I use it to bluff the Daleks, Cyber-men, and sontarians into thinking that it was the Zoo's self-destruct (Read The Fall: The Defeat)
Success/failure: both
Extend-O-Grab (I Know Why the Caged Bird Goes Insane): A niffy little invention based on the human hand. Quiet useful when you don't have thumbs(even thought It made me miss Invexbo). I received the ultimate compliment in the form of a Space Squid choosing it over all the greatest human inventions. Marlene and I managed to put a stop to it's plan to use it to help the Space-squid cause.
Success/failure: a painful success
F-G
Freeze Rays(Smotherly Love): Can freeze things. I keep all three of them in the basement(No the actual basement not the secret levels). Despite the claim that they were still in the basement they still showed up during The Fall: The Defeat)
Success/failure: Success even though I keep them down in the basement all the time
Furnace Cooling Attachment(tagged): After we updated the furnace I forgot to attach the furnace cooling attachment to the furnace. As we were trapped in our habitat (thanks to the ankle tags) we commissioned Julian, Mort, and Maurice to install it for us. The Lemurs managed to attach it…to the AC unit. We told them to flood the whole place to relieve the pressure and stop the destruction of half the city.
Success/failure: Success even though Julian attached it to the wrong unit.
Genuis Potion(brain drain): In an attempt to boost my own intelligence I combined various kinds of omega-3 fatty acids. The results of the potion increased my intelligence (for a short time). Eventually I lost all my intelligence and became dumber than Mort (according to Skipper). In the end due to a mix up with the zoo's food cannon I ended up buried in fish. After my dumb self ate the fish my intelligence was restored. Success/failure: Failure as it made me dumb.
H
Helmet, the (The Helmet): a device that translates thought into action. An attempt to show Skipper that the mind is stronger then brute force. It worked brilliantly but too bad Julian saw it and wanted it as his own crown. Despite Maurice telling him it was a bad idea Julian stole the helmet anyway. After firing Maurice Julian set the helmet to ten (to get his Chinese food from china) and due to his low intelligence his chaotic thoughts almost destroyed us all. Thanks in part to maurice and a well aimed blast from Rico's rocket launcher we managed to rescue julian. Success/ failure: success even though King Julian got ahold of it.
Hologram Projector(Hoboken surprise): Projects a hologram of the team so the human won't know that we were gone. Perfect for going on vacations
Success/failure: Both it Worked on Mort and Julien but it Failed to trick Maurice. The effect on humans is unknown
Hound Hunter(street smarts): Detects nearby dogs. We attempted to use it to save Mort from an overexcitable K-9 called elmer.
Success/failure: Failure
Hovercraft Headrest(Feline fervor): Floats in the air with turbines on the bottom and can move in different directions. I used it to search for Julian after he was mistaken for a cat and brought to someone's house.
Success/failure: Success
I
Ice Ray(P.E.L.T): Encases what it hits in ice. To freeze Marlene's overflowing pool so I could drain it.
Success/failure: Success
InfraRed herring toaster (invention intervention): toasts herring using a powerful light-wave
Success/failure: failure as it blew up and caused Skipper to set up a no envelope pushing policy
Intelligence Intensifying Incubation Chamber(Paternal Egg-Stinct): An attempt to increase the intelligence of the still unhatched eggy. Private of course took the full blunt of the device.
Success/failure: Success as I managed to increase Private's intelligence for a few seconds (he correctly guessed the square root of pie).
Invention, the (I Know Why the Caged Bird Goes Insane): As a result of going crazy for not being able to go to invexbo due to my injuries. It didn't do much except scare Private off.
Success/Failure: As it didn't actually do anything it wasn't a success or a failure.
Ion Cannon:(Read The Third DreamWorks War: The Return of Drago) A weapon that uses energized ions to reduce objects into nothing. I used it on the dragon drago was riding (he was not happy about that). Strangely I never used it again just as an intimatation factor. This destroys the need for a ion cannon setting for the EMP cannon. It came out again during The Fall:The Defeat but I don't recall if I used it then either…
Success/Failure: Success
J-K
Jiggli (Jiggles,The trouble with Jiggles): Not exactly an invention but I including him anyway. Jiggles was actually created by accident when I was trying to create something else. It feed only on fruit but Skipper and the others grow increasingly worried as it slowly grew to the size of a party like a rockstar partybus. We tried to trap it using coconut scented sunscreen but Julian ended up wasting the entire can and got eaten. In hindsight calling the team "Science haters" was not the best thing I could have done in the moment. Assuming that Jiggles and I had an understanding I secreted him away in zoo storage. Sadly I ended up with Julian inside the creature…with the help of a fish Julian and I managed to escaped. Skipper and the rest of the team show up and only after I apologized for the haters remark help me contain the creature. With the help of a shrink ray I srunk jiggles back to a more manageable size but to the rest of the team it appeared like I destroyed it. I rearranged the DNA to prevent it from growing to massive size and to feed only on wiped cream. Skipper of course found me and brought down a bat to it. Due to the RNA of Jiggles the creature divided and turned into two Jiggli. Our usual technic of attack almost ended the world. I had ruled out us leaving the planet but not the jiggli leaving the planet. We sent them to Mars giving the Space Squids a real surprise.
Success/failure: The jiggli successful colonized Mars and probably wiped out the space squids. Hopefully the ice warriors that also inhabiat mars don't take this as a declaration of war. Recently a lone Jiggles returned to earth via a meteor (read A Very Penguin October: Jiggles Returns to learn the details).
Jet-packs (Penguiner takes all, Dr. Blowholes revenge, in the line of dooty): Self-explainatory…Packs that allow you to fly. The original jet-packs were built as pay-back for all of julians capture the flag antics. The packs allows us to win that round of capture the flag, all of our stuff, and everything the lemurs owned (a crown, a bounce house, fans, a beach chair, and mort). The second time we used them was to break into Blowhole's secret base in style. I built a special one with weapons and highly unstable turbos to help Skipper take down a pigeion named Frankie. Success/failure: Success despite the fact that the advanced one had highly unstable turbos
Kinetic Energy Spray(Can't touch this): Creates a barrier coating around the wearer. Was suppose to protect Randy the sheep from the sticky hands of the children at the petting zoo. Success/failure: Failure as it made Randy bounce around Penguin HQ.
L
Lemur Locator 5000 (Penguins of Madagascar Nintendo DS): A device that can locate the position of a lemur. Was created after mort went missing looking for mangoes(after he mistaken shoes for the feet) in order to locate mort. At first it found Julian and Maurice. Julian for his part snarkly commented that I should have created a "mango locator 5000" instead. Once I expand the search grid and overridded julian and maurice's presence we located mort in the city. Afte searching for several hours in the city we located mort and brought him home.
Success/failure: success. Managed to successfully locate three lemurs.
Love potion 47(Monkey love): An attempt to make Phil attractive to Lulu a chimp who was staying in the zoo while her habitat back in Hoboken was being repaired. As it was made with flamingo sweat it made phil attractive…only to the wrong species.
Success/failure: Success except it attracted the wrong species of female to Phil
Love-u-laser (loath at first sight): An attempt to make Doris love me. It worked with Alice and a trash-can too bad it failed and caused the entire Zoo to loath me. I almost got killed by the entire zoo but by throwing it into the fountain causing it to short-circuit I managed to save myself. Success/failure: Failure as it caused the entire zoo to hate me. Success as Alice was in love with that trash-can for a while.
Love-u-lator 3000 (otter things have happened): Meant to find Marlene's true love which happened to be outside the zoo. (This was before the littlefoot adventure that cured marlene of her wild side) We assumed it was Fred but it turned out to be a male otter named Antonio. Back to the drawing board.
Success/failure: Failure due to personal error
M-N
Mind-switching device(roger dodger,high moltage,King me): When Roger got kicked out of his sewer home by the rats we switched his mind with Rico. Rico defeated the Rats but then went on a rampage. We managed to stop Rico and return Roger and Rico to their proper bodies. Later we tried to used the machine to help Julian defeat Clemson in an old lemur tradition. Sadly, Clemson caught on to the plan and sabatogized the competition in order to win Julian's crown. Of course we swapped out the real crown for the mind-switching machine. Julian in Clemson's body crowned Clemson(in julian body). We switched Julian and Clemson back and Clemson left in shame. As for what happened in High moltage trust me you do not want to know unless you watched the episode.
Success/Failure: failure as it blow up later a success.
Nanites, the (byte sized): Designed with programming to prevent any harm to any Penguin. They were pretty helpful and make great smoothies. That was until we tried to rescue barry the frog and the programming worked a bit too well. It was made worst by the fact I didn't install verbal override(wanted to but didn't). The mini robots even locked us up in our own base as part of "containment". I invented a plunger gun (see Electro-Pulse Cannon) that fired a electric blast that fried a Nanite controlled appliance. Skipper took the gun and went nanite hunting only to be met by a gaint nanite robot. The Robot was only stopped when it fell on top of me thus violating it's own programming. The Nanites self-terminated and were destroyed. I kept some of the dormant nanites so I could study what went wrong at a later date. They escaped at that later date and took over some empty Dalek-casings(read A very Penguin October: Revenge of the Nanites). A EMP cannon took care of that. Eventually they even teamed up with the actually Daleks (Read Penguin Days of summer: Revenge of the Nanite-daleks). I used modified Nanites to crush the daleks and their ships with their own shields(Read The Fall: The Defeat).
Success/failure: Success but their programming backfired causing them to become over-zealous in their penguin protection protocols.
Nanite-Crusher Attachment NCA: (Read Penguins Days of Summer: Revenge of the Nanite-Daleks, The Third DreamWorks War: Monsters vs. Daleks rematch, and The Final DreamWorks War: Monsters Vs. Daleks III) an attachment to the EMP cannon that destroys Nanites and interferes with Dalek shields and other dalek systems. Later during the Third DreamWorks War it got destroyed because I forgot to set the EMP cannon to attachment mode. Later for convenience I rechristened it the NCA and redesigned it as an attachment for the Dalek-Slayer. This proved helpful when the Dalek's Death Beam releashed an EMP knocking out our weapons. I knocked down the Dalek's shields, destroyed them, and then The Death Beam and the aptly named Death Ship (again).
Success/failure: Success, was later redesigned for use with the Dalek-Slayer.
Neural-Nutralizer and Spectral-Demagnetizer (driven to the brink): Two weapons upgrades for the car I labeled them but as I can't read I can't tell which is which.
Success/Failure: Unknown until I install them.
Next-o-skeleton (arch enemy): The next generation of exosuits with an array of weapons. I had planned to make it self aware.
Success/failure: Success even though a vengeful snail(Yes you heard that right) used it to have his revenge on me when he learned that it was I who smashed him and not Private.
Nuclear Powered Bagel Toaster(brain drain): Not sure if this really was a good idea but uses Nuclear power to toast bagels
Success/Failure: Success
Nuclear Reactor(Madagascar 3): to increase the speed of the LARV in order to get rid of DuBois. Runs on a uranium 239 blanket.
Success/failure: Success even though it almost crashed the vehicle. (Alex: Almost?) Okay it did crash the vehicle.
Number twelve(All chocked up) : Skipper made me whip up this nasty mixture after Rico was given anti-barf medicine and became unable to hack up a bomb. It's ingredients as of follows; 2 scoops of squirrel lint, A dash of baboon spit, Used kitty litter, 1 hippo toenail, Anything found in the monkey cages. Rico actually enjoyed it at first...his stomach disagreed with him. He barfed up the mixture but he did not throw up the bomb. Sending Mort down to the bottom of the stomach failed as well (As he is probably color blind or because he is so dumb). Crying about losing Rico is what ultimately lead to him throwing up the bomb (because of his gooey-love mush sensitivety).
Success/failure: Failure as it did not make Rico throw up the bomb.
Number One Fan, The(The Penguins of Madagascar Nintendo D.S): A giant fan that was meant to blow all the snow back to the north pole in order to realign the earth's axis. This was invented after our drilling rig (see Professor Drilly) tilted the earth on it axis thus moving the north pole to new york. This resulted in a snow pack and polar conditions. Unfortantly we had to sneak past julian and a angry mob that mistakenly thought we planned to blow up the zoo in order to activate the device. After we explain what we were really doing we managed to blow all the snow back to the north pole.
Success/failure: success realigning the earth to it's proper axial alignment
O
Omni-view: Enables the user to observe a battle without actually being in the firing range
Success/failure: Success, altought it ended up in enemy hands (read A Very Penguin October: Operation Sub-Zero or The Second DreamWorks War: battles of Berk)
Orbital Death Ray(Huffin and Puffin): It destroys things one of the things that Hans eyed when he took over the base.
Success/failure: No idea never tested it.
P
Pain Elimination Helmet(sting operation): An attempt to eliminate pain so we could defeat the hornets.
Success/failure: failure
Professor Drilly(The Penguins of Madagascar Nintendo D.S):The zoo reduced the amount of fish we were given at feeding time. Skipper decided to go into the sewers and drill into the zoo storage facility to prevent us starving. I created this heavy duty drilling device and used it to tunnel upwards. Unfortantly the drill was so powerful that it tilted earth off it's axis. This moved the North Pole to manhatten. Until I managed to figure this out we wandered the zoo thinking we were at the actual North Pole. We managed to correct the issue with a giant fan that blow the snow back to the north pole (see Number one fan, the).
Success/failure: Success it did as it was designed which was tunneling. Also a success at tilting the earth off it's axis.
Paranormal Detector (read Earth's Darkest Day Part One: Secrets of Africa): If anything out of the ordinary or supernatural happens in or around the city we will know. Things like time-traveling dinosaurs, Dalek invasions, Cyber-attacks, TARDISes, Magical beings, Mutations, Godzilla, King Kong, Dr. Blowhole acting non-evil, ect.
Success/failure: success
Penguin Planet Orbiting Headquarters Space Station AKA Orbiting HQ: (Read Penguin Days of Summer: Here Comes The Daleks) a space station that would have allowed us to fight off alien invaders before they could inflict damage to the planet below. Has a module for us, the ISPA, a biodome, a module built to the North Wind's specifications, and a hanger. The station revolves on an angle just like Earth at a constant motion thus the station produces it's own gravitational field that keeps its inhabitants from floating around. I still installed resistance machines though to prevent bone loss(Just in case the artificial gravity fails). it was amazing until the Daleks showed up and imploded it.
Success/failure: Success, even thought it got destroyed by the Daleks.
Penguin One, The (Launch Time, Big Blue marble, Operation Swapaneze): Rocket that was suppose to enable us to vaction on what Skipper decribes as a lemur free environment The Moon. As I forgot to carry the two we ended up on the rooftop that Max (or as we called him Mooncat) called home. After crashlanding to Earth we learned off this fact and quickly attacked the lemurs for stealing our TV. We rebuilt the penguin one and after the soft-nose fighters failed, Skipper rescued us with it during operation: big blue marble. The big blue marble ended up being destroyed and the Rocket landing perfectly this time. The most recent mission involving the Penguin One was a rescue operation after a plan to show that Penguins can travel into space went south when we learned that Private would be up there for a long time. We finally made it to the Moon and rescued Private but I forgot to carry the two a second time and we ended up on Mars. We didn't see any jiggli or Lemmy but we did see one angry (we assume) space squid. Success/failure: Intitally a failure now a success.
Penguinfication Gun/penguinfier (read Twelve Days of Daleks: Time of the Daleks and The Day of the Penguins, mentioned in Penguin New Year): After we defeated the Daleks on Christmas day we used it in order for Jack Frost, Elsa, and Anna to join in on our holiday celebrations. On New Year's eve nobody was on board to be penguinfied as they had their own new years plans. When the Daleks Dalekfied Private on The Day of The Penguins we devised a plan to use it to reverse the effect. After we separated Dalek-Private from the rest of the daleks with help from the cyber-men we turned Private back into a penguin. Then lead to the epicest battle with the daleks followed by the most epic adventure we had in our lifetimes…and their will never be another day like it.
success/failure: success
Penguin Robots (Dr. Blowholes returns again): Robots I created to fool Zookeeper alice while we were away at missions. And also to do some cleaning tasks for us around the base. They were created after operation: badger drop failed due to alice's watchful gaze. Sadly as soon as the robot activated they quickly went on a rampage. In order to stop them we had to track them down and each of us had to take on our robotic twin in single combat. Once we defeated them and returned to base I tried to figure out what went wrong. We later learned that they went haywire due to blowhole's interference.
Success/failure: failure due to outside villainous interference.
Plasma cutter(Roomies): A device that can cut thru almost anything (except diamonds). At first I had no idea what it did until Marlene used it to help us rescue a walrus(which she hated) from ending up in a polar bear preserve. Sadly Skipper parania proved to be right as the walrus turned out to be a spy sent by blowhole to steal my latest invention.
Success/failure: success too bad it's probably in Blowhole's flippers by now. Or is it as his island base blew up (of course there's still the submarine base and the one under coney island).
Plasma blaster(wishful thinking): With repeating action and laser sights. In an alternate timeline I got it after wishing for it in a magic fountain. In this timeline I invented it. I tried field testing it during a Dalek invasion (don't believe me read Operation Dalek part one) but it failed.
Success/failure: failure as Daleks seem immuned to plasma
Pocket Hyperbolic Quantum Accelerator(brush with danger): It was only a plan a really big plan it would either save mankind or destroy it. I decided to destroy the plans but it got ripped out of my flippers by a helicopter and mistaken as art by a art critic. We decided to break into the museum and destroy the plans before a mad genius (like blowhole) discovered the plans. By replacing one of the symbols with a Lunacorn we made the plans completely useless. Of course the art critic didn't think the Lunacorn was very creative.
Success/failure: Failure as I will never actually built it. It was also a failure as a piece of art (everyone's a critic).
Portal Closer/Opener: (Read Penguins days of summer: wrath of Egypt and Across the Multiverse Saga) In addition to the transdimesional vacumm I added a Portal Closer attachment to the super-plane. The purpose was so we could close the portal all the sand was coming from so it didn't dump any more sand on our world. It can open or close any portal except when there's supernatural intervention. When portals opened throughout the galaxy we hooked it up to the North Wind's space jet in order to stop a multiverse spanning disaster. I built a somewhat crude handheld version when we got trapped in an alternate universe. The handheld version opened a portal so we could return to The North Wind so we could return to our universe.
Success/failure: Success
Positronic Tougue Cleaner(brain drain): Cleans tongues
Success/failure: success
Power Cell(Blowhole strike back): A powerfully experimentally power cell that is NOT a battery. Julian as a result of dead batteries in his MP3 player wanted this despite the warning that it could take out the entire eastern seaboard. Despite Maurice warning that stealing from the penguin is extra bad on top of bad Julian snuck down to where I was storing the cell anyway. Julian return to the main floor the elevator knocking us out of the way of the diaboligizer and turning his MP3 into a monster. We managed to defeat blowhole and stop the mutant player by extracting the power-cell. Success/failure: success even thought it ended up being used for evil.
Persona Disentanglizer(little foot): Contains one's unwanted impulses. Build to contain Marlene's feral impulses, thus allowing her to exit the zoo so she could go to a concert.
Success/failure: Success until Marlene's feral half escaped. Resulting in us dealing with Officer X AGAIN…
Project S.T.A.N.K. AKA Super Toxic Aromatically Noxious Ka-Boom-Boom (The big STANK): Designed to lock onto a target and hold it there until the odor core detonated. Julian thinking it was a new throne sabotaged our mission to move it to a save distance. We got it to Hoboken but we couldn't remove Julian from it. All it took to save Julian was one small manly tear from Skipper (Julian thinks otherwise). When it went off it actually improved the air quality over in Hoboken
Success/failure: Failure in it's original purpose to trap Blowhole. (Dolphin's don't use toilets apparently)
Psychotron(when the chips are down): Device that can read minds so one could know what people are thinking. Unfortantly I was unable to find a decent circuitboard so regretfully I stole one from mort's electronic friend. By the time we found a replacement game for mort...he discovered the cell phone.
Success/Failure: A regretful success.
R
Radar/arieal camera controller/evil energy reader(Go fish, The Hidden, Blowhole Strikes Back): My multi-use tool that allows me to remote control an arieal camera, use radar, and get a reading on how evil something is.
Success/failure: success
Refresherier/Refresherator/youth ray(Rock-a-bye birdie): Gun that returns food to a fresh state. Too bad it turned Skipper into a baby and got into the hands of the Rats. Skipper even in baby form managed to defeat the Rat King and company. We eventually got Skipper back to normal (it took longer to convince Julian that there was never a petey). Success/failure: Success
Romp womper, the (Gut instinct): Device meant to punish someone for a crime by spanking them. When we defeated Hans after he locked down and took over the zoo we attempted to use it to punish him. Unfortantly it somehow exploded and Hans won the day after all. (read The Fall: The Defeat). After a decidedly terrible prank Julian got punished by the romp romper after all(read Prelude: Night of the Penguins)
Success/failure: Success managing to punish everyone (even Burt how he fit in their I have no idea)
Reverse Engineered Sonic Screwdriver: (Read Thre Third DreamWorks War: The Battle of New York) I managed to successfully reverse engineer The Doctor's Sonic Screwdriver. I started working on this project secretly between missions sometime after our first encounter with the Daleks (Operation Dalek: Parts one and two). I used it for the first time towards the end of the Third DreamWorks War to free Marlene from the clutches of Pitch Black. I haven't used it since then.
Success/Failure: Success (But I'll leave sonic devices to The Doctor)
Revovler, The: (Read Thankgiving of doom): I built this to reverse the effects of Blowhole's evolution reverse. I use it to turn private back to normal after Blowhole devolved private into a T-Rex.
Success/failure: Success.
S
Satellite Over-Ride Remote Control Unit(Zoo tube): Can over-ride a satellite and send a signal in so it can be broadcasted. Was supposed to boardcast a commercial (that julian highjacked) to save the zoo.
Success/failure: Success as Julian blowing it up interefered with the boardcast of the dumb animal channel(DAC).
Self-destruct Mechanism(fit to print): Can destroy Penguin HQ if we were ever found out, so our secrets wouldn't fall into the wrong hands.
Success/failure: Success (we had to rebuild the base)
Self upgrading Cyber-gun: (Read a Very Penguin December Cyber-men in the Snow) Weapon designed to get around the Cyber-men upgrading by upgrading to the Cyber-men upgrades. The Weapon reacts and adapts to The Cyber-men programming patches. Unless they make an upgrade that allows them to upgrade faster the the Cyber-gun could react.
Success/failure: Success until the Cybermen figure it out.
Shrinky shrinker ray(The big jam, jiggles, all choked up): turns out I was wrong about a shrink ray taking 712 years to prefect. A jam (thanks to burt) caused several animals to get stuck in the secret exit out of the zoo. It worked only instead of shrinking Burt…it shrank me. After reversing it I ended up getting big, then going back to being tiny, then got too big again, then got too fat, then when back to my normal size but with pokadots. Then I ended up back to being small, right before the water pressure (thanks to julian opening the water main) increased to a point where the water could dislodge Burt. I stayed small for a while until I figured it out.
Success/failure: an embarrassing success.
Six foot whacking stick (untouchable): A secret project I was working on. Skipper tried to use it to defeat barry the poison dart frog.
Success/failure: Success until Skipper fell victim to Barry's toxic touch.
Sleeping gas(truth ache): Gas that makes a person fall asleep. Stored in a jam jar.
Success/failure: success.
Smartphone(thumb drive, The Penguin who loved me): Can hack into anything like zoo storage buildings and Seaville aqua fun-parks. Annoyingly that smug duck-face Parker the platypus stole it. I managed to steal it back and hacked into the U.S server in order to give The Red Squirrel a massive headache(read The Day of the Penguins). During a mission to rescue Skipper from PIA(puffin intelligence Agency) and Denmark I used it to stop a nuke that the puffin's launched. With the threat of me "returning to sender" (which I would never actually carry out) they released Skipper and fled in defeat (Read Skipper: Denmark one shot).
Success/failure: Success
Snow cone machine(It's About Time): Private commissioned me to build it after the failure of the crono-o-tron. Sadly it trapped New York under a favored snow pack. It took months to clear all that out.
Success/failure: although it ended in disaster those were some good snow-cones.
Snow-o-matic 5000 (Read A very penguin Christmas: Operation Snow day): A device that can create a snow storm at will. It had many modes including winter wonderland, polar vortex, Antarctica, Pluto, and absolute zero. It was meant to give Julian a snow day in order to celebrate the last day of julianury. Sadly Julian believed that the device itself was his gift. After attempts to ask nicely, bribe us, and blackmail us failed Julian just snuck in and stole it. Julian then messed with the controls making it colder and colder. We tried multiple times to steal it back each time being met with a random wind storm or Julian's hired thugs. Julian messing around eventually resulted in Ice age conditions made worst when it set it to Pluto. Luckily thanks to a daring jump by yours truly I managed to reset everything. Once the disaster was over I deconstructed the device, mainly to keep Julian from misusing it again. But we did use it one last time setting it to winter wonderland so Julian could get some enjoyment out of it.
Success/failure: Too successful…especially after Julian got his paws on it.
Soft-nosed fighters (Big blue marble): they look like little jets but they are designed for space travel. The first attempt to destroy the Big blue marble
Success/failure: Failure, Skipper had to rescue us with the Penguin One as a result.
Sonic Sub-Particle Velocitizer (King Julian for a day): velocitizes sound-waves to move objects like a tractor beam. Largely untested…and is not a toy!
Success/failure: success even though Julian was using it
Space-Time communicator: Communicates thru-out time and space. Very helpful when we need to ask Elsa or any of our allies for help with something we can't handle alone. Success/failure: Success except when Blowhole blocked them(Villainmageddon part one: Blowhole and Company)
Space-time Teleport: Developed despite having inferior and/or salvaged equipment in The Kingdom of Arendelle. Queen Elsa was given one as thank you for letting us help her stop Blowhole. I built another one so we could actually help Elsa if a something from our world threatens her's. It can teleport us anywhere in time and space (not a smooth as the TARDIS but Elsa prefers the space-time teleport). It has aided us in many of our time-traveling escapades that don't involve a TARDIS or if somehow we got separated from the Doctor's time-ship. I recently added a insta-teleport function that is much more reliable then before. I am considering adding a timer function and a calling device. Sometimes we refer to it as the Time-space teleport or simply The Teleport.
Success/failure: sometimes its a success but it is prone to get shut down due to outside interference or low charge. (a prime example of this is A very Penguin December: Revenge of the Polar bears, Villainmageddon part one: Blowhole and Company, and A very Penguin December: City of the Penguins)
spectral energy detector(Operation: Lunacorn apocalypse, also read A Very Penguin October: ghost in the TARDIS, and The Day of the Penguins): A device that detects the varying amounts of spectral energy created from the actives of ghosts, phantoms, malevolent spirits, and anything else from the spirit world/underworld/afterlife. It was helpful During a mission to find the sword of general shinjin in the hall of accursive artifacts. Unfortunately it failed to detect an evil spirit called Kuchinkukan the destroyer of worlds that wanted to possess Private. Of course it ended up possessing private's lunacorn which resulted in us battling a pink pony (that is in no way meant to sound manly). We ultimately with help from Shinjin and Private's knowledge of Lunacorn (Skipper: which he blabbed most of to the enemy!) we managed to defeat Kuchinkukan again. I later added a EVP (look it up) mode and discover that the spectral energy detector can also detect disembodied minds like The Great Intelligence as well as its whisper-men minions. All ghosts are disembodied minds but not all disembodied minds are ghosts. During the Day of Penguins we encountered a camouflaged Indomius Rex. Skipper thought it was some sort of ghost dino but I detected no spectral energy. We were stumped until the Indomius Rex revealed it self… What is an indomius Rex? A Monster…A tyrant that must be killed...No matter what IT says about itself…
success/failure: a ghostly success…But don't worry…I'm ain't afraid of no ghosts!
Steel Penguin suit (Untouchable, danger wears a cape, siege the day, time out, big blue marble): Originally built by Private to allow him to touch barry without falling victim to the frog's toxic touch. After we had the idea to become super-heroes Private updated it so he could become Steel Penguin. Another time Private used it to try and defeat both the Rats and the Hornets. Of course the hornets managed to destroy the suit with their stingers. We had Private fired from high in the atmosphere in the suit to test the Stop-watch. During what we now call Operation big blue marble we attached rockets to Private's suit to do some Space recon.
Success/Failure: A super-hero Success
Subatomic Nail Trimmer(brain drain): trims nails
Success/failure: success
Sub mach 1(Snakehead): The original Sub built to hunt down the snakehead. Equipped with weapons, sonar, and maps. Got destroyed after a head on collision with the snakehead.
Success/failure: Failure as it was destroyed
Sub mach 2(Operation Antarctica, herring impared): rebuilt with better weapons (cough…torpedos…cough).Was originally rebuilt for a salvage mission in the lower new york bay for 100-year old herring. We later used it to go after Private when he ran off to try and get a young leopard seal back to Antarctica. Destroyed after a run in with some leopard seals.
Success/failure: Success until Julian swapped out the torpedoes for fruit.
Sub mach 3(The Penguin Who loved me): We used it to break into Seaville aqua funpark. We later used it to find Blowhole's island base (which was destroyed).
Success/Failure: Success as we still have it
Sub-Zero Cannon: Fires a blast of ice that is at absolute Zero and freeze everything (including Ice).
Success/Failure: Failed the first time but was a success every other time (Read Operation Sub-zero, A Very Penguin December: The Frozen Earth, and Penguins Day of Summer: Night of the reptiles). After a skirmish with Savio, an army of Komodo Dragons, and their king it was decided that a weapon of immese powers such as this one should never be used again.
Super-ray(Mort Unbound): I designed it to make Super-fish to give the team more energy. It worked brilliantly…except it zapped Mort instead turning the small lemur into a big buff lemur. We managed to get big mort to drink the antidote but only after Private got zapped by ray. Sadly, Big Private didn't want to drink the antidote either…but that's another story.
Success/failure: Success but now it's locked in secret level 13 while I figure out a way to keep unwanted test subjects out of it.
Super-ray antidote(mort unbound): Meant to undo the effects of the super-ray. Making this antidote was the easy part (it just needed sugar) getting mort to drink it not so much.
Success/failure: Success but only after Private got zapped by the super-ray and forced Mort to drink the antidote.
T
Thermo-Fusion Reactor (Mr. Tux): Powers Penguin HQ or anything really. Not as powerful as the anti-matter fusion reactor core.
Success/failure: Success until the Amarillo Kid sets it to Self-Destruct
Thermo-Nuclear Sardine Tin(marble jarhead): Blows up everything in a 5 mile radius.
Success/failure: failure as it blew up but didn't destroy anything
Tran-dimensional toothbrush(Time Out): Thoroughly brushes one's teeth without holding it. Even thought I have a fear of the dentist and the fact that penguins don't have teeth I invented this because…The Stop-watch gave me the time to invent it. And also because it can operate itself while sticking out a portal.
Success/failure: Success but it doesn't work when time isn't stopped for some reason.
Transdimesional Vacuum: (Read Penguin days of summer: wrath of Egypt) built after a freak sandstorm buried New York and several other major cities in several feet of sand. The Sand of course came from a portal leading to another dimension that was nothing but desert. Basically I upgraded a normal vacuum so we could send the sand back to the dimension it came from.
Success/failure: Success
Transmatterer OR transparent matter maker(Invention intervention): I design it to make objects invisible (invisibility ray was taken) the only problems were Skipper put in place a no envelope pushing policy, a certain dumb squirrel, and a even dumber King Julian. Private and I tried to sneak out to stop the rouge transmatterer from it's make objects invisible rampage. Skipper caught us but instantly blamed Blowhole for the Transmatter. We proceed to ram the transmatterer with a city bus but that only caused an overload. I managed to shut it down and prevent everything from becoming invisible. I then tried to explain the truth to Skipper but I kept getting interrupted.
Success/failure: Success but much to my dismay all the credit goes to Blowhole.
truth Serum (truth ache): Serum that make people tell the truth…duh. If someone is holding information from the penguins, this will get it out of them. Though for some reason I can't remember much about the last time I used it. I usually keep it in a hot sauce bottle. Success/failure: Success...I think
Tunneler, the (Best Laid Plantains): designed to dig into the ground to reach the kingdom of the mole men
Success/Failure: Failure
Turbo-toes(gut instinct): enables the wearer to jump higher then usual. Invented so I could show off so as to impress Gladys.(our supplier of food not on our "special diets"…take that Do not feed the animal policy!)
Success/failure: Success (even thought it resulted in a chain of events that lead to human injury).
U-V
Ultrasonic Earwax Recycler(brain drain): recycles Earwax
Success/failure: failure until I convert it to metric
Unexpected Event Meter (cradle and all): Designed to detect the unexpected of course Private endangering a baby was so unexpected that it exploded. Despite the prediction of massive disaster (us getting blown sky-high might count as the massive disaster) we managed to get the baby safely back to his father. The only thing that got destroyed was the baby carriage. I can safety say none of us want to change a diaper anytime soon.
Success/failure: failure as it blew up
Void cannon, The: (read The Fall: The defeat) A cannon that fires void stuff at a target in order to trap them in the void. I used it to hopefully trap pitch black forever (even though he escaped the void twice already).
Success/failure: I'll get back to you on that…
Z
Zero-grav gun(Operation Swapaneze): creates a zero-gravity zone in a small area. Used as part of a space-worthness contest to see if any of us could survive the dangers of space.
Success/failure: Success even though Rico got zero-gravity sickness.
-Well that's all for now people, These are all the inventions I want to talk about. The others are either to awesome for your minds to handle or too embarrassing for me to talk about. I assure as long as Skipper allows me to work in my lab I will continue to invent things. No matter how embarrassing or disastrous. Some may work, some may fail, and most of them will threaten to destroy us all but when in doubt...keep inventing. One day I may create something that works so brilliantly that I may become the world's greatest Penguin scientist. Either that or invent something that fails so badly that life on Earth become difficult if not impossible. Their a 90% percent chance of massive flaming disaster. And the other 5% well…I invent something beyond my current imagination. More inventions may join my all-time favorite list others may join my I rather forget list.
Your Science expert,
Kowalski
