Broken Dreams
By Jaye Reid.
Written: 13 – 16.11.1999
Disclaimer: "Dear Santa… Hal. has been a naughty boy and won't share his toys. I have been a good girl and I don't want new toys…. I just want the ones that Hal. doesn't play with anymore. See I'm not greedy like he is! Love Jaye"
Authors notes: Be warned. Go and get a big box of tissues before you start this one… I wrote it and I still get chills re reading it…
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Gavin sat by a table alone at the Cutters Bar. He wanted to be left alone. The rest of the Office was there, and the dive crew; but they knew better than to approach him.
~*~*~*~
It had all started out as a normal day. Nothing too dramatic seemed to be happening out on the Harbour.
Then the call came.
"VKG to Police Launch Nemesis."
Tommy grabbed the radio.
"Receiving VKG."
"Nemesis, what is your ten – twenty?"
"Ah, we are just rounding the marker off Pier three," he replied.
"Roger that Nemesis, your assistance may be required. One of Pol-air's units is experiencing difficulty and may have to ditch, please stand by."
"Roger, standing by."
With the mention of Pol-air, Gavin's ears pricked up, and he moved into the cabin to listen to the radio. Tommy knew what Gavin was thinking. He was thinking the same thing too. Would it just be Tayler's luck?
"I mean Gavin, how many do Pol-air have in the sky?" said Tommy trying to sound optimistic.
"Not enough," was all Gavin said.
They waited for what seemed like an eternity. Then the radio came to life.
"VKG to Nemesis. Affirmative on the last. I repeat affirmative. We have an emergency with Pol-air 397. They are trying to set a course for Sector 14. Please acknowledge Nemesis."
Gavin took the mic. as Tommy opened the throttle and powered towards the proposed ditching site.
"Roger VKG, Nemesis E.T.A from site approximately four minutes."
"Sector 14," said Tommy knowingly to Gavin.
"Yeah," he replied. "If you had to put a chopper down, that would be the best place to do it. Tayler knows these waters, it has to be her on board doesn't it? I mean….. she would just know that would be the best place…"
"Yep. I was thinking that myself," he replied, trying to stay calm for both their sakes as he sped along.
Another call came through on the radio.
"VKG to all water units. Pol-air 397 is down, I repeat Pol-air 397 is in the water. All units we have an emergency situation. This is not a drill, I repeat this is not a drill."
Gavin grabbed the mic. as they rounded the last bend.
"VKG this is Nemesis, we are almost at the site, I repeat almost at the ……. SHIT!"
Gavin dropped the mic.
"VKG to Nemesis, do you read. Please acknowledge."
Tommy eased back on the throttle. He looked at Gavin. "Come on Syksie, answer it. Come on! Calm and focussed, calm and focussed."
"Yeah," Gavin repeated, "Calm and focussed…"
Gavin picked up the mic. dangling from its cord.
"VKG this is Police Launch Nemesis, we are at the scene."
"Roger Nemesis, can we have a visual report?"
"Roger VKG, ah….. hell. Advise units to approach with caution. I repeat CAUTION. She must have hit pretty hard. There is wreckage everywhere."
"Roger Nemesis, will advise."
"Shit, shit, shit," Tommy muttered to himself; where to start.
"God mate," said Gavin, "where do we start? If anyone survived this….."
"Come on, I know. Remember calm and focussed," Tommy replied. "Let's just focus on doing our jobs. We don't even know that Tayler was on this one."
Tommy manoeuvred the Nemesis through the mess. He noticed a large fuel slick starting to form a skin on the surface of the water. One spark and they would all be history. He quickly shut the engines down.
Silence.
"Look!" yelled Gavin, "someone in the water!"
As Gavin kicked off his shoes and dived into the water, Tommy reached for the radio to notify VKG of the fuel spill.
Gavin swam over towards the floating body. The water was so cold. He grabbed hold of the Officer and pulled them back to the boat.
"Tommy! Shit! Come and give he a hand!" Gavin called.
Between the two of them, they quickly had him on the deck.
He was barely breathing. Blood gushing from a stomach wound as well as a head wound. They tried to apply pressure to both to reduce the flow of blood. It wasn't working.
"Hang in there mate, stay with us, okay? You'll be fine," said Tommy.
He was drifting, his words barely coherent.
"The others?" he barely whispered. "Are they…?"
"Hey, haven't found them yet. But we will," said Tommy.
Gavin saw his opportunity.
"Johnson, Tayler Johnson? Was she part of the crew?"
He was drifting in and out of consciousness now, "Johnson?" he mumbled.
"Yeah," said Gavin.
"Red…? Yeah, new one… she's there… somewhere…." He slipped back into unconsciousness.
And then he was gone.
"Christ!" exclaimed Gavin as he stood up and surveyed the mess. "Where is she? And where the friggin' hell is everyone else!"
"They'll be here soon, okay. Look mate," said Tommy trying to stay calm. Losing it wasn't going to help anyone. "I don't think there is much we can do until we get some more help here."
"Bullshit! I'm going back in…"
"No! Gavin…. There's fuel everywhere. You can't…."
"Nah," said Gavin shaking his head and moving to the edge, "She's in there somewhere, I HAVE to find her…"
Gavin disappeared back over the side of the boat, leaving Tommy standing there. He looked down at the dead Officer.
Gavin was right, he thought. Where the hell was everyone? The two of them couldn't achieve much. Shit, Tayler had only been gone three weeks, they hadn't even found a replacement for her on the Nemesis yet. Not that three people out there amongst this chaos would have been any better.
Tommy went back to the radio.
"Police Launch Nemesis to VKG, do you copy?"
"Copy Nemesis."
"Where the hell is everyone else….. we have a major emergency here. One Officer deceased, do we have details of how many were on board?"
"Roger Nemesis. Emergency services should almost be at your twenty. Confirmed Pilot and two Officers on board."
"Roger VKG."
Tommy went back out on deck. He couldn't see Gavin. Christ they didn't need another fatality.
Then Gavin appeared from under the surface. Tommy knew it was hopeless. Gavin probably did too. There was just too much debris to find anything.
But Gavin continued to search.
Tommy climbed up to the highest point that he could on the Nemesis, hoping that from that vantage point he might see something, anything. But no, nothing. The silence was only broken by Gavin calling out Taylers name. There was little movement other than Gavin diving under the water and then surfacing; or the waves tossing pieces of the helicopter around like paper in the wind.
Gavin was still frantically searching through the wreckage for a sign, any sign that Tayler was there, alive.
Emergency services arrived and joined in the search. The dive crew arrived, eventually having to pull Gavin exhausted from the water. He had refused to stop searching.
They took Gavin to the hospital, he wasn't in a healthy state. Shock, exhaustion and swimming amongst the waves of spilt fuel had taken their toll. He refused to stay there though. He wanted to get back to the Office. He wanted to be there when word came through. His heart wishing her to be alive, but his head knowing the truth.
Gavin and Helen sat together in Jeff's office, waiting.
Their faces mirroring the same blank disbelieving expression.
"We were going to the movies tonight," said Gavin out of the silence.
"Huh, what?" asked Helen. She had been thinking about the last conversation she had with Tayler earlier in the week. How excited Tayler had been about her new adventure.
"Me and Tayler….. we had a date for tonight, movies."
"Oh," replied Helen, "we were meant to be… shopping… this weekend..."
Jeff walked into the room. His face ashened.
Gavin stood up and faced him. "Have they…."
Jeff nodded.
"And…..?" he could barely bring himself to ask.
Jeff shook his head. "No,….. I'm sorry. It was too late."
Helen burst into tears.
"Oh God this is so unfair!" she cried.
Gavin put his arm around Helen's shoulders. The grief flowing through his body, covering him like a black cloud. A silent tear cascading down his cheek, and then another and another…..
"I hate to ask," said Jeff, "but they need formal identification. Is there anyone who…"
"I'll go," said Gavin looking up at Jeff.
It really should be family. Helen is there anyone I can call…." Started Jeff.
"No," said Helen looking at Gavin's broken face, "Tayler and Gavin were…." Helen was searching for the right word. Tayler had told her about the relationship that had really started to blossom in the three weeks since she had left.
Jeff understood what Helen was trying to say.
"Oh I see. Um, Sykes, are you sure you are up to it?"
"Yeah," he replied, wiping his face with the back of his hand. "I need to do this, for Tayler."
"I'm coming too," said Helen rising to her feet.
"I don't really think…"
Helen interrupted him, "Jeff, just bloody try and stop me!"
She looked at Gavin, "Come on, let's go and get this over and done with."
They went to leave. Jeff stopped them.
"Sykes, word's getting around about what you did out there today. Putting yourself on the line. There's talk of a commendation. You did your best."
"Yeah, but it wasn't good enough was it," he replied bitterly as he left.
The morgue attendant lead them down a hallway.
"Can we both go in?" Helen asked tentatively as they reached the door.
"If you want," said the attendant.
"How does she…. I mean how bad…." Gavin tried to focus on his question, but the words just wouldn't come out.
"No, she must have broken her spine. It would have been instant. I know that isn't a consolation really. She will look like she is sleeping, really. There are no visible marks that.…."
"Thanks," said Gavin, he didn't really want to know anymore.
They walked into the room. It was quiet and clinical.
A body, hidden under a stark white cover, lying on a cold flat mortuary slab.
Gavin was willing it not to be Tayler, but preliminary identification had all but confirmed it. He could see strands of her red locks escaping from under the edge of the sheet.
He didn't want it to be true.
It couldn't be true.
But he knew it was before the sheet was removed from her face.
Helen and Gavin broke down and wept from their hearts and the sight of her pretty young face now a ghostly white. Her lips were a soft shade of blue and her proud red hair mattered and tangled around her head.
She was really gone.
~*~*~*~
And now back at the Cutter Bar, Gavin was dreaming about what might have been. Remembering their experiences together, on and off duty.
And he drank to the memory of his beautiful Tayler, who was now lost to this world forever.
The End