Title: Chaos in the Classroom
Rating: T, but tell me if it should be higher.
Genre: Gakuen, AU
Characters/Pairings: Gilbert and Lovino (Prussia and South Italy), side pairings
Summary: AU. Lovino is working on his Biology test, but the irritating punk who sits to the left of him decides that bugging him sounds like the most enjoyable thing in the world.
Notes: My first fanfic~ *throws a fistful of confetti into the air* I think this'll be only a one-shot, but if enough people want continuations I might make more chapters.
DISCLAIMER: This is kinda like what happened in my Bio class. Except the end part. That's not what happened. Oh, and I do not support throwing chairs in class rooms. It's a no-no and it would cause concussions. Probably. Anyways, I also don't own Hetalia. Nope, I don't. Not at all.
The sound of pencil on paper filled the classroom. Mr. Kirkland's Biology students were taking a test on their most recently covered chapter. Biology was not one of Lovino's strong suits in the slightest, yet he was determined to pass the test. This meant no getting angry, no temper tantrums, no doodles, and absolutely no distractions. He looked up from his scan-tron and stretched his neck as he thought about the current question he was on.
Okay, Lovino thought, If number 17 was A, then number 21 should be... He looked over the options quickly. C! He thought as he filled in the small bubble. There were only 50 questions, so he was already halfway done. I wonder how far all of these bastards are... Probably not anywhere near me. Satisfied that he was obviously the smartest person ever, he looked up from his paper to see how everyone else was doing. A quick glance to his right showed no one was done at least, but as he turned his head to the left he saw the person next to him was done. Looking slightly up, to his horror, the one finished was Gilbert. Fucking. Beilschmidt. Lovino couldn't be angrier.
"Remember not to look at anyone's tests, my little Lovi~" Gilbert said smugly. Lovino just sneered back.
"Like I would copy you, I bet you just guessed on every single question." He retorted quietly. (As not to get caught talking, of course. Lovino was not a weakling, dammit!)
"I'll have you know, shorty, that Biology is one of my favorite subjects~ You having trouble with the test? Sorry, but his awesomeness won't retort to cheating." Gilbert said
"Shorty? I'm like, one inch shorter than you!" Lovino whispered.
"How tall are you?"
"5' 6''."
"5'9''~"
"Fuck you." Lovino retorted. He just glared right into Gilbert's red eyes. I bet that he is plotting something, I didn't know what, but I can see he is plotting something. It was the way his red eyes twinkled, you could tell he was planning mischief... Wait, Gilbert's eyes didn't sparkle! They just... thought of ways to tease poor Lovino. Because my life sucks. Gilbert's just a bastard... Lovino's thoughts trailed off.
"Uh, Lovi?" Gilbert said as he poked Lovino. "Don't you have a test to get doing?"
"Huh?" Lovino snapped out of his thoughts, "Oh, shit! Shut up and let me work, okay?"
"Heh, sure thing Boss~" Gilbert said as he gave a mock salute.
A few more problems later, and Lovino stretched his arms back behind him. He noticed movement in the side of his eye and looked to his left once more. What the hell is he- oh my god. Lovino visibly paled as he noticed what exactly Gilbert was doing. He was picking at a scab on his hand. A scab on his fucking hand. Okay, if that wasn't gross, then nothing in the whole fucking world was. As Gilbert peeled it, blood and pus came out from the edges. Lovino felt his stomach doing fucking gymnastics. He roughly jabbed Gilbert's shoulder to get his attention.
"Dude, that's fucking gross, so cut it out. I swear, you are so damn distracting!" Lovino said almost loudly.
"I'm only distracting because I radiate awesomeness. And here, I'm getting rid of it. If you don't like it, then don't look, buddy" Gilbert said irritated as he peeled a bit more at the annoyance.
"Bastard, that's gross, just stop picking at it!" Lovino grabbed his stomach "Uggh... Jackass, you're making me feel sick..."
"Fuck, just don't be sick on me, I'm too awesome to smell like shit!" Gilbert exclaimed, gaining Mr. Kirkland's attention.
"May I remind the class," The instructor said looking up from his book, "That there is absolutely NO TALKING during a test?" He glared at Gilbert and Lovino before returning to his book. Lovino turned back to his test and filled in a few more problems. But it was only a matter of time for Gilbert to start talking again.
"Yeah, Lovi, just ignore it. Keep your big-ass mouth shut and work on the easy-peasy test like a good little boy~"
"ME?" Lovino whisper-yelled, jabbing Gilbert in the shoulder again. "This is all YOUR fault!"
"Lovino, you're really starting to bug me." Gilbert's expression darkened.
"YOU'VE been bugging ME!"
"Lovino, just shut up and work."
"Two words for ya, bastard! Make. Me." Lovino retaliated while glaring at Gilbert, test be damned. He just wanted to kick Gilbert's smug little ass. And what could that wimpy potato do, anyways? Nothing, that's what! Slowly, though, Gilbert's dark expression turned into a creepy smile. Really creepy. Like, Ivan Braginski creepy. What the fuck is making him so happy? Thought Lovino. He just shrugged and returned to his test.
"Oh, don't worry Lovino. I'll make you~" Gilbert whispered to himself before laughing.
Kesesesesesesesese~
Lovino was finally nearing the end of the test, on question 48, when Gilbert enacted his so called 'Awesome War Plan'. Lovino was just about to fill in the 'E' option for number 48 when he noticed out of the corner of his eye that Gilbert flicked something. Lovino followed whatever it was with his eyes and saw it land right on the bubble he was about to fill in. And it was the fucking scab. Slowly Lovino turned to Gilbert, mouth agape. Gilbert smirked.
"Made ya be quiet, didn't I?" He chortled. "Oh, and hey, Lovi." He leaned forward and kissed his nose. "Love ya, Lovino~" Now, if Lovino hadn't been speechless before, he was now. His face became as red as the tomatoes he loved to eat and shock became anger.
"YOU- YOU-" Lovino stuttered.
"Awesome guy? Beautiful person? Am I getting warmer? Because your face sure is. You look like a little tomato~" Gilbert laughed. Apparently the little tomato comment did not sit well with Lovino. Because at that he became violent.
"YOU BASTARD!" Lovino screeched as he began wild and poorly aimed punches toward Gilbert. Gilbert just ducked and jumped out of his chair as to not even risk a small punch.
"YOU LOVE ME~" Gilbert laughed again, making his way away from the barrage of hardly threatening punches. In his rage Lovino picked up the thing that was closest to him to throw at Gilbert. Gil's chair. And throw it Lovino did.
"SHUT UP! I DO NOT! YOU ARE A BASTARD!" Lovino yelled as he threw the chair. But Gilbert ducked and the chair headed straight toward Mr. Kirkland. As the chair came towards him, a student rushed from his desk and caught the chair before it hit the teacher.
"Geez, that almost hit ya. You okay, Artie?" Alfred questioned, concerned, as he safely set down the chair.
"I told you before, Alfred, it is Mr. Kirkland or even Arthur but no nicknames, please. Er, thank you for catching that chair." Arthur said awkwardly. "Ah, and yes I am okay, thanks for asking- MR. VARGAS, IF YOU THROW ONE MORE CHAIR, I WILL-" But of course, another chair was thrown. And with it, profanities towards the Albino next to Arthur. Mr. Kirkland marched across the room and pulled Lovino's arms behind his back.
"Mr. Vargas and Mr. Beilschmidt. Detention. After school." He said sternly before letting a slightly calmer Lovino go. Lovino rubbed his wrists and looked at Arthur defiantly.
"Fine, it's just detention, at least I can get away from that- Wait, with HIM?" Lovino pointed at the German who silently watched Lovino and Arthur.
"Yes, him. You are lucky that detention is all I give you, I should give you both zeroes." The teacher said with a sigh and a rub of his temples.
"I think Gilbert deserves a zero..." Lovino replied, trying to win the argument.
"Double detention, Vargas."
"WHAT DID I-"
"Say one more thing, and it will be triple." Arthur interrupted. Lovino closed his mouth and looked down at his shoes, feeling defeated. At this action, Gilbert promptly walked over to Mr. Kirkland and smiled at him. Just before Arthur could ask what he was doing he slammed his foot as hard as he could into Arthur's.
"Oops~ Sorry, Eyebrows~~" Gilbert snickered.
"DOUBLE DETENTION FOR YOU TOO!" Arthur yelled as he held his foot. "Alfred, would you please stay after class today?"
"Aww, what for?" Alfred slumped over.
"You were... uh... involved in physical confrontation." Arthur said after some thought.
"But I hardly- Ohhh..." Alfred finally realized Arthur's hints and winked over exaggerating it. "I gotcha, teach~" Arthur just deadpanned in response and turned to the rest of the class, clearing his throat, face tinted pink.
"Well, what are you all staring at? There is still a test going on. Please take your seats." Slowly the class migrated back to their tests, grumbling. Lovino quickly finished his test and began to pout. Two whole detentions with Gilbert! Lovino sighed. Two whole detentions with Gilbert... He glanced back to Gilbert, who smiled back happily. Maybe he could make this work. And with that thought, a small and rare gem of a smile graced Lovino's usually smiling face.
Class was dismissed. And then Alfred and Arthur had hot and passionate sex in the classroom. And Lovino and Gilbert watched. *shot*
AN: So, what did you guys think? I think it's pretty great for my first fanfic, personally... Leave a review if you want, and if you guys want more of this story, then I might. I dunno, I'm currently working on another fanfic right now. It's a Spamano~ I just really like writing Romano's character...