This is a crack filled fanfic. This is written in scriped text. I don't own anything.
Eric Slingby and the Malignant Growth
Part 5
Characters: Eric, Ronald, Grell, Alan & William.
Grell: Oh, Mr, Mr Slingby.
Eric: Oh! Grell, oh wow you startled me.
Grell: What are you doing in my room?
Eric: Oh I'm just here looking at.. Um.. Facebook, I'm trying to get the.. Um.. account for Alan, for our date, I'm trying to find out more information about him, you know to find his likes and stuff like that. I'm on Facebook.
Grell: Why, why is you shirt off then?
Eric: Why is you face so stupid you stupid whore, you stupid whore ages and whore years! Every seven years you get more whoreny!
Oh no, I really didn't mean any of that, I'm truly sorry indeedly I am, Grell.
Grell: Are you shore?
Eric: Yes, yes. You see I've been trying to.. Um.. Long into Facebook, Alan's Facebook account all day long, but it doesn't seem to let me in unless I have an account myself, it's been really quite the puzzle.
Ronald: Hey Sempai!
Eric: Hey Ronald wha..!
Ronald: Todays my birthday, I'm 42 years old!
Eric: Ronald, ah, what are you doing! No don't, stay off that! It's my personal thing! No no no no! No Ronald, that's my personal information.. Um.. Facebook!
Ronald: My name's Lakwesha Jackson!
Eric: Ohhh, you have an account!
Ronald: I'm 42!
Eric: There he is! That's him! Grell look at this! It's him, it's the thing, the person I was telling you about who's so much more prettier than you! Look at it! Ohh, look at him!
Ronald: I'm 42 years old!
Eric: Click him, click the face, click this thing!
Ronald: I've been on the moon!
Eric: Click it!
Ronald: I've been on the moon!
Eric: Click this thing Ron.
Ronald: I've been on the moon!
Eric: Click the thing!
Ronald: I'm 42 years old!
Eric: Touch it on the screen.
Ronald: I have a turtle and a monkey!
Eric: If my hand was a mouse I would click it.
Ronald: I like POTATOES!
Eric: Click that!
Ronald: I take college notes on FOIL PAPER!
Eric: Click the thing!
Ronald: CLICK HAS 5 LETTERS!
Eric: Ron! I'm not playing with you click the damn thing!
Ronald: I work 14 jobs to pay my rent!
Eric: Click this fucking thing Ron! I'm not playing with you! I will kill you.
Ronald: I know my best friend for 4 years!
Eric: I will hurt you Ron if you don't click this thing!
Ronald: My man don't own me. I own my man!
Eric: I punch you stupid!
Ronald: I've been on the moon!
Eric: Click it before I buy a car and drive you to Wal-Mart and leave you there!
Ronald: My weave cost my $0.50!
Eric: I'm gonna throw you in a chemical fire so fast that Naruto won't believe it !
Ronald: My house has 3 FRONT DOORS!
Eric: And you'll have to masturbate like you've never done before to squash the flames.
Ronald: 13's a BIG number!
Eric: I'll kick you so hard your nipples will ejaculate and my foot will break off in your pelvis and you'll menstruate TOE NAILS AND SHOE POLISH .
Grell: Why don't you just click th..?
Eric: Why don't you just shut the fuck up! No one's asking for you opinion no one's asking for your stupid fucking opinion you STUPID WHORE, you HOLY PIECE OF POOP, you CRAP PISS, you FUNCKY MONKEY, you STUPID LITTLE BOY, you GIRLY MAN, you BOY WOMAN, you STUPID WARP WOMAN, WHORE!
Oh, I'm sorry I really didn't mean any of that.
Ronald: Hey Sempai!
Eric: I'm seriously didn't mean that
Ronald: Hey Sempai!
Eric: I didn't mean any of that.
Ronald I'm 42 years old!
Eric: I'm stressed out by this kid.
Ronald: I'm 42!
Eric: Don't touch!
Ronald: HEY!
Eric: Ron! Stop It!
Ronald: I'm gonna touch you!
Eric: There's no touching! No Touch! Back OFF! Don't touch me!
Ronald: Hey Sempai!
Eric: I don't even touch myself! You don't touch me!
Eric: Hey Sempai!
Eric: I don't touch myself! I don't! I don't touch myself! No one touches me cause I don't touch myself!
Ronald: I went to FIRST GRADE today!
Eric: Ron!
Ronald: I live on the MOON!
Eric: Serously stop it before I
Ronald: I got a B in CIVICS!
Eric: Ron shut up before I open up your mouth and rape you brains!
Ronald: I live in the ATTIC!
Eric: You want that? You want your brains raped? I'll rape them all across this floor if I have to! I'll rape them and I'll be like " This is so squishy! What the fuck have I been doing all my life when I could have been raping brains!" Don't make me do it!
Ronald: Hey Sempai! Hey Sempai! Hey Sempai!
Eric: RON! What! What do you want?
Ronald: I'm 42!
Eric: Oh look! That's him that's Alan that's the person I was telling you about! Look at him he's wearing a dress in his profile that means he's funny! I get that! Let me look at his friend's ! who is this? William. T. Spears, I know that person! I know this person right here! He like Brock Obama, I… Don't.. Know who that is but that's cool! That's a good picture right there, I like that one, I know this guy too! We have so much in common! Wow this is amazing! See that picture! That's a good picture! See that fucking pic….